“Good.” She tossed her bag across her body and walked to the doorway.
“Don’t go down there looking like you were crying. Never let them see you cry, Frank. You’re too tough for that shit.”
“I’m sensitive. I can’t help it.” She shrugged her shoulders and I smiled a little. I walked over to her dresser and picked up the jade skin roller.
“Let me de-puff under your eyes.” I rolled it under her eyes and over her eyelids then moved to her cheeks. I repeated it a few times the pulled back. It didn’t take all the redness away but it helped. “When you come home, I’ll do your makeup.”
“You will?” She squeaked, clapping her hands together.
“Yes, but it stays between us. When we have our next sleepover, I’ll give you a full beat. Lashes and all.” I touched the tip of her nose and she gave me the prettiest warm smile.
We went downstairs and I hoped I’d given Frankie enough strength to deal with her unstable mother. Evander looked at me then at Frankie. His eyes absorbed her as he checked to see if she’d been crying. “You okay, kiddo?” he quizzed.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Are we all gonna talk or is it time to go?” She asked her mother.
“We can talk.” Alexis’s demeanor had done a complete 180 after Evander laid her out.
“Good,” Frankie hung her bag on the back of a chair then had a seat.
“What do you want to say, sweetheart?” Evander asked, clasping his hands on the countertop.
“Mom, I want you to sign the pickup papers so Xari can drop me off and pick me up from school. Also, I want you to stop being difficult about her being my nanny. I love her. She’s so cool.”
“You love her,” Alexis scoffed.
“Let her talk,” Evander grumbled.
“That’s all,” Frankie said.
“Well, Frankie if Miss Lucas will accept, I’m proud to offer her the job permanently,” Evander said quietly. I tried not to smile too big and bright but I couldn’t help letting a little grin cross my face.
“Of course,” I said.
“Good. I’m happy to have you on board.” His buttoned-up tone was back.
“I’ve been on board,” I said, crossing my legs under the table.
“Now you’re official. There’s a difference.” He pinned me with his gaze.
“Is there?” I asked, lifting an eyebrow. The energy between us crackled to life, charging the air.
“I just told you there was. Stop being difficult.”
I eyed him for a few quiet beats then bit the side of my lip.
“I still don’t feel comfortable with her being around you, Frankie.” Alexis refused to look at me. She focused all her attention on Frankie. She stroked her knuckles. “You know I’m just trying to keep you safe.”
“I am safe and if you don’t sign those papers, I’m not going to your house every other weekend.” I had to do a double-take. Did that come out of Francesca Freeman’s mouth?
“What?” Alexis damn near choked. Her eyes were wide with awe before she narrowed them. “You’re giving me an ultimatum over this woman? Are you serious right now, Francesca?”
“Yes.” Frankie’s voice was small but strong. I was beyond proud.
“Well, you heard the girl.” Evander pushed the papers toward Alexis then dropped a pen at her fingertips. The silence in that kitchen was stretched so thin it would shatter under the next inhale.
Alexis’s throat dipped when she swallowed. Several tense seconds ticked by before she growled and picked up the pen, signing the papers for Frankie’s school.
“Thank you, Alexis. Now maybe you can accept the fact that Miss Lucas is Frankie’s nanny. She’s perfectly capable of handling our daughter. They already get along famously and since Miss Lucas has been with us, I’ve noticed Frankie coming out of her shell in a good way.” He paused for a few seconds and looked at each one of us.
“In order to make this work for all of us, you need to practice cordialities. I don’t care how you feel inside. As long as Miss Lucas hasn’t disrespected you, you don’t need to disrespect her.” He was in full-blown politician mode.
His words came out stiffer and his tone was diplomatic and even. His whiskey brown eyes swept back and forth between me and Alexis. I flashed a smile and said, “I’m fine with that. I’m just here for Frankie.” I pretended not to see the way Alexis rolled her eyes at me.
“Fine.” Alexis stood and looked at Frankie. “Come on, baby. Let’s go.” She steered toward the foyer and Frankie’s body seemed to shrink. She pulled her shoulders up near her ears and cast her stare down.
“Bye Daddy. I’ll see you on Sunday.”
“Okay, sweetheart. If you need me or Xari you can call either one of us. I have some office stuff to do later but after that, I’m in the house, okay?” He smoothed her curly hair back and kissed her forehead.
My heart knocked against my chest watching how much he loved his daughter. It made me think about my father. He loved me like that too. Spoiled me rotten every chance he got. Probably how I ended up in my current predicament but I loved him for it.
I waved goodbye to Frankie and she pulled away from her dad to hug me instead.
“By, Xari. Don’t forget, I want this face beat when I come home.”
“You got it,” I chuckled tossing a wink at her.
Every time she left to stay with Alexis, I missed her like crazy. In a short month, Frankie had become my little BFF. It was weird how quickly someone could move into your heart and set up shop.
“I have to go to the office for a few hours, then I have a charity golf tournament to show face at. You wanna come or…” His last word hung in the air. An empty hand waiting for me to grab hold.
Did he just ask me out?
Was I reading into it too much?
“Um…” I tugged on my springy curls and looked up at him. His brown eyes were full of regret.
“It’s fine. I just didn’t want you in the house alone, I guess.”
“You think I’m going to steal something? Evander, I’ve been in your house alone almost every day for a month.”
“No, I don’t think you’re going to steal anything,” he stammered. He shoved his big hands into his pockets.
“I have to practice playing,” I told him honestly. He pulled a smile tight across his face like a mask then nodded.
“Right. I forgot how disciplined you are when it comes to the harp. Well, call me if anything comes up.” He walked away from me, into the den and my shoulders fell.
Normally, I would have given him a hard time and threw it in his face that he technically asked me out. Something wouldn’t let me do it though. Something in me wanted to go with Evander to his office and the tournament. I liked his company even when we weren’t at each other’s necks.
I couldn’t abandon practice though. He knew that about me. I practiced daily. No matter what. It’s how I stayed sharp and on top of my game. It’s how I remained the best.
I was fixed to my spot by an invisible force. It held onto my shoes and gripped my ankles. Why the hell couldn’t I just call out to him and apologize?
I rubbed the bridge of my nose and went into the formal living room to light my candles and sit at the harp. I needed to disperse the weird energy trickling through me. The only way to do that was to dig into my music.
…
TWELVE
When I got home from the golf tournament, a cold glass of whiskey was calling my name. I walked into the kitchen and went to the Subzero to grab a piece of ice before heading to the den.
I didn’t bother going upstairs to my room to undress because I’d been away from my book all day and my characters were racing through my mind. Words were piling up in the corners of my brain and dripping down my conscious. It was a melody that I had to get out.
When I crossed into the den, I heard the familiar sounds of harp strings plucking notes into the air. It unwound the tightness of the day note by note. It was like a massage for my soul.
I’d never been into classical music no matter how much my parents tried to force it on me. I was a hip-hop and R&B kind of kid. I rejected Mozart and Bach. Instead, Aaliyah and Tupac songs fueled me.
Hearing the soothing sounds coming from the living room was different though. I knew she was playing something classical but I had no idea what the piece was. I let the notes calm me while I sat behind my desk and pulled out my laptop.
The more I listened to the hauntingly beautiful music floating in the air the more words flowed from my fingers. It was a gentle push and pull that I craved more of. When I hit a chapter break, I shut the laptop, grabbed my glass of whiskey, and went into the formal living room where Xari was.
As usual, she was so wrapped up in playing that she didn’t notice me standing there. Maybe it was the liquor in my system but I couldn’t stop staring at her. She was beautiful.
She still had on the black and white skirt and red shirt from earlier but her shoes were off and tucked in the corner. The balls of her feet were pressed against the floor and her heels were raised, flexing her calf muscles beneath velvet, sandy brown skin.
I wanted to lick that skin.
I wanted to bite that calf muscle and listen to her whine while I moved up her thighs to spread her pussy.
“Oh, I didn’t know you were home.” When the hell had she stopped playing? I didn’t even notice. I cleared my throat and nodded, moving to the couch.
“Yeah, I got in about an hour ago. I’ve been listening to you play. Have you been in this same spot all day, Xari?”
“No. I ate and went to the bathroom.”
“Jesus. You’re a machine.”
“I am not.” She stood up and stretched, reaching her hands toward the ceiling. Her shirt lifted, showing a sliver of her breasts from below.
Fuck. She wasn’t wearing a bra. My eyes immediately went to her nipples.
Stiff. Peaked. Pebbles.
“You take requests?” I quizzed, resting my ankle on top of my knee.
“Um, sure. I’m not used to it, but it should be fun. It’ll give me more practice.”
I took a long sip of whiskey and opened my laptop. “Can you play Whatever You Want, by…”
“Toni, Tony, Tone,” she said, smiling.
“I forgot you think you’re a nineties aficionado.”
“I absolutely am. I told you I was born in the wrong era.” She walked over to the harp and sat on her stool, positioning herself with raised heels and immaculate posture. Her spine was straight as a pin but her arms and fingers moved fluidly.
I watched her from my spot on the couch with lowered lids. She shut her eyes and plucked out a few notes, trying to get the feel for the song. She played a few notes, then her forehead creased with a frown. She gave the slightest shake of her head, then played a few more notes. She still wasn’t pleased.
When she played the next nine notes, I recognized the string-heavy melody of the song. Xari’s lips curved the smallest bit and she continued playing, rocking back and forth with the harp.
I intended to write while she played but I couldn’t stop staring at her. She was full of madness and passion. It was a beautiful sight. I studied her face, serene and calm. Her arms and hands moving together. Her breasts moved rhythmically with each breath and note she played. Her legs were parted to accommodate the bulk of the harp and my eyes ate up the vision.
I stared between her thighs, hoping for a glimpse of her panties. I was a dirty old man. There was no way around it.
“That’s beautiful,” I said, finally, realizing I was eye-fucking her and she had no idea.
“It’s rough,” she sighed without opening her eyes or breaking the melody. “Some of the notes are off but it’s getting there.”
“It’s perfect, Xari. You’re too hard on yourself.”
“If I’m not hard on myself, who will be?”
“Good point, but sometimes you have to learn to have fun. Playing the harp doesn’t always have to be business.” I stood up and walked over to her. The moment I was in her space, the air heated…thickened. I knew she had candles lit but this wasn’t warmth from the flames flickering around her.
It was the same heat that always charged when we were close. It was stifling sometimes but I’d managed to ignore it all month. Clearly, I was made of steel.
I stood behind her and placed my hands on her shoulders. She was still working through the music for Whatever You Want when I started kneading her shoulders, inching toward her neck.
“It’s still not right,” she sighed.
“It doesn’t have to be. I just like listening to you play. It’s the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard.”
“Really?” Her hands fell away from the strings and she turned her head to look up at me. When she faced the harp again, I started working the muscles in her neck. I saw her lashes flutter and the reaction made my dick stiffen.
“Really. Can you play Anniversary?” I asked.
“On a Tony, Toni, Tone kick?” She quizzed.
“Maybe. Or maybe I want to throw different songs at you to see you switch it up and not pour too much focus into something that’s supposed to be fun.”
She switched effortlessly to Anniversary and the music did nothing to dissuade the heat mounting in the space between our bodies. If anything, the soft sound made me want to kiss her neck more than before.
“Because you know how to have fun, Senator?” Even in that charged moment, Xari couldn’t help her smart mouth.
“I do. I might not do it often but I know how to.”
“Oh? And what would be considered fun for you right now?” The way she played in perfect pitch while holding a conversation with my fingers massaging her neck amazed me. This was a different side of Xari. This side of her wasn’t immature. It was disciplined and poised. It was pulled together and sexy as hell.
“You really want to know?” I asked, my voice turning low and hungry.
“I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t want to know, Freeman.”
“Oh, are we doing that again?” I chuckled.
“You’re misbehaving,” she countered. The smooth curve of her cheek lifted and her dimples popped out to say hi.
Those dimples made my dick so fucking hard. I was glad I wasn’t pressed up against her back or else she would have felt how hard they made me.
“How so?” I quizzed.
“The way your hands are moving on my neck,” she said softly.
“Then you really don’t want to hear what my idea of fun is right now.”
The music stopped abruptly but she didn’t turn around to face me. With my fingers on her neck, I could tell when her pulse quickened. It was practically vibrating beneath her skin.
“I do.” Even though I knew she was full of adrenaline, she didn’t let on. Her voice was calm and her body was still.
I didn’t tell her with words. Instead, I dipped my head low until my lips swept over her warm, honey velvet skin. When I brushed against her with my mouth, her breathing stuttered but she didn’t pull away. I pounced on the lack of hesitation as consent.
I pressed a kiss to the side of her neck, testing the waters. She let out a soft gasp. It was quiet but it plucked open the flimsy hinge keeping the demon inside of me at bay. That gasp let me know what she wanted.
I slid my tongue along the curve of her neck before gripping her soft, cotton candy hair and tugging it to one side. I pressed my teeth into the tendons beneath the slender column of her throat. A growl rumbled somewhere in my chest. A direct response to the moan spilling over Xari’s full lips.
Benita Applebum. You gotta put me on.
Benita. Benita. Benita.
“Wait,” she said, still drunk from her own moan and my mouth on her neck. She stood and turned to face me. “This can’t be right.” Confusion flickered in her espresso eyes as her brows furled together.
I had a raging hard cock so I didn’t get the confusion. “What can’t be right? You have to know how fucking sexy I think yo
u are.”
“Of course I do,” she said in true Xari fashion. “I mean…the way you kissed and bit my fucking neck, Evander.”
“What about it?” I grabbed her hips and pulled her against me. Right then, I didn’t give a fuck about her feeling my dick. I wanted her to feel it. I wanted her to know what she did to me. Resisting was exhausting.
“I just didn’t think you had that kind of passion. It’s probably a fluke.”
“Fluke? Xari, stop fucking playing with me.” I pulled on her curls, making her head snap back. She bit her bottom lip while her eyes locked onto mine.
“Kiss me, Evander,” she demanded. Her bossy controlling ass drove me crazy in the best and worst ways.
I tightened my hold on her hair then kissed her red lips. I wasn’t gentle either. I went in for the kill. I bit her bottom lip, sucked on it, swept my tongue against hers then pulled it back, making her chase the kiss hungrily. I crushed her petite frame against mine, digging my dick into her flat stomach.
I consumed her with that kiss. I’d been holding back for too fucking long. I was ready to peel her back petal by pretty petal and drink her nectar until I was drunk.
I didn’t give her a chance to pull back from the kiss. I pulled her back, gripping the nape of her neck while her lips were still seeking mine. Her lipstick was smeared across her lips, faded and messy. She looked nothing like the pretty picture of innocence I was used to.
No…
Like this, she looked dirty and needy. Not in a bad way but in a way that let me know I could turn her out in the bedroom. I wanted to bend her and fuck her and fill her mouth with every inch of my dick. I wanted to eat her pussy until she became a river and I was parched earth. I wanted every hole she had. I wanted her to beg me to stretch her until she would only fit me.
A knot thickened in my throat thinking of all the things I could do to her. All the things I would do to her. There was no more wiggle room. No more professionalism. All of that flew out of the window.
“Dammit,” she whined. I let her neck go and she blinked up at me, still bewildered.
Whiskey and Regret Page 13
