“Can I help with anything?” I asked Mum.
“You could help with Nikki.” Mum nodded toward the table where Nikki was happily feeding herself some banana. “Her lunch is in the microwave.”
After grabbing her meal from the microwave, I moved to sit with Nikki. She reached for the spoon with her banana-coated fingers. Grabbing the cloth, I wiped her down and then started to help her with her food.
“Max, you’re right to set yourself up in Brock’s room, aren’t you?” Mum added as she turned back to point out something on Parker’s homework.
“Sure thing,” Max said, slinging his bag over his shoulder.
Once Max had disappeared to the bedrooms, Mum came up and hugged me from behind, wrapping her hands around my neck and kissing the top of my head. “Congratulations on the win. Your father and I are so proud of you. Stepping out in the ProV8 like that, doing everything the team needed to get the result at the end of the day. It was a big ask of someone so young, and you did it perfectly.”
A blush crept over my cheeks. “I was just doing what Dad taught me.”
“But you did it. Many young drivers have fallen apart in similar situations.”
“It was fun.”
“What will you do if we can find a way for you to get over to the States next year? We’ll have to have another co-driver for the enduros.”
“Maybe I’d be able to fly home?”
“Sweetie, have you seen the schedule for stock car? It’s intense. There are a lot more races overall than in ProV8.”
“Oh. Well, I guess I’ll just have to do what I can.”
“Have you considered what you might do if we can’t organise a car?” Mum asked, her tone gentle.
I frowned as my hope sank. Was this her way of telling me they’d been having issues? “I don’t think I’ll have any choice but to stay here, will I? I need to keep sharp or I can’t expect to take the reins of the ProV8 when Steve retires.”
“And what will happen with Beau?”
I shrugged. Truthfully, I didn’t want to think about it. How much longer could we go on only seeing each other on the computer once every few weeks? Especially when being with him had opened my eyes to desires I’d never fully comprehended. Sure, I’d scratched my own itches in the past, but I’d never needed or ached the way I had since I’d come home from the States. Getting the balance right between us was becoming harder all the time.
“Here, let me take that over,” Mum said. “I’m sure you’ve got a boy to contact before he heads to bed.”
Her words reminded me of the date I’d arranged with Beau in the minutes after I’d won at Bathurst. He was going to be waiting up for me to call him. I raced upstairs to my room but stopped cold when I saw my door was open. I’d definitely shut it when I left a few days earlier, and considering I usually did my own cleaning, Mum wouldn’t have needed to open it. It meant someone else had to have gone into my room.
Annoyed at being unable to have any privacy, I pushed through my door. As it creaked open, I saw Max near my bedside table. He stood up ramrod straight and spun to face me.
“What are you doing in my room, Max?”
“Just, uh, looking for a pen.”
I frowned. “There’s none here. They’re in the study.”
“Oh, my bad.” Once again, I noticed how his voice was far too deep for his age. “I’ll, um, just be, uh, getting out of your way then.”
I stepped out of the way of the exit and narrowed my eyes further. Any ease we’d had with each other over the years vanished a little more with each visit. “Yeah, that’d be great.”
He moved to the door but lingered before leaving. “So that guy you were talking to in the States . . .”
“Beau.”
His eye twitched. “Yeah, him. So are you still, like, seeing him?”
“I don’t see how it’s anything to do with you.”
“Oh, of course, it’s not, but I was just wondering. I mean, it’s got to be hard with him being so far away, right? Wouldn’t you rather someone closer? Someone right in front of you.” His eyes implored me to understand his request.
I did, but I wasn’t about to admit that to him.
“Get out and please don’t come in here again.” It took everything in me not to say what I really wanted to say, but telling him to fuck off would only get me in trouble.
Trying to shake the irritation caused by Max’s intrusion in my personal space, I booted up my laptop. I was anxious to speak to Beau and was ready to spend as much time with him as possible before he had to go to bed.
At least, that was the plan until another woman answered his Skype.
Despite my surprise at seeing the petite blonde, I managed to stammer out, “Is Beau there?”
“Ah, he’s in the shower, sweetie.”
It was almost impossible for my mind not to go straight to the worst-case scenario for why she was in his house and he was in the shower. Is she the same girl as last time? I tried to remember the voice, but it’d been too many weeks and I couldn’t recall.
“He’ll probably be—”
A door behind her opened, and Beau came rushing out with a towel around his waist.
“Be right out, I guess,” the girl said with a chuckle as he plucked the laptop from her hold.
A few seconds later, the laptop was back in his room.
“Hi!” he said with a mile-wide grin and a flash of excitement in his eyes.
“Hey.” I couldn’t fight my own grin if I wanted to. “You’re in a good mood.”
“Why wouldn’t I be? I heard my girl did some great thangs this weekend.”
The warmth that spread over me at hearing him say my girl dispelled the shock of another woman answering his Skype. “It was so good, Beau. I’ve won before, obviously, but nothing like this. This is huge. A career making type thing. Even if I was only the co-driver, it was amazing.”
“Co-driver?”
With our ships-in-the-night schedules, I hadn’t had time to explain to him the ins and outs of the endurance races, or how a big deal it was for me to be stepping up into the ProV8 category for the first time. I gave him a quick rundown on it all.
“Sounds like a thrillin’ event.”
I shifted in my seat and grabbed a toy car that sat above my desk—a little replica of the first Emmanuel Racing car decked out in the livery Dad had worn when he placed third at Bathurst during his comeback. “It is, especially when it’s the reason for all of this. For Emmanuel Racing. For everything.”
“Not sure I follow you, darlin’.”
“Sometimes I forget how little you know.”
“How little you’ve told me.” It was impossible not to read more into his tone than was actually there. The emotional void between us seemed to gape a little wider with each week that passed. It was exactly what I’d worried would happen. Proof that I was right to run like I had in Georgia, and that I should have resisted the lure of an attempt at long-distance.
It made me feel like a three-year-old getting in trouble and I frowned.
“You were the one who asked me not to google ya, remember?”
“I know and I’m glad that you haven’t. There’s so much bullshit on there. It’s just that most people I know are well aware of all the history,” I babbled. “Emmanuel Racing’s start is a bit of a local legend in Australia.”
“That’s the team you work for?”
I swallowed. Would he be okay with what I was going to say next? “It’s the team my parents own.”
“Oh, wow. They own the team?”
There was a flash of something familiar across his face. Something I’d seen so many times before and it killed me to see it on his features. Combined with the intrusion of Max and the thought that someone else could potentially be taking my place in the ProV8 for the enduros the following year—or worse, that I’d be stuck away from Beau for longer—it raised my hackles faster than one of my Bathurst laps.
“I earned my place in that car,” I snapped, my voice f
ull of the defences I’d built over the years. It was one thing to question myself on my worthiness to be in the car from time to time, another entirely to have Beau’s silent accusation. It was clear in his look that he was about ready to accuse me of benefiting from nepotism, and that pissed me off.
“I never said ya didn’t.”
“You didn’t have to say anything. You don’t think I haven’t seen that exact same look in the eyes of almost everyone at the track?”
He held his hands up in surrender. “I didn’t mean anything by it, darlin’.”
It didn’t escape my attention that he didn’t apologise. “It’s the goddamned karts all over again,” I snarled, recalling our disaster race in the States. “I should have known then that you weren’t any different.”
“Darlin’, I didn’t say a single dang thang.” His voice was just as raised as mine.
“I know what you’re thinking though. Track princess only in the car because of who her daddy is. Couldn’t possibly have deserved it.”
“If you’re so quick to think that’s what I’m thinkin’, then maybe it’s your issue, not mine.”
“Yeah, maybe it is my damned issue, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t exactly what you were thinking.”
His smile had long since fallen, and now his features dragged into a frown. “If that’s your opinion, I ain’t likely to change it now, am I?”
“Tell me I’m wrong. Tell me that there wasn’t even some part of you that questioned, even for a second, whether the only reason I’m in a car is because of my family.” I wanted him to smooth it over like he had at the Fun Spot. To tell me that I hadn’t seen the look, that he didn’t think I was only on the team because of nepotism.
He remained silent.
“You can’t, can you?” I bit my lip to stop the tears that wanted to fall.
“Well, ya have to admit it ain’t common for someone to be in a car at an elite level at eighteen.”
“Dad was about the same age when he got his start.”
“But that’s my point, if you come from a legacy of drivers, what d’ya ’spect?”
“Legacy of drivers? Are you fucking kidding me? Dad started Emmanuel Racing, for your fucking information.” My tears burned my eyes even though I couldn’t really say why his words had made me so furious. Maybe because it felt like Beau was effectively discounting Dad’s hard work—and therefore mine too.
“Whoa, darlin’, there ain’t no need to get feisty.”
“Emmanuel is my twin,” I said as tears pricked my eyes. I didn’t even know if he’d remember the significance of the words—the first night we met. “The team was named for him. Our family has sacrificed and put our blood, sweat, and tears into that damn team.”
Beau frowned and went to say something more, but I cut him off.
“All I wanted to do was celebrate my win with you, but I guess that was too much to ask. Well, thank you for ruining this for me. I should fucking come over there to prove my position was earned.”
He was about to reply when his door opened.
“Beau?” The blonde from earlier came into the room, carrying a mixing spoon coated with something chocolatey—a cake or pudding mix, or maybe the frosting.
“What do you want, Cass?” he snapped at his guest.
She leaned against the doorjamb and licked the spoon. “Just wondering how much longer you’re going to be?”
“Don’t let me keep you,” I said, leaning forward to reach the disconnect button.
“Wait,” he said, his gaze rushing back to me. The instant before I cut the call, I saw his hurt echo in his eyes.
“Arsehole,” I muttered under my breath as I slammed the laptop closed.
A second later, my phone chimed. Please come back online so I can talk to you.
I wasn’t ready to do that yet. My heart still pounded in my ears and I could practically taste my disappointment in Beau on my tongue. Why would you want to talk to a track princess who didn’t have to work for her place on her team?
Barely a minute later, his reply came. You know that’s not what I meant. Please, call me so we can talk.
Sorry, Beau, I’m going out tonight. Maybe I’ll find someone who will be happy for me while I’m out. It was a cheap shot, but I wanted to hurt him like he’d hurt me with his assumptions. Without the benefit of his touch to soothe me, it felt impossible to calm my rage.
I am happy for you.
I was tempted to throw the phone out the window to stop him replying. By then, I didn’t want him to calm me down. Funny way of showing it. By the way, who’s the girl?
A friend.
His short reply only served to piss me off more. Sure. I’ve got plenty of friends who come to my house and make baked goods right before bed. Enjoy your fucking frosting.
Instead of texting me back, Beau called. Knowing we’d only get into an argument with the mood I was in, I rejected the call and then turned my phone off.
Angel arrived a little over an hour later, after I’d had time to shower and change for our night out. Once I’d filled her in on what had me in a foul mood, she commanded I leave my phone at home, insisting that Mum and Dad could reach me on hers if they needed me.
After admonishing me for my possible overreaction—even though she understood why it had happened—she helped me put my mind at rest over the girl at Beau’s house. After all, if it weren’t innocent, wouldn’t the woman have questioned why another woman was Skyping him?
Unless it’s a common occurrence.
Fuck.
Angel let me wallow for precisely the length of time it took for us to have dinner. As soon as I’d finished eating, she declared the rest of the evening a drama-free zone. Then she did her best to distract me. The only thing she couldn’t control were the guys dancing around us and the paps circling the dance floor.
By the time we got back to my house, I was ready to call Beau to apologise. I picked up my phone from my dresser and scrolled through to his name, but Angel put her hand over mine. “Let him stew for a few more hours and call him in the morning. I’m tired.”
THE FOLLOWING morning, Mum and Dad came in to drag Angel and me to a celebratory breakfast with the whole family. I grabbed my phone and shot Beau a quick text apologising for the night before. It was only when I’d taken my first bite of food that I wondered why my phone had been on when I grabbed it. I frowned as I recalled turning it off before we went out, but that it had been on when I picked it up later that night.
Maybe I hadn’t turned it off after all. It wouldn’t have been the first time I pushed Restart instead of Power Off.
“We have a surprise for you!” Mum said over the table, putting the thoughts out of my mind.
“We’ve secured a car,” Dad said before waiting for her to finish her announcement.
“You said I could tell her,” Mum said. She pouted her lip, catching Dad’s eye.
“I couldn’t help myself,” he said as he leaned over to kiss her.
“Hey, can we focus on me for a moment? You were saying?”
Dad shot me a cheeky grin but still touched his lips to Mum’s for a brief kiss.
“We were saying you’re US bound if you still want to be,” Mum said.
While Mum and Dad had been working on the deal, we’d kept everyone else in the loop so it wouldn’t be a surprise if it happened. Neither Mum nor Dad believed in secrets.
“Are you kidding me?” A tingle of excitement built within me that I could see Beau again. That I could apologise to him in person. That we could actually give us a red-hot go without worrying about the distance or trying to align our crazy schedules. “Of course I want to! Is it really all arranged?”
“We’ve had Fleur Amelia get behind the car already. They’re offering a significant package to have you on the track, and that’s given us the leverage to find you a team.”
“The florists? Really?” I was surprised that they were getting into racing sponsorship.
“Are you kidding? I’v
e never had an easier sell. With your history here and the information that you were going overseas to pursue young love, they jumped at the chance. I think they’re hoping for corporate sponsorship and coverage of the wedding.” Mum finished with a giggle.
My heart leapt and a chill raced along my skin. Dad choked on what he was eating.
“I think it’s too early to be talking marriage,” I said.
“Agreed!” Dad said after swallowing his mouthful.
“Who’s getting married?” Beth asked.
“Phoebe’s getting married, you ninny,” Brock said.
Max shifted uncomfortably and stared steadfastly at the plate in front of him.
“No one’s getting married,” I said, glaring at Mum for her careless comment.
“No one’s getting married, but Phoebe will be leaving us for a little while,” Mum added.
It was only when Mum said it that it really hit me. I was going to be leaving home. Moving out, for at least a year. “When?” I asked, my voice holding no volume. “Where?”
“Well, we needed to talk to you about that.” Dad shot Mum a saddened look.
“They want you over there for the last few races of this season,” Mum finished for him.
“Oh, that soon?”
“And they have a number of TV spots and photo shoots they want done throughout the off season,” Mum added.
“So over Christmas?” My blood turned to ice. “I’ll be away from everyone for Christmas?” I couldn’t help the tears that pricked at my eyes.
“We’re hoping to be able to get you home for Christmas, but it might not be possible.”
“Oh, wow. Oh, God.” My mouth went dry so I downed the rest of my Coke. It didn’t help. “I don’t know if I’m ready for this.”
“You still have a little time to change your mind,” Mum said. “But we do need to get everything signed pretty quickly to ensure it’s all stitched up ready to announce.”
I looked over at Angel, who was nodding encouragingly. Dad put his hand on mine.
“I know it’s scary, and if you wanted to stay at home, no one would think less of you,” he whispered in my ear. “But if you even think you might regret it later, it’s worth taking the chance on. It’s only a year-long commitment for now, after all.”
Phase (Phoebe Reede: The Untold Story #1) Page 31
