by Stacy M Wray
I remember that day well. I practically didn’t have time to be scared, the way Reed yanked me out of my hideaway. But the part that stands out the most about that day was the way Reed kissed me like he almost lost me forever. Damn, but that was a memorable kiss. Warmth creeps along my skin at the memory.
“So…that’s where I was – just out driving. Sorry if I scared you.”
It floors me that I didn’t know this about him. Shouldn’t I have?
“Maybe, you should see a doctor, Reed. Maybe, you could get something prescribed to help you sleep.”
He’s shaking his head before I even finish my sentence. “No, babe – no pills. I don’t want them. It’s just who I am now. It doesn’t get in the way of life. I function perfectly fine on just a few hours of sleep. It is what it is.” I simply nod, knowing he’s not going to cave.
“Hey,” he says, tucking an errant strand of hair behind my ear, “what do you say to renting a boat this weekend and spending the day on the lake?”
I love being on the water. Especially as the sun slips from its rightful place in the sky, leaving a path of magnificent hues of blues and oranges across the horizon. “Won’t it be a little chilly this time of year?” But I already know I don’t care. I need a day filled with nothing but Reed, fresh air, and solitude. It’s been a crazy week.
“So, we’ll bundle up. I’ll pack us lots of food, blankets, and whatever else you want. What do you say?”
“Sounds perfect.” A huge yawn escapes me, and I tell him, “You may function fine on little sleep, but I don’t. I’m going back to bed. Coming?”
“Right behind you.”
He strips off his clothes as he walks down the hall, finally pulling his jeans off before he slips under the covers beside me. Tucking me into the side of his body, my head finds the spot just below his shoulder that seems to be made for me. I feel his soft breaths on the top of my head as he finally wins the battle against his insomnia.
I follow right behind him.
*****
We’re gifted with beautiful sunshine, which helps keep the temperatures a bit above normal on this carefree Saturday. Just as he promised, Reed and I head out into the open vastness of Lake Michigan. The wind whips around us, almost burning my cheeks. I turn in my seat to watch him behind the wheel and our eyes meet. They speak to me without words as he braces his body against the choppy water, willing himself to remain steady. I can’t help but smile at him as I think about all we’ve been through to be where we are today.
He returns the smile, and it melts my insides. Long gone are the days Reed has that boulder on his shoulder, anger following him around like a menacing shadow. I think back to the day we met and can’t believe how far he’s come. He was so rude toward me, but I can hardly blame him. He was thrust out of the only world he knew, smack dab in the middle of a farm in Nowhere, Indiana.
And I thank my lucky stars that he was.
I’m not sure how much time passes. I’m mesmerized by the never-ending water that blends into the horizon, only noticing one more boat out this far. I’m invigorated by the crisp, cool air blowing through my hair. Comforting rays of the sun battle the chill caused by the wind.
Reed bolts me out of my bubble when I hear him kill the engine.
It’s deathly quiet now; there’s only the sound of the water brushing up against the side of the boat, still choppy from the vigor of the blades from the boat’s engine.
“Makes you feel small, doesn’t it?” he asks as he takes a seat beside me on the bench, wrapping his arms around me. I merely nod, not wanting to retreat from the trance of the moment.
“You warm enough?”
I turn to him. “Plenty.” The horizon calls to me again, and I can’t stop from staring. I feel like I’m intruding on something so exquisite.
Reed wiggles in closer, his lips to my ear. “It’s so peaceful here.” I feel his gaze upon me as he adds, “I think I’ve fallen in love.”
“I know what you mean.” The view is simply breathtaking.
Shifting his body to me, he swallows slowly, his eyes darting back and forth between mine. “Not talking about the lake, Harper – I’m talking about you.” With his eyes closing momentarily, I finally realize that we’re having a moment – a big one. “I love you so fucking much…I don’t know why I haven’t told you before.” His gaze drops and my heart melts. This is hard for him. And I get it – I do. He has felt so unworthy when it comes to love, and I hate that his parents did such a number on him. I tell him I love him all the time, trying to make up for that fact. But the love he gave has been thrown back in his face time and time again, and I don’t blame him for being scared.
I cup his face in my hands. “I’ve always known, Reed. Even when you couldn’t say it…I still knew.”
His eyes drift to my mouth, and he presses his lips to mine in a frenzied kiss, a kiss filled with so much emotion that it brings tears to my eyes. I love this man so much. I always thought “soulmates” was a corny expression people tossed around to add drama to a story, but I get it now. Reed and I fit like two puzzle pieces, and I can’t imagine a life without him, now that we’re together. Sometimes, I’m scared that I might lose him; that he will disappear like he did before. I will fight for us until the day I die. Make no mistake about that.
“I will always love you,” he whispers against my lips. “It’s only ever been you, Harper.”
To make him a little more comfortable, I tease, “You never fell in love when we were apart?”
His eyes remain serious when he answers, “Well, yeah, I guess I did.”
My heart drops into my stomach. I didn’t expect him to say that.
“Oh,” is all I can manage.
“I fell in love with a four-foot scrappy kid with messy sandy hair and a personality that won me over instantly. His name is Jacob Bently.”
My eyebrows scrunch in confusion as Reed chuckles, clearly knowing how uncomfortable his response made me, at first. He proceeds to tell me the story about how he met Jacob, the day he dropped in on his friend, Kylie. He told me how there was an invisible pull to the kid and how he couldn’t stay away, how they’ve been friends for over a year. The way his face lights up as he describes his small friend warms me from the inside out, despite the chill in the air.
I didn’t think it was possible to fall more in love with him.
But I just did.
He pulls me into his lap and holds me close, his face buried in the slope just above my shoulder. Peppering my neck with small kisses and nibbles, a chill crawls up my spine, along with his hands. They glide across my skin, and I feel my body sink into his. I’m so thankful that we’re alone for this moment.
I feel like the luckiest girl alive.
How many times had I almost given up hope? Hope that he would return to me. Hope that Mr. H’s words weren’t just some fairy tale I’d been clinging to, as if I were a little girl who still believed in Prince Charming.
No, I kept faith in the connection that we shared. I knew it wasn’t something mustered up from my wild imagination. Deep down, I knew he wasn’t toying with me, although, sometimes, it felt that way.
“I have always loved you, Reed Faulkner,” I whisper into his ear.
“I never thought that I was deserving, ya know? But I’m so fucking grateful you do,” he whispers back.
A huge gust of wind blows past us, causing my hair to wildly wrap around our heads. We both laugh as we attempt to untangle ourselves from my locks. In an instant, the wind is gone.
“That was weird,” he says, as he locks eyes with mine.
Goosebumps prickle my flesh, thinking Mr. H is watching over us, but I don’t say anything in fear that I’ll sound goofy.
I keep the belief to myself as I smile at him. “I’m hungry, mister. You gonna feed me or what?”
He carefully stands to grab the basket of food we’d prepared earlier. I find myself wishing that we could stay out here forever, in this tiny sphere of the world with ou
r names written all over it.
But I realize that’s not possible.
Besides, we’ve got a great life waiting on us.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Reed
March 2018
“Reed! Watch this!” Jacob punts the football a good distance. The ball spirals as his friend, Jimmy, runs backward, attempting to catch it. The ball meets the earth, and Jimmy appears embarrassed that he didn’t snag it from the air.
When Jacob looks over, I give him a thumbs-up. The smile he bestows upon me hits me deep in my chest. I wonder how I’m going to shelter this kid from all the shit the world has to offer him. It’s a thought I struggle with daily, as our bond becomes tighter and tighter.
Running over to me, his grin only widens. “You just might have me beat in the football department,” I tell him, my fist meeting the top of his arm in a playful punch.
His face distorts into a wince as my heart nearly stops. I barely tapped him.
“Jacob?” He takes a step back, not liking the question in my voice. “Come here, bud.”
He keeps his feet planted where they are, pleading with his eyes for me to drop it. There’s no fucking way I’m about to pretend this didn’t just happen.
“Jacob.” My voice is sterner than I’d like – I don’t want to scare him. “It’s okay. Really. I just want to look.”
His head hangs in shame as he takes the couple of steps to stand in front of me. I reach for the sleeve of his shirt and gently push it up the length of his arm. Rage fills me as I see the bluish-green marks on his bicep. The image of strong fingers digging into this kid’s flesh is obvious.
I take a deep breath and count to ten inside my head, a trick that I still need from time to time. “I’m assuming your other arm matches this one.”
He doesn’t answer me, only stares into my eyes, quietly asking me to let this go.
The question leaves my lips before I even have time to contemplate the thoughts rolling through my head. “Did your mom do this?”
Shock passes his sweet face, and his eyes widen. “No.”
And I believe him. I didn’t think she would, but I had to ask.
It doesn’t take long for me to realize who it could’ve been. Just a few nights ago, on one of my midnight drives, I found myself planted in front of Jacob’s house, keeping vigil like his own damn personal guard. During my watch, I got to witness his mom in action again with a new man. Even from the distance of my car to the front door, I could tell he was a slimy douchebag. Once they were inside, I got out and took down his license plate number, knowing I’d have my eyes and ears, Doug, investigate him.
Just yesterday, Doug phoned me with his information. Turns out that he’s some hot-shot real estate developer, living in a gated community with a wife and two kids. Figures. I realized he must be the new chump that Miranda’s trying to milk for some cash. Doesn’t she get how dangerous this game is?
“Was it someone from your class?” He looks around the playground as my eyes follow his. I know damn well it wasn’t – everyone loves him. And that kid, Bryan the Bully, moved away months ago. He has no enemies at school. When his eyes meet mine again, he shakes his head slowly.
“It was your mom’s new friend, wasn’t it?” His eyes grow cold with fear, and I know I have my answer. I’m not going to make him talk about it. I know damn well that motherfucker threatened him from the way his small body trembles in front of me.
I pull him close and give him a gentle hug. “It’s okay, buddy. You don’t have to say anything.”
Some of the tension releases from his body as he sinks into my embrace. But, just as quickly, he untangles himself from my arms, and I know he doesn’t want the other kids to see him.
I want to ask him more questions, but Kylie stands up from across the playground and announces it’s time for their math test. Groans can be heard from all over as she smiles, waving at me before she rounds up the kids.
I have a visit to make, anyway.
*****
After having another chat with Doug, I jot down the address of the offices of the asshole who hurt Jacob. The fury in my belly grows as I try to contain it.
Just when I feel like punching something, my phone rings and the ringtone immediately calms me. Harper.
I tap the icon on my phone. “Hey, love. You’ve got perfect timing.”
Her gentle laugh tumbles through my phone, and it settles in the cavity of my chest, instantly relaxing my thoughts. “Oh? What did I interrupt?”
Just me about to lose it.
“Just caught me between errands, that’s all.” I stare at my almost-illegible handwriting of that asshole’s workplace, battling the good of Harper and the evil of that man. But then, I finally tear my eyes away from the fresh ink, giving all my attention to the voice on the other end of the line.
“Well, I’m afraid I’m not calling with good news. My study group wants to meet tonight at eight. I’m afraid it’s going to be a late one.”
I know how much her education means to her, and I always try my hardest not to give her grief about it. She hung in there for me when I didn’t deserve her patience, and I’m not about to forget that any time soon. Still, the thought of her not beside me at night leaves me empty. I’ve grown so used to her body nestled up against mine as a balm to all the shit we’ve endured.
“Then, stay at your place tonight, okay? I don’t want you driving out to mine when it’s late and you’re tired.” I mean the words, but I’ll still miss the fuck out of her.
“I don’t know. I’ll see how late it is. I hate the nights when we’re apart.”
Not as much as I do.
“Me too. But I worry about you, Harper. You’re always so wiped at the end of the day. Just use your good sense, okay? Promise me.”
She sighs into the phone. “Yeah. Okay, I promise. I’ll text you and let you know.”
“Alright. I love you. Never forget it.” The words come so easily now, and I never tire of saying them, knowing the look she gets in her eyes when she hears them. I never knew a love like this could ever exist. Not for me, anyway.
“I never do, Reed. I love you too. I’ll keep in touch.”
When the call ends, I look at the crumpled piece of paper in my hand, not realizing I crunched it in my fist as I was talking to Harper. Smoothing it out on the seat, I punch the address into my phone and start my car.
Goddamn motherfucker.
I arrive twenty minutes later at some fancy offices nestled in a park-like setting. Maple trees line the long drive, their leaves beginning to show a tinge of red along the edges. Scanning the numbers on the brick surface of the individual buildings, I finally spot the one I’m looking for. I pull into a nearby space, my knuckles still tight around the steering wheel.
I pull in a cleansing breath as I attempt to remain calm.
Swinging my door open, I climb out and make the short walk to the glass double doors. Gold-etched letters indicate I’m in the right spot.
I pass through and find a young girl sitting behind a tall counter. “May I help you?” She’s all flirty, and I’m not in the mood.
“Here to see Mr. Rutker.”
The girl glances down at her computer. “And you are…?”
“You won’t find my name. Just point me in the right direction.” I should have known I’d have to get past this bullshit.
As I stand waiting, the strong aroma of cinnamon wafts around me. I step back in search of the source. Finally, I see that it’s a brown stick broom leaning in the corner. I move in the opposite direction, hoping to lose the unwanted scent.
She looks up, confused. “I’m sorry, sir, but you need to have…” She stands as I walk around the counter, not caring she’s on my heels, calling after me. “Sir, you need to stop. If you’ll just –”
His name is on the first door – what a gift. My hand grips the doorknob as the girl places hers on my upper arm. I yank it off and pass through. A bewildered Jim Rutker stands behind his desk, w
aving the girl off as he approaches me.
“It’s alright, Kimmy. I’ll take care of this.” Then, turning his attention to me, he demands, “What has you barging into my office uninvited? Hmm?”
Heat pours through my veins as I envision the marks on Jacob’s little arms. “You like picking on small kids, Mr. Rutker?” My words come out in a snarl. It takes everything I have not to punch him before he even answers me.
His brows furrow, as if he has no idea what I’m talking about. “I think you’ve wandered into the wrong place, fella. I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.”
I think about bringing up Miranda, but I’m not certain she goes by her real name when she’s trying to hustle these dickheads. “Oh no? You can’t tell me you didn’t put your hands on a young boy in a tiny white house on Holden Street?”
His face drains of all color, and I know I’ve got him – he knows the house.
I hear a small commotion gathered in the hallway. The door is still ajar. Not caring, I continue, “If I ever hear about or see another mark on that boy, I will make damn sure you won’t be signing anymore slimy real estate contracts. You catch my drift?”
The snake switches his shocked reaction to that of contempt. “You’ve got the wrong fella, mister. Now, if you’ll kindly remove yourself from the premises before I contact the authorities to do so.”
He doesn’t fool me – I notice his shaken demeanor, even if he is putting on a good show.
“There’ll be no need for that. I’ve said what I came to say.” I stick my finger in his face. “I meant every word I said.”
He practically growls at me as I turn away from him. I pass a few gawking eavesdroppers as I head for the exit, not caring in the slightest.
Thankful for the fresh air, instead of that fake cinnamon shit, I stand on the sidewalk outside. I take a deep breath, inhaling the crisp air. Then, I count to ten before walking toward my car.
