He’d just “Duh’d” me, and I should’ve punished him since he knew that was a no-no, but at that particular moment it didn’t matter to me because relief took the place of his disrespectful dialogue. And worse, it was a selfish relief; I was more excited because Ian was still there.
Was it wrong to feel the way I did? Was I holding on to the knowledge that Ian desperately wanted me and I had that power over him?
My actions were wrong, and I needed to distance myself from him.
“Chelsie!”
“Chelsie!” he yelled again.
I shook my head and looked up from the sofa pillow I was adjusting to see his perturbed face. “Sorry, I had something on my brain.”
“Obviously. I called out several times.”
“What?” I continued to straighten the pillows on the couch and made no attempt at eye contact.
“What? What’s wrong with you?” His voice was gruff.
I turned and sat on the sofa. “I have a headache, and I didn’t sleep well last night.” Okay, part of what I said was true.
He took the chair across from me and crossed his long, lean legs at the knee, the layers of his dark hair shadowing part of his beautiful face. “That makes two of us.” This time his voice was almost a whisper.
A distinctive pause passed between us.
“Go to the movies with us?”
“I can’t, doctor’s orders. Something about bright lights and extreme visual movement.” I twisted my mother’s wedding band on my right hand repeatedly.
He uncrossed his legs and propped his elbows on his knees, pitching his body toward me. “Fine. We need time alone. You and I are going to have dinner together, and then we’re coming back here for what we both crave. Denise can keep the boys at my house after the movie. Get some rest, you’re going to need it.”
I stared him down. “You don’t order me around, and you don’t make decisions for me. Remember, you said.”
He stood and came within a few inches of me. When he took a single finger and lifted my chin up to face him, virile heat charged from his eyes, igniting every cell of my flesh.
“I dare you to deny you want this.”
I couldn’t. As hard as I tried to keep things friendly, a connection with him was building inside me like a typhoon, determined to destroy my peace and tranquility. How had we gone from exchanging cookies and recipes to fuck buddies?
I swallowed hard. “Okay.” My shoulders softened.
After the boys left with Ian, I used the time to get a much needed mani-pedi. But anticipation was taunting me in the most delicious way, and the technician kept complaining for me to be still. After she repaired the polish on four of my toes, it was apparent my uncontrollable movements were no longer funny, and I believe she retorted to calling me names in her native tongue. It cost me a larger tip.
I took my second shower of the day and shaved for the second time as well. However, the razor touched areas that hadn’t been trimmed in quite some time. I left just a sliver of what nature had given me and prayed if there was wax involved in our play, “that” area would be avoided.
The wax. Play. I quickly realized Ian had the toys; I didn’t. Well, make that one lonely vibrator in my drawer. Sara’s Secrets was only a few miles away, and I drove by it every day on the way to the boutique. I’d been inside once when I’d purchased the vibrator. To be honest, the place gave me the creeps.
I had plenty of time to go peruse the store for something new, but what did I need? I knew nothing about that kind of stuff.
I threw on an old pair of jogging pants and a TCU T-shirt that didn’t match and was three sizes too big, but who cared? I was only going to the sex shop.
My stomach flipped in cartwheels on the drive over.
I hated door chimes on stores. They announced your arrival in the most loud, obnoxious way.
“Hi, welcome to Sara’s Secrets,” the young gentleman at the counter greeted me.
Just fucking great. It would have to be a guy. Couldn’t it be a sexually educated female who would know what things felt like?
I approached a wall stocked with vibrators and cock rings. Somehow, I couldn’t picture Ian with one of those, but then before that other night, I wouldn’t have pictured any man with one.
Talk about inexperienced…
“Anything I can help you with?” the clerk asked, his voice shy of monotone.
“No, just exploring new options.” I meandered around.
I found a kit with a red silk blindfold and bondage ribbons. My throat began to tickle as I remembered how it felt to be tied to the bed and thirsting for Ian’s pleasure.
The guy gave me a funky smile as I sat the box on the counter and walked toward the back wall. Surely to God, he wasn’t picturing using those on me.
Massage oils and lubricants, anal plugs and beads. Oh for God’s sake, I was completely turned on and burning with anticipation of what Ian had in store for me.
Why did it have to be what he had in store? Why couldn’t I ask for what I wanted?
Truth was, I didn’t know what to ask for. I’d never asked for anything in my sex life other than silently dreaming to be desired.
The variety pack of massage oils included a sample of a clit sensitizer. I was deep into studying the package when I heard a strange-pitched woman’s voice from over my shoulder.
“You’ll enjoy the clit crème more than the rest of that box. Shit’s amazing.”
I turned to see a twenty-something gal standing a foot taller than me, licking on a lollipop while politely touching the products on the end-cap.
Something was completely off with her.
“Do you work here?”
She put her hands on her hips and cocked her head to the side. “No, honey, but at one time or another, I’ve used about every item in this store. I’m sure I can show you a thing or two.” She laughed and not in a feminine way.
Oh, my God, a transvestite? No freakin’ way.
“Good to know,” I mumbled as I practically jogged to the counter with the oils.
“I’ll take both of these, please.” I refused to make eye contact and tossed cash at the clerk to cover the purchase, continuing to stare at my wallet.
He took his sweet time bagging the items, while I was dying to get the hell outta there before I was hit upon again.
I sat in the car and looked at the pink bag of tricks, avoiding the need to explore the contents. The horny feeling I’d encountered earlier had hitchhiked on down the road to some other lucky bitch. My pleasure ride had run into a double-sided short circuit the minute I’d got creeped-out in the store.
My phone rang through the car speakers, startling me.
“Hey, where are you?”
“I ran an errand. Are you at my house?” I pulled out onto the main road amidst the traffic.
“We stopped, but you didn’t answer. I’m going to order pizza for them, and Ty said he’s allergic to mushrooms. Is that allergic as in hates or blow-up, puffy allergic?”
“Blow up, puffy.”
“Noted. Where are you?” It was the second time he’d asked.
“I’m on my way home. I’ll be there in about ten minutes; the traffic is a mess.”
He paused. “You aren’t going to tell me, are you?”
Was he on to me? Nah, surely not. “Didn’t I tell you I was getting a mani-pedi?”
“I thought that was earlier. Okay, see you in a bit.”
I don’t know why I didn’t want to tell him. Perhaps I wasn’t as comfortable buying the items as I’d thought. Once again I slid back under the veil of doubt and insecurity.
I hadn’t been home for five minutes when the doorbell rang. Convinced he was a stalker, I opened the door without even looking to see who it was.
“Where the heck have you been?” Shawna asked, barging in toward the kitchen.
I followed her. “Running an errand. What’s up your craw?”
“Did you forget the cookies and the trays tonight for Jor
ge’s corporate party?”
“Shit.” We were standing in my kitchen in the middle of a stare down.
“I knew you’d forget.” Her sigh was clearly audible.
I ran to the deep freezer in the garage and returned with frozen dough. “I didn’t forget the dough. They are ready to bake, and your house will smell amaz—”
I dropped the dough on the table.
She was holding up the sack from Sara’s Secrets, and my purchases were on the table. “What the hell? Planning a play party?” Her smirk said it all.
I grabbed the sack and stuffed the two boxes back inside, taking them to my room. She was on my heels, but that didn’t stop me from shoving them in my bedside table.
“You’re with Ian again?”
“No, I’m not with Ian.”
“Then who?” She put her hands on hips. Her eyes looked like large, blue sapphires, and she was failing to hide her amusement.
“Well, it’s Ian, but…but…we’re not together.”
She sat down on the edge of my bed and crossed her arms. “Define together ’cause that looks like something for some togetherness.”
“We’re going to be fuck-buddies.”
“Really. You don’t say,” she mumbled.
I approached with my arms open wide. “What’s gotten into you?”
“You. Happiness is right in front of you, yet you’re so fucking stubborn you won’t embrace it.”
“I’m planning on it tonight. Leave me alone.” I glanced at the clock. “You’ve got cookies to bake.”
“Sex is not happiness… Well, maybe temporarily for about eight seconds. Make a commitment with him. He’s a catch just nipping at your hook.”
Pointing toward the door, I said, “Go, you’ve got things to do.”
She took some of the dough and borrowed my serving platters, while I baked some of the cookies for her to speed the process. I felt bad about forgetting Jorge’s party. Since Ian had come into my life, I’d allowed myself to become unorganized.
Deep in cookie dough and racing the clock, I suddenly felt his gaze light up my flesh. I kept the hot tray in my hand at a distance as I slowly turned around. There was Ian propped against the counter, watching me with an amused look on his face.
I stared at him for a moment. He was sexy as sin in jeans, white shirt, and dark jacket.
“It’s not nice to stare.” His voice was low and sultry.
I sat the tray down. “It’s not nice to sneak up on people.”
He smiled. God, his teeth were perfect, and his permanently tanned skin shone brightly against his white shirt.
I followed his gaze down to the tray of cookies.
“Are those for me?”
Biting my lip, I seductively shook my head.
“Boys.”
I shook my head again.
“You’re tormenting me. They’re peanut butter, and you know I—”
I put my finger in the dough and brought out a small scoop, placing it between his lips.
He tasted the dough and swallowed hard before pulling my wrist close to his chest. “Save some of that dough for us later, please.”
“Deal. I need to run these over to Shawna. Then I’ll get dressed.”
He pulled me into an embrace, unexpectedly. “I’ll take them. You go get ready. We’re late.”
Chapter 20
Ian
“Dude, Shawna just said you’re going out with Chelz tonight,” Jorge greeted me. “That’s awesome. Glad to see you’re both getting your act together.”
“Nope, it’s not like that. Yes, I’m taking her to dinner, but it’s because I noticed how unhealthy and stressed she looks. I thought she needed time off and a few drinks, with some rest to follow. Doctor’s orders.”
Jorge took the tray of cookies from me and laughed. “Oh, so that’s what it’s called these days. A night of rest.” He was mocking me.
I shook my head. “Seriously, I’m not going there with you. If you hadn’t noticed, she looks run-down, practically exhausted.”
He studied my face, and it was apparent he was processing what I said. “She’s worried about the surgery.”
“Yep. And there’s more going on than she’s letting on, I’m sure of it. Tonight is about finding out what that is.”
Jorge trailed me to the front door and gave me a pat on the back. “Good luck with that, man. She’s a hard one. Let me know if I can help out.”
By the time I got back to Chelsie’s, she was dressed in a black skirt, sinful heels, and a white lace top. Keeping my hands off her was going to be impossible.
“It’s not nice to stare,” she smirked.
“Then you should’ve worn something else. You’re hot.”
She giggled. It sounded so sweet.
“Where are we going?” she asked once we were in my car.
“You’ll see soon enough.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted her fingers laced together in her lap. Laced, or more like entangled, with her was where I wanted to be, but tonight wasn’t about what I wanted. It was about what she needed. Carefree is what I intended on giving her.
I searched for a parking spot and watched as she took in our surroundings. “Velvet Taco?”
“Have you been here before?”
She shook her head, but I saw the glitter float in her eyes. She was completely intrigued and embracing the opportunity.
Once inside, we stood in line and studied the large, chalk menu wall with such descriptions as the #7 Cuban Pig, a delightful delicacy with pulled ork and Gruyere cheese. I’d had it several times, and it was definitely a favorite of mine.
We were fairly early for the crowd, and she took her time ordering, changing her mind at least a dozen times. I wanted her to eat, drink, and have fun, so I ordered one of everything behind her and followed as she chose our place to sit.
I was introduced to the Velvet Taco when I interviewed for my position, and I graced them with my presence twice a week, ever since moving to Dallas. The place was a hole in the wall that was a favorite amongst the SMU crowd, conveniently located close to the main campus. The dining tables are long wood high-top counters with about six or eight stools on each side. The entire place couldn’t hold more than thirty people at a time, but folks came in droves and would line up for the amazing food to the point of standing room only.
“How’d you know about this place?”
“Guys at work. They love it. You will too, once you taste their food.”
From across the wooden table, I watched her relax as we enjoyed our margaritas and waited on our order. Her smiles were bright, and she giggled about something.
“What’s so funny?” I asked.
“We’re so totally overdressed for the occasion.”
Looking around, I could see she was right. Yes, the room was full of jeans, hoodies, and beanies, but to be with her so sexy in a skirt and heels made my cock fill my trousers to a level of pain.
Once they called my name, I picked up our huge order. People standing around the counter watched me with astonishment, while I carried the overloaded tray to our place at the table.
“Oh, my gosh! Why did you order all of this?” She laughed again.
“I can’t wait to see you taste everything. Then I’m going to taste you.”
She dove in and moaned. “Wow, this corn is so good,” she said, completely ignoring what I’d said.
I had a flashback to the first time I’d heard her moan. Yes, the reason was totally different, and I hoped to hear her whimper my name like that again, very soon.
We stuffed ourselves, and it thrilled me to see her eating so well. “Be sure to save room for dessert,” I teased.
She looked over at the menu wall. “They have red velvet cake.” Her brow peaked.
“Cookies at home.” I quickly recovered. I wanted our next spot to be a surprise for her.
We drove over to Chocolate Secrets and parked around the side. I opened the door for her, and she studied my
face.
With a sweet smile, she said, “You remembered.”
I did, indeed.
Chapter 21
Chelsie
Our evening presented itself as completely platonic, other than his insistence on driving and, of course, paying for dinner. We hung out at Velvet Taco like old college friends. It was nice letting someone else do everything for a change and going to such a casual place where the food and experience was nothing short of fabulous.
Kudos to him, a night very well planned on his part.
Not once did he try to hold my hand or touch me in any way at dinner, and for some reason, I was a bit conflicted about that.
When he pulled into the parking space next to Chocolate Secrets, I was thrilled. Their Flaming Banana Split was to die for, and if it was his first time there, he was going to be pleasantly surprised by the delightful hole in the wall.
We ate dessert and listened to the jazz singer in the next room filling the space with delectable ambience. We talked about the boys, our college experiences, and even sports. His love of surfing kept coming into the conversation. I was taken aback by his confession that he’d actually started Oliver out surfing when he was just three years old. Such love for a sport not available in Dallas left me questioning his move.
“Do you miss the beach more than you thought you would?”
“I knew I would miss it, but the trade-off has been worth it. Oliver’s much happier here.”
“And what about you?”
He paused before he answered. When he ran his fingers through his hair, I sensed what he wasn’t saying and the ambivalence he faced.
“I’m getting there.” The release of breath that followed was heavy.
He wasn’t happy. It hadn’t been obvious to me before, but now that we were both relaxing and “letting our hair down”, I was able to see through his invisible veil more clearly.
“You don’t like Dallas?”
He took the last few bites of the ice cream we shared. “I love Dallas. It’s medicine I’m fed up with. Like I’ve said before, it was never my choice for a career, and now with our insurance in chaos, it’s even worse. I’d leave it if I could, but I’m a fourth generation surgeon. I’m stuck. My family wouldn’t accept me for my love of music and the arts. In fact, during my first two years at school, Dad stopped speaking to me because I refused to talk about medical school. I finally gave in, but it changed our relationship.”
Conflicted on 5th: A 5th Avenue Romance Novel, Book One (5th Avenue Romance Series 1) Page 13
