“Yes, they’re family,” Andy said.
“Well, as I said last night, the type of leukemia that Gabriel has is not hereditary,” the doctor began. “It’s aggressive. The cells are invading the marrow and will spread very quickly to the spinal fluid, the spleen, the liver and the brain if we’re not aggressive with our treatment. We need to hit it hard and fast. The chemo is going to make Gabriel very sick. He’ll have to stay here, as his immune system is going to be destroyed. It’s imperative we find a match for Gabriel now, and ideally we’ll be able to harvest and freeze the donor sample.”
“Wait, I was tested last night. I’m his mother. Shouldn’t I be a perfect match?” Laura asked. She glanced up at Andy, and she knew, just by the hard set of his jaw, that he was holding on to something. “Andy?”
“You’re not a match,” Andy said. “We need a better match. A match he can only get from his biological relatives.”
Laura stared up at him, trying to understand what he was talking about. Then it hit her, this awful feeling that she wasn’t going to like what he said one bit. “So what are you saying, Andy? Please tell me you’re not considering…”
“I have to, Laura. I’m sorry. I didn’t want you to find out this way, but I’m going to find your parents and the kid who fathered Gabriel.”
Her heart was pounding at the thought of Andy contacting her parents or, worse yet, Tyler. She didn’t want to relive the humiliation, even though Andy knew everything she’d been through. She instantly felt guilty for thinking that way. She would do anything for Gabriel, and so would Andy, but she couldn’t help but be embarrassed. Andy’s cousin and his wife were listening, no doubt wondering what skeletons she had in her closet. She ached, thinking of what they must think of her.
The doctor was shaking his head, and Laura wondered why. She wanted to cry. Her emotions were hammering her good sense and turning her into a basket case, which she could have sworn she’d never been before. She was starting to wonder how much a person could really take before they snapped.
“We need to get each of them tested,” the doctor said. “Wherever they are, we can make arrangements at a local hospital for testing and extraction of the marrow. Just let me know, and, as I said…”
“I know. Time is not on our side. I’ll get on it,” Andy said.
Neil stepped forward beside Andy and offered Laura a sympathetic smile. “What do we need to do? How can we help?” he asked, looking from Andy to the doctor.
“Gabriel is going to need someone to be with him while he goes through this,” the doctor said. “We can keep him comfortable. Children are actually much stronger when dealing with this than most adults are. However, he’s going to be scared, and…”
“He won’t be alone. I’m not leaving my son,” Laura snapped. “When are you starting?”
“Right away. Once we start the chemo, and kill all the cancer cells in the marrow, we need to move on to the stem cell transplant.” The doctor took all of them in, and all Laura felt was nausea at the thought of what her son was going to have to go through. At the same time, she really didn’t understand how bad it was going to get. She’d have given anything to be able to trade places with him.
“Wherever you need us, Candy and I are here to help,” Neil said. He set his hand on Andy’s shoulder and squeezed. “We need a plan. Let’s figure this out and get a handle on what we’ll do first.” Neil took charge, all confidence. Candy slid comfortably and easily to his side as his arm hooked around her shoulder. “Let’s get some coffee, clear our heads and we’ll figure this out together.”
Laura looked to Andy, who was looking so tired. She realized that having Neil here was probably the best thing for them; and, just maybe, having that one clear head would keep her and Andy from completely falling apart.
Chapter 17
Laura was an absolute mess. She had to keep turning her head so Gabriel wouldn’t see her cry, but Andy could see how she kept wiping at her eyes. When the babies started fussing, he hoped Laura would take them out and nurse them; but he also knew she was in no shape to go off alone right now. Andy looked to Neil and the babies, hoping he understood. He also kind of hoped Neil’s new wife, Candy, would step in and help; but she looked about as uncomfortable with Laura as Laura was with her.
“Oh, look at you!” Neil cooed as he squatted down to see the babies. Both were awake. “Now, which one is this? It’s kind of hard to tell.”
“That’s Jeremy. He’s the demanding one,” Andy added as Neil scooped his son up. He was such a natural with babies, and so comfortable, too. “Laura?” Andy said.
She was sitting with Gabriel even though he was asleep again. She jerked her head up and then stood, her eyes red and her lids puffy. She started toward the baby Neil was holding—she seemed to be one step from falling apart.
“Laura, you need to get some sleep,” Andy said. “Maybe you can take her home, Neil, Candy?”
“I’m not leaving, Andy,” she said.
He knew he needed to get her to relax, but he also needed to be with Gabriel. He swept his hand through his hair and absently noticed how uncomfortable Candy was when Neil stepped toward her with the baby.
“Look at him, isn’t he so cute?” Neil said. “It’s the Friessen nose.”
Candy smiled up at Neil but made no move to take Jeremy. After what she’d been through, losing her baby and undergoing an emergency hysterectomy on their wedding day, Andy had wondered whether his cousin’s marriage was done. They truly loved each other, and both of them had climbed over a tremendous hurdle to find their way back to each other. Andy didn’t know if he would have still married her. Children were important. The thought of his wife not being able to have his babies, of not having Chelsea and Jeremy…well, his cousin was a better man than he was.
“And the demanding Friessen attitude, too,” Andy added, nodding at his son.
“Hmm, we are, at that, aren’t we?” Neil said. The words should have lightened the mood in the room, but Laura was unmoved beside him.
“I’ll take him. He’s probably hungry,” she said.
Neil set the baby in her arms and smiled at her. He was trying to ease her stress, but Laura, being Laura, was nervous, self-conscious and overtired. She wasn’t about to relax. Neil gave Andy a look over Laura’s head, his expression completely alert as he gestured to the door.
Andy nodded. “Laura, I’ll be right back. Anyone want a coffee?”
Neil said something to Candy and kissed her on the cheek. She smiled, touching his arm and nodding in response to whatever it was he’d said. In the hallway, Neil set his hand on Andy’s shoulder and gave him a quick embrace. “You okay?” he asked.
Andy took a deep breath and raked both hands through his hair. “Just tired—this all came out of left field.”
“Laura looks on edge, exhausted.” Neil gestured to the room.
Andy could only see the side of his wife as she sat in the chair, probably to nurse his son. Candy moved away from the door. He couldn’t make out what she was saying to Laura, but hopefully it was something that would draw her out of her shell. Anything to help.
“She didn’t get any sleep last night, and she was at home alone with the babies,” Andy said. “I couldn’t do anything for her—I needed to be here for Gabriel. She’s a wreck, and…”
“I can see that. I’m just glad you called. Mom and Dad said to call them if you want them to come, too. They’ll be on the next flight out. Mom didn’t want to get underfoot, especially since you just moved here.”
“Appreciate it,” Andy said. He’d been considering off and on whether to call them, too. His aunt and uncle needed to be told as well—but for now, just having Neil and Candy there was enough.
“Dad said to let him know if he can do anything at his end.”
Neil just nodded to that. Although he would have liked to have Rodney and Becky here; having Neil meant a lot to him. Maybe it was just as well, as he started wondering where to put them. They had barely move
d in, and they really weren’t set up for guests.
“So, tell me about Laura’s family,” Neil said. “I understand they’re not close. Actually, I don’t know anything about them, Andy,” he added as they lingered outside the room, far enough that Laura wouldn’t be able to hear.
“I don’t know Sue and George Parnell—and I never wanted to know them,” Andy said. He didn’t miss the mix of sympathy and shrewdness in Neil’s expression. His cousin had a way of listening completely, taking in everything they said—and everything they didn’t. That was probably why he was so successful at everything he did in business. In Andy’s eyes, everything Neil touched turned to gold.
“It was hard for Laura, and I only know what she’s told me,” he began. “Just hearing how bad something was, is completely different from actually experiencing it. I saw how hard it was for her, alone with a baby. She’d just turned sixteen when she had Gabriel. She’d made a mistake. The kid who got her pregnant turned his back on her, and her parents threw her out. She struggled, working part-time jobs, living in shitholes. She wouldn’t give him up. She loves him.”
“Wow, admirable—and unfair. Wouldn’t it have been easier to give him up to a family who could give him everything he needed?”
Andy was surprised Neil would say that, and he had to take a step back. “She loved him. He was hers. Would you have given up your kid?” he asked.
Neil didn’t answer for a minute; then his expression changed to something dark and hard. Andy had never seen that before, and he wasn’t sure what to make of it. “No, if I had a kid right now, he’d have everything, but I don’t and Candy can’t have any. There are so many couples looking to adopt a baby from a young mother like Laura. I can see the other side, where Gabriel wouldn’t have had to struggle; where Laura could have gone on to college and had a life without suffering. Sorry,” he added.
Andy crossed his arms and took in a side of Neil he really didn’t like. “I hope you would never say that to Laura. She’d never forgive you, and I wouldn’t, either—if you hurt her. She’s had more than her share of pain in this lifetime, Neil, and if she had given up Gabriel, I wouldn’t have met her, let alone married her. I’d probably be the same selfish prick I was.”
Neil reached over and grabbed his shoulder. “Hey, I’m sorry, Andy. I didn’t mean it like that, and I would never say that to your wife. I’m sorry about blurting it out now. It’s just…I planned on having a family with Candy. In Mexico, we see so many hungry kids living in poverty, and it’s jaded me. I notice it now, but I didn’t mean to lay it on you. I like Laura; and I see that she loves her son. I know you love him, too. I can see that. I can see why you hate the idea of talking to her family after they abandoned her. You’re going to call them, aren’t you?”
“Yeah, and that kid who got her pregnant. It’s just…” Andy wasn’t sure he wanted to voice his fears, but in the back of his mind, the idea of someone else being Gabriel’s father, being in his life, didn’t sit right. A whole lot of what-ifs were starting to take shape.
“It’s just what, Andy? What are you worried about? I can see you’re tired. I can tell, because you’re not hiding things well.”
Andy sucked in a deep breath and ran his hands over his head again. “There are just too many loose ends. Legally, Gabriel is not mine. If something happened to Laura…” He hesitated. He didn’t want to finish that thought. The thought that had been there all night as he sat alone in the hospital chair beside Gabriel’s bed; watching the little boy he felt was his in every sense of the word—except in the eyes of the law. “I screwed up. With everything that happened... moving to Montana, I meant to take steps to legally adopt him.”
“Well, first things first, Andy. You need to talk to these people. I’ll go with you. I think you need someone objective. Someone who knows how to swing a deal and think fast on his feet.”
“I can think fast and I’ve put together more deals than I can count,” Andy snapped.
“Maybe so—but reverse the positions, Andy. This is your kid, and you’re emotionally involved. I can bet you’d rather plant your fist in something or someone than have to sit down and be reasonable.”
If he thought about it long enough, Andy was sure he would agree. However, Neil was being far more honest than he wanted.
Chapter 18
Laura was squeezed in the backseat of Andy’s truck, in between Chelsea and Jeremy, in the spot where Gabriel usually sat. She had never sat back here and the view was surreal. She was so tired that her head ached.
Candy was in the passenger seat beside Neil, who had spoken to her only once, when keying the address into the GPS. He spoke with his wife, an easy conversation that flowed back and forth; though Laura wasn’t really paying attention to what they said to each other. She didn’t miss their linked hands, their fingers resting together on the center console.
“Laura, you all right back there?” Neil asked, and she met the amber sparkle of his eyes in the rear-view mirror. He was such a handsome man, so clean cut. He resembled Andy in many ways, and in many others he didn’t. Her husband had a shrewdness she didn’t believe Neil had.
Candy turned her head when she didn’t answer. “You’re tired, aren’t you?”
“I am. My head hurts. I just don’t know whether I’ll be able to sleep if I lie down,” she said, wishing she was still back at the hospital—reliving in her mind how sick Gabriel had been when they left. After his first course of treatment, he had been wiped out, but had thrown up only once. He seemed to find comfort lying in Andy’s arms. “They said there would be mouth sores, hair loss, nausea, vomiting, diarrhea and loss of appetite,” Laura murmured, saying out loud what had been running through her mind over and over again.
Candy rustled in the front seat, leaning around the console. “Who said that?” she asked.
Laura realized they were both watching her; Neil in the rear-view mirror and Candy, who looked over to her husband and back at Laura again. “The doctor did, or was it the oncologist? Those are the side effects for Gabriel. How does he deserve this? It’s not fair,” she said. Her chest ached from the sorrow she’d been trying to bottle up and all the endless tears that kept flowing. Andy was tired, too, but he was handling it way better than she was. She rubbed her forehead and tucked her knotted hair behind her ears. She couldn’t for the life of her force herself to smile or even make an effort through the agony. She had hoped never to feel this kind of pain again.
“It’s going to be okay, Laura,” Candy said. “Children handle things better than adults do, and he’s going to get through this. He has you and Andy, and you love him. Having parents like you two is going to get him through this. You just have to believe he’s going to be okay. It’s one day at a time, Laura.”
Laura didn’t miss the way Neil responded when Candy spoke; running his thumb over their intertwined hands. Laura could only nod.
The sun was setting as they started up the incline to their new home and the familiar pickup that always stirred her anxiety came into view. “I forgot about Ladystar,” she said. There was a horse trailer attached to the truck.
“Whose pickup is that?” Neil asked as he pulled up beside it. Just as Kim came around the house, leading Ladystar on her halter. “Who’s the woman?” he added, and Candy glanced back at Laura.
“Kim, our neighbor,” she said, wondering if she sounded as bitter to them as she did to her own ears. Candy turned her head ever so slowly toward Neil and they exchanged a look. Both turned to Laura before Neil stepped out of the truck. She couldn’t make out what he was saying, but he was friendly; stepping right over to Kim and shaking her hand. She waved through the windshield at Laura.
Candy opened the back door. “I’ll help you in with the babies,” she said. She started to lift the car seat out when Neil approached from behind and set his hands on her hips, moving her aside and lifting Jeremy out.
“Candy, why don’t you grab the bag from the gift shop?” he said, and Candy lifted a large plasti
c bag out along with her purse. Neil held out his hand to help Laura.
“I can take Chelsea,” she said, reaching for the baby carrier.
“No, I’ve got her. You go on in with my wife. I’ll bring both the babies, our luggage and anything else there is.”
He was such a gentleman. That was something Andy would have said and done.
Laura stopped at the steps. “Hi, Kim. Thank you for taking care of Andy’s horse.” She was feeling bad for being so jealous of a woman who didn’t have to be here and helping out the way she was.
“You’re welcome, Laura. Glad to help. How’s your little boy?” she asked as she loaded Ladystar in the trailer.
“Sick. He’s started chemo. Andy’s still with him.”
Kim just nodded. “My prayers are with you and your family. Let me know if there’s anything else I can do.” She locked up the back door of the trailer.
“I know Andy has probably thanked you for taking his horse and for looking after her. It helps us more than you know; not having to worry about her being here all alone.”
“She’ll fit in fine at my place with my horses. She won’t be lonely, and I’ll keep her as long as you need,” Kim said. Laura wondered if she’d picked up on all her jealous thoughts, because she didn’t linger. She just offered a sympathetic smile, waved and slid into her truck before pulling away.
From the door behind her, Candy was watching. Laura started toward her, and an icy chill raced through her veins as soon as she touched the knob. She patted her pockets. “Oh, shit, I don’t have keys.” She touched her forehead and dug her nails in. “Dammit, I am so sorry.”
“What’s wrong?” Neil called out.
“Laura doesn’t have keys,” Candy said.
“I can’t believe how stupid I am! I didn’t even think to bring any keys with me. Andy has the keys to the house. I’m sorry, we’re going to have to drive all the way back to the hospital.” She wanted to cry, and she felt horrible, as if she was responsible for this entire mess.
Danger Deception Devotion The Firsts Page 41
