by Marie Force
“Don’t feel sick, Jenny. Who knows better than I do what you’ve been through? I’d never begrudge you the happiness you so deserve.”
“Thank you for that. It means a lot. You have no idea how much.”
“So you really threw tomatoes at him?”
“I really did,” Jenny said with a laugh. “He woke me up!” She didn’t mention that he’d woken her out of a dream about Toby.
“Then I suppose he deserved it.”
“I hit him smack in the middle of his back.”
Erin’s laughter was a welcome sound. “I love it.”
“Luckily, he decided to forgive me. We’re having fun together.”
“It’s great to hear you sounding so happy.”
“How about you? Any new prospects?”
“No one worth throwing tomatoes at.”
“Are you trying, Er? Do you get out?”
“Sometimes. Other times, it’s just too much trouble.”
“I know that feeling,” Jenny said. She knew it all too well. “But you can’t jumpstart your life if you spend most of it hiding out.”
“You’re right. I know you’re right. It’s just knowing and doing can be two different things.”
“You should come out here for a visit. Alex has a very handsome and very single brother you might like to meet.”
“Subtle, Jenny,” Erin said with a laugh. “Very subtle.”
“Will you think about coming to visit? It’s been too long since we’ve seen each other.”
“I’ll try. I’d love to see your island and your lighthouse.”
They chatted for another few minutes about the news in Toby’s family before Erin said she had to run to a birthday party for her best friend’s son.
“Thanks for calling,” Jenny said. “It’s always so great to hear from you.”
“I’m so glad to hear about your Alex. I hope he makes you very happy for a very long time.”
“Thank you,” Jenny said softly. “Love you.”
“Love you, too.”
Following the conversation with Erin, Jenny was filled with restless energy and decided to go outside to check on her garden while she waited for Alex. It had been great to hear from Erin, as always. The two of them had been close friends since the day Toby first introduced them, and had supported each other through the darkness after they lost him.
While she treasured her friendship with Erin and her close relationship with Toby’s entire family, hearing from Erin was always a reminder of what had been lost. It took her back to that awful day and the frantic calls from his family in Pennsylvania. Having to tell them he’d called, that he was in the building, that he was above where the plane had hit… She’d never forget their anguish or how it had added to hers.
Jenny hated to admit that she’d put a tiny bit of distance between herself and her old friend since she moved to Gansett. In bad need of a fresh start, she’d tried to put the past where it belonged, but doing that meant seeing less of the people she loved.
It was probably time to bridge that gap, and she hoped Erin would take her up on the invitation to come visit.
In the mudroom, she grabbed a metal bucket and headed out to harvest her tomatoes and the bumper crop of cucumbers. As usual on bright summer weekend days, the lighthouse grounds were crawling with tourists checking out the cliffs and the beach down below.
Sometimes she interacted with the visitors, other times she kept to herself. Today, she wasn’t in the mood to answer a million questions about the lighthouse and what it was like to live there, so she went about her work in the garden until someone called out her name.
She turned to find Jared James approaching her. Behind him, she noticed a black Porsche parked in the lot. He wore dark sunglasses along with shorts and a T-shirt. Other than the car, nothing about his appearance indicated his extreme wealth.
“Hi, Jared. Nice to see you.”
“You, too. Great place you’ve got here.”
His teasing grin made her smile. “It’s the best view in the world.” With her bucket full to overflowing with tomatoes and cucumbers, she gestured to the door to the mudroom. “Want a tour?”
“I’d love one.”
She took him inside and up to the first level, where he marveled at how compact and cozy the living space was. Upstairs in the combined bedroom and bathroom, he couldn’t get enough of her view.
“Did you paint this?” he asked of the canvas on an easel.
“I dabble. I haven’t worked on it in weeks. There’s so much other stuff to do here in the summer.”
“What’s it like in the winter?”
“Desolate and quiet. I actually welcome the change of pace after the craziness of the summer. My friends keep me busy and engaged, but I like coming back to my quiet lighthouse.”
“I wondered about you,” Jared said, glancing at the photo of Toby on the bedside table. “I didn’t know you well in school, but I knew Toby was engaged, and I wondered what had become of you.”
“Nothing worth writing home about. It’s been a very long and difficult journey.”
“Toby and I were acquaintances more than friends, and his death hit me very hard, so I can’t begin to know what it must’ve been like for you.”
“Did you know anyone else who died that day?”
“A couple of people I knew through work. Even all these years later, sometimes it’s hard to believe that it actually happened. It was so surreal, and New York afterward was such a different place for a very long time.”
“I’ll have to take your word for it. The first year is a bit of a blur for me. I was home in North Carolina for most of it.”
“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to dredge up unhappy memories.”
“It’s fine. It’s easier to talk about than it used to be, and I always enjoy meeting people who remember Toby fondly.”
“He was an awesome guy. I enjoyed him very much.”
“Me, too.” Mindful of the fact that Alex would be arriving soon and wouldn’t appreciate finding Jared in her bedroom, she led the way downstairs and offered him a cold drink.
“I’d love some water.”
“Coming right up.” She fixed glasses of ice water for both of them and joined him on the sofa. “So you said you were taking some time off this summer?”
He nodded, his gaze fixed on the icy glass. “Very bad and very unexpected breakup.”
“I’m sorry.” She looked over at him. “If you want to talk about it, I’m a pretty good listener.” The poor guy looked like he could use a friend. She no sooner had that thought when she chuckled to herself at the characterization of Jared James the billionaire being a poor anything. But even billionaires could get their hearts broken.
“It’s pretty simple, actually. She couldn’t handle the money or the lifestyle that goes along with it.”
As his words registered, Jenny stared at him. “She couldn’t handle the money.”
“That’s what she said when I proposed and she turned me down.”
“Wow.” Jenny blew out a deep breath.
“I knew she could be a bit squirrely about the luxury, the gifts, the benefits, the largeness of my life, but I thought she loved me enough to get past all that. I’ve spent the last few weeks trying to figure out a way to get rid of all the money.”
“You shouldn’t have to do that. If someone loves you, truly loves you, they love everything about you. If you have to change who you are to accommodate her, then she’s not the one for you.”
“So I’ve been told, and intellectually, I agree. Emotionally, however…”
“You grieve.”
“More so than I ever have over anything, which may sound sort of melodramatic to someone who’s been through what you have.”
“A loss is a loss no matter how it happens. Does she know you’re so crushed over this?”
“I haven’t talked to her since she ended it. She’s texted a few times, but I haven’t replied.”
“Maybe if s
he knew how upset you are it would make a difference.”
“I’m sure she knows. She was fully aware of how totally in love with her I was. I am.”
“I’m so sorry, Jared. That’s just such an awful situation.”
“Isn’t it ironic?” he said with a small smile. “And here I thought money bought happiness.”
Jenny smiled at his attempt at levity, and her heart gave a happy leap when she heard Alex’s heavy footsteps on the metal stairs.
“Hey, baby,” he was saying as he arrived at the landing. “Are you ready?” He took one look at Jenny sitting on the sofa with Jared, and his smile became a scowl. “Am I interrupting something?”
“Nothing more than a visit with an old friend,” Jenny said with a pointed look. She wanted to say, Stand down, tiger.
“I should get going,” Jared said, probably sensing the tension pouring off Alex in nearly visible waves. “Thanks for the tour and the ear. I appreciate it.”
“We’re having a party out here later,” she said. “You should come. I’ll introduce you to some fun people and get your mind off your troubles for a little while.”
“Are you sure no one would mind?”
“Of course not. Our motto is the more the merrier.”
“That sounds like fun. I’ll stop by.”
“Great.” She walked him to the stairs, all the while ignoring Alex’s glare.
“Alex,” Jared said, extending a hand. “Nice to see you again.”
“Yeah, you, too.” He shook Jared’s hand reluctantly, or so it seemed to Jenny.
“I can see myself out,” Jared said. “Thanks again, Jenny.”
A heavy silence hung over the room until they heard the mudroom door close behind Jared.
Chapter 21
As soon as the door closed, Jenny turned to face Alex. “Ready to go?”
“Was he in your bedroom?”
Stunned by the angry tone of his voice, she said, “What?”
“You heard me. Did you take him upstairs?”
“I showed him the lighthouse, which includes the upstairs. We talked about Toby and the girlfriend who dumped Jared because she couldn’t deal with his wealth. That was about the extent of it. Should I have recorded the conversation so you could hear the full playback?”
“I can’t believe you took him into your bedroom.”
“I can’t believe you’re acting like a jealous fool when nothing happened.”
His shoulders slumped, and he shook his head. “I can’t believe it either. I don’t know what the hell is wrong with me where you’re concerned, but seeing you sitting there with another guy… I wanted to beat the shit out of him.”
“I’m really glad you didn’t do that.”
“Sorry.” He ran his hands through his hair, his frustration nearly palpable.
Jenny went to him and flattened her hands on his chest. “What are we going to do about this little problem of yours? I’m not going to stand for you flipping out every time I talk to another guy.”
“I know.”
“Soooo…”
“I’m crazy about you,” he said gruffly, his hands falling from his hair to her shoulders. “And that’s making me crazy. If that makes any sense at all.”
Touched by the worry she heard in his voice, she said, “It does, but you have to know you’re the only one I want. You’re the only one I’ve truly wanted since I lost Toby. There’s no one else but you.”
“Will you keep telling me that and forgive me when I act like a jealous ass?”
“Sure. I can do that. It’s kind of cute when your dark-chocolate eyes go green, but make no mistake, it won’t be cute if you make a scene over me having guy friends. I had a nice time with Jared just now. He’s going through a tough time, and I plan to follow up with him in a few days to see how he’s doing. I enjoyed talking to someone who knew Toby and remembers him with affection. I refuse to apologize for that.”
“I get it. You shouldn’t have to apologize.”
“And I’m also not going to be happy if you can’t be nice to my friends because you think they shouldn’t be allowed to talk to me.”
“I won’t do that. I don’t know where this is coming from. I’ve never felt this way before. About all of it—you, other guys paying attention to you, the way I want to be with you all the time, the crazy way you make me feel. It’s new to me. I’m out of sorts over you.”
“I don’t want you out of sorts. I want you comfortable and secure that what we have is special and that I feel the same way you do.”
His hands traveled from her shoulders, down her back and below the hem of her cover-up. He cupped her bottom, drawing a sharp gasp from her.
“I thought we were going surfing.”
Tipping his head, he made her shiver with the light brush of his lips on her neck. “We are. Eventually. I need you so bad. So fucking bad. You have no idea. And not just like this.” He squeezed her ass for emphasis. “Everywhere. All the time. I need you.”
“Alex,” she said on a sigh. “You have me. I’m right here, and I’m all yours.”
“Yes, you’re mine.” He tugged on the ties to her bikini bottoms, and the fabric dropped between her feet. His fingers caressed her sex, sliding through the dampness, teasing and tormenting as his mouth came down on hers, hard and demanding.
In no time at all, he had her clinging to the edge of sanity as he completely dominated her senses. When he removed his fingers, she cried out from the loss until he freed himself from the board shorts he’d worn for the beach and lifted her onto his erection.
Jenny slid down on him, taking him in one deep thrust that made her head fall back and her mouth open in a silent scream. The pleasure was nearly unbearable. And then he leaned her against the wall and began to thrust into her.
“I was with someone,” he said against her ear without missing a beat on the pace of his possession. “For two years. She had guy friends. Lots of them, and I didn’t give a shit. I was never jealous, because I didn’t love her. I know that now. I didn’t love her.”
His words and actions made for a powerful combination.
“I love you,” he whispered.
Overcome with the emotion and swept away by desire, Jenny could barely think, let alone speak. But she knew he needed the words from her. “I love you, too.”
He pushed hard into her, coaxing her with his fingers. “Come with me.”
Jenny was so close that all he had to do was touch her once. She held on tight to him as he rode wave after wave of her release and then let himself go, too. It went on forever, or so it seemed.
“I’m sorry for being an ass.” His lips and whiskers rubbing on her collarbone ignited her all over again.
“I forgive you.”
“It’s your fault anyway.”
“How do you figure?”
“I was never this way until I met you.”
Laughing, Jenny tightened her arms around him, wanting to hold on to him forever. Was he perfect? Far from it, but it seemed he might be perfect for her. “How about this surfing you promised me?”
He withdrew from her slowly and settled her on her feet. Cupping her face in his big hands, he kissed her and gazed into her eyes for a long moment, seeming as dazed as she felt. “Let’s go.”
* * *
Grace was running late. The pharmacy had been unusually busy on that Saturday afternoon, and there went her plans to scoot out early to go help set up for the party.
She ran up the stairs to the apartment, planning to shower, change and get to the lighthouse. She’d been distracted all day, thinking about Evan, their wedding plans, the situation with Buddy and the album, the studio, the pharmacy she’d bought just over a year ago and how it now felt like an anchor around her neck.
If only she hadn’t invested so much to buy the place, she’d be able to travel with him while he promoted his music. But she was stuck on Gansett for the foreseeable future. It made her sad to feel “stuck” in a place she loved so much
, but the idea of being left behind while he went out on tour for months on end made her feel sick. She missed him already, and he hadn’t even left yet.
Under the warm spray of the shower, she tried to let go of the anxiety and worries so she could focus on the evening with Evan and their friends. They had today together as well as tomorrow and the next day. There was no point to obsessing about what might happen months down the road. But even as she told herself that, the knot of anxiety in her belly refused to let up.
The shower door opened, and Grace let out a squeak of surprise when Evan stepped in behind her, his arms encircling her waist as he brought her in close to him.
“Where did you come from?” she asked.
His hands and lips were all over her. “Work.” Against her back, Grace felt the hard pressure of his erection.
“Evan… I don’t have time. I have to get to Jenny’s.”
“I only need a minute.”
“It never takes you only a minute.”
“Why, thank you.”
Grace laughed at the male satisfaction she heard in his tone. She had absolutely nothing to compare him to, but she knew there was no comparing what she felt for him to anything else she’d ever known.
“I have good news for you.”
At that, her heart actually lurched. “What is it?”
“I’ll tell you in a minute.” He pressed gently on her shoulders, urging her to lean forward. When he had her arranged the way he wanted her, he grasped her hips and surged into her from behind.
Grace remembered the first time they’d done this, and the shock of how incredible it had felt then. It was no less incredible after all the time they’d spent together.
“God, nothing in the whole world feels this good,” he said.
She kept her hands flat against the shower wall as the water beat down upon them and he filled her to capacity. In all her wildest dreams, she never could’ve imagined Evan McCarthy and the joy he brought to her life. The reminder that he’d be leaving her brought tears to her eyes as he kept up the relentless pace.
