by Terra Wolf
“You know I used to party a lot,” he said, and she was too surprised he was actually sharing to say a word. She wasn’t sure if he saw her nod, but he went on anyway. “All the rumors are true. Hell, the truth is probably worse. I drank a lot, and I was always the one suggesting a bonfire in the middle of the drought, a midnight swim in dark water, drag racing in an ice storm.”
He chuckled darkly and shook his head. “I always guessed one of my dumb dares would do me in, but in the end, she was just a girl. And I was just a guy wanting what every guy wants.”
She reached for him and laid her hand over his lap. “Xavier, you don’t have to—”
He laid a hand over hers and looked over. “I need to,” he said, and the exposed cut of his words made her heart ache for him.
“She and I were out by the lake one night, too far from any tower for proper reception. I’d begun working for Search and Rescue the summer before so I knew the drill. I was on call. I should never have driven up that far, but she was ready, and I was far too willing and distracted. Hormones. Anyway, a call came in. A brutal ice storm on the peaks the day prior and the melt on such a warm day had caused a slide. A woman was trapped. When Dad couldn’t reach me, he went up alone. He never made it back.”
“God, Xavier.” Laurel couldn’t find the words. She hurt for him, for the guy he was then and the mistake. The guilt, probably. And she finally understood his reluctance with her. She squeezed his hand.
Xavier cleared his throat. “He and the woman both died that night while I had a mediocre lay with a girl I never spoke to again.”
“I’m so sorry for you. Losing your dad that way… That must have been awful.” And the guilt… that was what haunted him now. “Thank you for sharing that with me,” she told him, touched.
“I figured when you knew, it would change things,” he said.
“It does,” she admitted and rushed on when she saw the uncertainty flash in his eyes. “It makes me even more determined to be myself. To stop hiding who I am. From you and everyone else, because maybe then you’ll do the same. We’re both living in hiding. Hiding from people in my life who are anti-shifter is one thing. The world will always be full of people who don’t like me for some reason or another. I’m learning to accept that. But you. You’re hiding from yourself, Xavier. From your future. I don’t know how to fix that.”
She thought he’d push her away. Storm off or tell her to leave it alone, something an alpha would do. Instead, Xavier reached for her and pulled her into his lap, smoothing her hair and pressing kisses to her temple. She was too shocked to do more than let him.
“You’re right about me but not about the differences in us,” he said.
“What do you mean?”
“The reasons we each have for hiding. The ones we are hiding from. They’re the same thing, love. We can fix each other.”
He kissed her then and any doubt she’d had about his words melted away. She had no idea if she could be fixed. That meant coming clean about her animal to the rest of the world. That thought still terrified her. Humans weren’t nice after that. Hell, neither were shifters. She didn’t know if she could be fixed, or if she wanted to. But here was her chance to find out.
She wound her arms around Xavier’s neck and held on tight as he deepened the kiss. Desire flooded her like a warm spray of water. When he parted her lips with his tongue, she rolled her hips reflexively against him. He growled into her mouth, and she prayed for the liquid heat to turn to fire, burning their clothes away. She vaguely hoped Xavier’s truck windows were tinted enough to shield her if anyone passed by, but then she was swept away in his kiss.
As if reading her mind, Xavier’s hands wandered, picking wildly at the hem of her blouse before sliding underneath the smooth fabric.
“I need to touch you,” he whispered.
She gasped as his fingers dipped inside her bra and brushed over her taut nipple. One and then the other and back again. With his other hand, he found his way to the seam of her pants and pressed his thumb against her clit. Laurel couldn’t think, could barely breathe.
“Please,” she begged, writhing against him now, half desperate for him.
She arched her back, tossing her head to the side and offering her neck without a thought.
Xavier licked and nipped at her before trailing kisses down her collarbone. She tried not to acknowledge the disappointment as he ignored her offering. She’d let him claim her right now if he wanted. But he didn’t. Neither of them would be fixed overnight.
Xavier unclasped her pants and slipped his fingers inside, sliding them against her clit until she squirmed.
“I’m going to make you come for me,” Xavier said, his hot breath against her neck.
“Please,” she begged, for what exactly she didn’t even know. For him, for her orgasm, for everything.
Xavier slid his finger lower, pushing inside her, and Laurel rolled her hips to meet him. He set an excruciatingly slow pace, and Laurel forced herself to slow with him. He dipped his tongue into her mouth, thrusting gently against her. Closer and closer to the edge, but only by inches. Laurel wanted power.
When he slid a second finger inside her, she lost it. “Faster,” she said against his mouth. “Please.”
She grabbed Xavier’s wrist and squeezed, guiding him into a faster pace. He growled and gave it to her. Hard and fast and frantic, he thrust into her. His kisses became harder too, catching her lips in his teeth as he nipped and licked at her. With a final thrust of his hand, he sent her up and then crashing over.
Laurel held on tight, her hips rocking as the aftershocks continued. Xavier stroked her softly, encouraging her to take her time riding them out. When she finally stilled, he was there, his kisses soft now. Inviting. Comforting. Easy.
Laurel’s limbs felt liquid. She hugged him, smiling as she stroked his scruffy cheek. Xavier was right, and they would fix each other. They had to; there was no going back for her.
Claiming or no, she was his.
The sun had already dipped behind the mountains, throwing shadows over the parking lot as Laurel followed Xavier onto the deck at Mack’s. She understood now why no one else bothered to use the deck out here. Only shifters wouldn’t be bothered by the drastic temperature drop when the sun went down. Even in August, it was chilly with the sun gone.
Her hand was in Xavier’s as she walked. She spotted the Wilde crew at their usual table but stalled when she noticed Lucas wasn’t in his seat. He’d moved to the far end, leaving her the empty chair beside his alpha. Her heart panged, and she blinked back an unexpected tear.
“You all right?” Xavier asked in her ear.
“Better than,” she assured him. Who knew it could feel like this to have friends? To be accepted.
Lucas caught her eye. She smiled over at him in thanks as she slid into the chair Xavier held out for her. He ducked his head but not before she caught a returned smile of his own.
“Mr. and Mrs. Alpha have arrived,” Jake announced.
Xavier scowled as he took his seat but squeezed her hand.
“Fucking finally,” Harley muttered before draining his beer. “I’m starving.”
All of them already had a mug set in front of them, including her.
“I ordered you what’s on tap,” Nash said. “If you don’t like it, I’ll drink it.”
“Shit. I already called it,” Jake put in.
Laurel smiled across the table first at Nash and then Jake. “This is great, thanks.” She held her mug up and gulped while the boys looked on with widening eyes.
“Daaamn. Mrs. Alpha can drink,” Jake said in awe.
Laurel emptied the mug and set it down, wiping the corner of her mouth as delicately as she could. She peeked at Xavier, self-conscious now. She’d been parched after their little interlude in his truck but wondered if maybe she should’ve sipped instead.
Xavier blinked, shaking his head as if to clear it. “That was…”
“Unladylike?” she finished
, wincing.
“Impressive as hell,” he said and planted a smacking kiss on her lips.
The crew applauded her. Even Harley clapped three times before scowling at her again.
Laurel laughed, the relief and happiness at their acceptance was so overwhelming. Laughing was better than crying, she told herself. And she was tempted to do both. Geez, how had she lived this long without friends?
A face across the deck caught her attention. She looked over and went still. Her heart dropped into her stomach as she recognized Scott, her assistant. He stood near the door, half-turned like he’d been headed inside. He looked frozen in place, just as shocked to see her.
“Laurel?” Xavier’s voice called her back, but she couldn’t take her eyes from the wiry man’s face.
Scott’s shock turned slowly to confusion. His brow wrinkled, and he swept a look over the rest of the crew before returning to her. Laurel stood quickly, almost knocking her chair over in the process. Lucas caught it like he had with Xavier’s the other day. She ignored him, ignored them all, and rushed to Scott just as he disappeared inside the bar.
“Scott!” She caught up to him inside, grabbing his elbow and then dropping it again when she realized what she’d done.
Crap. Physical touch was not appropriate in a professional relationship.
“Ms. Adams, what can I do for you?” Scott’s voice was nasally as always, but there was a coldness he’d never used at the office.
Surprise, she told herself. Of course, it was weird seeing her outside the office. Especially in such a relaxed setting.
“I just wanted to say hello,” she said, kicking herself for coming over here in the first place. What the heck was she supposed to say? Are you going to tell anyone you saw me with the most notorious crew of shifters in three states? Probably a little brazen.
“Hello,” Scott returned, still curt. He shot a disdainful look over her shoulder to Xavier and the others.
Laurel grit her teeth. “Look, I know it’s probably a surprise seeing me with the Wilde crew. Or seeing me here at all.” Scott’s brow rose, but he didn’t interrupt. Something about that irritated her, and she went straight into boss-lady mode. Her voice went hard as she said, “I just wanted to be polite and say hello, but let’s be clear. Our personal lives are our own, especially outside working hours. I trust you’ll give us both the respect we deserve by not bringing this back into the office tomorrow. Or ever.”
Scott’s eyes narrowed, but Laurel’s alpha act drained away. She knew if he argued or threatened or said anything but “yes, ma’am,” she’d fold. That was not happening. So she made the only move left to a boss-lady. She turned on her heel and strode away.
It might not shut Scott up forever. Probably tomorrow, there’d be consequences for her new alliance. Friends, she corrected herself. But tonight, she was determined to remain in control of her own choices. Tonight, at least, she would not hide.
Chapter 10
Xavier bided his time. Laurel had been polite but distant over dinner and drinks and then all through the drive home. He had a hunch about the reason too. She’d gone white as a sheet at the sight of the kid in the glasses at Mack’s. She’d torn out in a panic, and he’d almost followed, but he knew her better than to barge into her problems. It would have only backfired on him. So he’d stayed behind and turned his animal hearing up to full volume, listening in from a safe distance instead.
Her co-worker hadn’t been overly friendly or accepting of her company, and Laurel was worried. He hadn’t been surprised at that. Or the way she’d tried going all alpha to cover up her fear. He knew now that was what she did.
At the table on the deck, none of the crew said a word about it which let him know they’d heard it too.
Fuck, his woman was complicated. And bossy. And too damn proud to admit when she was coming at a problem wrong.
At the Lodge, he let her go up to her room without a fight. He went to his, just down the hall, and waited for her to come to him, but she never did. The evening turned to midnight and still, Laurel didn’t come to him. He should have guessed she wouldn’t, but it still stung after everything they’d shared.
By one in the morning, he’d tossed and turned enough. He couldn’t take this shit anymore. He threw the covers back and padded to her room, flinging the door open without bothering to knock or tread softly. He stood over her sleeping form, his anger dissipating at the sight of her all tucked into the downy comforter, hands curled under her chin.
God, she looked so helpless.
His bear took one look at her and wanted only to protect.
He hesitated in waking her, warring with himself over why he was pushing her so hard in the first place. He was just as scared as she was about what it would mean to claim each other. A mate. He’d been running from that idea for ten years now. He couldn’t be that guy again. The one who shrugged off his duties for sex or love or whatever the fuck.
Laurel stirred, and Xavier felt all of his reservations crumble. He eased in beside her, careful to not jostle her too much and wake her. She sighed as he pulled her gently against him, tucking her close.
“Mmm,” she mumbled, cuddling against his bare chest. The ends of her hair tickled but he didn’t mind.
He ran his hands over her hip, relishing the silky fabric of her nightie against his fingers. Of course, she had sexy pajamas. All the best things about her were hidden away from everyone else, and for the first time, he wasn’t going to complain about that.
He ran his hand along her hipbone and down her thigh, and Laurel sighed. “This is either the best dream I’ve ever had, or the creepiest cop-a-feel anyone’s ever given me,” she said lazily. There was teasing in her words, and again, Xavier shoved his earlier temper aside in favor of playfulness.
“How about we call it something in between,” he said, nipping her earlobe.
Laurel squeaked, and he laughed until she moved against him, rolling her hips forward. His laughter died, and he tightened his grip on her, dragging her in and pressing them together.
“You want the sex of your dreams, come and get it, Mrs. Alpha,” he said.
Laurel’s body stiffened and then relaxed, and he knew she was fully awake now. He wondered if she’d object to his label for her, but she surprised him by slithering down his body instead.
She disappeared underneath the covers, trailing kisses down his abs and belly until her mouth dipped lower still. When her lips closed over the head of his swollen cock, he held his breath against the snarl that wanted release. He’d have to pace himself carefully, or a snarl wasn’t the only thing that he’d release too fast.
Down the hall, a phone rang. He recognized his cell’s ring tone. He glanced at the bedside clock. It was late. What the hell?
Laurel paused, and he could feel the friction where her mouth, hot and ready, hovered just over the head of his dick. She didn’t move or speak as she waited for his reaction, and he cursed inwardly at the timing. There was only one reason his phone would be ringing so late. An emergency call. Someone on the mountain needed his help.
God damn it all.
All of his fears came crashing over him. He had to choose all over again. Laurel and a swift release, or saving a life. He groaned. He already knew it wasn’t a choice. “Laurel, I have to go.”
Laurel made her way out from underneath the comforter. Determination etched on her face in shadowy lines. “A rescue call?” she asked.
He nodded. “That’s the duty line. This late, it’s got to mean a rescue call.”
Somewhere in the house, a bedroom door clicked open. Another of the crew was already up.
Laurel threw the covers back and went to her closet, yanking clothes out. Quiet, methodical. She threw her pants on and turned, her brows rising. “What are you still doing here?” She gestured to the door. “Go get dressed. We have to go.”
He rose, his chest swelling with love and pride for his woman. She got it without him having to say a word. “I’m sorry,” h
e began.
“Xavier Wilde, you will not apologize. Now go answer that call. If it’s an emergency, we’ll both suit up and drive out and save somebody. Because that’s our job. And even though you can love me more than your job, you will always save lives when they need saving. No matter what. Do you hear me? Now, go!”
“Hot damn,” Xavier breathed, completely awed by her ferocity and passion.
He rose and headed for the door, but he stalled and turned back to her. “Laurel, I want to tell you—”
“Later,” she said, practically shoving him into the hall. “Go.” She pointed a slender finger at the door, staring down at him with fiery eyes, and Xavier knew then he’d never loved anymore more than he loved Laurel Adams right now. His Mrs. Alpha. And as soon as he finished saving a life, he’d be sure to tell her.
Chapter 11
Laurel surveyed the assembled mess of rescue vehicles and police cars that lined the road’s edge. She chewed on her thumbnail, searching until she finally caught sight of the truck pulling in at the end of the row of cars. It was white, making it easier to spot the DOT logo on the side.
She rushed for the car just as a man got out and came forward.
“Gerald,” she said, half-relieved but half-nauseous with nerves.
“Laurel,” Gerald greeted her. In that one word was a small thread of warmth. He’d been the nicest man she’d worked for and the friendliest, still careful to keep a professional distance but willing to relax. To talk and joke with her. He was the only boss she’d ever had that let her forget she was a woman in a man’s workplace. For that, she was grateful and held a soft spot for him.
He frowned when she got closer and cast a glance at the work crews assembled. “What’s the status?” he asked. “Is it bad?”
Laurel shook her head. “I don’t know. Blue Bear Search and Rescue went in about twenty minutes ago. No word yet on whether they’ve spotted them or details regarding the extraction.”
