by Heath Pfaff
I would tell Malice, but I wasn't sure about the others. Maybe once I'd told Malice, she would have some insight into what I should do. She had a way of seeing things that I could not.
A woman's scream of pain tore through the night air. I leapt into motion, following the direction the sound had come from, centering on it with my enhanced hearing. There was no follow up sound, but I didn't need another one. I knew which direction to run. I dashed forward, using my enhanced speed and strength to carry me safely through the underbrush. The voice had been all too familiar. It had sounded like Telistera.
The sound had not come from the direction of the camp, and had been far closer to me than it should have been. What was Telistera doing out in the woods? I drove myself onward, Kay not forgotten, but placed away until I had time to discuss all that had happened with Malice. Telistera needed my help, and I would not let myself be distracted by phantoms in the night. I would find Kay, but I could not let what had happened distract me. Others still depended upon me.
"Noble!" A voice yelled, coming from the same direction as had the scream before.
"Lowin, where are you?!" Malice's voice called, also coming from the same place, not far ahead. I broke through the brush of the forest and came out into a small, grassy clearing. I came to a stop. The scene before me was terrible.
Hungering bodies littered the ground, ten or more. Tower, Snow, Silver, and Malice stood, swords drawn, also in the clearing, though I noted none of their weapons glistened with blood. Their eyes fell upon me as I broke the tree line, but in truth I only barely noticed them. I came into the clearing only a few feet from the fallen form of Telistera. The woman's body lay torn from neck to waist, her insides sprawled across the grass. Her hair was no longer silver. It had faded to a dull black, stained red in places by her own blood, and her eyes, transfixed open, were a shade of brown with the empty gaze of the dead. A few feet away from her, my eyes fixed on another horror.
Ethaniel lay in a pool of quickly expanding blood, Telistera's lance protruding from his torso, near his heart. He was still alive, blood sputtering from between his lips as he thrashed about on the ground. As I watched, darkness seemed to pour from the top of his head, as if those gray smoky eyes of his were suddenly dripping out all of the vile void they'd contained. I reached for a sword that wasn't there, and took an involuntary step backwards. The others were doing the same, though they had swords, and held them at the ready. All eyes were now on Ethaniel and whatever it was that was seeping from him.
The smoke began to coalesce, forming into the vague shape of a man-like-creature, though black, and flowing, skeletal in appearance. Its eyes turned on us, and I recognized them as the eyes that Ethaniel had worn for so many years. I realized in that moment that I was looking upon the shadowlyn in its true form. The demon, a creature that should have been dead, was pulling itself out of Ethaniel's body as the man lay on the ground, bleeding out.
The shadowlyn stared at us all, its dark eyes piercing like barbed arrows, and not one of us moved to do anything. The scene before us was too unreal, too horrifying, for us to react in any way other than stunned silence. In a flash the dark thing spun about and vanished, slipping back into the woods and out of our line of sight. I was prepared to chase after it, but Ethaniel's voice stopped me.
"Lowin, by all that you love in the world, Lowin, please, come here quickly." The old Knight's voice was weak, shaky, but insistent. I wasn't sure what I wanted to do. Telistera lay dead, killed by either the claws of Ethaniel, or the claws of the Hungering, and the shadowlyn, a creature I felt was inescapably tied to the events that had transpired, was getting away. The other Knights seemed as confused as I.
I don't know why I did it, but I walked over to the old Knight. I believe it was his voice that compelled me, the desperate tone of a man who needed to be heard one more time. Looking at him, I knew that he would not be recovering from the wound Telistera inflicted. His heart was pierced. If not for the lance plugging the wound, he would have died already. He was wrecked; his once proud features were caked in blood, sweat, and dirt. I knelt at his side. The dark eyes on his forehead were gone, and when I looked upon him, for the first time in as long as I could remember, I saw the glint of blue in his black eyes. I saw in him the fatherly figure I had first seen at Fell Rock so many years before. Lying before me in a pool of his own blood was the lost Ethaniel.
"Lowin. . ." He reached out to me. His bloody hand was clutched around something. I held my own hand out and he unlocked his grasp and dropped a glowing blue crystal into my palm. I was about to jump back, and yell at the dying man in anger, but he grabbed my wrist and held firm. I was still angry, and disgusted that he would bring forth that hated crystal again, but I held my place. It would have been easy enough to tear my hand from his grip if I'd wanted to.
"Listen, don't have long . . . so much to say." He sputtered the words, blood forming in frothy puddles at the corners of his mouth. "I've done so much wrong. . . The shadowlyn drove me. At first I was in control, but it all slipped away from me." He said, and tears formed in his eyes. He blinked them away, and I saw his resolve firming. His breathing was ragged.
"Must keep the crystal, don't throw it away. The only way you can save her, Lowin. They wanted it back . . . were going to . . ." He coughed and blood misted into the air. "They were going to take it back, Telistera found us." Despair swept over his face again. "I killed her, Lowin, I can never be forgiven. I've killed so many, everyone who knew about us. . ." His words trailed off as more frothy blood filled his mouth. "I went back and killed them. There will be no more Knights . . . terrible things. I've done terrible. . ." His face contorted in pain, and he grew even paler than he had been before.
I was confused. He was saying so much, and it didn't all make sense to me at the time. "Who am I trying to save, Ethaniel?" I asked, trying to press for more information.
The Knights had gathered around. We all stood transfixed in confusion, horror, and sadness. Ethaniel's eyes locked on mine, and his face filled with torment. "You must cut a hole into the heart of a strong Knight . . . pierce the crystal into the still beating flesh." He spoke in bursts, his words coming between convulsions of pain. The old Knight's body shook violently, and I thought for a minute he was going to die, but his grip on my wrist tightened. "Pierce the heart. It will break the binding, kills the Knight who does it, but breaks the binding. Must be a Knight. . . The only way . . . knowledge is forbidden. It's my only secret . . . my only . . . I've betrayed you all so many times." He smiled wanly. "I kept that secret though . . . that one secret."
His eyes fixed on mine, his grip tightened. "I'm such a monster, Lowin. We cast you into the fire, and drew you back, to make you strong but. . . I think I'm going to die." He whispered the last phrase, and the light faded from his eyes. His head fell backwards, and Ethaniel was no more. The first of the Knights was gone in a moment so fast, and so shocking, that it didn't even seem real.
His words immediately struck a chord in my memory. Cast the vessel into the fire, draw it free, cast it in once more. This is how we make it strong. Those words had once been spoken to me by a dying Hungering soldier. Ethaniel's words had echoed them too closely. What did they mean? What had Ethaniel been trying to tell me in the end?
We stood amidst a field of death. The Hungering and our two companions lay broken and ruined. I didn't know what to make of Ethaniel's final words, but obviously they had been important to him. I held the blue crystal in my palm, and replayed his words in my head. Was it possible to break my tie to the Uliona woman by piercing my own heart with the blue crystal I held in my hand? Could I give back the life I was taking? It would mean my own life, if Ethaniel's words were true.
A resolution was forming in my mind. Once I'd gotten Kay back safely, I would free the Uliona from her bond, and give her back the life I'd been taking from her. I would get Kay back first, but once that was done, I would do what was necessary. Ethaniel had said it would kill me, but in the end, I did not
truly deserve to live as I was. I was no longer human. I had become a monster, and was growing more so every day. Maybe in redeeming one life, I could leave a legacy worth remembering. I felt a hand on my shoulder, and noticed that Snow was at my side. How long had she been there? I hadn't noticed her moving so close. She stepped away as I stood up from Ethaniel's corpse.
I took the blue glowing crystal and stowed it in my pack. The other Knights stood in silence, and I knew they were waiting for me to say something, to make some decision regarding what had just happened. I wasn't sure what I could do or say to help them cope with all that had transpired. I was not prepared to handle all that had occurred myself.
"Let us take care of our fallen companions." I proclaimed aloud, but in my head I added ". . . again." It seemed that we buried too many dead on this journey. I walked back to Telistera and looked at the woman who had lived such a short life. She almost didn't look like the same person. Her time had been close to finished, but I did not believe she'd deserved to die as she had, killed by one of her own companions. Ethaniel had been a slave to the shadowlyn, but that hardly made it any better. What was the shadowlyn?
I felt a hand on my arm. I began to shy away, thinking it was Snow again, but it was Malice this time.
"Are you alright?" She asked. There were tears hiding behind her eyes, though I could see she was holding them back. Her eyes seemed brighter than normal, as though they were almost burning with their own light. Was it only the tears held back, I wondered?
I shook my head. "No. I don't think I am."
We buried our dead.
"What will we do now?" Silver asked as we stood at the foot of the two marked graves we'd created. The headstones were local rock, roughly etched with the names of our fallen companions. It was strange to think that the legendary Ethaniel, leader of the Knights of Ethan, who had lived for hundreds of years, would be buried in the middle of nowhere, below a poorly constructed headstone. Of course, Telistera had been a hero to her people as well, and she received no better a burial. It pained me to leave them both in such a sorry state, but there was little else we could do without spending significantly more time then we had available to us working on nicer accommodations. In the end, I knew the dead did not care.
"We will keep doing what we've been doing. Our mission has not changed. We must rescue Kaylien and stop the Hungering from posing a threat to the rest of the world." That was the first time I'd ever spoken the second part aloud. To that point I'd always claimed to be on a mission to free my daughter, but now I had admitted that there was much more to the tasks ahead of us. We would need to destroy the Hungering. It would be pointless to save Kay only to have her killed when the Hungering returned. After all, once all was done, I wouldn't be around to protect her anymore. Malice would have to take over that responsibility, but I would do my best to ease the burden.
"What about the blue crystal?" Snow spoke up, and as I took my eyes away from the graves to meet hers, I saw the same question resting in the eyes of the other Knights. They all looked concerned.
"We heard what Ethaniel said, Noble, and you did not throw the crystal away. What do you intend to do once we have settled matters with the Hungering?" Silver asked. "We have served you well. You have an obligation to tell us."
I looked to Malice. She was not speaking, but I could see the worry behind her eyes. I had not discussed anything with her yet. She knew me though, and she must have known what I was thinking.
"I intend to do what is right." I said. I did not want to have the conversation being forced on me. I had intended to tell no one of my intentions before it was time to carry them out. I didn't want to spread that burden.
". . . and what is right?" Snow asked. Her voice was strangely intense. "You didn't choose to take anyone's life, Lowin. Why should you die for them? It is a cruel world, but haven't you suffered enough?"
I shook my head. "It's not that simple. Do you think I'd make this decision lightly? I have to live with the guilt of that woman's life if I do not give it back, and it would only be worse now that I know I can stop her from dying." My reasons were selfish. I didn't want any more innocent blood on my hands. "I am a warrior, Snow, and I have lived a full life. I have loved, and brought a child into this world. I have murdered, and risen to the level of king. How could I, who have done so much, deny another the chance to have their own experiences? What kind of monster would I be to live on knowing that I could have saved an innocent?"
Snow did not answer, and I swept my eyes across those of the others. I could see the barely held back tears in Malice's eyes, but I was afraid to let my own eyes linger there. Seeing her only served to remind me of how badly I wanted to live. It seemed I had been fighting constantly since I'd joined the Knights of Ethan, and all I really wanted was to spend time with the people I loved. That would not be an option. I could feel the binding process strengthening by the hour. For some reason, perhaps because it was the second time I'd been bound, the process seemed to be moving more quickly than it had before. A Uliona woman was dying somewhere across the ocean, and I was growing stronger.
"What about Kay, what about Laouna, what about. . ." Snow spoke up again, but her words trailed off. What about who? Whose name had been on the edge of her tongue? What about me? Had she been about to ask that? Her words cut deeply, even if she didn't finish the thought. I worried about Kay and Malice. I did not want to leave them alone, but what other choice did I have? I was in a position to give an innocent woman back her life. What if that woman had been Kyeia? What if that woman was someone else's Kyeia? I could not deny her the chance to live and love as I had.
I shook my head. "Now is not the time to talk about this. We've lost more companions on our road. We should be remembering them now. We have a great distance yet to travel, and there is still a great deal of danger ahead of us. The Hungering know we're coming, and they haven't yet stood in our way. That means that we are walking into a situation they've prepared for us. That is what we should be worried about next." I was eager to change the subject. I didn't want to think so far ahead. I still had time left. I would find Kay, and I would hold my daughter once before I must face my destiny. I thought I was prepared for that.
"We're another week out from the mountains." Silver said, her voice subdued. She was allowing the subject to change, and I was thankful for that. "We should be able to make better time from here on in." She didn't add "without Telistera." It was the truth behind her statement, but it went without saying. She had been slowing us down towards the end of her life, but none of us would have ever said anything to her. She'd fought with us too long, and too hard. She'd been an excellent warrior, and a vital part of all that had transpired.
As I gave one final look at her headstone, I realized just how much I would miss the silver-eyed woman. She'd been amazing. Even weakened, she'd fought and defeated Ethaniel. I was fortunate to have had her at my side for so long. If nothing else, I was glad that she was able to return to her homeland to rest. I knew that it had been important to her.
After a few more minutes, we gathered our gear and made to leave. Of ten thousand, five, including myself, remained.
Malice came to me as the others were resting. We'd been traveling for five days straight, and had reached the base of the mountains, though we had not yet found the caves. I had decided it was best to let the others rest, for once we found the entrance to the cave system, it was difficult to say when we would next have an opportunity to sleep. I still had not slept since Ethaniel had given me the binding crystal, and I wasn't tired. I greeted Malice with a small smile, but that faltered when I saw that she looked agitated.
"Lowin, I'm bleeding." I nearly jumped up from where I was sitting but she held out a calming hand. "I'm not injured its . . ." She looked back over her shoulder at the others in the camp before sitting down closer to me, so she could speak more quietly. I didn't think it was too great an issue, as the others looked as though they'd fallen asleep. "It's a woman's blood."
&n
bsp; I was confused. "But female Knights don't. . ."
She nodded. "I know. I've been told. I talked to Snow about it, and she says there is no doubt. It started two days ago, and it hasn't stopped. There is pain, but it's not that bad. I started feeling strange after we were together last time, and then I began to bleed, a little at first, and then more. It's slowed now. I don't know what to do. Snow said I shouldn't worry, but I don't know how this can be possible. I'm scared, Lowin."
I put my arms around her shoulders and drew her close to me. I wasn't sure what to say to comfort her. All female Knights were robbed of the parts of their inner anatomy necessary for breeding. It was a terrible cruelty, but one that had been deemed necessary. The Knights had been afraid that pregnancy would weaken their stock. I did not agree. In fact, I found myself strangely happy. I kissed Laouna's cheek.
"I'm happy." I told her. She pulled back from me, her green eyes locking on mine. I could tell she was trying to decide whether or not I was being honest with her. "It means you're whole again." I added. Other than her memories, she was more a whole woman than she had been in two hundred years. I could have pretended that I didn't know why the changes had happened, but I suspected the truth. My bond with Malice, sealed by our physical intimacy, was making her stronger as I was growing stronger. That was why the color had come back to her eyes in the first place, and that was why her body was healing the ravages wrought upon it by the Knights. The body remembered what it was at its strongest, its most healthy, and hers was restoring that. At least, that is what I suspected.
"If you're happy, then I think I am too." She said, and her face lit in a smile. I kissed her again, our lips touching in serene bliss.
We made love then. It was not a beautiful romantic thing, but a quick, intimate exchange of passion and lust, handled quietly, and with as little show as possible since our companions slept only a few feet away. Malice fell asleep in my arms, but I kept my eyes open and watchful, the mountains looming overhead. I could feel time slipping away from me. Would I ever have another night like that one with Malice, I wondered? My future hovered above me like a black shadow. I held Malice tighter.
