"I don't want you to do all that just because I mentioned it," I said. "It was just a thought."
"No, I actually like the idea. I think a get together at our place would be fun. I'm sorry you have to work."
"That's okay, it's probably best with the Ethan thing," I said.
"If I end up having people over, I'll text and let you know if he shows up. That way you know what you're walking in to when you get home."
I thanked Gretchen for being so thoughtful. I wasn't sure if I'd have enough willpower to be face to face with Ethan and not flirt with him or otherwise give him the wrong impression. Would it really be the wrong impression, though? I was reasonably sure I would cheat on Jeremy if I hung out with Ethan. Did that make me a bad person? For as long as I can remember, I've had a firm stance on the whole no cheating thing, but now I was leaning in the other direction. By the end of lunch, I'd convinced myself that I wouldn't go to Gretchen's after work that coming Saturday. The clear choice was for me to steer clear of Ethan. Unfortunately, the fact that I thought of him as being so forbidden only served to make me think about him more. I could imagine his amber eyes as if I'd seen them just moments before. God help me.
Chapter 18
Ethan
Josh and I were on the road to L.A. by one o'clock Saturday afternoon. I got my butt out of bed and went to the gym at 5AM so I could get my workout done and we could get an early start. Josh had been practically dragging me up there this weekend, but that was before I got the news that Gretchen and Joel were having us all over to their house.
Josh had good reason for wanting to make the trip. One of Joel's friends (an avid golfer) was about to start planning a massive construction project. People with projects of that magnitude have to talk to someone like Josh, who tells them how their structure will affect and be affected by the environment it's built in. Of course, these are very time consuming and expensive consultations, hence Josh's sudden interest in golf.
He begged me to go since I knew Joel and got along well with him. He said my presence would help him relax. I had already said yes anyway, but I was all over that trip like white on rice once I knew we'd be hanging at Emily's place. I knew she'd be working that night, but I also knew the Laker games were over at a reasonable hour. In fact, I'd be just getting started when she got off that evening. How would I be able to say such a thing after getting up at 5 to go to work, you ask. The answer is: Josh. He offered to drive while I slept. We took my car, since it got much better gas mileage than Josh's truck, but he drove. I was extremely thankful for that since I had been up for so long. Josh listened to music in his headphones, and I slept the whole way to Los Angeles.
We had plans to spend the night at Collin's place. He and Rachel had room for a couple of extras… one in the guest bedroom and one on the couch. I told Josh he had to surf the couch like old times. He said he didn't care where he slept as long as he had a pillow, but I was planning on making him take the bedroom since he let me nap during the trip. Gretchen and Joel offered several times to let us stay at their place, but we couldn't really do that since Collin and Rachel had room for us. As much as I wanted to stay the night on their property (if for no other reason than to be close to Emily) I thought it'd be weird. Thankfully, they decided to have us all over to their place the night before the golf thing. I might not have been spending the night, but going over there for a party was the next best thing.
Collin was sitting on the couch watching a reality TV show about a pawnshop when Josh and I opened the door.
"Come in!" Collin yelled from over his shoulder. "Forgive me, but I'm not getting up right now. I just sat down with a plate of food. Come on in and make yourselves at home."
Josh and I set down our bags. I went straight for the kitchen.
"You mind if I make some coffee?" I asked.
"No," Collin said. "It's the kind that makes one cup at a time, you know how to use it?"
"I could use one of those too," Josh said. Collin muted the television before walking, plate of food in hand, to the barstools in the kitchen where he sat down to finish.
"I thought we were eating at their house," Josh said as Collin sat down to eat in the kitchen with us.
Collin smiled. "We are," he said. "I can't seem to eat enough today. I had a hard swim and I need the fuel."
"Whatcha got there?" I asked, peering onto his plate from across the room. It smelled good. That smell was one of the first things I noticed when we came in the door.
"Lasagna, and there's a whole pan of it in the fridge if you want some." We took him up on the offer. Josh and I both sat down with a plate full of pasta and a cup of coffee.
"You guys remember Rachel's friend Brit who lives in Seattle?" Collin asked.
"She's here for the weekend, huh?" Josh said. Then he suddenly thought of something. "Oh, dude, I hope she isn't staying in a hotel or anything because you and Rachel didn't have room for her to stay here," he said, "because E and I could have stayed at Joel's."
"No, no," Collin said, "We know we can have you stay at Joel's if we needed you to, but Brit already had plans to stay with Gretchen. She's only in town for a day or so since she has to get back to school. They have a lot to talk about, with the restaurant and everything, and wanted to use every waking moment to iron some things out… or at least that's what Rachel said."
I wanted to be the one staying at Joel's. Not because I didn't like Collin and Rachel, because I do. I wanted so badly to see Emily. I was outright jonesing for her. I considered skipping the thing at Gretchen's house for the Lakers game, but that would be pushing it. Especially since I had no idea if Pigskin was in town or not.
"Do you ever see Emily?" I asked Collin, because I couldn't wait any longer.
"Oh, here we go," Josh said, a sigh in his voice. "I thought we were over this."
Collin looked at me. I could see a brief look of sympathy flash across his face. "He's never around," he said to me. "We see Emily quite a bit and he's never with her. I only met him once." He was trying to make me feel better, but, to tell you the truth, that was one time too many for me. I couldn't stand the thought of her with Jeremy. But what could I do? Nothing. It had to be her choice.
We talked about swimming and swimming alone for the rest of the pre-meal, meal. It was a subject Collin and I talked about a lot. We shot ideas off of each other, and mostly commiserated over being stuck in the water for so much of our lives. Actually, we both really loved what we were doing, and we'd become best of friends in the process. He and I had no competition with each other, since we didn't swim the same races. And even if we did (like we have in the past) we'd each be happy for the other's successes.
****
The little shindig at Joel's was really casual, so we were told just to show up whenever we wanted to. Rachel had told them we'd be there close to six, and she didn't want to be late since Brit rarely got to come to L.A. I tried to do it when nobody was looking, but I snuck my bag into the truck on the off chance I'd be spending the night with Emily. Rachel ran around the house getting ready, and by five o'clock we were in the car. There were nine of us total. Collin and Rachel, Joel and Gretchen, Josh and me, made six. Then there was Gretchen's friend, who looks just like Gretchen now (weird) and her boyfriend. That made eight. Brit from Seattle was the ninth. And, oh how I wish I could tell you Emily made ten, but she wasn't there. I knew she wouldn't be, but I couldn't help think about her constantly since the guesthouse was right there in the back yard. I wondered what Sal was doing back there, and several times, was tempted to go to her place and see if she left the door open so I could say hi to him.
We'd been drinking for a few hours, and the games had gotten more and more hilarious as the night went on. At 10:30, however, I could no longer stop myself from going to her apartment to see if she'd come home. I assumed she'd come straight to the main house after work, but as the night went on, I started to think she might not.
I crossed through the pool area to Emily's front door. The light
s were off, and things were quiet, but I knocked anyway. Sal heard me and started barking. I could tell he was locked in his kennel because his bark never got any closer.
Instead of going straight back inside, I walked around the pool area toward the side of the house. I knew the path Emily would be taking to get from her car to the house, so I found a spot to sit on a little garden bench that was tucked away. From this vantage point, I could see her if she approached, but she could easily miss me. I waited there for twenty minutes before I saw her car's headlights and heard the engine turn off. I couldn't help but notice that her car's engine sounded really funny. I wondered if that was Emily at all, since the car I was hearing sounded more like a sick Harley. I sent her a text from my hidden park bench.
Me: "Hey, What you up to?"
I couldn't see what was going on inside the car, but the driver sat there for a long minute without opening the door to get out. My phone went off.
Emily: "I'm just getting off work."
I didn't know if she was trying to lie or if just getting home counted as just getting off work.
Me: "Let me know when you get home."
Emily: "I'm home, but I have plans. Why? What's going on?"
Me: "What plans?"
I heard the car door open and Emily get out. I could have sworn she was huffing in exasperation and I wondered if me asking about her plans was such a bad thing. Josh and I had hitched a ride with Collin and Rachel, so I knew she hadn't seen my car in the driveway. Maybe she didn't even know I was there.
With great effort, she pulled a giant bunch of balloons from the backseat of the car. There were at least a dozen of them. A few were the big foil ones in cool shapes. It was a really big bouquet. I felt the sharp sting of jealousy, knowing that balloons weren't really an item you buy for yourself. She started walking up the pathway, and my heart quickened at the realization that I didn't have a plan. She was just getting ready to walk right past me, and I had no clue what to do or say.
I had about eight seconds to figure something out since sitting there in silence and letting her walk past me wasn't really an option. I hesitated a second too long, though, and before I knew it, she had walked right past me. I had to do something.
I caught up to her in about four strides. She heard my approach, and before I could take hold of her shoulder to get her attention, she was looking back, startled and frightened. She instinctively let go of the balloons, and pushed at me, thinking I was someone she should be afraid of. She realized her mistake, and feeling bad about pushing me, reached out to grab my shirt. As she took hold of me, I made the same gesture, reaching out to pluck the ever-rising bunch of balloons from the air before they could get away.
"Oh my God Ethan! You scared me to death!" She took a deep breath, still looking at me with wide eyes. "You just text me. Did you know I was home? I just pulled up. What are you doing out here? I thought you would be hanging out in the house with everybody."
Chapter 19
Emily
"You sacred the crap out of me," I said. I must have looked really freaked out because Ethan tried to stifle a laugh as he reached out to bring me into a comforting hug. He could only use one hand, however, because he had my balloon strings gripped in the other. I went to him willingly, partly because he smelled, felt, and looked so dang good, and partly because I just couldn't resist him.
My inability to resist him was exactly the reason I couldn't be around him. Jeremy would shit a brick if he knew I was wrapped up in Ethan's arms right now. He'd want to kill someone if he knew how much I liked it.
I wanted Ethan. He made me feel things I wasn't accustomed to. I thought constantly about the things we did on Valentine's Day, and I found myself dying for a repeat performance. I even tried to do it myself a couple of times (God help me for admitting that) but could never get it to feel like it did that night with Ethan. He knew the right buttons, and I wanted them pushed.
"I waited for you," he said, drawing me from my thoughts. "I knew you'd be done with work at about this time, so I thought I'd try to catch you. Who got you the balloons?" He offered me the strings in case I wanted them back. I broke contact after only a few seconds of that hug and continued walking toward my door.
"Would you mind holding them for a second while I find the key? You can tie them to a chair in my apartment, if you don't mind. They're from the girls. They got me a couple bath bombs from Lush, too. I love those things." We were walking so closely, I could almost feel the heat from his body.
"I hate to blow past the fact that you're inviting me into your place, which I'm totally stoked about, but what's the occasion?" He asked.
"What occasion? Oh, you mean these?" I pointed at the balloons, and he nodded. "My birthday. Well not today, but tomorrow. I'll be twenty." I smiled, but he just looked confused and maybe even a little perturbed.
"Why didn't you tell me it's your birthday?" he asked. We crossed the threshold to my little house, and I turned on the lights as he closed the door behind him. Sal was whimpering in excitement, and his tail was hitting the kennel so hard, I thought he might actually hurt himself.
"I'm coming Sal!" I said. I looked at Ethan with a smile. "I don’t know why I didn't think to mention it. Probably because I don't want people to feel like they have to do something to acknowledge me, you know, like this." Again, I gestured to the balloons Ethan was holding. "We all know each other's birthdays at work, but they're the only people who know anything about it. Gretchen and them would feel bad if they knew, so don't mention it if you don't mind."
"Aw, come on. Don't be ridiculous. It's not too late for them to be able to wish you a happy birthday, it hasn't even happened yet! We should at least go in there and let everyone make a toast to you. You can't just have a birthday and not tell your friends."
He was so sweet, and his easy smile and whiskey colored eyes were simply gorgeous. I seriously couldn't think of a single thing I would change about his face. Jeremy was all American boy handsome, but Ethan's face had an edge to it that went beyond America to really hot, exotic places.
I begged myself silently to be strong and not let the sight of him in all his glory influence me to make bad choices. Please keep it together, Emily. You're with someone, remember? Jeremy. Jeremy. Jeremy."
As if he was reading my mind, Ethan said, "I'm almost afraid to ask, but can I assume you're spending your birthday alone?" He hesitated, like he wanted to say something, but didn't.
"I'll be alone." Then I caught myself. "Not alone, alone. Not sad and lonely alone. I'm still new here, and I just haven't gotten around to telling everyone my stuff yet," I said. "I'll probably cross paths with Gretchen and Brit since they mentioned having lunch tomorrow, but neither of them know it's my birthday. I don’t mind, really." I smiled in an attempt to assure Ethan I wasn't sad at the thought of skipping over my birthday.
Sal was going freaking berserk in his kennel. It was impossible to ignore him any longer.
"I brought him one of those bones he likes. Remind me to get it from my car and give it to you before we leave tonight," Ethan said.
For the tiniest of seconds, I gave him a confused look as if to ask why in the world he'd even think of leaving, and I was tempted to tell him he could give the bone to Sal himself when he came back to my place later that night. I wanted him to assume that anytime he was in Los Angeles he would be staying the night with me. My feelings for Ethan were getting harder and harder to control, and I knew I had to stop playing both sides… even if it was only in my head. I'd still been faithful to Jeremy, and it had to stay like that. I couldn't destroy the thing I'd wanted for years for a guy who's semi-tamable and questionably loyal.
"You shouldn't have done that," I said. I didn't want him spoiling Sal. I knew it sounded harsh, but I was shaken by my needs when I was around him, and that ticked me right off. "Seriously. Sal's already attached to you and it won't be good for him to get much closer to you if you aren't…" I paused. "What I'm saying is that, you can't just go around
being this nice, or hearts will be broken." I looked at Ethan, begging him to understand. My eyes were glassy, full of unshed tears.
"I'm not trying to break anyone's heart," He promised. "I just really like Sal, and I wanted to bring him a prize, that's all." He paused for a second before asking, "Am I going to be in trouble if I tell you I brought you a prize too?" He flinched, afraid of hearing my answer."
"Jesus, Ethan. Why the crap would you go and do something like that?" I asked. I was seriously mad at him for being impossible to hate. Not that I needed to hate him, but I sure as crud didn't need to love him. "Please tell me your joking," I said. "I hope you were just planning on pulling out a wad of cash and handing me a twenty because you feel bad about it being my birthday. Please tell me that's what you're talking about, because then I won't feel so bad when I have to refuse it."
Ethan didn't say a word. He just smiled coolly at my rant as he tucked a hand in his front pocket and pulled out a little silver figure. He handed it to me. I tested the weight of it in my hand. It was really heavy for it's size. I could see what it was before I even righted it on the palm of my hand. It was a tiny sculpture of a swimmer on a starting block. It couldn't have been more than two inches tall, but the detail was amazing. I inspected it for a full minute, holding it up to the light for a better view.
"Is this you?" I asked, clutching it to my chest. I knew the answer before he even confirmed it.
"My mom had it made," he said. "She hired this guy who does these in all sizes from miniature to giant statue. He's got a really interesting process. First, He sent a photographer to the pool to get images of me from all angles. Then, so he could put the finishing touches on the design, I had to model in person. I had to hold the pose for two and a half hours."
"Are you serious? That's crazy," I said. "What took him so long?"
Second String (In Too Deep #3) Page 13
