With a face filled with pain at remembering that night, Lisa said, “Then it was my turn. My chance to answer her questions. Questions like, ‘Why did you give me up?’ and ‘What is my real family like?’ And the hardest one of all: ‘What kind of person are you?’ How? How do you look into the eyes of an innocent young woman and tell her what I had to tell her?”
After a long pause, she said, “As it turned out, I didn’t have the chance. We’d been in the kitchen talking for more than an hour. I hadn’t yet gone out front to lock up. Neither of us heard the entry bell jingle. He must have silenced it as he came in. I spun around as he bumped the tray of clean cookie sheets, sending them crashing to the floor. Instantly, a night I couldn’t imagine getting any worse suddenly did. There stood our father, a gun in his hand, hate in his eyes, and my daughter not three feet from him.”
Aunt Gladys was almost beside herself with emotion. Hearing Lisa’s voice filled with the same fear she must have felt that night was heartrending. She wanted to move closer to her, to reassure her that she was there for her, but this was not the time. She knew Lisa was using every bit of strength she had just to get through this story. All she could do was sit there and listen as Lisa struggled on.
Everyone watched as Lisa closed her eyes, trying to drive from her mind that horrible image of her father and her daughter in the same room. Finally, Lisa went on. “At first, I think Hope thought it was just a robbery. He was obviously surprised I wasn’t alone. He said something about my always being alone at the bakery this time of night. It was then that I knew he must have been watching me for sometime. I was trying to think of a way to get between him and my daughter, but my brain wouldn’t work. I was so scared I couldn’t think.
“Hope begged him not to hurt us. While offering him her purse, she said, ‘Please, take whatever you want and leave.’ She had no idea she was pleading with her own grandfather.
“He slapped the purse out of her hand, shouting, ‘I didn’t come here for money. I came for justice. I’ve waited a long time for this, and I’m going to enjoy every minute of it.’
“I stood there frozen while Hope continued pleading for us. ‘Please, don’t shoot us. Why would you want to hurt us?’
“Hope’s face was filled with fear and bewilderment and then terror as she heard his response, ‘I don’t intend to shoot her. That would be much too quick. I intend to take my time. I’m going to make sure she feels every single blow.’
“The way he emphasized the word ‘her’ suddenly set me in motion. I knew he wouldn’t let my daughter out of there alive. He intended to beat me to death, but he was also going to kill her. He had to. So I grabbed the copper pot we melt chocolate in and let it fly, hitting him on the upper arm. It startled him, and he jumped back, hitting his elbow on the doorjamb. That jarred his hand, and the gun fell to the floor. All three of us dove for it, but while I struggled with him to get the gun, I was also screaming at Hope to run. I kept screaming, ‘Get out of here! Run!’
“She jumped up and ran, but just as she reached the back door leading to the alley, he slammed me backward and went after her. She got the door unlocked, but as she pushed it open he was grabbing her with one hand and he had the gun in the other. All I could think of was saving her. I jumped up, grabbed my marble rolling pin, and ran out into the alley where Hope was struggling to get free of him.”
Wiping the perspiration from her lips, Lisa tried to maintain her composure. This was the third time in three days she’d had to repeat this story, and she wasn’t sure she’d be able to finish. Taking a deep breath, she leaned forward for a moment. Duncan offered her a glass of water while everyone else sat there stunned.
After gathering her composure, Lisa continued. “I needed to get him off her. He was wild with rage, screaming all kinds of horrible things. I thought if I could knock him out cold, I could get her out of there, but I was afraid I might hit Hope. So I forced my body between them, shoving the gun away from Hope’s face. I again screamed at her to run, but this time she wouldn’t. That’s when he grabbed me by the throat with his free hand and slammed me up against the door. I couldn’t breathe, and I couldn’t fight back. That’s when I dropped the rolling pin. Hope started pulling his hair, trying to get him to let go of me. I was trying to wrestle the gun from him when she picked up the rolling pin and hit him. Just as she hit him, the gun went off. At first, I didn’t know who, if anyone, had been shot. I stared at Hope’s face, praying not to see pain. Then he slumped down, and I knew he’d been shot.”
Duncan quickly interjected, “That’s why the autopsy reports didn’t jell. The prosecution knew he had been hit from behind, but Lisa wouldn’t explain how.”
Jumping to his feet, Scott shouted excitedly, “So it was self-defense. She can prove it. Hope can tell them.”
Duncan leaned forward and offered, “That was our next problem. Lisa didn’t want Hope involved.”
At that Susan shrieked, “What! You’re kidding! Lisa, she was there. She knows what happened, and you’re not going to let her testify? Why?”
“Because I didn’t want her life destroyed because of me. I begged her to leave. I wanted her to get back on a plane for California and forget about this. She didn’t want to, but I convinced her it was the only way. After I persuaded her to leave, I locked the front door, tossed the rolling pin behind some boxes in the storage room, wiped the gun clean of her prints, tripped the alarm, and waited for the police to come. I didn’t want her involved. I decided I was going to tell the truth but leave her out of it. If she hadn’t been there that night, it still would have happened. I would have rather spent the rest of my life in prison than involve her.”
Finally the truth was sinking in. Scott looked into Lisa’s face and saw a lioness desperately trying to protect her cub. It wasn’t fear of their finding out about Hope that had kept her quiet all these months. She was trying to protect her daughter from being hurt. As gently as he could, Scott suggested, “Lisa, she’s already involved. You can’t change that.”
During this meeting Aunt Gladys had remained quiet, but now she knew she needed to speak up. “Lisa, the shame and secrets your parents forced you and Susan to endure almost destroyed the two of you. If you force this girl to keep this secret, you’re placing her behind that same wall of silence you just told us you’ve been living behind. It’ll destroy her much more than the truth will. Give this girl a chance to know you and forgive you. But most of all, give her a chance to help you. You owe her that.”
Not waiting for Lisa’s response, Gladys turned to Mr. Duncan and asked, “How much trouble could Hope be in for running? And if Lisa agrees, how do we get her back here to testify?”
Mr. Duncan gave Gladys a big smile and then filled them in on his secret. “That’s what we’ve been working on for the past week. You see, the only reason I found out about this is because Hope’s attorney contacted me last weekend. Apparently, she did keep quiet for almost two months. Her parents wrote off her strange behavior to having a bad meeting with her birth mother. When she didn’t want to talk about it, they decided to leave her alone. After some time went by, she couldn’t stand it and told them. They weren’t really sure what they were dealing with. At that point they weren’t even certain he’d been seriously injured. Hope’s father made a few phone calls and discovered that not only had he died, but the victim was Hope’s natural grandfather and her mother was on trial for his murder.”
Everyone sat still. Bill Thomas leaned forward and asked, “So where is she? Why didn’t they tell the police the truth when they found out?”
Almost shouting his answer, Duncan said, “They did!” Then, a little calmer, he continued. “When they found out what was going on here, Hope’s father called and talked to Gordon himself. They offered to bring her back here and tell what she saw, but were told to sit tight. They waited another week then called again. This time they received a not-so-veiled threat of serious repercussions if it was discovered that their daughter had indeed been invol
ved. At this point, Hope’s father hired his own attorney, fearing Hope was in serious trouble.”
“Is she? Can they go after her for running?” Bill’s question quickly brought everyone to attention. Suddenly they had another serious issue to deal with.
Mr. Duncan sat back in his chair and grinned like a Cheshire cat. “Well, she could have been in real trouble. Leaving the scene of any crime is serious; leaving the scene of murder is even more serious. When her attorney called me to find out what was going on, I immediately went to Judge Kirkley with my suspicions. He ordered a quiet investigation and discovered that Gordon’s phone records showed he knew about Hope a full month before the trial. Judge Kirkley has ordered a full investigation, and I wouldn’t want to be Mr. Gordon right now. In any event, he wouldn’t consider going after Hope now, so she’s safe.”
“I never did like that man,” Ruth Bascom thundered. “But why did he go after Lisa like that?”
Duncan then offered up his and Judge Kirkley’s full suspicions. “You see, yesterday morning I had breakfast with someone in city hall. He wants to stay off the record, but apparently Gordon has had his eye on running for district attorney. He tried unsuccessfully a few years back. Around the first of March word got around that Sam Crane, the current DA, has been diagnosed with cancer and would be stepping down soon. This person I talked to said Gordon was anxious to put together a case that would give him some press time. He needed to gain what they call in politics ‘curb appeal.’
“Not one month after finding out the post was coming up for grabs, Lisa’s case was dropped into his lap. Apparently he was going around to his friends in city hall bragging how this case had all the titillation of a dime-store novel, how he could keep the papers filled for weeks with new tidbits of information. He thought he had the perfect vehicle to keep his name in front of the public for most of the summer. Then with this conviction, he thought he could ride right into the November election as the great defender of the streets of Jefferson.”
Scott’s response reflected most everyone’s reaction to this news. “That creep! So he was behind all those ugly articles in the paper?”
Duncan nodded an affirmative and then continued. “I think Gordon did believe Lisa had done it, at least at first. Remember, Lisa was lying, and the evidence didn’t jell. He really thought he had a strong case. But after two months of shooting off his mouth, living the life of guest speaker around town, and a few weeks before his career-changing trial, this new information drops out of nowhere. It threatened to turn him into a laughingstock. I think he felt he could scare these people into staying quiet and staying out of town. After all, Lisa wasn’t stepping forward with this information. He saw that she had her reasons for keeping quiet, so I think he felt he could get away with it. Imagine his surprise when he found out they showed up on Saturday.”
Almost in unison, everyone responded, “They’re here?”
Then Susan stammered, “You mean they’re here in Jefferson? Can we meet her?”
“Well, yes and no. Yes, they’re here in Jefferson, but no, I don’t want you meeting with or talking to any of them until after she testifies on Monday.” Duncan then added, “I want to be able to ask her if, before coming to court, she has talked with any friends or members of Lisa’s family. I want a resounding ‘no’ out of her. Therefore, I want you all to keep a clear path of this family until after she testifies.”
It was getting late, and Duncan had a lot to do. Bringing the meeting to a close, he turned to Ruth Bascom and said, “This morning, while you were here in court, a search warrant was issued and executed at your bakery. They recovered the rolling pin and are doing all the necessary tests to verify that Lisa and Hope’s story is true. I’m sorry I wasn’t able to warn you, but I didn’t want either of you upset and second-guessing yourselves while on the witness stand.”
“I understand. They can take anything they need if it’ll help.” Ruth then turned to Lisa. “Honey, you were going to let that horrid Mr. Gordon put you in prison in order to protect your child? You do beat all.”
As everyone was preparing to leave, Bill Thomas asked, “Mr. Duncan, why can’t Gordon just drop the charges against Lisa?”
Putting his things back down on the table, Duncan felt it important to explain this point. “Yes, Gordon could drop the charges. That would be the safest path for Gordon, and it would ensure Lisa’s freedom, but it wouldn’t really free her. This town would always think of her as a murderer who just got off. We need to put Hope on that stand Monday morning and allow the jury to hear what happened. Hope needs the closure, Lisa needs the vindication, and Gordon needs to be stopped. We’re talking about one more day in court. We can do this. We will do this, and we will win.”
As much as he wanted to give this family some more time to talk with Lisa, Duncan had mounds of work waiting for him back at his office. “I’d love to let you stay here and talk, but Lisa’s time is up and Officer Jackson needs to get her back next door. If you would quickly say your goodbyes, I’ll buzz the officer.”
Susan was the first to move. Everyone gave the sisters a moment alone. Neither said a word at first, they just fell into each other’s arms and hugged. Both were drained of emotion after this unusual day.
Lisa kept her arm around her sister as she turned to everyone and apologized.
“I’m so sorry I lied to you. It was stupid to think I could protect Hope by lying. I do hope you can forgive me, but I do want to say something before you leave. These past few months sitting in that jail, knowing I was lying but also knowing I was innocent, gave me lots of time to think about my life. It’s been hard, eating my meals with girls who are living the kind of life I used to live, hearing those same old sick excuses for why they’re doing it. I’ve been reliving some awfully painful memories in here, but it’s reminded me just how fortunate I am that you people reached out to me, even though I didn’t deserve it. I don’t even want to think about what might have happened to me if you had left me in my misery. You people loved me until I could begin to love myself. I’m sorry I didn’t trust you with the truth. I want you to know how much I love you and how very thankful I am that you never gave up on me.”
When Lisa finished, Susan pulled back slightly, and taking Lisa’s face in her hands, kissed her on the cheek. “We’re quite a pair, aren’t we? Until this trial forced it all out into the open, I never realized how much our parents were still controlling us. They so terrorized us about keeping secrets, we’ve both been afraid to look at the truth. Secrets were our way of protecting ourselves. A little while ago you said something about ending up your own prisoner. When you said that, it all clicked with me. I remembered something I heard Dr. Jacobson say once during a lecture. She said, ‘The lies we tell ourselves as children become the truth we live by as adults.’ For her, the lie was that God didn’t love her because she didn’t think He cared what she was suffering through. For you and me, it was the lie that secrets will protect us. Until you said that, I never understood that if you let your secrets build up in you, they become a wall that holds you prisoner. For us, it has sort of been a wall of silence. At first it protected us, but then we became its prisoner.”
Coming up behind them, Scott put his arms around them both. “Yes, but now that wall is down and there are no more secrets.”
With a steady voice Lisa made one last confession. “Scott, not all my secrets are out. I have one last one to confess, but this secret belongs to Hope first. Once I tell her who her father was, I’ll be ready to tell the rest of you.”
Susan looked at her sister, studying her face as she made this last declaration. She knew it was just going to be a matter of time before she knew who Hope’s father was, but wanting to take the pressure off Lisa, she said, “Right now we need to just be content that Lisa is finally safe. That’s enough for now.”
Beaming with happiness that her two girls were finally going to be all right, Aunt Gladys slapped her hand on the conference table and said, “I’ll say a hearty
amen to that,” bringing a round of tension-releasing laughter from everyone, including Mr. Duncan.
After giving everyone a minute or two more, Duncan buzzed for the officer, and Lisa was escorted back to jail.
Four long days lay ahead for everyone, days of knowing Hope was somewhere in town but miles away from all of them.
On Friday afternoon, Duncan called the house to let them know that the forensic report had come back.
“Susan, Hope’s fingerprints were found all over the rolling pin. I’m so thankful Lisa didn’t think to wipe it clean as she had the gun. She couldn’t remember if she had or not.”
“Mr. Duncan, how is Hope holding up? This must have been an unimaginable few months for her.”
Susan’s concerns for this girl were justified. All this had hit the girl hard, coming as it did out of nowhere.
“Yes, she’s quite upset. I haven’t told her the whole story yet. I want her to get on the stand and tell what happened from her perspective of that night. The less she knows, the better she’ll be able to focus on the events of that night. There will be plenty of time afterward to tell Hope the whole story.”
Then, almost afraid to hear his answer, Susan inquired about Hope’s parents. “What kind of people are they? I mean, do you think they’ll understand, once they know?”
Duncan decided it couldn’t hurt to tell her now, so he filled her in on a little secret of his own. “After promising me they wouldn’t discuss anything with Hope until after the trial, I agreed to let Mr. and Mrs. Winslow sit in the courtroom all last week. While Hope stayed hidden in the hotel room, they were sitting right behind your mother all week. They have a very good picture of what went on.”
“Winslow. That’s their name? Hope Winslow.” Straining her brain, Susan tried to picture the courtroom and who was sitting where, but she couldn’t place them. There were always so many people from town sitting there, enjoying the daily soap-opera atmosphere, that she had just tried to tune them all out. Now she was sorry she had.
Wall of Silence Page 35
