by Alice Wade
“I needed to prove to you I’m just as capable. I felt you were holding me back because you thought me weak.” The shame in her words was clear, and they had an opposite effect on him. She expected him to sympathize with her and offer encouragements. Instead he attacked her with a violent flash of anger.
“I already felt that way!” he roared, charging forward with only a couch between them to halt his advance. The motion sent his hair forward to partially cover his smoldering hazel eyes that bore into her. He just stood there, shaking with rage as he glared at her before he found his voice. “I already trusted your abilities and counted you as one of the best we had. I held you back because I could not stand the thought of you getting hurt!” He stopped himself suddenly. Hanging his head, he tried to master his emotions, causing his nostrils to flare as he clenched his jaw. His hands repeatedly gripped the back of the couch as he battled for control, clearly losing the battle.
She took a tentative step back and watched him carefully. She had never seen him this angry. She heard his ragged breaths from where she stood and it terrified her.
“I loved you,” he whispered in a tortured voice. “I only wanted to keep you safe, and you defied me.” He looked up and his eyes filled with anguish dueled with her terrified green ones. “Now look where we are.”
Lainey cleared her dry throat. After a few painful seconds, she said, “And where is that?”
“Nowhere.” He gestured with his head towards her clasped hands. “I see my ring is gone? I get the message. What, are you some kind of slut who just removes it to please another man? Who are you exactly, Lainey? A whore?”
Those words traumatized her, but she couldn’t resist glancing down at the empty finger where his ring used to sit. How could he accuse her of doing such a thing regardless if she herself felt like a slut? He didn’t know her reasons and he wasn’t giving her a chance to explain. “Dace…”
“No!” he bellowed at her, shaking violently, “I don’t want to hear anymore of your lies. No more. You defied me and you got captured because of your arrogance. All I asked was for you to stay behind and now look at you.” He snorted, “You only proved me right. You destroyed all we’d worked towards in your one selfish act and you stand here and wonder why I’m angry? Now the Dûr Falas have rooted us out, Kaen knows my name, and we’re forced to make a move before we were ready.”
His normally youthful face contorted into a sneer, “The worst part in all of this is you cheated on me Lainey, and removed my ring.” Dace shook his head, both out of frustration and pain. His sneer turning to one of a deep and biting pain. “I can’t forgive you for that and I can’t be with you. You, of all people, should know how I feel about what you now are. I’ve only ever told you the full account of my parents and now this!” he exploded, quickly pulling back to collect his temper. Dace took a few deep breaths, closing his eyes from seeing her suffering. “You are not the woman I proposed to. That woman would never have done this to me. Does that answer your question?” He was being particularly cruel and blunt, cutting right to the heart.
She’d never felt such sorrow as in that moment. In addition, she was terrified. He was ending their relationship before she even had a chance to explain. Her wet eyes blinked repeatedly while the panic from this truth set in and she couldn’t breathe. He was abandoning her to deal with this alone, when what she really needed was time to adjust with the support of the one man who was supposed to love her. That wasn’t the Dace she knew. The man she loved was proud and valiant, and he would not have walked away this easily. Something profound drove this reaction but at the moment, Lainey couldn’t think straight. She needed to get away from him. Huge tears broke free and slid down her cheek. Dace witnessed without remorse.
“I…I had no idea you felt this strongly. I knew of your parents, but I thought you’d be able to move past it once you met Talon and Kailani. I have no intentions of making your life more difficult, so I’ll leave, Dace. I’ll leave.” She repeated and moved towards the door only to find his body blocking her desperate exit.
His accusing eyes bore into hers. His outstretched arm acted as the barrier she would need to break through to escape this painful conversation. She would need to touch him to do so and she wasn’t sure she could handle that at the moment. Lainey closed her eyes moaned silently to herself.
“No you won’t. You are part of this group, so you are entitled so stay.” He said bluntly before shaking his head to free himself of her spell of being this close. Just like yesterday, he warred with the urge to pull her into his arms and kiss her until that unbearable sadness was gone. Then he reminded himself this wasn’t the Lainey he loved and stormed off suddenly, leaving her confused and frightened in the doorway.
He slowed a few yards away and called out over his shoulder, “Just stay away from me.”
Lainey moved numbly over to a couch and sank into the stuffed cushions. She didn’t want to look at him. She needed to time to gather her thoughts especially since the conversation took such a turn that she couldn’t cope. She held it together until she heard his footsteps stomp down the hall and away from her.
She rolled into a tight ball on the couch, assaulted by the immense grief of her loss. Dace abandoned her and it felt as if all she had done was for naught. Her choice to save him seemed trivial now, and with each retreating footstep from Dace, another piece of her heart ripped away.
She sobbed loudly and wept until Talon arrived, breathless from running to her aid and gently collected her into his arms. She wasn’t aware of being lifted or the journey up three flights of stairs to a large living room with two bedrooms. He carried her straight to the second of the two and deposited her on the bed. There he brushed her hair away from her face and looked into her distraught face.
“What happened?”
“Dace.”
Talon cursed in a foreign language and kissed her forehead. “I’ll be right back. Please get settled and try to calm down. You are broadcasting your grief loudly, and it will draw attention.”
“I don’t know how to do that!” she wailed. Her ineptness at being a vampire set off a fresh wave of hysterics.
Kailani had followed and stood in the doorway, “Talon, go. I’ll see to this.”
She swiftly entered and settled onto the bed where Lainey lay in a ball. She affectionately rubbed her back as if comforting a terrified child. Talon nodded before he departed in search of Dace.
He found him finally in a room formerly used as a study or library. Now empty, its hundreds of shelves were barren. Dace stood quietly, staring at nothing but seething with anger.
“What did you think you were doing? I ordered you to stay away from her!” The elven vampire stalked him menacingly which caused Dace to flinch. That same cold sensation washed over him and he knew he was in dangerous territory. His survival instinct kicked in and adrenaline flooded his body. However, he remained calm.
When Dace finally turned, he challenged Talon with red and swollen eyes. Evidence of his grief streaked his face, but he stood his ground. Dace resisted a shudder as the pissed off vampire approached with a look that said he could kill him in one strike. “This is between me and Lainey. I can see her if I choose.”
“No, no you couldn’t. She’s vulnerable right now and your actions may have potentially damaged her!” His voice gradually rose with each word until he was snarling at the leader of the renegade group. “Not to mention you put this entire group in danger. She is untrained and broadcasting her grief in a wide radius. She’s effectively announcing to Kaen where she is!” His voice rose until he was hollering.
Dace’s eyes widened in surprise. “I, uh…”
“You fucked up. I didn’t ask you to avoid her out of kindness. Your reaction today caused her serious distress, and that…” he paused for emphasis, “…is unacceptable.” Talon stalked closer, “I thought we understood each other. She
must adjust to this slowly or her mind will shatter. Well done on assisting her progress in that regard. She’s quite stable at the moment,” Talon sarcastically growled before he advanced until he was close enough to touch Dace. He wanted nothing more than to beat the snot out of him. Instead he clenched his fists at his side to remain calm. “Just leave her alone until we can teach her the blocks.”
“I want nothing to do with her. She’s your problem now.” The anger he felt emerged in his voice.
Talon closed the gap and lifted Dace off the ground by his neck, tempted to snap it but this random assortment of people needed him. “What did you say to her?” He hissed violently.
“I ended our relationship,” he choked out between breaths.
Talon discarded him with an angry throw, sending the large blacksmith across the empty room to crash to the floor with a thud. “You bastard.”
Dace rubbed his neck and sat up. He watched with caution as Talon stalked towards the door and turned one last time in his direction. “I would kill you right now, but your people need you.”
He closed his cold blue eyes and when they opened, they blazed bright with a power that Dace had seen in the dungeon. “She needed you and you turned your back. I never took you for a coward, but that is what you are Dace Veridan. You are nothing but a coward.”
“That is not true and you know it!” he snapped in reply, ashamed to be thought that way at all.
“A coward,” Talon repeated. “An honorable man would have waited to hear her story. You’ve jumped to conclusions out of prejudice and destroyed what mental and emotional strength that woman had. If she loses control and I have to kill her, I’ll come after you. Just so we’re clear.” Talon didn’t wait for a reply but stormed back to his room.
Dace fell onto his back and remained there for quite some time before he was able to stand and make his way to his own room. What had he done? Was Talon right? Did he jump to conclusions and wrongly ended their relationship? A tortured growl emanated from his throat when he thought of the things he’d said to her just now. He’d actually called her a slut and a whore.
With utter despair and a shamed conscience, he sought out his bed and crawled under the covers without undressing. He felt the painful reminder that Lainey was gone because the bed felt empty and cold. Dace was consumed for the rest of the night as he felt the profound grief of losing the one woman he loved more than life.
* * * *
The next morning, Kailani waited for him just outside his door. Even though she was petite, the way she was leaning on the wall spoke of power and authority. She would not be turned away. “We need to talk.”
He was in a foul mood after spending a sleepless night missing Lainey. “I can’t right now. I have to go to a meeting downstairs. Can this wait?”
He really had no desire to talk with Kailani because he expected the same lecture he had received from Talon.
“No, this can’t wait. Get back inside.” Kailani pushed past him and entered his empty room.
The only reason Dace allowed her to treat him this way was because she was Talon’s mate. She was one reason Lainey remained alive and therefore she earned some respect in his eyes. He never forgot she was a vampire. He grudgingly had to admit that the more he talked with the beautiful woman, the more his hate for her faded.
Kailani stopped after entering and looked around the sparsely decorated room. She absently ran her open palms over her trousers, finally wrapping her hands around her waist, feeling the rough fabric of the plain white shirt she wore. All the remaining belongings Lainey had wanted salvaged were still in crates stacked in the corner untouched. The only furniture inside were a couch and two chairs. Other than that, the room was bare.
“Be quick. I’m needed downstairs.” He shut the door, careful to keep the lock unlatched in case he needed help.
“Talon is already informing them of the delay. So sit down and allow him time to join us.”
Dace shuddered inside. He didn’t want to meet with these two now. He knew what the topic would be. He had very little time to contemplate more before the door opened and Talon walked through.
After throwing the lock so they wouldn’t be disturbed, he turned to Dace, “It’s time you learned a few facts. Lainey has told us a little of her ordeal and one piece stands out important enough to share. It involves you. You will sit there and you will listen.” Talon spoke with the authority of one who expected his orders to be followed. With a last look to make sure Dace was listening, he moved to his mate’s side on the couch and sat down.
“Whatever it is, just get on with it,” Dace said snidely, causing both vampires to eye him with annoyance.
“Did I forget to mention that you should remain silent?” Talon added before turning to Kailani. “I think you should do the speaking, love. You were there with her.”
She nodded. “Dace, Kaen is cruel. Everyone knows this, but just how cruel is not understood by humans. He has been a menace for centuries, always staying one step ahead of those who wish him harm,” she indicated her and Talon with her hand. “It is unfortunate he ended up here, but here his is.”
She didn’t spare his feelings when she began, for this just needed to be said. “When she was brought in, she was terrified. Quade was weak. The moment Lainey recognized what I was, she immediately saw the opportunity to partner and get out of there. She offered herself to me. With her gift I was able to shield her mind, to hold it open to not resist Kaen. Those who resist die a horrible death.”
Dace leaned back on the chair defensively. His crossed arms a clear indication he wasn’t pleased to be sitting here. At the mention of Lainey’s offer, his eyes narrowed.
“She was courageous and strong. That courage saved her. It allowed me to protect her mind. Don’t you understand that?”
“Am I allowed to talk yet?” he asked childishly.
“No.” Talon answered. “Kailani continue.”
She sighed and collected Talon’s hand as she spoke, absently rubbing the back with her thumb. “Before they took her, I explained what was about to happen. There are many ways to convert a vampire, Dace. Many. The most common form used by Kaen is torture because he enjoys the fight. It’s a high for him. The other way is more peaceful and requires the victim to be nonresistant; however he has not used this in a very long time. I didn’t want her to experience the torture, so I compelled her to be nonresistant and entice him to treat her differently. It was a risk, but one I willingly took.”
She paused, looking at Talon for encouragement before she resumed. “He used mind control at first, that much I felt. She openly accepted it and didn’t resist. Kaen reacted as I hoped and showed her mercy, which left her mind intact. All of the newborns converted through torture are insane and must be terminated. Were you aware that there were over a hundred in the lowest part of that dungeon Talon destroyed?”
When Dace’s eyes widened and he shook his head, she continued. “Well, his monstrosities were destroyed yesterday, but Lainey wasn’t one of them mostly because I intervened. Last night I learned another piece of the puzzle. When Kaen converted her, he gave her a choice. One which involved making a sacrifice that included you.” Kailani pointed a finger in his direction, “You were the final link that helped her make up her mind.”
Dace couldn’t stay quiet any longer. “Are you saying I’m to blame for her being converted?” he challenged.
“No. Kaen gave her two choices: a painless conversion through sexual intimacy, or a less intimate process involving torture.” She cocked her head compassionately to the side before she continued, “She would have chosen torture Dace, if it weren’t for the ultimatum–.”
Dace boiled with jealous anger interrupting her forcefully, “—I don’t want to hear how she was unfaithful. It’s already been clarified how she whored herself out.”
Talon was off the
couch and slammed into Dace before the man knew what hit him. He was thrown to the floor from the punch where he sat stunned, rubbing his throbbing jaw. After a moment, he collected himself from the floor continuing to massage his chin. His eyes glared daggers at the vampires.
“You will filter your choice of words, Dace. She wasn’t a whore.” Talon’s voice was lethal. Satisfied Dace wouldn’t be stupid enough to say something else, he slowly returned to the couch.
Kai watched the men face off before Dace too sat back down. “May I finish please?” She was pleased that Talon felt protective, but at the moment it was disruptive. “The ultimatum was what decided her fate. It was fairly simple: if she chose torture, you would die; but if she chose intimacy, you lived,” she paused for effect. “Do you see now? It was for you, Dace. She’s not a slut or a whore or whatever vile name you want to call her.”
The color drained from Dace’s face. “That can’t be true.”
Kai nodded, confirming her words, “She loves you very much and would not want to be the cause for your death. You see her as unfaithful; I see her as courageous and brave.”
Dace was dumbstruck. He had nothing to say as he processed the information. He had it all wrong. There was a hard knot his throat that he attempted to clear by swallowing, but it wouldn’t go away. From what Kailani explained, it sounded true to what Lainey would do. She was selfless and would sacrifice herself to save those she loved. She was herself after all. He swallowed again and looked at the two vampires watching him; one with murderous intent and the other with compassion. The woman he loved was alive and well and he’d turned his back on her when she really needed him—all because his pride was wounded. Dace snorted suddenly. “Oh, what have I done?” he moaned, burying his face in his hands.
“You accused her of removing the ring. I wanted to clarify that as well,” Kailani watched Dace’s cheek twitch, and knew this was the true underlying source of his anger. He felt betrayed. “Kaen read from her mind that you were betrothed and removed the ring. He removed it because it signified a claim of another man.”
