Because Beards
Page 50
“You don’t need to—“I begin, but he quiets me with a domineering glance. His glare keeps my mouth sealed for the remainder of our walk. I’d never admit it, but that look is smoldering, and I find it far too hot to be scared of it.
Finn squeals and jumps up and down the second his eyes lock on Rhett. He rushes his tiny body out of the window and to the door in a flash. Finn knows better than to open it without Ms. Honey, but I can hear the excited patter of his feet on the other side.
Ms. Honey swings the door open with the most innocent of smiles. Innocent she is not, but dang it if she doesn’t pull it off. “Well, hello, dear!” Her pearly whites are aimed directly up at Rhett’s breathtaking face, putting on a show for him. Women, no matter their age, can never resist him. “You sure did make it here in no time!” Ms. Honey applauds him.
Not able to wait any longer, Finn wrenches his little body forward and wraps himself completely around one of Rhett’s long, muscular legs. He greets him with his typical baseball in one hand and glove on the other. Rhett keeps him in a steady supply of both. Finn looks up to him. He’s his hero, plain and simple.
Rhett immediately pries Finn from his leg, picking him up and hugging him tightly to his body. The sight does things to my chest that I don’t have words for. These two men have my heart. One knows it, the other doesn’t.
Once dislodged from Rhett’s chest, Finn runs his fingers across Rhett’s beard. “It tickles,” he grins at him. Rhett knows this is his cue to lean forward and rake his beard across Finn’s soft little cheeks. Giggling ensues, and Finn is still laughing when Rhett lowers him to the floor. He skips away happily, looking for his shoes.
With Finn gone, Rhett redirects back to Ms. Honey. “I left as soon as I got your call.”
“I can see that.” She eyes his practice uniform up and down from behind her glasses, and the appreciation there is not to be missed. It makes me laugh, but I’m able to cover it by looking away toward where Finn has disappeared. The inappropriateness of her action does not stop the flirty smirk that immediately forms on the older lady’s lips.
Ms. Honey is nothing short of a walking piece of history. A sweet and sassy blast from the nineteen sixties. Her pants are largely polyester and her glasses definitely lend themselves toward the cat-eye phenomenon of that decade. The bouffant bun that her hair is never without could probably withstand hurricane force winds. She’s nosy, and talks more than she listens, but I’m grateful for her presence each and every day. It’s nice to have someone who I know sincerely cares about Finn and I who lives so close by. She always keeps tabs on the two of us, even though she acts as if she doesn’t.
I clear my throat pointedly, my hand flying back to my hip. “And just when did the two of you exchange numbers?” My eyes shoot from Ms. Honey back to Rhett, not sure who I should focus on.
Rhett looks shyly away, knowing that I don’t like for anyone to intrude on my behalf, he knows what he’s going to say won’t be well received by me. Staring a little too intently at a leaf on a potted plant by the door, he fiddles with it between his thumb and forefinger. “I left my number for her a long time ago. You know, in case you ever needed something.”
My mouth is poised to argue, when Rhett stops his inspection of the leaf. “What if there was an emergency? She needed someone that she could get ahold of. It helps me worry less about the two of you when I can’t be here.” Innocent eyes sweep first to Ms. Honey, and then back to mine. The sexy vulnerability on his face is something I can’t resist. Honestly, after that last part of his argument, how can I be mad?
In lieu of saying anything at all, I roll my hazel eyes. If nothing else, I need to be polite to Ms. Honey for taking time to watch Finn, and even for calling Rhett, no matter how misguided that may have been. She did it with the best of intentions—I think.
“Thank you for calling Rhett.” I politely hug her. “And for watching the little one.” My hand finds Finn’s shoulder as he scampers back my way, ready to go.
Ms. Honey gives me a wink, reaching towards Finn, her arms spread wide. “Give Honey a hug! And tell me you’ll miss me!”
Finn launches in to her arms, wrapping himself tightly around her neck. I worry that he’ll hurt her, but she seems to enjoy every second of it. “I’ll miss you!” he nearly shouts.
“Promise to wave to me from the sky!” Ms. Honey shoos him out the door toward Rhett and I.
“I promise!” His bellow is only eclipsed by the massive wave he gives her. Pulling on my hand, Finn forces me into a slow jog toward the parking lot.
Rhett follows in an easy stride, his legs carrying him much quicker than my shorter ones.
Finn’s pace speeds up, causing me to reach desperately behind me to grab Rhett’s hand, before we leave him in our dust. His hand is already outstretched, anticipating this very thing. Our fingers glide together to form a strong grip, one that sends warmth running up my arm and into my chest.
Finn’s giggles are infectious when he catches a glimpse of the human chain that Rhett and I have formed behind him. His little legs come to an abrupt stop when he gets close to Rhett’s truck, nearly causing me to collide with him. My feet skid before I stumble and almost lose my balance.
From behind, Rhett wraps his powerful arm around my waist; his hand fanning out on my lower stomach. His grip is strong, and with my back pressed tightly to his front, I can feel every hard inch of him. Those practice pants leave nothing to the imagination. Suddenly, I’m breathing harder than I want, and it has nothing to do with the short jog. Rhett notices. The pressure of his hand increases and pulls me further in to him. His breath closes in on my neck, sending chills through me, even though with the sun beating down on us, I should have been burning up. Being close to Rhett is hard enough, but having this much contact with him sends my mind reeling until I don’t even know who I am. Because even with this simple touch, I’m not Hannah, I’m his. Always his.
I swear I feel the lightest touch of Rhett’s lips to my neck just as Finn’s excited chatter lulls me from the obscene pull Rhett always has over my senses. “I’m ready,” he announces, jumping up and down next to the door of the mammoth truck, breaking my concentration.
Rhett’s hand loosens from its protective grip allowing me to step away. Always stepping away. Always trying to do what’s right. It’s exhausting. I can’t look Rhett in the eyes, so I focus on Finn.
Luckily, Finn’s love of Rhett’s truck has kept him preoccupied and oblivious to what’s happening. The massive vehicle is intimidating, just like the man who drives it. From its blacked out paint to the lift that makes it look like a 4x4 on steroids, the quad cab behemoth suits Rhett perfectly.
He opens the back passenger door, lifting Finn into the booster seat he keeps in there. He pulls the seatbelt out and around him, letting Finn buckle it himself. Rhett eases his body in the door, very close to Finn, and murmurs a few quiet words to him. After a small nod from his tiny face, Rhett backs up. “Love you, buddy. Be good for your aunt. Okay?”
“I will,” Finn promises. “Love you, too.”
Rhett closes the door before turning on me. I already started the truck and have the a/c cranked on high. He brushes his thumb across my cheek. There’s nothing he can say to make this hard moment better. “I’ll be here when you get back.”
I nod. It’s all I can do.
Climbing in the truck, I melt into the leather seats while I watch him walk away. Rhett exudes power in every action. Even in the sweeter moments he and I have shared through the years, he’s always in control. It frustrates him that I fight that control. He wants nothing more than to save me, but I know I need to save myself. I think he realizes that too, but dang it if it doesn’t wear on him. I can see it now, in the way his normally broad shoulders slump ever so slightly as he makes his way off the hot parking lot and onto the sidewalk.
His frame, his persona, his shine, it’s all larger than life, and much too big for this apartment complex. But here he is anyway, looking decidedly out
of place. For me.
Pushing all of the problems of the last few hours aside, I take in his retreating form, from his long powerful legs to the way that baseball uniform clings to his perfect backside. It’s little wonder all of the sports and fitness magazines have been beating down his door for the last few years since he hit the big time. They’d be crazy not to. His agent persuaded him to take part in more than Rhett really wants to. He’s one who usually shuns the limelight, but it’s smart business to get as much endorsement and spotlight as he can, for as long as he can, and he understands that.
He doesn’t live an extravagant lifestyle, though he certainly can afford to. He does have a beautiful home in Scottsdale, near a gorgeous golf course, with more rooms than he really needs. He’s offered for Finn and I to come live there so many times I’ve lost count. As nice of an offer as it is, I don’t think I could stand to watch girls coming and going, nor would I want to explain that to Finn. I can’t help but wonder if he really wants us there, or if he simply feels obligated to offer. It’s been easier to stay put and not delve in to any of it. So that’s what I’ve done.
Wanting to stay lost in this mirage of perfectly toned man instead of my actual reality and sad moment of taking my son to the airport, I slowly close my eyes, and let his form burn in to my brain for a moment longer. I remind myself that I can get through this goodbye, and then while Finn is off having fun, I can get our current mess straightened out before he returns home. I’m not sure where I’ll find the energy because I’m burning both ends of the candle these days, but I always find a way. And I’m not going to stop now.
Dragging myself back up to my apartment after leaving half of my heart at the airport, exhaustion and gloom engulf me. I’ve never spent time away from Finn before, and while I have piles of stuff to keep me busy, I’m so used to going non-stop and having his perfect little face peeking in and out of every aspect of my life, I honestly don’t know what I’ll do for the next few weeks. My sister swears I’ll be fine, and that I need some time alone to just be me. Usually she’s right, but this time, I’m not sure. I’m still struggling with the notion that maybe I’ve made a mistake in letting him go, when I open my apartment door.
The silence that meets me is odd. Rhett’s a busy guy. Always moving, always planning, constantly in motion. I wonder if he’s left?
“Rhett?” I call out, ducking my head around the wall that separates the living room from the kitchen, checking to see if he’s in there. I’m seconds away from texting him when I wander in to my room. His strong form lays motionless in my bed, fast asleep. The deep rise and fall of his chest means he’ll be out for a few hours more, at least. He doesn’t settle down to sleep very often, but when he does, you can set a bomb off next to him and he won’t wake up. “The Prince sleeps,” I mutter to myself, amused.
My eyes roam from his prominent jawline dusted with soft bristles to his chiseled golden brown abs, and land on the small towel wrapped around his waist. A quiet laugh escapes my lips. Those towels envelope Finn’s small body, and work for me, but barely cover him. The opening slit of the towel faces the front, running the length of his tanned and toned thigh, and up towards his waist. If he shifts just slightly, he’ll be exposed to the world. Knowing a girl can only deny herself so much temptation, I pull my quilt up and over him to his chest.
Rhett settles further into the sheets, relaxing into the softness. His large frame makes my bed look miniature. Before I even register what I’m doing, I’m sitting on the edge of it, staring like a creeper. I can’t help it. He’s generally so busy, and there are very few times that he remains still. And even fewer times where I let myself take him in completely like this. I discovered years ago I can only take so much of it. He’s perfect, truly, and not only on the outside. He’s perfect on the inside, too. Well, at least for me. I’m sure there’d be a line of girls who would tell you differently. Ones who undoubtedly feel scorned by him. Several are bitter, because Rhett’s the kind of guy who makes every girl want more. But he never wants more with any of them. It doesn’t win him any fans. They all think they’ll be the girl to make him want a commitment. And each and every one of them is crushed when he doesn’t. I never want to be one of those girls.
Easing off the side of the bed, I dance my fingers through his short dark beard, and up into the hair above his ear. After the long day, I’d like to crawl into the bed with him, but I know I shouldn’t. Besides he doesn’t have any spare clothes here, so I need to wash his practice uniform so he’ll have something clean to wear home.
Hours pass while I troll around my apartment trying to keep myself busy. I don’t exactly work quietly, and our old washer is noisy, but he sleeps through it all.
On my final pass through my bedroom to stack clean towels in the linen closet, Rhett’s sleeping form springs up like a jack-in-the-box. He loops his large palm around my wrist and yanks me toward him before wrapping his other arm around my waist. I’m pulled over him and into the empty space next to him, all in one swift move. Rhett’s lying atop of me before I can even fight back.
I scream. And not a normal scream, either. This one is high pitched and full of fright. Which, of course, only adds to his amusement. My much smaller hand lands a smack to his bare chest. He loves that I’m so much more petite than him. It makes holding me against my will that much easier. I’d like to say it doesn’t happen often, but it does. Reaching for my palm, he brings it to his lips, kissing it.
“You scared me,” I chide.
He only laughs harder.
“Seriously!” Feigning more anger than I feel, I push at his chest. He’s not budging, and he’s really enjoying himself, so there’s no way I’m putting an end to this until he’s good and ready. He’s always in control.
“Really? I couldn’t tell.” He winks down at me with his stupid, smug, perfect smile plastered on his stupid, smug, perfect face. He mocks me by impersonating my scream, high pitched squeal and all.
My eyes roll out of habit because it’s all I have at the moment, and now I’m trying not to laugh.
He shifts his hips, a small move, but it’s then that realization hits me. He’s still in a towel, mostly naked, on top of me. Without a doubt, my face registers my sudden awareness, and Rhett, ever vigilant of my expressions, immediately catches on.
I watch his own awareness rush through him, and though I fight hard to keep the thoughts from entering my head, I can’t help it. It feels so good to lay here, with his weight on me, in my bed, laughing. All of it. It feels right.
Before I can stop myself, I dance the very tips of my fingers through the beard that covers his cheek, up the side of his face and in to his hair, just as I had earlier.
“Hannah,” he breaths through an exhale, reverently, his full lips capturing my attention.
His eyes smolder, and he shifts his hips again, this time intentionally, as though he can’t stop himself.
My body takes over, my eyes shutting of their own accord in pleasure. A light gasp escapes my lips when his movement hits me where I need him the most. My back arches in the slightest, wanting to feel him more than I care to admit, or have him know.
Like a fast moving storm, his lips are on my neck, layering kisses that fall in a steady line leading directly to my own. I do nothing to stop it. Tilting my head to the other side, I give him room to work. The brush of his beard and the wetness of his tongue overload my senses. I only tip my head back in his direction when I know his lips are nearly to my own, and I need to feel them more than I need anything else right now.
The kiss doesn’t start out gently like the one we shared years before, but hard and absolutely weighed down with rampant desire and yearning. Longing that’s built up over years of denying myself. He may have been the one who started this kiss, but I want it just as much, and there’s no denying it.
I press my chest up, needing every inch of our bodies to connect. My legs wrap around his waist in an instant, and by then it’s too late.
Rhett’s roug
h hands push my shirt up, his tongue running a line from my belly button all the way to my breasts. I’m shivering when my shirt vanishes. I don’t even register that action because after years of dreaming about the kiss we shared, all I know is I need his mouth on mine again, and I need it now.
Placing my hands on either side of his face, I pull him urgently to me, straining to connect my face with his. He obliges all too willingly, falling back in to me, his weight hitting me in all the right spots. I moan, rolling my head on the pillow, before Rhett’s lips find my own.
I latch on to them, my need for him almost embarrassing, but I just don’t care. I’m too far gone. After years of thinking I’d never feel them again, I can’t get enough.
Rhett makes an effort to slow down this erratic frenzy we’re both in. He knows all I want are his lips on mine, so instead he pulls his away infinitesimally, teasing me. I have no shame, so I search his out. His willpower must be as nonexistent as my own because it doesn’t take much for him to give me what I want. His lips graze mine tauntingly before they disappear and are replaced with his tongue. The very tip of it sweeps across my mouth, before he pulls his face just out of my reach again. I whine, needing him. His body trembles where it touches my own—a sign that the restraint he’s showing right now isn’t coming easy. However, true to Rhett, he’s found control and he’s holding on to it. Easing his mouth back to mine, he flicks his tongue across my top lip, never fully giving me his. It’s the sweetest torture I’ve ever known.
I break, so crazy with need I can’t think straight. My voice is unrecognizable when I cry out to him. “Rhett, please!”
Never able to deny me, the heat of his mouth is against my own almost immediately. He’s in control, as always, and now I know it.