“Why shouldn’t we? What’s stopping you?” he questions, desire evident in his glowing eyes.
“Guilt. We shouldn’t have done it. I’m not that type of girl.” I hide my face in his neck, showing regret. He squeezes me to him tighter, burying his face in my hair. I let the tears fall over, faking a sob.
“I’m sorry,” he murmurs. I pull my head back, shocked. I didn’t expect him to be sorry, just to feel sorry for me. He brings his hands up to cup my face, brushing my tears away with his thumbs. “I didn’t realise you were with anyone. After the first night I just assumed you were available. I shouldn’t have put you in that position. You should have told me you weren’t available.”
“I was. That first night. I was available then. We only made it official last night.” I tell him softly. “We’ve dated for a while but not exclusive. After he saw me dancing last night he realised he didn’t want to share me. We were going to make a go of it. But then you were here when I got back. I did things I shouldn’t have.”
“Things you wanted though?”
“Yes.” I whisper. His lips come down to brush against mine in the softest of caresses. He pulls away, rubbing his stubble across my check, to kiss my ear.
“Things you want?” his husky voice nearly puts me to my knees. No, I need to stop this. No sex. Keep my head in the game. This is all just sex to him and I need to get him to fall in love with me.
“Yes.” I feel his lips curve into a smile. “But I can’t.” I push away from him and leave the room. I quickly race up the stairs to the room I’m staying in and firmly shut and lock the door.
I strip and head for the shower. I wash, dry and get into bed within ten minutes. Damon’s words when I first got back shocked me. I didn’t realise he could spit poison. I knew he could be mean, could humiliate but that wasn’t a show. Those were his feelings leaking out. No, that was venom. That was who he really is. That could work to my advantage. Maybe the jealousy is the way to get to his heart? Make him realise he wants me.
I pull out Lydia’s diary and flick to the first time he humiliated her.
March 15th 2011
I’m so pissed. He fucking humiliated me. Made me look like a fool in front of a room full of men. He must get off on it because I did nothing wrong. NOTHING.
He had his hands all over me going in to the meeting. Sure I flirted with the other men a little but that was all business. I knew I was turning him on just being next to him. I kept brushing up against him, hoping he would fuck me, after the meeting, like he wanted to.
I knew he wanted to fuck me on the desk from the look in his eyes, from his smile. He wanted me but he doesn’t like people to know about us. He just needs to sort some things out before we can tell people.
All I did was put my hand on his thigh and move it up. It’s not like anyone knew what we were doing.
He told me to leave. Fucking leave! Said I was being unprofessional and if I couldn’t behave in the correct manner then I should not come back.
I was so pissed. Maybe he was just angry with me.
Maybe I shouldn’t have flirted with his associates. He didn’t like it. I shouldn’t have done it. It was their fault for flirting with me first. I can make Damon see this.
I love him.
He’s mine.
I need him.
I put the diary under the pillow and gather in the hate swirling within me. I need to play nice, make him want me, and then deny what he wants. That’s what he did to Lydia. Gave her false signals. He turned her on then blamed her when she tried to get what he was dangling in front of her. He denied her then humiliated her. I need to wait to humiliate him. I need him caught.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
May 19th 2014
The past few days things between Damon and I have been tense. Every time we are in a room together the sexual tension is off the scales. It’s making me go crazy. I am constantly aroused by him, but also repulsed by myself, for wanting him. My brain and body are at war.
I’ve spent the last few days defining my plans, making sure I’m ready for anything he throws at me.
Nothing has happened since that night and we’ve barely said two words to each other. I miss him. I miss company full stop. Tom hasn’t returned any of my calls but he has sent a text though.
Ella, I meant what I said. Until this stops I can’t be there for you. Please think about what you’re doing, Tom x
It made me feel so sad, but then the anger set in. Another fucking man dictating to me what I should and shouldn’t do. Well fuck him too. I will not worry about him now. Nothing and no one will stop me from getting what I want, even if it means I lose a few friends along the way.
This was never about friends anyway. It was only ever about getting justice for Lydia. Nothing more, nothing less. If Tom can’t stand by my decisions then fuck him and his friendship. I don’t need him. I never have, I never will.
Walking into the living room I find Damon asleep on the couch. I stop in my tracks. Even asleep this man is beautiful. I kneel down in front of him, watching him. I can’t help it when my hand reaches and gently strokes his face. My palm runs across his cheek, his stubble feels rough against my hand.
He doesn’t open his eyes, so it surprises me when his large hand covers mine and he turns his head and kisses the palm of my hand. The move is so gentle it freezes me for a minute before I pull my hand away.
My heart races, my blood pounds in my ears. Where does this soft side come from? Lydia never wrote about this gentle side. It’s almost as if she didn’t get his full attention. He didn’t give her all of himself.
I can’t make myself turn and look at him. My head drops. Why does he have to be so gorgeous? Why do I find it hard to contain myself in his presence? It’s simple. I can’t let him touch me. I need to make him jealous to lure him in deeper.
I turn to move away. His hand comes up to grasp my arm.
“Ella, don’t. Please don’t pull away from me. Just stay and talk,” he whispers, staying silent while waiting for my reply. Confusion swims inside me, making me question things. Things that should never be in question.
His voice pulls at something deep inside. The gentleness of his voice and touch don’t make sense. He shouldn’t be like this. When he acts this way it’s like I’m with a different Damon Hunt. He hides his manipulative side better than I could have ever imagined. I need to keep that in mind.
“Damon, please... don’t. Don’t do this. I can’t... do this.” I get up to leave when he calls after me.
“Ella, we don’t have to do anything. Can’t we try and just be friends?” He says friend like it causes him physical pain, like the word is torture for him. I know otherwise. “Just stay and watch something for a while. We don’t have to talk.”
I don’t know why but I move to the chair in the corner and turn on the TV. Damon relaxes back down, relief showing on his face. Good. He can feel like he won this game but he hasn’t. I thought keeping a distance was the best way to proceed but from the look on his face, I know this is the better idea.
I feel triumphant, like I have won something, although sitting here like this, feeling comfortable and content I’m not sure if I really have.
I’m starting to think that maybe I’m no longer playing the same game as him. Maybe my games are working already. Or he’s just not playing them.
****
May 21st 2014
We spent the next few nights like this together in the living room. I moved from the chair to sitting on the sofa with Damon. Things became easier between us. It isn’t so hard to just be around him. As long as we aren’t touching things usually turn out ok. We even started talking, but last night when things shifted to my family I made excuses and left the room, making it clear that it was not a topic I wished to discuss.
Tonight I am sitting waiting for Damon to come home from work. I made dinner again, nothing fancy just some fajitas. Opening the bottle of wine I hear Damon come through the door. He calls out my name to s
ee if I’m here. I’m here alright.
“In here,” I reply as he walks through the kitchen door. He looks taken aback when he sees the table set with candles and I know he thinks this is a date. Exactly what I was going for.
“I just wanted to say thank you for letting me stay.” The words come out in a rush and a smile plays on Damon's lips.
“Sit down, Damon, or if you need a minute I can serve it out and keep it in the warmer?”
Damon shrugs out of his jacket, loosens his tie, and opens the top buttons of his shirt before getting comfortable. I look at him in awe. Everything he does is flawless, even when it comes to making love. Wait, we don’t make love we fuck. I’ll admit we fuck well, but still that’s all it is.
Just the thought of Damon pounding into me, whilst I writhe beneath him, makes my blood hot. I shake my head to get rid of the image of Damon above me, fucking me. I’ll miss the physical side of him when this all ends.
I serve him his plate of food before taking a seat myself. A massive smile breaks out on his face.
“What?”I look at him puzzled.
“You made my favourite food, how did you know?” Shit I forgot about that. I quickly think of an excuse.
“It’s mine too. Is it ok?”
He smiles and takes a huge mouthful, speaking while still eating. “It’s good. Thank you.”
I sit down and we slip back into the comfortable silence we’ve become used to over the past few days. When we finish, I stand and carry the plates to the dishwasher but Damon takes them from me and directs me to the living room
“Go sit, relax,” he tells me and taps me on the bum as he pushes me through the door. It immediately sets something on fire inside me. Just that one simple touch has my body thrumming with need.
Sitting in the living room, the friction of the seam in my shorts is pressing my thong against my swollen bud. It’s enough to make me want to scream. I bring my hands up to cup my breasts. They’re heavy and full, my nipples stiff and pebbled. It’s not enough, all it does is increase my need to relieve the ache.
Listening to see if Damon is coming, I slide my hand down my stomach and into my shorts. As soon as my fingers touch my sensitive bud, I feel instant relief. My body feels on fire. I have been fighting to control this for too long. I need to find some way to get release without needing to involve Damon, but just the thought of my own hand or anyone other than Damon bringing me to orgasm is a disappointment.
The sensation taking over my body from just the soft touch I’m allowing myself makes my body quake. A small moan escapes my lips before I clamp my mouth shut, making sure to not let Damon know what I’m currently up to.
I close my eyes as I move my fingers down to my core. I push a finger inside me while moving my other hand to my hardened nipples, tugging on them. It sends an instant volt of pleasure to my already aching pussy. I’m so aroused I can smell myself. I begin panting as my body takes over, my hips rising of their own accord.
The thought of Damon catching me turns me on even more. It makes me feel naughty to know he’s just on the other side of the house, oblivious as to my ministrations. I push two fingers inside me thinking of him, remembering the way his hot tongue felt when he was plunging it inside me. I have to bite my lip to stifle another moan that is building in my throat. I can feel my climax peaking, reaching the pleasurable heights I need to push me over the edge.
I pluck my nipple before lifting and squeezing the weighty flesh. I continue thrusting my finger into my channel and bring my thumb up to press into my slickened bundle of nerves. I press harder until a complete wave of ecstasy overtakes my body, tremors making me arch my whole back off the couch as I come. I cry out, unable to hold back as a tidal wave of intense rapture spreads through my body, curling my toes.
Coming down from my high, I open my eyes and see Damon standing by the door. His eyes are filled with pure passion. I know he saw what I did but I’m too sated to even care. I can see his impressive bulge straining in his trousers, looking like it’s trying to break free of its confined prison. He takes a step towards me but I jump to my feet, coming to my senses. I want to keep Damon filled with sensual longing but if he so much as touches me, I know my restraint will break. He just has that effect on me.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that here.” I practically bowl him over as I make a run to the door. His hand snaps out, preventing my exit. I bring my eyes up to look into his. I can see him struggling with what he wants to say. “Damon, let me leave,” I plead, he moves his arm and I make my escape, rushing up the stairs and into my room.
Sitting down on the bed I wrap my arms around myself. What the fuck was I thinking to do that knowing Damon could walk in at any minute? It takes me a second to catch my breath. I hear Damon walk to my door. There is a small knock. “Ella? It’s ok, really.” I suck in a shocked breath, It’s not ok though. That was too close. If Damon had decided to walk over and help me finish I would have jumped and humped then and there. I ignore him and walk towards the bathroom turning on the shower and closing the door so I can no longer hear what he has to say.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
May 24th 2014
Things between Damon and I have been relatively easy. It’s like the whole catching me while pleasuring myself hadn’t happened. I for sure wasn’t going to mention it again, and Damon has surprised me by being blasé about the whole issue.
I’m down in Damon's pool doing a few lengths waiting for him to come home. I‘ve been bored all day, watching the clock for each hour until he walks through the door. I can’t figure out when I became so dependent on him, but I can’t deny I’m starting to like the way it felt having someone to talk to. It’s been nice.
Lost in my own thoughts, I hadn’t noticed that Damon is now in the water with me, so it completely takes me by surprise when I crash into his hard, broad chest as he leans against the wall. Looking up from the water I give him a seductive smile “Hi,” I all but purr at him. His returning smile spreads across his face, almost flooring me.
Damon moves towards me and I think he is going to kiss me, when he snakes his arms around my waist, but instead he dunks me under. Being unprepared, I swallow, trying to get air into my lungs. I start to kick out, the arms holding me let me go, and I swim to the side coughing and spluttering. A second later Damon pulls himself out of the water coughing too.
“You fucking moron, you could have killed me.” I climb out and lie on my back while trying to steady my breathing. I can see Damon trying to do the same thing, I turn my head to look at him and he looks in pain.
“Hey, are you ok?” He nods his head while clutching his manhood. That’s when it hits me. What I have done.
“Oh my god, I’m so sorry. Did I kick you in your...” he nods his head and I have to bite my lip to stop myself from laughing. Damon looks up at me and a smile breaks out on his face. A giggle erupts from me.
“You know what, beauty? That’s the first time I’ve seen you genuinely smile since you’ve been here.”
I look up at him in surprise, “What do you mean? I smile all the time.” He takes my hand in his, entwining our fingers, my breath catches as I look into his eyes.
“No Ella, you have the smile you want the world to see, and then you have the one that was just on your face, the one that reaches your eyes. I have only seen it one other time and that was when you were looking at Tom. I vowed I would try and do anything I could to get you to smile at me like that. Who knew all it took was a kick in the balls?”
The shock I feel at his words surprises me. I haven’t realised he was paying as much attention to me as he was. I need to take a moment to get my thoughts together so I stand up and jump back into the water, diving in as gracefully as I can.
After a moment Damon climbs back in and we start to mess about, playing water polo. He is so good he gets the ball off me nearly every time I try to shoot. It doesn’t surprise me seeing as he is so good at everything else.
I love how carefree
he can be. It makes me feel at ease, like we can just be around each other and nothing else matters. I like being around him. When we just hang out it’s nice, comforting.
Swimming back over to the edge, I climb out and sit on the side, watching as Damon starts to swim. After a few lengths he stops and swims towards me. I prepare myself for him to pull me in this time but he doesn’t. Instead he pushes my legs apart, pulling me closer to the edge so he can stand between them. He wraps his arms around my hips and rests his head against my stomach.
I feel confused having him here like this. He seems vulnerable. I should be happy, but I’m not. I feel like for a second he just needs this... contact. He holds onto me like I’m keeping him afloat, like I’m his lifeline. I’m not. The water is doing all the work. I like this. I shouldn’t, and I know I shouldn’t, but I do.
Damon lets go of my waist and asks if I want a drink. I nod my head, still unsure if I can stand yet, my legs feel like jelly at the intimate moment we just shared. I can see it in his eyes, it meant something to him. Fuck, it meant something to me. But what?
Damon heads over to the lounger to lie down, the drinks he made us placed down on the side table. He doesn’t take his eyes off me so I slowly stand up and walk over. I go to sit down then I feel his hand in mine. He pulls me gently, letting me know he wants me on the lounger bed with him.
I lay down on top of him, and my cheek is pressed against his strong chest. I can hear his heartbeat, it’s strong and fast. I know me being this close is affecting him. His arms come around me and his hand rests on the top of my head.
His fingers slowly stroke my hair. He is so gentle with me, caressing me like I’m made of glass. Like I’m fragile and he wants to protect me. Doesn’t he realise I’m not the one that needs protecting?
My thought jars me. It doesn’t sit well with the part of me that has these feelings for him. Those parts war inside of me, and I don't know which will win at this moment in time. All I know is, laying here with him like this, for the first time in a long time, I don’t feel so alone.
Corrupted (Manipulation Trilogy #1) Page 8
