Lanier waited until her mother was seated before she sat down next to her. Wringing her hands together, she thought of the most important questions to ask first.
Barbara hated seeing Lanier struggling this way. “You can ask me anything. I’ll give you the truth. I owe you that much, Lanier.”
“I guess I just want to know…why? Why did you allow me to stay in the foster care system? Why didn’t you come back for me or come to visit me wherever I was?”
Barbara folded her hands. “So much went on back then. Your dad and I were locked up for a short time because we didn’t have money to post bail. I didn’t know where they’d taken you. When I did find out, I didn’t go see you right away…and you were gone from there by the time I visited. The cycle of finding you had to start all over again.”
Lanier’s eyes blurred with tears. “Why didn’t you ever find me?”
“I stopped trying. Just like your dad, I was an addict. It numbed the horrific pain but only for a brief time. Joseph was abusing alcohol before you were taken. He wanted me to have a drink with him or hit a joint, and I did it because I wanted to keep him home. I feared he’d get himself killed hanging out in the streets. I had forsaken all that I was and all that I had to keep my marriage intact. After I began using frequently, I no longer considered you, period. That’s a terrible thing for a mother to say to her only child, but it’s the truth.”
Lanier could only stare at her mother. The truth hurt way more than she’d thought it would, yet she was glad it had been told. All the fear she’d had about being a mother was still with her, but she knew she’d never mistreat a child. Abandoning her flesh and blood was out of the question.
“So drugs and alcohol meant more to you than I did, the baby you birthed?”
“Your dad meant more to me than anything in this world. I was out there with him because I loved him more than life. Did I make wrong choices? You bet.”
The words Barbara had spoken cut into Lanier’s heart like a surgeon’s scalpel. “It’s nice that you can admit it, but it doesn’t do me a lot of good.”
“None of what I’ve done has done you any good. Every choice I made was wrong. You should’ve come first in my life. I only missed you when I became clean and sober. It was then that I realized what I’d done to you. It still took me a long time to come to terms with it enough to try and see you. Saying I’m sorry will never be enough, but I am terribly sorry.”
Lanier’s tears spilled over. Her face was wet, but she didn’t wipe it. “Your honesty hurts more than I imagined. At least you’ve been truthful. Why did Dad start using?”
“Losing his job to someone younger was a strain on him. It was difficult to work under someone you’d supervised. The first odd thing I noticed was him drinking beer, something he’d never bothered with. He quickly graduated to wine and on to hard liquor. I honestly can’t tell you when the drugs started because he was drinking at the same time. I do recall the first time he asked me to smoke—”
Lanier held up her hand in a halting gesture. “I don’t need to know the name of the substances you abused. It won’t change a thing. You’ve told me why you chose your husband over me. That’s enough for me to get used to. Mom, you have no idea what horrific treatment I received in foster care. I experienced horrible nightmares, but I’m not there anymore. I’m an adult, a successful one. I have a master’s degree in social work. That’s my truth.”
“I’m proud of you, Lanier. You’re doing very well and I’m happy for you. Don’t let what your father and I did keep you bitter. You are your own woman. You get to call all the shots in your life. I never had it like that until recently. I counted on your father for everything. When it looked like I was losing him, I joined him to keep him.”
Wrapping her arms around Barbara’s neck, Lanier hugged her tightly. “I still don’t understand how you did it, but you’ve obviously come to terms with yourself. If God can forgive you, who am I not to? Forgiveness doesn’t necessarily mean we’ll have this great relationship, but I’m willing to try.”
Barbara squeezed her daughter. “Thank you, sweetheart. We need you in our lives.”
Lanier suddenly pulled away. “To be honest, I don’t know if I can have a relationship with Joseph. I blame him more than anyone. If he hadn’t started using, we may not have been forced apart. I try hard to remember he’s my father, but I can’t recall anything good about him.”
“That’s ’cause bad stuff overshadows good. He is a good man, even if you only remember him as an addict. Right after our court date for the divorce, he asked me to have lunch with him. I couldn’t resist him. I still can’t.”
Lanier appeared confused. “What happened after that?”
“We saw each other off and on for about a year before we remarried. We both went through rehab on our own, long before any court date. Please, Lanier, don’t be too hard on him. He’s very aware of his wrongdoings, and he wants a relationship with his daughter. Take all the time you need to think it over. Joseph is back to being the kind, considerate man I fell in love with. I’m sorry you can’t remember him like that.”
“I’m sorry, too, Mom. I’m not closing the door on him, but there’s only a fraction of a crack left open. It may or may not widen enough for him to enter. We have to wait and see. You came for lunch, and I cooked a great meal. Let’s eat.”
“Are you sure you want me to stay, Lanier?”
“I’m positive. I hope you’ll love what I fixed.”
“I’m sure I will. Want to give me a hint what it is?”
Lanier’s lashes lowered momentarily. “Remember my favorite when I was younger?”
“Cubed steak and gravy.”
Grateful that Barbara had remembered, Lanier smiled and nodded.
During the road trip, Dallas’s team had won the coveted pennant race for the American League’s Central Division. A huge party in their honor was to take place on a Saturday evening on the second weekend in October. The festivities would be held on a huge Texas estate belonging to the owner of the Hurricanes. Dallas had invited Lanier as his date, and his family was also attending.
Seated in a leather recliner in his family room, Dallas had mail scattered all about him. He had arrived home a couple of hours ago. Getting through the mail was a chore he hated, so he tackled it first. He picked up yet another pink envelope, wondering what she had to say now.
He sighed with disinterest as he read the latest note from her. The scent on the envelope didn’t turn him on in the least, and he wasn’t impressed with anything she’d written. It scared the daylights out of him when he read that the day they would be meeting was close at hand. He’d have to alert security not to let anyone inside the gates but the people who were already on his visitors list. The mystery woman’s threat of a visit had gotten to him.
A lightbulb suddenly came on inside his head. Tossing the note aside, he got up from the recliner and strode back to his bedroom. Picking up his wallet and car keys, and moving rather quickly, he headed for the garage. He pressed a remote to the garage door, fired up the engine and backed his car out.
Casey was at her desk when Dallas walked in. A couple occupied chairs in front of her desk, so he began looking at the complex model on the wall. There weren’t many home sites left. He was aware that Lanier had scrapped her plans to purchase the town house because of Casey’s intrusion into her personal life.
Dallas had had mixed emotions about Lanier moving away from Haven House. More than anything, he wanted to marry Lanier and have her move into his home. Or they could rent out his place and pick out a new residence together. But if they weren’t of one accord, marriage and a home together wasn’t happening.
Fifteen minutes had lapsed when Casey walked up beside Dallas. She gave him a gleaming smile. “It’s nice to see you. How are you?”
“Just fine, than
k you. I won’t stay long. I came to see if you’re really ready to reveal yourself. Your last note seems that you are.”
Casey’s face lit up like a Christmas tree. “How did you guess?”
“Oh, a few things helped me figure it out. Why did you feel you had to resort to that odd method?”
“I don’t know. It seemed like an intriguing way for you to get to know me better.”
“You’d met me. I’ve been here several times already. I came alone the first time. The next time I brought along the woman I’m crazy about, the woman I plan to marry.”
Casey looked as if she wished she could disappear. “Are you truly in love with Lanier?”
“Oh, you have no idea how much I love her. What made you think you could come between us?”
“Don’t you think you deserve more than what she can give you? She seems cold.”
A vein throbbed in Dallas’s neck. “How do you know what she can or can’t give me?”
“I’ve seen how timid she is. She acts like she’s scared of her own shadow. Are you attracted to weakness? If so, Lanier is perfect for you. But I don’t think she’s what you want. You’re too strong of a man to want an emotionally weak woman.”
Dallas’s eyes glowed with hot flames of anger. “Casey Rayburn, you may think you get us, but you don’t. Do you like your job?”
“I love my job. It pays extremely well. I invest a lot of what I make in real estate. By my fortieth birthday, I plan to retire a millionaire.”
“Sounds to me like you suffer from the pronoun I. Do you want to keep this job?”
Trying to ignore his cutting insult, Casey rolled her eyes. “Of course I want to keep it. Why wouldn’t I?”
“If that’s the case, you need to stop sending those little notes. You used my private information for your sick pleasure. I don’t give my phone number and my address out to just anyone. I’m sure the ‘powers that be’ at your company don’t sanction criminal behavior from employees.”
“Criminal? Oh, please, you can’t be serious!” She paused. “You’d take this situation to corporate? I can’t believe you’d want me to lose my job.”
“No more than you want me to lose the woman I love. If Lanier saw those notes, she wouldn’t understand, and if she knew they came from you, you’d need to find a good hideout. Lanier is not someone you want to mess with. She’d be within her rights to let you have it.”
Casey choked back her tears and disappointment. “I’m sorry…Dallas.”
“Mr. Carrington to you—and please don’t forget it. Consider yourself warned. If anything out of the ordinary happens again, you’re the first person I’ll blame. Since you’ve already lost the sale with Lanier, you’d better be thankful for that miracle.”
“She walked out on our deal. When I finally got a hold of her, I asked her to consider changing her mind about the purchase. She said, ‘No sale,’ then hung up on me. That should tell you everything. I’m sorry I lost a commission check, but maybe it’s for the best. It’d be hard to see you and her around the property.” She threw up her hands at his stern look. “Just being honest.”
Fuming inside, Dallas turned on his heels and walked out.
Outside, where a cool evening breeze stirred mildly, Dallas stopped to catch his breath. He’d had enough of Casey Rayburn. It seemed as if she’d starting setting him up from the first day he’d visited the complex.
Whether to tell Lanier about Casey’s notes weighed heavily on him. His lady had a hot temper and her buttons were easily pushed. He didn’t think she’d physically harm anyone, but her tongue was dangerous. He’d given Casey good advice when he’d said that Lanier was not someone to mess with. It was up to Casey to heed the warning.
Dallas understood women being attracted to him, but there was no excuse for anyone to take a crush this far. Casey wasn’t his type of woman. He wouldn’t have dated her even if he hadn’t been in love with Lanier. Dallas couldn’t believe he hadn’t suspected Casey long before now.
Making sure his Bluetooth was turned on, he punched in the number for Haven House. He was hoping he could see Lanier this evening.
“Hey, beautiful, it’s me. I made it back home a few hours ago. What’re you up to?”
Enchanted by Dallas’s voice, Lanier smiled. “Welcome home! I’m stretched out reading a good novel. What’s up with you?”
“Calling to find out if I can drop by to see my favorite girl.”
“I’d love to see you. Have you eaten yet?”
“I grabbed a bite to eat with a few of the guys right after we landed. I can be there in about twenty minutes or so. Need anything?”
“Just you. See you soon, Dallas.”
“Goodbye, sweetheart.”
As soon as Lanier hung up the phone, it rang again. Thinking Dallas was calling back, she rapidly picked up the receiver. “Hey.”
“Miss Watson, this is Casey Rayburn. I’m calling because I just had a talk with Dallas. I found it strange that he wasn’t sure if you’re purchasing a home with me or not. What’s that about?”
“Casey, I made myself clear to you. I didn’t purchase a town house in your complex because of your unprofessional behavior.”
“You didn’t change your mind because of Dallas, did you?”
Lanier frowned. “Again, what does Dallas have to do with it?”
“Everything! I guess he hasn’t told you about the countless passes he’s made at me. It started the first day he came in to see our models. We’ve been exchanging flirtatious emails and intimate notes and texts ever since. If you haven’t gotten wind of it, you got it now.”
Lanier’s eyes filled with rage. “You’ve got to be crazy, lady, if you expect me to believe the crap you’re spewing out. I know Dallas a lot better than you give me credit for. If he were interested in any other woman, he’d be honest about it right away.”
“You think so, huh? Ask him about our flirtatious exchanges. If you know him so well, you’ll know whether he’s lying or not. Sorry to burst your bubble, but your man is not exclusively yours. Tell Dallas hello for me.” Knowing she’d said more than enough to boil Lanier’s blood, Casey disconnected.
Looking dumbfounded, Lanier just lay there on her bed, staring up at the ceiling.
Can I drop by to see my favorite girl?
Lanier replayed Dallas’s remarks in her head several times over. If she wasn’t his girl, he surely had made a fool of her. All this time he’d made her believe they were exclusive.
If Casey is telling the truth, it means that Dallas has been lying to me. No, he’s not that kind of guy. Casey is just trying to pull another fast one. Losing a sale isn’t anything to take lightly. No sale, no commission.
Lanier didn’t know what to do. Should she confront Dallas with Casey’s tale or just let it slide? If he wasn’t guilty of anything, he’d think she didn’t trust him—and that anyone would be able to come between them. Dallas had worked hard on getting her to trust him. It didn’t make sense for him to betray her.
Getting up from the bed, Lanier went into the closet and pulled down a white sweater and a pair of eggplant-colored jeans. After tossing the clothing onto the bed, she stepped into the bathroom. Although she’d had a shower shortly before Dallas had called, she wanted to freshen up a bit.
A half hour later, Lanier was startled by the doorbell.
So many things had trooped through Lanier’s head while she’d been waiting for Dallas. One thing was for sure. If she said something accusatory, and he was innocent, she’d end up losing him. His patience had to be running thin with her.
Making her way to the door, Lanier felt sick to her stomach. Even if she believed wholeheartedly in Dallas, and she did, Casey had created issues for them. Asking Dallas about Casey without offending him would be hard.
Lanier opened the door to Dallas. He immediately drew her into his arms and kissed her forehead. No matter how much she believed in him, she still found herself asking if it could be true.
Dallas presented Lanier with a red rose. “It hasn’t fully bloomed yet.”
She put the rose up to her nose and inhaled its perfumed scent. “Thank you. It’s beautiful. Have a seat while I get a bud vase.”
Dallas instantly sensed that something was wrong with Lanier. Her voice was shaky. When he’d held her, her body had trembled. Instead of continuing to analyze her, he went into the family room. Whatever it was it would come to light.
Filling the vase with water, Lanier centered the rose. She inhaled its scent again. How many nights had she dreamed of following a trail of rose petals that led to the man of her dreams?
Lanier was a dreamer, but she could also be a realist. And reality could hurt.
Dallas’s eyes were closed when Lanier returned. Instead of disturbing him, she studied him closely. He was a fine male specimen. His ebony eyes had told her so many things, including how much he loved her. Those strong, toffee-brown arms had held her tight, keeping her safe and secure. His juicy lips brought her pleasure each time they united with hers. As her eyes dropped down, she gasped, remembering the feel of his manhood deep inside her.
To hell with Casey Rayburn.
Until Dallas gives me a reason to believe he’s cheating on me, no one will run me off. I love him more than I ever dreamed possible. And my instincts tell me he loves me every bit as much as I love him. It’s possible he loves me even more than I think.
Lanier quietly backed out of the room and went upstairs.
After retrieving the silk nightgown and robe Kelly had given her, Lanier stripped out of her clothes, replacing them with the hot, sexy gift. She let down her hair and brushed it briskly so it would fall about her shoulders. She sprayed her neck and other pulse points with her favorite perfume. She slipped her satin slippers on and went back downstairs.
Tempted by a Carrington Page 14
