“Yeah, most of us agree. She’s in some shit, but she has people in her corner. In the office.” August smelled uncomfortable. “Listen, man. I’m not going to tell you how to go about your business—”
“Why do I feel like that’s exactly what you’re about to do?” Lorne asked with a slow shake of his head.
The other man made a noise in the back of his throat and glanced away, then back again. His jaw tightened with resolve. “I’ve been working with her for a few weeks now—”
“You left her out in the middle of a storm.”
“You telling me it’s all campfire roasts and dancing around up at that ranch?” August dropped his sunglasses down his nose and glared over the frames. “Yeah, thought not. You’re not police, but you understand making a place for yourself in an established clan. I regret it was a bad storm. I don’t regret seeing her find the balls to tell us all to fuck ourselves. In rougher language.”
No lie. A hint of respect laced his voice, too, which calmed Lorne’s bear a fraction. Pride that others recognized their mate’s toughness smoothed over the hard edges of his irritation.
Not his mate. Not when she rejected him.
The buzzing in his brain crackled painfully.
“She needs a partner,” August continued. “And I’m not talking about when she’s on duty. She needs one for all the other shit. She’s your mate, isn’t she?”
Lorne’s bear broke through the shackles he’d placed around the beast. He closed his eyes and counted to five, trying to hold back the flood of instinct brought on by the word. “No,” he growled. “She doesn’t want me.”
“Yeah, sure. Maybe. I’m guessing you got all protective of her and she bit your head off because she’s as tough as they come. Am I close?”
Lorne grunted.
“You see where you went wrong, don’t you? This woman has fought for everything. Then you come busting in and make her feel small. That’s why I’m telling you she needs a partner. She needs to know you have her back, through the good decisions and the fucked up ones. You can be the protective mate without stepping on her toes.”
Lorne twisted away from August and stared straight ahead. Open road, open possibilities. Only, a thick forest and jagged mountaintops blocked his view. “She’s not going to make it easy.”
“Oh, no. Not at all,” August laughed. “I expect she’ll make you crawl over glass before she even entertains the idea of mating you.” August grinned. “But the scars are worth it in the end. A woman like her... I’ve only seen one ready to latch on as hard as she could. My Alicia.”
Pride filled his scent and stabbed at Lorne. August was just one more example of what he lacked.
He seemed to be the only one who believed he couldn’t have that life.
“One more thing.” August reached into his pocket and drew out a slip of paper. “Your boy Ian. This is his last known address. He’d be smart to have moved on by now, but somehow I think the stubborn idiot gene runs deep in the family.”
Lorne took the paper carefully. “Why are you giving me this?”
“Because if it was my family messing with my mate, nothing would stop me. As a sworn agent, I stand by the law of the land.” A growl entered his voice, and he straightened. “As a shifter, I’d kill anyone who laid a hand on my mate.”
Chapter 20
Lorne pulled to a stop just down the road from Sloan’s home. He could see the end of her Jeep between the trees. His mate was inside. If he inhaled hard enough, he could probably catch a trace of her scent.
His shoulders tightened with protective unease. If he knew she was home, who else could be watching?
Ian just wouldn’t give up. Sloan, either, it seemed. Both were stubborn, but only one had good intentions in her heart.
He brought Ian’s attention on her. What would have been a minor brush with the law bloomed into revenge and obsession because of his connection.
She’d be better off if he just vanished. Her tears would dry up. She’d get her badge back. He’d find Ian and give him the end he deserved.
Lorne’s fingers wouldn’t budge. His bear grabbed him by the nape of the neck and shook him senseless.
She needed a partner, August said. Someone to watch over her and help her out when she was pinned down. Ethan made a similar point. She was determined to stick her foot in trouble. Only way to keep her safe was stepping in the same mess.
He’d been running for years from bonding to anyone. The last ones he made had been viciously snapped. His family, his clan, gone in an afternoon. He’d been made an outsider because he wanted to include someone in his life.
He’d kept his distance from everyone after that. Oh, he meddled and provoked to keep his world steady. But those actions weren’t spotted by the others, and he still got to keep his head low.
He was seeing them in a new light, though. They were the actions of a man desperate for some connection, and scared witless that he’d lose his entire world all over again. So he lied to himself about what he wanted or why he did the things he did. He kept to the shadows. He stuck to the background.
He couldn’t do that with Sloan. If he wanted her, he had to commit to everything. No slinking around. No setting her up on a pedestal to be handled gently. She needed someone on her level, be it in the muck or working to fix the world.
His brothers, his cousins, the rest of that monstrous clan, he couldn’t let them wrap him up in their ghosts. He had living to do. And that started with the woman who questioned him at every turn.
Frustrated growl building in his throat, Lorne killed his engine and flung himself out of his truck. Long strides carried him to the door he beat with a fierce knock.
He heard her slowly move inside and his bear ripped him to shreds. His fault she shuffled along. Those bruises were because of him.
Sloan cracked the door open an inch. She made a pissed off hissing sound and tried to slam the door in his face.
Lorne wedged his foot in the crack to keep it open. Asshole move, probably, but he needed to have words with her. “August sent me.”
Sloan stopped trying to squeeze his foot into oblivion. “He doesn’t know when to keep his beak out of someone’s business,” she said after a loaded moment.
“Please,” he murmured. “I need to talk to you.”
Finally, she stepped away from the door and let him follow her inside.
Her face looked even worse than he imagined. Unholy colors still splotched her skin in angry blues and purples. Her messy hair hadn’t seen a brush, and he wondered if she’d slept a wink.
Knives sliced through Lorne. His fault.
Sloan lifted her chin, blue eyes sparkling dangerously as if daring him to say anything.
He cleared his throat. “I’d be worried except for the fact that August is mated.”
“Why are you here, Lorne?” she asked without any amusement in her tone.
Well, there went trying to make her laugh. He pulled his Stetson off his head and toyed with the brim. “Because I couldn’t stay away.”
She moved slowly back to the kitchen, holding her side like she needed to keep herself together. Lorne winced and followed closely behind. No breaks, the doctor said. Just lots of bruising and slow, human healing.
Those facts didn’t make Sloan’s pain any easier to stomach.
She poured herself a glass of water and leaned against the counter. She took a sip, watching him over the rim of her glass with a blank expression.
The lack of an offer to sit or a drink didn’t go unnoticed. She didn’t expect him to stick around long.
Lorne needed to prove that assumption wrong.
He cleared his throat. None of the words he vaguely thought of to say seemed right. He wasn’t good at this shit. There was a reason why he kept quiet most of the time. Words weren’t easy. He needed time to think them over.
The blue of her eyes turned icy cold. No time to think. He was on the spot.
“We’re from different people, Sloan. That d
oesn’t make either of us right or wrong. We’re both.”
No response. Not even an arched eyebrow. Lorne wondered suddenly if that was how she got suspects talking. The disappointed mother routine had him stifling the urge to fidget under her stare.
And then his bear was off with sendings of her with a rounded stomach. Balls. He didn’t even know if she wanted kids. He’d make a terrible father. If he had cubs, though, he hoped they’d be raised up with a strong moral compass and even stronger spine, just like Sloan.
“I want you to be safe. Always. But you shouldn’t need to sacrifice any part of yourself to make me comfortable. You’re going to get in dangerous spots. You’re going to get cuts and scrapes. I have to accept that because those things make you the woman I can’t get out of my head. Even when those dangerous spots are connected to me.” His fingers tightened around the brim of his hat. “That’s the give and take of this thing. There’s no shutting the door on any part of our lives. You’re going to be touched by my life, same as I’d be touched by yours. Warning you away from my troubles isn’t how a mate should behave.”
She sucked in a tiny breath. Her hand flattened against the counter as she steadied herself. “Mate?” she asked softly.
Lorne met her eyes. He wanted her to see the honesty in his. “Mate. I’ve been running from it the moment I first met you, thinking I was protecting you somehow. That wasn’t fair to you. I took that choice from you, instead of giving it to you. So here it is. I come from a fucked up clan of bears, with at least one still surviving and trying to hurt me. I keep my distance from everyone because there’s a real chance one of those fucked up bears will finish the job they started years ago. I have blood on my hands, Sloan, and you’re a good woman. You don’t deserve my dirt.”
She pressed her lips together and fixed him with a level look. “I’ve been beaten up and suspended from my job. I am filthy with mud.”
His fault. His mud.
“What happened?”
Sloan turned back to the sink and refilled her glass. Her scent was a mix of hurt and anger. Still quiet, she shambled past him and slowly settled on the couch.
Lorne itched to follow her and pull her into his arms. He wanted to tuck her under blankets and bring her anything she needed. His bear demanded it. There was no blood to be spilled at that moment; his mate needed him.
He scratched at his beard. Her choice. She had his words. He wouldn’t push her to choose him back.
His bear roared in his head.
“I’ll leave if you don’t want me here. I just needed you to know—”
“Stay.” The word punched out from her lips.
He stepped through the kitchen, following the path she took. He took a seat at the other end of the couch, careful to give her space. “Your turn to let me in.”
“I didn’t want you to have a monopoly on stupid actions, so I took one for the team. I lied to August about having a doctor’s appointment, and tricked him into a stakeout.” She shrugged off her wry smile. “I didn’t want you to find Ian first. I didn’t want you to get more blood on your hands. I thought if I could bring him in, I could save you some hurt. And I was pissed at what he did to me.
“I upset a lot of people when I reported my old partner. My punishment didn’t stop with my transfer here. I don’t think they ever really stopped trying to fuck with me, you know? It just got harder for them. I wasn’t in the same city, so they had to work to make me miserable.”
“Sloan, what happened?”
“Messages, at first. Letters in the mail about how I’ll get mine one of these days. Calling me Snitch Bitch like some playground bully. Snake skins because I’m a snake.”
She stopped suddenly and chewed on her lower lip, looking away from him. It took every ounce of willpower to swallow back the growl and urge to track down the asshole who made her feel unsafe and unwelcome.
Lorne crawled his hand closer and squeezed hers. “What else?”
“A photo. The first time we kissed.”
They’d both been watched then. Ian was after him, but someone else was after her.
Lorne fought against the instincts wanting to ball his fists and make the problem disappear. Right then, he was needed at her side. Partners worked together. One couldn’t ride off into the sunset without the other.
“And now Internal Affairs is breathing down my neck, using the whole Ian bullshit as an excuse to make it look like I have a problem with shifters.” Another shrug, but her scent was furious. “It’s Jimmy, I know it. He just won’t take responsibility for his crimes. I’m the one at fault because he couldn’t accept not being at the top of the food chain.”
“Why stay?” Lorne raised his hands before she could snap. After what he’d promised her, he was sure that was where she immediately jumped. “I’m not saying give up on the job. But there are other places you could work. Hell, you could probably get a job working on an enclave’s police force.”
Her shoulders slumped like she’d never even considered the idea. Maybe she hadn’t.
“Leaving doesn’t feel right. My dad, he was a cop. He always fought for good. I want to do that, too. Changing one mind can make a difference. One correction of an injustice. The world doesn’t have to be a shitty place. Giving up on fixing things feels like giving up on him. Quitting feels like letting them win.” She shook her head in defiance. “Screw them. They won’t break me. No matter what they try next.”
“Fuck ‘em.” He scooted closer. Sloan stiffened when he draped an arm over her shoulder, then settled against him with a small sigh. “No matter what you choose to do, it’ll work out.”
“How can you say that? You can’t predict the future.”
Her breath was soft against his chest. Sadness filled her scent. Lorne couldn’t stop his fingers stroking the silky strands of her hair. Perfect. Not the emotions. He hated for her to feel anything but happy. The sharing, however. That felt right.
He nuzzled a cheek against her hair. “Because I know you’re stubborn and tough enough to kick down any door standing in your way.”
Sloan pushed away from him. Blue eyes held him in place and she lifted her chin. “You know none of this is your fault, right? I don’t want you here because you think it’s the noble thing to do.”
Lorne blinked in surprise at the sudden change in direction. “My cousin. My fault.” He brought her knuckles to his lips. “But I’m here because of you. I felt like I was dying without you.”
A smile ghosted her lips. “Stomach all twisted up and migraine with the force of a thousand hangovers?”
“A million.” And she was the cure to them all.
“Good. Call that your penance.” She watched him, serious again. “You’re not responsible for someone else’s actions, Lorne. What happened back then and what is happening now are on them, not you. The only thing you did was care. Someone who looks at that and decides it’s wrong is the one who needs their head checked. Not. You.”
His heart split wide open, so wide that he hurt to consider sewing it closed again. In the middle of her own crisis, she worried about him. Selfless woman. She was too good for him and he was too selfish to give her up.
What had the mates told her the night they all got drinks together? The world was one way, then another. He felt those words in his bones. He couldn’t give up on her, just like she refused to give up when confronted with any problem in the world. She felt too perfect in his arms.
The slip of paper in his pocket burned through his jeans as he drew her back against him. Maybe he wasn’t responsible for Ian’s actions. He could take action anyways.
He needed to set the world right for her.
* * *
“Ready?” Lorne asked quietly.
He looked at the men with him. Alex looked positively crazy, eyes wide and lips peeled back in a silent snarl. Ethan was more reserved, but just as ready for the fight. Hunter bounced on his toes, while Jesse stared straight ahead at the door with grim determination written on his face
.
Fur and dominance and anger colored their collective scents. His bear rolled through him. They were clan. They were family. Together, they would keep all their mates safe.
Together.
The word echoed through his head. He was finally taking his place in the clan. No more working from the background or pretending he didn’t give a shit. Ethan told him he needed to decide where he belonged. The elusive home was made clear when Sloan stepped into his life. He wanted to stand by her side and he wanted to do it with the men who were ready to throw down and fight next to him.
The Black Claw clan was his family. They accepted all the parts of him, not just the ones that meshed with their warped view of the world. Humans, shifters, it didn’t matter to them. They were just trying to get by.
They wouldn’t judge him for finding happiness with someone unexpected. They’d give him as much shit as any other day, then clap him on the back and wish him congratulations.
They were better than the Bennetts that raised him.
Lorne kicked open the door of the motel. Ian jerked awake, but the men streaming in with him each grabbed a limb and held him down even in his wild thrashing.
Lorne stuffed a cloth in Ian’s mouth before slapping a strip of duct tape over it. Then he wound the roll around his ankles to keep him secure.
The glowing of Ian’s eyes meant his bear was ready to rip through him and maul all their faces. Too bad Lorne nicked the pair of silver cuffs Sloan carried. He slapped them around Ian’s wrists and watched the glow of his inner animal die.
Silently, the clan helped him carry Ian to the waiting pickup and tossed him into the bed like a sack of grain. Three hopped in the back to make sure Ian didn’t buck himself over the edges.
No one said a word as they drove back toward Bearden, then blew right past the turnoff. A little further, and Lorne killed the headlights and turned the truck off the road. Empty land stretched out in front of them, as quiet as the grave.
He knew the spot he needed. The pile of dirt served as a marker under the dark and cloudless sky. He pulled to a stop and unloaded with the rest of the others.
Breaking Fate: Book Three: Black Claw Ranch Page 16
