by Nancy Lieder
This lesson, on taking responsibility, is not one we can address with a few words, as it is complex enough to differ for
every situation. However, some guidelines are obvious. When shouldering responsibility the entity should assess their
ability to meet all contingencies. If, for instance, they sense that in the main they are equal to the task, then they should move forward but communicate the points where they feel help from others will be required. If passion to become
involved is strong, but skills or knowledge lacking, the entity may enlist a cohort to team up, thus gaining the skills to match the passions. If confident and experienced, but suddenly finding themselves in a pinch, the entity who has taken
responsibility for a situation should communicate clearly and unmistakably their need for help.
In all cases, the answer is communication and helping hands.
Take the situation of the charming father to be, who has started something which later comes to terrify him. He runs,
or feigns indifference to the child, because he is at a loss at how to proceed. Imagine this situation, all too common in human society, with open communication and helping hands. The father feels free to state that his heart is full of pride
and eager love but he doesn't know how to pick the baby up without breaking it. He may resent the need to spend
precious cash on endless crises and fear the trend will only acerbate. Will his life not matter anymore? How different
matters might be if he could openly discuss his fears and accept help from others, rather than letting his fears build
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ZetaTalk: Taking Responsibility
until they propel him from the woman and child.
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ZetaTalk: Commitments
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ZetaTalk: Commitments
Note: written on Mar 15, 1996
For the human animal, the question of commitment has a long history, as mammals by their nature commit to mates,
offspring, kin and kindred. But being by nature emotionally complex and having been granted increased intelligence
makes for painful dilemmas. Where an ape makes the call based almost entirely on emotions, essentially driven by
their hormones, the naked ape weights in with possibilities. Feeling protective of a woman he is bedding, a man does
not simply accept this as a concomitant of sexual desire, he starts to worry about how to put the kids they may have
through college. Sharing vegetables from their garden, neighbors may not accept this as simple bonding but begin to
worry about future intrusions. Might the neighbor show up for dinner one day, uninvited, or perhaps park himself on
the doorstep and demand to be taken in? The ape shares food without these worries, as a simple life without
possessions doesn't complicate the picture.
At the base of a fear of involvement is the inability to say no. If every contact melts all the borders then conquest
cannot be resisted. It's all or nothing. Those who fear involvement are either fearful of losing this fight to retain their individuality, or desire this consumption and would start on a slide with no stop. The desire to be possessed, to lose oneself in another, is a form of hero worship but also a sign that the individual thinks little of himself and wishes to
augment the package he represents. In either case, a stronger self image is the answer, as when reaching across
borders, one must have a country to extend a hand from.
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ZetaTalk: Scapegoats
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ZetaTalk: Scapegoats
Note: written by Jul 15, 1995
Hatred and scapegoating are rift throughout humanity, and in truth, throughout all intelligent species everywhere. Why
is it that emotions can ramp up and focus, like a laser light, at innocents? What could cause men to deliberately harm
innocent children? Although others can see that the cause is not just, and the victims not guilty, the perpetrators are
sternly convinced they are doing the right thing. What is going on here, and what is going wrong!
In society many emotions must be hidden, and in many families this is learned young. The babe senses that certain
postures get applause, and other postures illicit rage. Does this eliminate the emotion? It does not. These emotions
simply go underground, where they cause many problems as they are not recognized for what they are. What are these
emotions, and why are they unwelcome. In families, cohesive emotions are applauded, and discord is punished. As the
father, or father figure in most cases, is most powerful and dominant, this is the fulcrum where discord is determined.
In short, if the dominant father figure makes a statement or a determination, any challenge to this is deemed discord
and is punished. The frustration this genders, particularly in young boys, is buried, but like fires in the underbrush, the sparks and coals glow with life, waiting to spring up at a later point.
By what logic does a young man, now grown, turn with savagery against innocents simply because decisions in their
youth were arbitrary? This is not a decision made in the heart, as those who scapegoat and form the core of hate
groups are not in touch with their feelings toward others. They are in the process of learning how to suppress feelings
toward others, and moving in the direction, if not already arrived, of the Service-to-Self orientation. What then is the
motive? It is to relieve rage, which cannot be directed toward the actual source, perhaps long dead or at least buried in the subconscious, but in any direction that results in an emotional catharsis. The scapegoat, screaming and bloody or
perhaps pleading for mercy and life, is viewed, at least subconsciously, as the father figure or whomever was dominant
and arbitrary in the past. As the true cause of the rage is in fact not addressed, this catharsis is short lived and yet
another scapegoat is sought.
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ZetaTalk: Holocaust Denial
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ZetaTalk: Holocaust Denial
Note: written on May 15, 1997
The many scenes of the holocaust are vivid and compelling, and continue to appear afresh in print, the horror
undiminished over time. The holocaust horrors are likewise well documented, as where millions of neighbors are
dragged off there are likewise millions of neighbors left behind to remember the circumstances. And where numerous
gas chambers and concentration camps have train loads of hollow eyed and stick starved Jews moving toward the gas
chambers and only the smoky smell of death and piles of gold fillings jerked from the teeth of the dead emerging from
the camps, there can scarcely be any doubt as to the activity going on. However, the fact that the holocaust is vivid and well documented is one of the reasons for a holocaust denial.
In short, the more horrible the event, the more guilt one bears toward this or similar situations, the more likely denial will be used to deal with the discomfort the event engenders. Denial of horrific events is so common as to be almost an
everyday event in human lives. The ease with which the conscious mind of humans can sever memories so the mental
pathways are not traveled readily adds to this, as it is a ready route to be taken by those who want to forget or put an
alternate story into place. Those responsible for an accident begin
to think that the victim himself caused it, thus
relieving themselves of responsibility. Those responsible for a crime likewise excuse themselves by blaming the
victim.
This tendency is one reason the most heinous crimes, such as the mass rape of a young girl, can be turned around to be
her responsibility. She was flirtatious, and brought it all down upon herself. By this all men who turned an eye toward
a vulnerable girl and pondered having her in a helpless state are relieved of responsibility for the acts that such
thoughts might engender. They tell themselves that they are not the perpetrators, even in their thoughts, as the victim was guilty. Likewise the holocaust is often explained away as something the Jews brought down upon themselves, due
to being financially and professionally successful. Then engendered jealously, so they had it coming to them! If this
does not fly as an excuse, then the holocaust never happened. Those wishing to deny that thoughts can turn into
action, and that they share the thoughts that the perpetrators held, will even cling to the absurd rather than discomfit
themselves.
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ZetaTalk: Forgiving
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ZetaTalk: Forgiving
Note: written on Sep 15, 1995
Forgiving someone who has injured one involves two parties - the injured and the perpetrator.
Circumstances may be such that the injury was an accident and the perpetrator horrified and asking what they can do
to make amends. In this case the path to forgiveness is already paved with possibilities, and the injured has but to
specify what is required to make amends and the two parties will begin to heal each other. Circumstances may be such
that the injury was an accident but the perpetrator in denial. Nothing has happened, and even if it did it wasn't their
fault. In this case forgiving the injury must take place on separate paths, with the injured coming to terms with the
accident as just that - an accident. The perpetrator has already forgiven himself, as he wasn't there and there is nothing to forgive. Circumstances may also be such that the injury was deliberate, but was a result of a disagreement, a fight,
and fault lies all around. One was pushed beyond his limits and lashed out. One was steadily tortured until a dark
mood overtook him. In these cases forgiveness usually progresses rapidly, as both parties are clearly cognizant of the
underlying currents and the shared responsibility for what has happened. Tears, hugs, and a resolve to be more careful
in the future.
Forgiveness is most difficult where the injury is deliberate and no fault lies in the one injured - a true victim, an
innocent. And thus the perpetrator has savaged the injured for sport, for a power trip, or to simply gratify themselves at the expense of another. In these cases forgiveness is inappropriate, and is not the issue. In these cases the injured
should be concentrating not on forgiveness, but on defense, and after ending the assaults on changing the
circumstances that allowed the injury in the first place. Does your criminal justice system forgive the sadistic murderer and say to the victim - the problem is yours as you have not learned to forgive?
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ZetaTalk: Multiple Personality
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ZetaTalk: Multiple Personality
Note: written on Jul 15, 1996
The human mind has the capacity to deliberately forget, allowing the amnesia state to wash away bridges between
chemical memory lanes. This is but a step away from compartmentalizing memories into packages the human feels
capable of dealing with at one time.
Brain chemistry and brain structure wise, the process is the same. The average human can point to instances in himself
or others where selective forgetting occurred. One just forgets that embarrassing moment or that appointment to go to
the dentist. In amnesia the chemistry in the brain shuts down to the extent that the conscious brain is not recording new memories or playing back old memories. It's off-line, rather than on-line, as they say in the computer business.
Individuals recovering from coma move in and out of this state when first awakening. Selective amnesia attacks just
those bridges that lead to painful memories, washing these away. Here the conscious brain chemistry is not affected as
a whole but is altered at the site due to the strong emotions engendered. The chemical process, however, is the same
for selective amnesia, total amnesia, or multiple personality disorders.
Its not uncommon for humans to have what they call different sides, or to have what is called a Dr. Jekyll and Mr.
Hyde personality. This is the same mental technique that those suffering from multiple personality disorder employ.
Situations and the responses to those situations that are by their nature incompatible are compartmentalized. Take anger, for instance, a common facet of the personality to be suppressed. The little boy who is punished for expressing
anger represses this, but the boiling rage he feels at times expresses itself when he is out with the other boys, in
pranks. He may package other aspects of his personality into this persona too, so that he is not only reserving anger for these times, but being messy and slouching rather than standing straight, too. Rebellion time, a common situation in
adolescence.
Individuals who develop multiple personality disorders are raised in harsh and hostile social environments where
conflicts and duality are rampant. Children who observe hypocrisy in the adults around them soon pick up this duality,
but most often it is a conscious duality. One compliments someone to their face, but behind that individual's back
denigrates them, being two-faced as you say. In multiple personality disorder the need to be two-faced is extreme, and
is not just a nicety but a lifesaving tactic. If mother cannot abide discussing sex much less observing any expression of sexual heat, but father is molesting the children regularly barely outside of the mother's view, then extreme duality is
present. Perhaps things get broken at those times, in the tussle, but where mother ordinarily demands immaculate
neatness she has a remarkable tolerance for broken lamps and tossed pillows after a molestation episode - more
duality. The child trying to cope in this situation may thus package their messy persona in with their sexual persona.
In response to the duality their childhood presents, the human developing a multiple personality will compartmentalize
the various aspects of their personality. Anger, the sex drive, curiosity, aggression, greed, sloth, artistic expression, fear, compassion - those aspects of the persona that are compatible are packaged together, as they are let out to be free at the same time. For multiple personality disorder to develop, harsh duality is not only present in early life but is the situation throughout childhood and frequently into early adulthood. The compartmentalization encompasses their whole
early life, and forms the base for the later years. Thus cut into pieces, the sufferer finds they cannot cope with ordinary life. The socially proper persona may be on-line while the individual is standing in the checkout line when someone
nearby drops a jar, shattering the jar and splashing tomato sauce everywhere. The proper persona goes off-line, in
distress, and when the messy persona takes over those at the grocery store find themselves standing next to an entirely
different person!
Invariably, in multiple personality disorders, the individu
al is not able to cope. This permeates their life, evident in
social situations and employment alike. Ordinary living requires the many sides of an individual to be present at the
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ZetaTalk: Multiple Personality
same time. A business meeting requires one to be calm and orderly to absorb the subject matter, but also to be
aggressive when presenting one's opinion, fearful of being rejected, and angry when rejection occurs. An individual
who has rigidly packaged their persona may find at least three different persona called out during such a meeting,
ineffectively handling this social situation and startling their co-workers. Thus, they get fired, become reclusive, and
often remain in the home where their personalities were warped in the first place - the victim yet again.
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ZetaTalk: Dowsing
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ZetaTalk: Dowsing
Note: written on Apr 15, 1997
The practice of dowsing, using divining rods to locate water, is so common as to not be doubted, but no one, including
the practitioner, understands how they work. Some humans can douse, but most cannot, so its recognized to be a talent
or ability within the practitioner. Dowsing works best when the dowser is allowed to walk about out in the fields and
forest by him or herself, uninterrupted. When crowds follow about, they are less likely to find water, and many
dowsers come unannounced at odd hours to assure themselves the privacy they require. Dowsers are called upon when
all else fails. Well after well has been dug, following the geologists recommendations on the lay of the land, location
of local springs, emergence of underground streams or rivers, stratification of rock layers, and success of other wells in the area. In despair, the dowser is brought in, and against all odds and against all reason they point to an unlikely place and chances are that a well placed there will be productive. What is going on during dowsing, and how does this