I had my answer. I’d definitely pissed him off. I rose immediately. “I’m so sorry,” I said, backing away and holding in tears. “I know that this—all of this—is awful. I’ll give you guys a minute.”
David called after me, but I ignored him as I walked out to the grass to regain my composure. He followed right behind me, and when I stopped, he hugged me to him. “What’d I tell you?” he asked. “Don’t do this alone. Don’t run away from me. Let me be your shield.”
“They think I’m not good enough for you,” I said. “I don’t blame them. I had an affair.”
“We had an affair,” he said. “I was there, too.”
“No. I did this. I have to face the consequences. You can’t protect me from it.” I sniffled back tears and rested my head on his chest. My chin trembled. “I just wish it was anyone but your parents.”
“Baby, hang on,” he said, his brow furrowing. “They’re not upset with you. My dad’s pissed that—”
“David,” a voice rumbled behind me. Gerard stepped up next to us. “Go back to the table. Let me talk to Olivia.”
I nodded when David hesitated. “It’s okay.”
After an encouraging look, David walked away.
Gerard’s tall frame loomed over me, and he rested a hand on my shoulder. One on one, I noticed how attractive he was up close. He was sturdy, like David, and his hand weighed heavy on me. “I’m sorry if I startled you,” he said. “David’s right. I’m not angry with you.”
I sniffed and wiped my face with the back of my hand. “Please don’t be upset with David. This isn’t his fault. He’s been nothing but amazing to me.”
Gerard surprised me by laughing. “I think I have you to thank for his good mood lately. My dear,” he continued softly, “I’m upset that anyone put his hands on you in anger. I don’t care about the ‘details’ of your relationship with my son, because I’ve never seen him this happy with anyone. And if your husband hurt you like this,” he said, motioning to my arm, “even once, then I’m even happier that David saved you than that you saved him.”
I gawked up at him. “Saved him?”
He peered over at his family and then back at me. “David’s waited a long time for you to come along. I can’t say I’ve ever been happy with David’s choices when it comes to women, so we’re thrilled that you’re finally here.”
“But you barely know me,” I blurted.
“We know our son. And to see him with you, we know enough.”
My throat thickened. I’d been so worried about how upset they’d get, I hadn’t considered they might actually be okay with this. “You . . . I—I don’t know what to say, Mr. Dylan.”
“This has been hard, hasn’t it?” he asked.
I nodded. “I’ve hurt people, including David, very much.”
“Do you love him?”
I looked at David’s back as his elbows rested on the table, his forehead in his hands. His fingers swept through his hair. “Yes,” I answered. “But if we could keep that between us for now? I haven’t . . . it’s hard for me to express.”
“He knows, I can tell. Life is nothing without love,” Gerard said. “My wife taught me that. I could not breathe if not for Judy. If your gut tells you you’re doing the right thing, then you are. And you have our support.”
“Thank you,” I whispered with tears still lingering in my eyes. “You and David are so much alike.”
“Lucky for him,” he said with a playful smile, and I nodded. “Come on back to the table,” he coaxed with an arm around my shoulder. “Tell us everything. And call me Gerard. That ‘Mr. Dylan’ shit is making me feel ancient.”
I followed him back, avoiding everyone’s gaze as I sat. David took my chin in his hand, raised my face, and gave me a determined kiss. His mother gasped, and I tried to pull away, but he held me steady. “Are you okay?” he asked, glancing at my arm.
I looked into his eyes and nodded ardently. He released me, and we turned to face the table.
“My baby,” Judy said to David, her eyes glossy. “In love.”
“Yes, Mom,” he said grumpily, and I finally smiled.
When I heard a sniffle next to me, I turned to see that Jessa was crying.
“Oh, come on,” David moaned. “Are you guys for real?”
“I’m sorry,” she said, blowing her nose into a napkin. “I was worried you’d never meet the girl.”
“And she’s a Leprechaun to boot,” Gerard put in, puffing up in his Notre Dame jacket. “Good game last night, huh?”
As Jessa had instructed, I smiled and nodded—then laughed because my mood had gone from stressed and upset to absolutely giddy.
“Mom,” Alex said with a groan. “Why’re you crying?”
“Don’t worry, sweetie.” She hugged him sideways on the bench, pulling him close. “They’re happy tears.”
“Women,” he said, rolling his eyes and returning to his video game.
We laughed, and Judy asked us for more details. Given that David and I had only had a weekend together, there wasn’t much to tell when we removed sex from the equation. His family was excited nonetheless.
10
As David and I walked hand in hand from the train to his apartment, our warm November day at the park turned into a typical November evening. I burrowed my nose into a scarf David had bought earlier and wrapped carefully around my neck.
“You’re quiet,” he said, squeezing my hand in his.
Since leaving Bill days earlier—a stressful event in itself—so much had happened. Shopping for and attending a large event. Witnessing a fistfight between my husband and my boyfriend. Facing fears as I’d confronted David’s past during the hottest sex of my life. Meeting my new boyfriend’s family. I tugged down the scarf. “It’s been a long weekend. I’m tired. And sore.”
“Sore, huh?” he asked, bumping me with his shoulder.
“Sore,” I said with the most serious face I could muster. “Like, I might have to start yoga to keep up with you.”
“Yes,” he said immediately. “The more ways I can bend you, the better.”
I grinned. “You’re such a hornball.”
“You have no idea what you’ve gotten yourself into.”
He stopped and drove my back up against a brick wall. “Think I’m kidding?” he asked, clasping our linked hands together behind his back. “I had the best time today,” he said quietly, kissing his way along my jaw until he found my lips.
I’d had a great day, too—getting to know his family, helping out the shelter, spending time with someone who, frankly, I never wanted to be away from. But as our blissful weekend came to an end, thoughts I’d been suppressing began to demand my attention.
It was clear how much David enjoyed being with family, specifically Alex. Did David envision a family of his own? Like Bill, did he just expect I’d get on board? Was it too soon to ask? Was it too late?
And tomorrow, we’d be back to reality. My things were at David’s place, and he’d asked me to move in. If I was honest with myself, I wanted that, too. I wanted to spend as much time as possible with David. But we were moving at lightning speed, and that scared me. I hadn’t thought of Bill much all day, at least not to wonder how he was doing, and that made me feel like an asshole.
“Earth to Olivia,” David said.
“Sorry,” I murmured against his lips.
“Where’d you go just now?”
“Nowhere,” I said. “I’m here.”
“Are you sure?”
I’d promised to try not to hide anything from him, and I didn’t want to. But as the sun disappeared behind the buildings around us, and David’s body warmed mine, there was no sense in ruining a perfect moment. I smiled and touched his cheek. “I had the best time, too. I’m good.”
He pulled me from the wall, and we continued to the apartment. When we’d arrived at the hotel, he cursed to himself as we boarded the elevator.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“I just realiz
ed something that does not make me happy,” he said as he swiped his card to the penthouse.
My heart dropped. I wrung my fingers together, bracing myself for the bad news I’d been expecting—as if I’d just been waiting for the bomb to drop that would blow up our perfect weekend, and it was Sunday night now, so . . .
“What is it?” I asked.
He jutted his chin at me. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
“I have no idea what you’re going to say,” I said. “It could be anything.”
He laughed and kissed me between the brows. “Honeybee,” he said softly, “I’m not going anywhere. Quit bracing yourself for bad news.”
My shoulders eased as the elevator slowed. We exited, and he unlocked the door to the apartment. I hung up my scarf and jacket with his in the foyer, then tailed him to the bedroom. “Well?” I asked.
“Oh. I’m mad that I’ve never taken you out on a proper date,” he said. “You know—picked you up, driven you to dinner, dropped you off. Kissed you on the doorstep.”
I laughed on an exhale, relieved to hear quite the opposite of bad news.
He stripped off his shirt and tossed it into the closet hamper. “Due to the nature of our relationship,” he continued, “I’ve skipped over the entire courting process. So we’ll have to make up for that.” He turned to me. “Olivia Germaine, would you let me take you out tomorrow night? Anywhere you like.”
“Surprise me,” I said, scrunching my nose at him before peeking at his six-pack. “Also, is walking around shirtless something you do often? It makes it hard to concentrate.”
“I’m thinking ‘no shirts allowed’ would make for a good rule.”
I went to him and wrapped my arms around his warm skin, careful not to touch his injured ribs.
He ghosted a hand over my bruised biceps. “I hate that he got to you before I did.” Without making contact, his palm moved to hover over my shoulder blade, to the bite mark. “Did I hurt you last night?”
“No.” He’d handled me perfectly the whole night. I tilted my head back to look up at him. “Your dad was pretty upset, though.”
“Where do you think I got my temper?” he asked. “He sits on a few boards, one of which focuses on domestic violence.”
“He’s scary,” I said. “Like you.”
David laughed just as my cell phone rang. I rolled my eyes and tried to pull away.
“Ignore it,” he said, kissing my forehead.
I wanted to, but I couldn’t with all the things going on in my life. I detangled myself from his arms.
“Who even has your new number?” he asked.
“Just Gretchen, my dad, and Bill.”
“Bill?” David asked as I rummaged through my bag.
“I e-mailed it to him.”
“Why?” he asked irritably.
“Like it or not, we’re going to have to be in touch.” I put the phone to my ear. “Hello?”
“Olivia?” My mother’s panicked voice came through the line, and I paled instantly.
“Mom?” I felt behind me to sit at the edge of the bed. “What’s wrong?”
“What’s going on?” she cried.
My heart sank when I realized from her hysterical voice that she’d probably been drinking. “I don’t know. You called me,” I said. “Calm down and tell me what’s wrong.”
“Don’t tell me to calm down, young lady,” she said. “I just spoke to Bill, and I just—I just don’t believe what he told me. Tell me he’s mistaken.”
Shit. I couldn’t believe Bill had gone behind my back and told my mother anything before I could gather my thoughts. How much did she know? After all the accusations she’d levied against my father over the years, I knew what was coming. I curled my toes against the bedroom’s wood floors. “Mom, things are very complicated—”
She gasped. “So it’s true? You cheated on him?”
David crouched at my feet, and my eyes slid to his. I held on to the encouragement in them as I prepared to break my mom’s already damaged heart. He placed a hand on my knee, and I covered it.
“Yes,” I said, holding David’s gaze. “It’s true.”
“How could you?” she screeched, and I jerked the phone away from my cheek. “I raised you to be a lady, not a slut.”
David flinched, and his hand twitched on my leg, no doubt tempted to take the phone from me.
“It’s not like that,” I said, clenching and unclenching my jaw. “I didn’t end things for a fling. My relationship with David is serious.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. You love Bill, and he doesn’t deserve this. What has he ever done to hurt you?”
I wasn’t playing this game with her. As long as Bill stayed in the role of the good husband, she’d never be able to understand my reasons for leaving. David wiped away my tear before I realized it was there. “I’m sorry, Mom,” I said. “I know this must be hard for you to hear.”
“It’s just nonsense. You stop this immediately, and go take care of your poor husband. That poor, poor man.”
“I can’t,” I said. “I can’t be the wife he needs, because I don’t love him the way I should. I made my choice.”
“A womanizer who can’t keep his hands off a married woman?” she asked.
Womanizer. That was Bill’s word. “David’s not like that,” I said.
“Oh, Bill told me everything. Bill deserves better than this. He deserves better than you.”
She’d always thought she’d deserved better, too—than my dad. Than her daughter. In her eyes, I’d been an enemy who’d taken my dad’s attention away, and then taken him away after their divorce. I choked back a sob. “How can you say that to me? You’re my mother.”
“Because I know what it feels like to be betrayed. How could you cheat after you saw what I went through?”
“Dad didn’t even cheat on you,” I cried in exasperation. “It’s in your head—it always has been.”
“This is all his fault. Your father did this, always pampering you. He spoiled you, and now you only know how to be selfish. After everything I went through, how could you turn around and destroy a husband who’s always been there for you? You’re selfish,” she slurred, “and you’re a fool to ruin the best thing that’s ever happened to you.”
“Mom, you haven’t even heard my—” With a few beeps, I pulled the phone away and stared down at the blank screen. “She hung up on me . . .”
Selfish, undeserving, foolish. She’d called me names before, but they’d never felt so true. I couldn’t deny that I’d sacrificed Bill’s happiness for my own.
I didn’t cry over my mother—it was just something I didn’t do anymore. So I was confused when I set the phone down, put my face in my hands, and burst into tears. The bed dipped with David’s weight, and he lifted me onto his lap, where he rocked me back and forth, whispering comforting words in my hair.
“My mom . . . doesn’t . . . love . . . me,” I sobbed.
“Oh, baby,” he said, clutching me to him.
I looked up at him suddenly and searched his eyes. “This will get better, won’t it?” I asked. “Easier?”
“Yes.” He paused, stroking my hair. “But until it does, you have me. Let me have some of the hurt.”
I nuzzled into his chest again, taking a deep whiff through a runny nose. Then, I imagined Bill calling and telling her everything—how I’d lied to him for months, had used Davena’s death as an excuse, had confessed everything over pancakes, had given back the ring and asked for a divorce on a cold, bleary, and otherwise unremarkable night. I cried harder.
“Hey,” David said softly, moving me back by my shoulders to look at me. “We’ll not only make it through this, but we’ll come out better for it. We have something strong. Stronger than all the bullshit.”
Do we? I wondered. Can love alone overcome everyone and everything—even ourselves?
“I hope so,” I murmured, wiping my wet tears from his bare chest. The words slut and womanizer rang through my e
ars, a perfect pair. But the man who held me softened the blows. Though I wanted nothing more than to stay there, he set me on the bed and disappeared into the bathroom.
Oh, what a mess I’ve made. Bill is heartbroken and blindsided. I’ve lost friends, and now maybe even family. And what will my dad say when I see him next weekend? Why have I done this? What have I done? Is it worth it?
I looked up at a noise. David leaned in the doorway, concern etching his features as he watched me in only his underwear.
He’s worth it. For him, I would give up everything.
My body tensed at the unbidden thought. I had this strange feeling that he meant more to me than anything ever had, even though we’d known each other for such a short time. If I hadn’t known before, I knew now—I was desperately in love. It was a kind of love I didn’t recognize, one that changed a person. A kind of love I’d fended off my whole life. As I stared at him, this man who filled the doorway . . .
Cold, stark fear struck me in the gut.
He walked over, pulled me to my feet, and kneeled in front of me. I gripped his shoulders as, one at a time, he lifted my feet to remove my booties and socks. Next, he pulled down my pants, taking my underwear with them. He rose and removed my sweater. I lifted my arms so he could pull my t-shirt over my head and unfasten my bra.
“Step,” he said, and I did, leaving the pile behind. With a hand on my lower back, he guided me into the bathroom where he’d drawn a luminous bath with overflowing bubbles and soft candlelight. The thought of David owning, dusting off, and lighting candles for me made me smile.
“Get in and try to relax,” he instructed. “I’ll be right back.”
Happy to be told what to do so I didn’t have to use my mushy brain, I eased in one limb at a time. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d taken a bath, and I’d forgotten how healing it could be. I sank down slowly and let the bubbles swallow me, so deep that I heard, rather than saw, David return.
I waved bubbles away to see him holding a bottle of red wine. “Last thing,” he said. “It’s Merlot. But if you need chardonnay in this moment, I’d understand.”
I half-smiled. He didn’t want me resorting back to my old self, but he was willing to allow it if I needed that. I didn’t. Not when kind, comforting, beautiful David offered me a different future. “Merlot sounds good,” I said.
Cityscape Affair Series: The Complete Box Set Page 66
