The major told Clay to sit down, then shouted for a private at a desk outside to get Clay some lemonade. “You look really tired,” he told Clay.
Clay rubbed at his eyes. “I am. This whole thing turned out to be more of an adventure than I expected. For one thing, the arrival of the camels at Indianola almost brought us disaster. Horses, mules, dogs, pigs—” He shook his head. “Even people. All got into the ruckus, horses rearing and whinnying, mules braying and bolting, dogs barking at the heels of the camels, pigs squealing, chickens squawking, people pointing and laughing.” He snickered. “It was a sight, I’ll tell you, a lot worse than what you saw outside just now. One man’s horse stumbled backward and broke a leg, had to be shot. I repaid him out of my own pocket.”
“I’ll see that you are reimbursed.” The major shook his head, then sighed. “Well, we certainly know that our first problem is: the reaction of other animals.”
“Yes, sir. The good thing about it is that the camels themselves don’t seem to be easily upset. They stayed calm through the whole episode. They sure are strange creatures, kind of regal and aloof. Nothing seems to bother them much, except maybe being overloaded.” He rubbed at the back of his neck. “We put on a little demonstration of the weight they could carry. One man insisted on adding to the weight and yelled and kicked at the camel to get up. She reared back and spit a wad of cud right onto his chest. Damndest thing I’ve ever seen. She tried to bite him, too. The crowd got a good laugh out of that one.”
Major Keller laughed. “I wish I had seen it. Sounds like you really had your hands full.”
“Yes, sir, in more ways than one.” He thought about Nina again, wished he could stop thinking about her. God, he missed her. It was totally ridiculous to feel this way.
“So, how much did the camel carry?”
Clay stared at the man’s desk, his eyes looking distant.
The major frowned. “Lieutenant?”
Clay raised his eyes, looking startled. “I’m sorry, sir. I was…thinking of something else.”
“I asked how much the camel could carry.”
“Oh, we loaded four huge bales of hay onto her, sir, a good twelve hundred pounds. She stood up and sauntered away as though it was nothing.”
The major’s eyebrows arched in surprise. “Twelve hundred pounds!” He rose from his chair, loosening the top of his shirt against the hot day. “I’ll be damned.”
The private came inside then with a tray that held two glasses of lemonade. He set them on the major’s desk, and Clay took his glass, eagerly swallowing the cool liquid.
“So, tell me about the other problems you had. What about one of the camels being wounded? Did some frightened citizen do it?”
Clay smiled wryly. “No, sir. A horse thief. Jess Humes, to be exact.”
“Jess Humes! The man we’ve been after for so long?”
“The same. He’s dead.”
“Dead!” Keller sat back down. “You’d better start this at the beginning, Lieutenant.”
Again Clay felt the tiny stab at his heart. “There was a pretty little Mexican girl at Indianola…tried to sell me some horses,” he began. The major listened quietly, watching Clay’s eyes as he explained the course of events. There was something there, something being left out, but Keller couldn’t quite name it.
“Well,” he said when Clay finished his explanation, “this calls for congratulations. There are a lot of people in south and east Texas who will be more than grateful that you put an end to that gang of horse thieves. I don’t doubt that the remaining two men have been hanged by now, and good riddance.” He finished his lemonade. “I’m not so sure it was a good idea, though, for you to let that young Mexican boy and girl go free. How do you know for certain they’ll go back to Mexico and not cause any more trouble?”
“I don’t. I’m just trusting my judgment. The girl, at least, seemed very willing to end the horse stealing and go home. I can’t blame her, after what she went through. I’m not so sure about her brother, but I think he generally does what Nina…I mean Miss Juarez wants.”
The major noticed a slight flush in Clay’s cheeks. “Nina?”
Clay smiled almost bashfully. “When you tend to someone in that much trouble, things quickly move to a first-name basis.”
The major sighed. “My feelings are mixed on this, Lieutenant. I agree it probably would have weighed on your conscience if you had turned such young people over to the Rangers, considering they’re Mexican and one of them was a woman.”
“Barely a woman. I just couldn’t do it, sir. If you want to reprimand me for it, fine, but it won’t make me regret my decision. They’re hardly more than kids, and they got a pretty bad break in the war.”
“Yes, but they can’t let what happened affect the rest of their lives. They’re outlaws, Lieutenant, stealing from Texans only because they think they have the right. Pure vengeance. It isn’t right. I just hope this is the last we hear about them.”
“Yes, sir, so do I.” Clay studied his glass, feeling an ache at the words. The last we hear about them. He would not see Nina Juarez again, but he could not forget that face, that body. Most of all, he could not forget the taste of her mouth or the way it fit so well against his own, the delicious innocence of that kiss. He could still feel her full, virgin breasts crushed against his chest.
“She got to you, didn’t she, Lieutenant?”
Clay looked over at the major. He sighed, putting his glass on the man’s desk. “Yes, sir, I suppose she did.”
“And that’s the main reason why you couldn’t turn them in.”
“I suppose.”
The major chuckled, shaking his head. “When I sent you to Indianola and joked about you finding some pretty señorita, I didn’t mean it so literally, Lieutenant.”
Clay grinned, feeling a little foolish. “I know, sir. If this turns into a problem, I’ll take full responsibility.”
The major rose. “At least we’ve put an end to the Humes gang. We don’t need to mention the young Mexican brother and sister to anyone. We’ll just hope they’re well on their way to Mexico and will never show up in this part of Texas again.”
“Yes, sir.” Clay rose. “May I have permission to leave, sir? I really need a bath and to tend to the wound on my arm. It still isn’t completely healed. I would also like to start preparing my written report.”
“Fine.” The major met his eyes. “When you write it up, leave out the part about the Juarezes. Just mention that some citizen told you the Humes gang might be near and you managed to find them, and so forth. The Mexican girl and her brother are out of the picture and probably out of the country by now.”
“Yes, sir.”
“And if you’re smart, you’ll put the girl out of your mind. Thinking serious thoughts about pretty señoritas can be dangerous to American soldiers, Lieutenant.”
Clay smiled sadly. “Yes, sir.”
“I’ll see that you get proper credit for putting the Humes gang out of business.”
“Thank you, sir.”
The two men saluted each other, and Clay walked outside. Put the girl out of your mind, the major had told him. “Easier said than done,” Clay muttered, heading for the bath house. Not even the Mexican whore at San Antonio had been able to help him stop thinking about Nina Juarez. She had only made him want Nina more. But it was a hopeless thought now. The major was right. He had to forget her.
Chapter Nine
Nina entered Charlene Dickson’s room, peeking first to make sure she was alone. The woman slept soundly, enough of her bare back showing that it was obvious she was naked. The room reeked of perfume, and another smell, a smell Nina had gotten used to, although the reason for it still made her mind swim with questions and curiosity. It was the scent of man, or, sometimes in Charlene’s case, several men.
Nina was relieved the woman’s most recent customer was gone now. She very quietly walked around the room picking up dirty clothes and putting them into her basket. This basket
was tagged with a pink ribbon, indicating these were Charlene’s clothes so that she would not get them mixed up with Carmell’s or Juanita’s things. The other two women didn’t mind, but Charlene always got upset when a piece of their clothing ended up in her basket, or the other way around.
Nina was not at all happy with this job as laundress for the whores who worked at the Pecos Tavern in El Paso. Still, it was a job, and the pay was better than any money she had made at any other honest work. Emilio did general chores at the tavern, helped store supplies, tended to the customers’ horses, cleaned the stalls in the shed out back. He also cleaned up in the wee hours of the morning after the tavern closed.
Nina was aware her brother was growing restless and was not happy with what he considered menial work. She suspected it would only be a matter of time before he got the itch to light out on their own again. He had chosen work at the Pecos because El Paso was a gathering place for men fresh off various trails, most important, the Outlaw Trail.
Emilio’s ears were always open. Here in the tavern men talked openly about their lawless exploits, and it worried Nina that Emilio seemed to envy them. She stayed out of the main tavern during the busy hours, sometimes peeking out at the customers from the back room where she lived, seeing men who reminded her of Jess Humes. She was always afraid to let herself be seen in the evenings, worried some drunken outlaw would think she was like the women upstairs.
Charlene stirred, and Nina hurried out of the room, closing the door quietly. She was repulsed and yet fascinated by the life these women led. How could any woman bed a different man, or men, every night? That part of their life was what repulsed her. What fascinated her was that they seemed to enjoy it. For years she had been haunted by the nightmare of her mother’s rape, yet now she was plagued with a new memory—the morning she had entered Charlene’s room only to discover one of her customers was still there and was enjoying a last round with the woman.
The memory remained vivid. The two of them had been so engrossed in each other that they had not even noticed young Nina staring in shock and wonder. To this day Nina could not understand why she had not fled immediately. She had seen the ugly act before, but she had never seen the woman enjoying it. Charlene gave herself so willingly and appeared to be in utter ecstasy. Could it really be that enjoyable? What upset her the most was that when she tried to imagine it could be that way, she always ended up thinking about the gringo lieutenant. It had been nearly a year since she saw him last, yet he still wore on her mind and heart.
She sighed, setting the basket down in the hall and picking up another, this one tied with a blue ribbon. She headed for Carmell Santon’s room. She had so many questions, so many new feelings and desires. She peeked in Carmell’s room. Carmell and the third prostitute, Juanita Perez, were both Mexican. Carmell was in her early twenties, Juanita a little older and plumper. Nina’s eyes widened when she realized there was still a man in Carmell’s bed. Carmell was standing near her dressing table wearing a robe. She glanced at Nina.
“Come in, little one,” she told Nina. “It is only your brother.”
More questions and confusion moved through Nina as she hesitated. Why did it always upset her when her brother went with whores? She could not figure out how he could do that to any woman after what had happened to their mother. Was there something about men that made them unable to keep away from such things? She realized her brother would never be cruel to an innocent woman who did not want him, yet to know he bedded these women made him a little bit like those Texans to her, taking a woman for the sheer pleasure of it.
“I will come back,” she said shyly.
“It’s all right, Nina,” Emilio said from the bed. He sat up, rubbing at his eyes and running a hand through his dark hair. “Just turn around until I get my pants on. I have chores to do anyway.”
Nina turned away, embarrassed, confused. She heard a shuffling sound, and then Emilio was beside her, holding his shirt and boots in his hands. “Go ahead and collect the clothes.” He glanced at Carmell. “I had a good time, Carmell, like I always do.”
Carmell laughed. “Come back any time, mi guapo hombre. You are muy bien.”
“You are the one who is good,” Emilio answered with a wink. He walked out, and Nina turned to pick up the clothes that were scattered about the room.
“Take my bedclothes, also, will you, Nina?”
Nina reddened, feeling an odd anger with her brother, a kind of jealousy, not in the fact that he liked other women, but because he was able to enjoy them physically when she remained so confused and ignorant of that intimate act. She needed to talk to someone about her many questions and fears, but there was no one. Certainly not Emilio, and women like Charlene and Carmell would only laugh at her.
“Your brother is very handsome,” Carmell told her. She sat down in front of a mirror to brush her hair. “And he is so good with a woman.”
Nina said nothing as she jerked the bedclothes from the woman’s feather mattress. Carmell glanced at her in the mirror, smiling wryly. She put down her brush and turned to watch the younger woman for a moment. “I am curious, Nina,” she said. “Don’t you ever think about men?”
Nina hesitated. She remained turned away from Carmell as she returned to rolling the bedclothes into a bundle. “No,” she lied.
Carmell stood up, tying her ruffled robe. “Oh, come now, Nina. How old are you, eighteen? Nineteen?”
“I will be nineteen in another month.”
Carmell folded her arms and sauntered closer. “Your brother says you are a virgin.”
Nina straightened, reddening more but facing the woman squarely. “It is not my brother’s business to be telling you such things. It is no one’s business!”
Carmell smiled then, but with a kindness in her eyes. “Of course it isn’t. He only told me because I had mentioned what a rich woman you could be if you did what we do, considering you are the most beautiful señorita most people have ever set eyes on.”
Nina dropped her eyes, offended, yet realizing Carmell was giving her a compliment.
“At any rate, he got very angry with me for even suggesting such a thing. He told me then about your mother and what happened…and about what a proper young lady you are.”
Nina turned to shove the bedclothes into the basket, saying nothing. Carmell watched her pick up the rest of the clothes. She sensed her embarrassment and confusion. “Nina,” she spoke up, “please stop your work and look at me.”
Nina turned, the basket in her hands. She met Carmell’s eyes, and the woman saw that Nina’s were misty with tears. “You shouldn’t be afraid, Nina. I know you think what the women and I do is wrong. You could never lie with a man for money or pure pleasure. A young lady like you would have to be in love. I know that. But I think perhaps you are thinking that even if you love the man, you still could never lie with him.”
Nina dropped her eyes. This woman seemed to understand more than she thought possible. And she was not laughing at her. “I…I do not know what to think.”
“It makes you angry that your brother can enjoy these things, but you cannot.”
“My brother can do what he likes.”
Carmell stepped closer. She touched Nina’s arm. “Nina, someday the right man will come along, some handsome hombre like your brother, and he will sweep your heart away. I promise you, Nina, that being with a man can be a most glorious experience. It is not always the way it happened to your mother. Surely you know that from how happy your mother and father must have once been.” She leaned closer. “Men can take your breath away, Nina. The right man, he can make you feel more alive and happy than you ever thought possible.”
Nina swallowed, meeting Carmell’s eyes again. “Many times you…you take the gringos for customers. Do you not hate them?”
Carmell smiled, shaking her head. “Nina, not all gringos are bad men. In the war, it was not just gringos killing Mexicans. Mexicans also killed the Americans. Do you not know about the Alamo?”
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“I have heard of it.”
“It happened before you were born, but many Americans were massacred, not just at the Alamo but at other times. No prisoners were taken; they were all murdered. Have you never considered that the Americans felt a vengeance of their own? It was their cry of ‘Remember the Alamo’ that gave them courage and the ability to defeat us in the war. A person can let hatred and vengeance burn in his heart forever, or he can learn to put the past behind him and go on from there.”
The war is finished, Nina. You and your brother have to understand and accept that. The words came to Nina so clearly. The lieutenant had told her that, the night they had talked as they sat by the campfire. She absently touched her lips with her tongue, still remembering his gentle kiss and the feelings it had stirred in her. Was that what Carmell meant about how good a man could make a woman feel?
“Sí, I suppose I can understand that the Americans would feel the same hatred that we feel,” she told Carmell.
Carmell smiled kindly. “We cannot change history, Nina. The Americans are a rich and powerful nation, and what is done is done. It does not mean we have to hang our heads, or feel the bitterness of defeat forever. We remain proud in spite of losing the war. I lost a father and a brother at Mexico City. My mother was killed and I was…” She turned away. “We lived in a little town near the border. Men came. It was like with your mother. I was fifteen.”
Nina’s eyes widened. “I…I am so sorry, Carmell. But surely your heart was full of hatred.”
The woman nodded. “It was, for a while. What happened to me left me feeling shamed and worthless. It led me to the life I lead now.” She shrugged. “But I learned life must go on and that to live with bitterness and hatred in your heart only makes you sick and ugly. It is so much easier to love and be happy than to hate, Nina.” Carmell faced her, smiling in spite of her watery eyes. “So, one day I went to church and I prayed to the Holy Mother to help me forget and forgive, and to appreciate the goodness in people.” A sly grin crept across her face. “But by then I had learned to like men—the ones who were kind to me. I make good money, too. So, until I am fat and old and men do not want to pay so much for me any longer, I continue to do what I do. But you could never do this. You have been left untouched, and that is good. You are being saved for one man, the right man.”
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