by elda lore
“I…” He stopped.
“That’s what I thought.”
Heph’s stature grew before me. He straightened to his full height. His fists balled at his sides and his eyes narrowed. “I’ll kill him for hurting you.”
If I had a heart, it would snap in half at this brotherly outburst of protection.
“Awww, Heph. You don’t need to do that. I’m a big girl.” I dismissed the attention with a wave, but the tears swelling in my eyes betrayed me. His protectiveness and Solis’ betrayal merged together. If Solis loved me, he should be the one protecting me. A traitorous tear fell.
“Don’t cry, Vee.” Using the casual term for my name broke me. A sob escaped and I bent forward, resting my forehead against his solid chest. Awkward hands patted my back before settling in to rub hesitantly up and down my spine. I cried for Heph, Solis, Letty, and me. The world was a clusterfuck, and I didn’t want any part of it.
+ + +
An hour later, I sat on the edge of Cliff Morteum, my legs crisscrossed as I stared into the abyss of dark night and sunken valley. Off in the distance, somewhere in those lights on the opposite range, stood Zeke’s estate. I took sobering breaths of the cool air and rested back on my hands. Reflective of all I had learned the past month, thoughtful of all that transpired the last forty-eight hours, I knew it had to end. I’d reached my human limit for trauma. Afraid of heights, the irony of sitting on a cliff, looking down into a foggy valley, wasn’t lost on me. So many unknown lives under that cloud, just like the veil that covered my eyes from the truth of my being. I wasn’t one of them, but my life was intrinsically interwoven, but I did not feel special. I did not feel extraordinary. I felt plain and inconsequential and unloved. My chest hollow, the ache deep and my hand covered it, squeezing at skin that covered nothing.
“Veva.” The harsh breath exhaled behind me, and I stood rapidly. The heel of my foot rested on the edge of the cliff.
“Vee.” A hand stretched out in the dark, visible by a flashlight pointed at me. Solis stood a few feet away with Persephone and Hades at his side. The nickname from his lips felt wrong and dirty. My arms wrapped around me, and I scrubbed at them.
“Vee, honey, have you been here all this time?” Persephone stepped forward, her concerned tone warming me, but I liked the chill. I needed the cold of this mountainous air to prevent me from feeling. I didn’t want to cry anymore. I didn’t want to waste the tears.
“Don’t.” I raised both hands before me and my foot slipped back. A brush with the edge of the cliff sent pebbles tumbling downward. The sound ricocheted through the silent night, skittering toward the valley like tiny boulders.
“Oh my God, Veva. Don’t step back.” Persephone’s voice rose an octave as her hands covered her mouth in horror. Her head shook slowly side to side.
“Veva.” The soothing tone of Hades called out my name. He nearly blended with the black night in his dark attire. He stepped toward me, hand outstretched, but Persephone reached for him.
“Don’t frighten her.” Tugging on his forearm sleeve did nothing to halt his approach.
“She’s not going to do anything.” Hades spoke to me, eyes fixed on mine. “It isn’t her time.” His head dipped, understanding me.
“Veva, come to me.” Solis barked, and my connection with Hades ruptured. My head swung in his direction.
“You don’t own me, Solis. I don’t jump when you say fetch, like your other girls.”
“There aren’t any others, Veva. I’ve told you this.” His voice took on boredom as he emphasized the words.
“You told me lots of things.” I snorted. “Lies.”
“What lies, Veva? When have I lied to you?” His voice rose and rumbled out into the emptiness at my back. I love you echoed with it. I flinched at the sound, and my foot pushed back. A clump of dirt broke under my heel and my ankle gave way. I slipped, but caught myself by my outstretched arms.
“Veva,” Persephone screamed and Hades stepped closer, but so did Solis. My hands pulled forward again.
“Don’t come near me.” The fear in my voice radiated out and around us. If Solis touched me, I’d disintegrate. I’d dissolve like ashes after a fire, and blow off in the mountain wind. I didn’t trust his touch, and my skin bubbled with thoughts of his hands on me. Lies, my head screamed.
Solis stopped short, but Hades continued forward, moving at a snail’s pace. He drew closer, but my eyes remained fixed on Solis.
“Veva.” His voice strained. He stood close enough that I could see the piercing pain in his honey eyes. “Veva, please.” His eyes begged for something I could not give him: understanding.
“I don’t understand how you could do that to Letty, and do this to me.”
“What did I do…”
“I don’t understand why men can’t love me. I mean, what’s wrong with me? Why am I not enough for one man? Just one.” I shook, cutting him off without allowing him to explain. I didn’t really want answers. I wanted understanding.
“Veva, you’re more than enough. I love you. Step back from the edge.”
Shaking my head, I answered vaguely: “Do you think I can fly?”
“Oh my God! No, Veva!” Persephone cried.
“Veva.” Sternly, Hades repeated my name, shaking his head slowly.
“And what is this place where Zeke lives? Why didn’t that girl get help? If we are all part of some sick tale and this is us, someone explain it to me. Am I’m destined only to have a cheating, lying man? Do I have special powers too? Can I fly as well?” My thought rambled as did my questioning and my foot slipped on the loose edge, forcing more pebbles to fall to the valley below, scattering and plinking as they hit larger rocks in their descent.
“Veva, step away from the ledge,” Solis commanded. His voice made me flinch, and my foot slipped again. A large chunk of earth broke away under my feet. I pitched forward, but recovered my balance. Solis had taken several steps toward me, his hand outstretched for mine. Responding with a raised, flat palm, I signaled him to halt.
“Poor Letty.” My lips quivered as I said her name.
“It is sad, Vee. But it’s over.”
“How could you be so callous?”
“Callous? I feel awful for her.”
“How could you have such disregard for your child?”
Solis stopped. The flashlight in his hand dropped to the ground.
“My child?” His booming voice lowered to a rumble. A drop of rain splattered on my cheek.
“Yes. Letty and your baby.”
“Letty’s baby wasn’t mine.” His eyes opened wide before his brow pinched. “Is that what you think? That her baby was mine?”
“I don’t know what to think.” Suddenly, I questioned everything. My hands lowered to my sides. The wind picked up, and another drop of rain hit my forehead. I swiped at it before a light mist fell around us. The ground at my feet quickly softened, and the soil at my heels loosened. I rocked forward on my toes.
“Is it raining?” Hades interjected, turning to face Solis. “Stop it.”
“I’m trying,” Solis yelled back.
Several things happened at once.
Balancing on my toes, my ankles gave way. My feet fell flat, but my heels had nothing to bear my weight. The back of my feet slipped and my arms came up to catch me. My mouth opened in preparation for the descent. Persephone screamed and Solis lunged forward.
“Solis,” I cried out before my mouth could stop me. My legs kicked as I dangled with nothing under me but a valley miles below.
“Stop kicking,” Hades commanded. He’d caught my wrists.
“Don’t drop her,” Persephone’s voice shrieked, but Hades was already dragging me upward. “I told you, it isn’t your time.”
When I was level with the ledge once again, arms encircled my waist and I fell forward, landing with a heavy thump on a warm body. Those arms didn’t release me as we rolled to my back. Hands brushed feverously over my forehead.
“Are you okay? T
ell me you’re okay, Veva?” Solis’ breath blew over my face as he peppered me with questions and tender pecks over my forehead. The weight of his body crushed me, but I had no fight left to force him off me.
“I’m…” I couldn’t get the rest of the words out of me.
“Veva, why would you do this?”
I shook my head. I’d done nothing. “Slipped,” I choked out.
“I told you to stop the rain.” Hades’ voice softened to water over river rocks as he stood over us.
“I…” Solis’ eyes searched my face. “I…” His voice broke and he lowered his face to my neck. We rolled once more. Without releasing me, he sat up, tucking me against his chest as I sat cradled in his lap. My cheek pressed warmly against his chest. His mouth speaking to my hair.
“I love you, Veva. I love you. How could you do this? How could you doubt me?”
“I just came here to think.” The words came out slowly, my heart still racing and my chest ached.
“If you had gone over that cliff…” He shivered. “I would have followed you. I told you, I’d follow you wherever you go. You are the other half of me, and I can’t live without you.”
“Letty?” I whispered.
“That baby wasn’t mine. It was Zeke’s. He slept with her after me. The baby was his.”
I sat for a moment, drawing in deep breaths as the misty rain continued to wash my face and wet my hair. Solis’ arms tightened around me.
“But you slept with her. How can you be sure?”
Solis drew back at the question.
“I won’t lie. I did sleep with her, but I couldn’t finish. My thoughts were filled with you.”
I pushed back against his chest.
“Thoughts of me? While you were with another girl?”
“That didn’t come out right.”
“Oh man, shut up,” Hades groaned beside us.
“Dude, go away,” Solis barked.
“You’re burying yourself here,” Hades admonished.
“I can’t think,” Solis snapped. “I just want to hold her and make sure she’s real. She’s safe. Can’t you understand that?” Solis’ voice grew louder, and Hades lowered his head.
“Yeah,” he mouthed with a nod. He turned to face Persephone, her face streaked with silent tears. She watched me.
“Vee, I love you,” she stated. The fear in her eyes brought tears to mine. I hadn’t planned to kill myself.
“I slipped,” I repeated again. Slipped from grace, slipped from the sky, slipped from love. My head fell forward, pressing into Solis’ chest. How many mistakes I’d made, and the only person who hurt repeatedly was me. The rain continued, and my hair grew heavy with water. I shivered. Shock set in, and my body trembled. My missing heart had nowhere to beat. I felt broken and alone, despite the arms around me.
“I’m so tired, Sunshine,” I muttered.
“I’ve got you, Peacock. I’ll always have you.”
SOLIS
Relief should have filled me as Veva rested in my lap. I refused to let her go while Persephone drove my Jeep down the mountain. Instead, my thoughts raced backward over the past hours of hell searching for Veva.
God damn it all to Hades, I cursed in my head as I paced outside the door of Letty’s room. I wanted to kill my father. He made everyone his plaything, and it backfired once again. Poor Letty. She was a sweet girl. Innocent. Guilt wracked through me at the reminder that I’d taken advantage of her, too. But not like this. I would not ignore such tragedy. I said Letty wasn’t my concern because I hadn’t gotten her pregnant, and I didn’t want to step in where my father should. Obviously, he ignored his responsibilities once again.
Veva’s accusation was unfounded and unfair, but arguing with her as Letty moaned and bled wasn’t the time. After all I’d said to Veva, all I admitted, I’d hoped for a little more trust. My heart split in two, knowing Veva was the half separated from me. Her lack of faith in me cut deep.
I stormed off to find my father, rather than wait for Veva’s unwarranted wrath. Finding him lounging in his office, the rain pelted his windows. He sat back in his desk chair, rocking forward and back, the end of a pen tracing over his lips.
“You’ve heard.” His statement stopped me.
“This could have killed the girl.” Rage unfurled in me. “I sent her to your priestess, and she didn’t take care of her.”
“It is not the place of Athena’s women to save them all.”
“It isn’t the place of Athena to take care of your responsibilities, either. It’s unacceptable.”
Zeke had the grace to look chagrined briefly. His eyes lowered and he sat forward. A thick hand came to his forehead and fingers pinched at his tan skin.
“Why can’t you leave the young ones alone?” I snapped. “Must you have every one of them after me?”
“Not every one of them.” His head rose and his eyes narrowed, but the gleam in them taunted me.
I stepped forward. “I’d kill you if you touched her.”
“Fulfilling the prophecy, I see.” He sat back with a thud, and his chair rocked. A thick digit came to his lower lip. My breath hitched at the threat. He knew I wanted to believe I’d already fulfilled it. He wanted to believe it as well, hoping the term father within the prophecy was stated loosely. “I worry you might enjoy that, son.”
The endearment did not endear me. It made my skin crawl. I’d never been his son, not really. Even after all these decades, after all the training, a division stood between us, a great divide of power and fear. Another set of opposites attracted. My father was another sort of destiny. He held power and wanted to instill fear. In me. It hadn’t worked. I had the potential for the same power he held. Perhaps even stronger, my trainer had warned me. A strength rested within me, not separate from me, like his talisman lightning bolt. My back sizzled and warmed along my spine. Anger fueled the energy. Zeke would know this about me. He was the first to tell me of my gift.
“You need to make this right for Letty.”
“I’m actually allowing it to be right for Veva.”
“Veva?” My eyes opened wide. “What does Veva have to do with this?”
“Two things. Veva needs to learn her gift: the power within her to heal and cure. She also needs to see you for who you are.”
My mouth fell open. “You talked Mel into this game, didn’t you? You wanted her to make it seem like it was me. How?” But I had my answer. My father fucked Mel as well, and Mel’s jealousy over Letty fueled her vengeance on both me and my father.
“How could you?” I sighed, frustrated with his attempts to tear me down, to strip away the one thing that had potential to be everything to me.
“Veva’s a smart girl. She needs to get back to school to continue her training. She needs to get out of the clouds with you and back on her path. Her destiny.”
“I’m her destiny.” I stepped forward again, resting my hands on his desk.
“You will only hurt her, as I’ve hurt her mother.”
I pushed off the desk and stood straighter. “No, you wanted to hurt me, so I wouldn’t have what you didn’t have with her mother. You took from me, because you never had what I could have had. You’ve destroyed me.” I spun away from him and then turned back.
“I think the prophecy stated it incorrectly. The son would not kill the father. The father would sacrifice his son, forcing love out of the equation.”
“What equation is that, smart boy,” Zeke mocked.
“Veva plus me equals destiny. I won’t let you play god here, Father,” I spat. I could twist fate just as easily.
She didn’t believe me, and my chest ached. Veva’s human heart couldn’t handle more drama. My feisty girl had lost her fight once again, and I wanted to battle every war for her instead. The rain deluged downward and Hades cursed me, but my emotions rained with fear and relief that Veva. While she hadn’t cascaded down the mountain, though, I didn’t believe she was safe with me. Even wrapped in my lap, she felt distant.
/> We returned to the main house, and I took Veva to my room versus the cottage. Wet and shaken, she needed to be submerged in warmth, and the tub in my room was the perfect spot. Lifeless, she sat at the edge of my large bed as I ran the bath, filling it with a fragrant oil. I returned to undress her, and like a ragdoll, Veva gave me control.
“Let me pamper you.” Shaky hands unbuttoned her shirt as if they’d never undressed a woman before. Veva sat silent, complacent to my attention.
“Stay with me, Vee,” I begged, meaning more than physically. I didn’t want to lose her. I couldn’t be without her. I didn’t feel whole, knowing she was missing. I couldn’t exist, if she left me permanently. Removing my own soaked shirt, I stood to slip out of my jeans. I helped Veva to stand and dragged her shorts down to her ankles, tapping them for her to step out. Her skin goose-bumped with cold.
“I’m going to take care of you, Vee.”
Her hand on my shoulder stopped me. “Thank you.” She mouthed the words, but no sound came from her whitened lips. Scooping her up in my arms, I carried her to the tub. I stepped in, still holding her, and sunk down, placing her between my legs. The space was large enough for two, and the jets steadily circulated the warm liquid around us. I scooped up handfuls of water and poured it over her head, warming her hair and washing out the rain. My fingers massaged her shoulders and up her neck.
“Vee, talk to me.” Her silence disturbed me. Grown too comfortable with her fighting nature, a silent Veva concerned me. I worried a storm roared fiercely under her skin and any moment she’d thunder and leave me.
“Okay, I’ll talk. I tried to sleep with Letty. It was before I knew you, but that sounds lame because the second I saw you, I knew you. The familiarity unsettled me, and I thought drowning in another girl would rid me of the prickling energy inside me. Stupid. I’m stupid.”
“You are,” she muttered, and I smiled to myself, leaning forward to kiss her shoulder. Those words brought me ridiculous joy. She could insult me all she wanted, as long as she spoke to me.
“I couldn’t finish what I started with her. I couldn’t get you out of my head. I didn’t really want you out of my head, but I didn’t know what to do. No one frustrated me as much as you.” I swiped a hand through my hair and held it behind my neck. “Jeez, Vee, you were under my skin instantly.” Her mouth twitched with those words, and I brushed my cheek against hers. My hands lowered into the bath and skimmed over her stomach.
