When the doctor got back from his quick trip down Memory Lane, he squeezed her hand and said, “I’m really happy that I got to be the one to give you this news, Julianna.” His smile indicated that he might be feeling like he had just delivered the most wonderful news under the sun—which he had, but it was a complicated piece of news if there ever was one.
“Got to get back to my rounds,” he announced. “But I’ll have the nurse call your family and let them know you’re awake.”
Julianna asked Nurse Winfield to call Virginia and give her the message to come with Mother and Cassie. She wanted to see them at the same time. The idea of triple support was soothing; and besides, she was weeks away from a full recovery from the pneumonia and too tired to make multiple announcements of her news.
“It’s a blessing for sure!” Cassie exclaimed, clapping her hands together. “Bible says the Lord’s close to the brokenhearted—and look, He’s given you a reason to go on, praise be.”
“Cassie’s right,” her mother said, delighted after the surprise settled. She fanned her glowing face. “Tell me—when am I going to be a grandmother?”
“In April,” Julianna said.
Her mother didn’t catch the emphasis put on the month, but Cassie did, looking at Julianna while she silently counted back the months. With each month she passed, her eyes grew wider.
“The baby’s father!” Her hand flew to her heart. “Heaven help—it could be either one of them.”
Julianna looked from Cassie to Virginia to her mother, the three people she was closest to. Quietly, she said, “Actually, it could only be one of them.”
Perplexed, Cassie cocked her head. “Come again, child?”
“Leyton and I—” Julianna drew a breath, still wheezy from pneumonia. “Leyton and I . . . never consummated our marriage.”
The next sound Julianna heard was a clatter as her mother collapsed against the tray of Julianna’s dirty lunch plates.
“Mother!”
“Here now,” Cassie said, offering a chair. “Collect yourself.”
Seated and forgetting propriety, Julianna’s mother gulped water straight from the pitcher on the nightstand. “We have serious trouble if what you say is true,” she said, words barely audible.
“It’s true,” Julianna affirmed. “Leyton and I are married in name only. Surely you didn’t think I’d be interested in—”
“Of course not,” her mother said, voice louder but cracking. “I just feared . . . well, I thought Leyton would insist.”
Julianna and Virginia shared a quick smile. Virginia, who had known for a while that the marriage lacked intimacy, said, “Leyton thinks he’s denying Julianna marital relations—and that she’s bothered by it.”
The women giggled for a minute, then Cassie said, “I’m glad he keeps them paws off you, but it sure makes for a problem. What you gonna do, Julianna? The man is gonna know he didn’t father your baby.”
“I think I can handle Leyton,” Julianna said.
“Can handle Leyton?” Virginia cried. “Your handling of Leyton is what got you thrown into the rain and plunked half dead into the hospital.”
The harsh tone stung Julianna, but she saw Virginia’s face immediately collapse with regret. She could only imagine what her best friend was thinking and fearing, though, and what prompted the outburst—that Julianna was naïve, needed to be woken up, and was no match for the likes of Satan Drakeworth.
“I’m sorry, sweets,” Virginia said. “It’s just that you have to be careful how you reckon with a man like that.”
“Virginia’s right,” her mother agreed. “He has to be feared.”
“I’ll never again fear him,” Julianna vowed, her face tightening. “I’ll reckon with him however I need to, but I won’t fear him. I made up my mind about that before we even got married.” Her eyes blazed as she looked at the three women. “He’s already hurt me beyond belief—there isn’t much else he can do to me.”
“Except try to take your baby!” her mother insisted. “If he tells your father that this child belongs to . . . oh my . . .” She hugged herself and shuddered.
“What do you think they’ll want to do?” Cassie asked, sounding fearful that she already knew the answer.
“You know what they’ll want to do,” Julianna’s mother practically whined. “To them, Jace McAllister is nothing but a despicable bank robber.” She gestured toward Julianna’s stomach. “Julianna is carrying the man’s child.” She looked around the room, as if to make sure that no one was hiding behind the curtains or under the sink. Voice lowered, she said, “There are doctors who can end a pregnancy.”
Cassie swallowed hard and winced. “To think that Mr. Richard wouldn’t want his own grandbaby born . . .”
“They’d knock Julianna out cold if that’s what it took to get her to a doctor whose price had been met,” her mother said. Nervous, she broke one of her steadfast rules and nibbled a fingernail. “I suppose we could hide Julianna’s condition until it was too late, but then they’d hand the child off for adoption and tell the town it was a stillbirth—”
“Neither of those things is going to happen.” Julianna was adamant, her face flushed and her breath rapid. “I’ve spent years thinking I could never have a baby, only to find out that I can. No one—I assure you—no one is going to take Jace’s child away from me. I’ve lost too much of him already; I’ve lost too much of everything.”
Virginia squeezed her hand. “Shhhhh, honey, you’re heading for a real tizzy fit.”
Julianna nodded as she exploded into a coughing fit. She gagged and quaked nearly to the point of convulsions. She waved off the women’s attempts to give her water or run for a nurse, waiting instead for the onslaught to subside. When it did, she flopped her head back on the pillow and took long gulps of air.
Her mother fussed over her, pushing the damp hair off her face and straightening her bedcover. “Oh, darling, you’re still so ill. We’ll talk about this when you’re stronger.”
“No, I want to talk now,” Julianna said with a quiver. “Just let me catch my breath.”
When she was able to speak without coughing, her words shocked the other women. “The solution isn’t that complicated.”
“What?” The other three spoke in unison, the disbelief in their voices matching the expressions on their faces.
“Father doesn’t oversee my life anymore,” she said. “My marriage certificate changed that, making Leyton the only one who must agree not to stand in the way of me having this baby.”
“Oh, sweets, you make that sound like a walk in the park,” Virginia said. “Satan will never accept this.”
Cassie studied Julianna with a clever eye. “That devil will accept anything if the price is right. What’s going on in that mind of yours?”
“My trust fund,” Julianna answered.
“Oh, Julianna, not that!” Virginia cried, hands flying to her face. “You might need that money to escape someday.”
“It’s all I’ve got to bargain with.”
Her mother jumped in. “But, darling, my parents set up that fund for you. They never intended that it be used for something like this.”
“Considering the circumstances, I can’t think of a better use for that money.”
“Well, yes, I suppose . . .” Her mother fidgeted in her seat. “But you don’t even come into your trust until your twenty-fifth birthday, and that’s three years away.”
“We can draw up the papers now,” she answered. “I’ll relinquish my trust, state that it goes to Leyton when I turn twenty-five. You know it’s an offer he can’t refuse.”
She fell quiet for a minute and then continued. “In most cases, this is too much to ask of any man. Leyton isn’t married to me for the right reasons, though, and he’s getting what he wants. The banks, the wealth, the security—and now, all of my trust fund, which is nothing to scoff at. Letting me have the child I’ve always wanted is a fair trade.”
“Say Leyton does agree,�
� Cassie said, “then what? You want him actin’ to your daddy like he’s the baby’s father?”
Julianna gave her head a quick shake. “Let the world assume what it will, but as far as Father goes, no lies.”
As soon as the words were out, Julianna saw her mother tremble, an indicator that she had major concerns about this being the right way to go. “Mother? What are you thinking?”
“What I’m thinking is . . . oh dear, I don’t like what I’m thinking,” her mother said. “I know deceit is a tangled web and the truth always comes out anyway, but scheming just feels so much safer this time.” Suddenly, though, her eyes lit as if a brilliant idea had just popped into her mind. “Maybe we can find a way to blackmail Leyton. Oh, darling, it shouldn’t be hard to do.” Then as quickly as her eyes had brightened, they went dull, and her head slumped. “Oh, I’m being wicked, so wicked, thinking such thoughts, but your father isn’t going to like this, Julianna. He’s not going to like this one bit.”
Julianna, seeing her mother’s fear, calmly tried to explain. “Father will have suspicions because of the timing. When he voices them, he must be told the truth. There’s nothing he can do about it anyway.”
“But he’s going to be furious,” her mother said.
“He’ll be more furious if he finds out later that he’s been lied to. When Leyton gets his hands on my trust fund, he’ll have nothing to lose by telling father the truth—and he’ll make it sound as though he, too, was deceived.”
Virginia rolled her eyes and launched into an imitation of Leyton. “I can’t tell you, sir, how this news disturbs my heart. To learn that my precious child is . . . well, sir, I can’t even bear to say the horrible words . . .”
Laughter fluttered among the women, easing some of the tension. When the laughter passed, Julianna continued. “Even if Leyton never tells Father, he’d hold his knowledge over my head.” She shivered and pulled the bedcover around her. “Imagine the power that would give him, the threats he could make.”
Cassie leaned down and kissed Julianna’s forehead. “You’re a wise girl, you are. The truth is best, always. If you paid Leyton to lie, you’d be starting an ugly chain of untruths.”
Cassie’s hand was resting on Julianna’s shoulder. Julianna patted it, thanking Cassie for believing in her decision. Eyes still on her mother, though, she tried to be reassuring. “Mother, Father is enamored with Leyton. He thinks of him as a son more than he’s ever thought of me as a daughter. If anyone can convince Father of this child’s importance, it’s Leyton.”
“Yes, but do you think Leyton will do that for you?”
“For me?” Julianna pointed at herself. “Never. But for my trust fund?” She looked around at the three women, then laughed. “In a heartbeat.”
It was late that night when Julianna was finally alone with her child. The hallway was empty of visitors’ footsteps and the nurses had settled into a quiet routine.
Her whole being was tight with tears, and she couldn’t help dwelling on how bittersweet her situation was. When she squeezed her eyes shut, it seemed to pull both a bit of grief and a bit of joy from her core, expressing itself as hot tears that spilled over and rolled down her cheeks.
A reason to go on, she thought, though she was quick to follow with a hollow reminder. But I must go on alone.
She wondered if Meredith had felt this way, so long ago when she learned that Jace was within her, though his father had been taken by the sea. So richly blessed with gain, yet sorely hurt from loss, elation and despair tightly entwined like thick vines.
Smiling through her tears and placing her hands on her stomach, Julianna wondered when she and Jace had defied the doctors, making this baby despite the slim chances. Was it their final night on Ambrose Point, the night she had sat on the sand-dusted porch and wished for a child?
A gentle certainty settled upon her, and she knew that was the night it had happened. In her heart, she was peacefully sure of it, sure that a prayerful wish in the wind had quietly come to pass.
Funny, but yesterday she didn’t know this child existed. Today, she could not imagine her life without it.
“They say I’m your source of life,” she whispered, “but somehow, I think it’s the other way around.”
Sheriff Tucker Moll was curt.
“I’m doing all right.” He made no inquiry as to Julianna’s well-being.
“I was hoping you would be. I’m . . . I’m sorry I wasn’t able to get in touch sooner,” she said from the other end of the phone line. Tucker detected that she sounded nervous, and he knew his voice could be intimidating when it turned rigid like it was now. That was too bad, though. He just couldn’t be the big helpful sheriff he’d been to her in the past. And boy, had he ever been helpful, just to have her throw it back in his face. And what she had done—was doing—to Jace? It tore him to pieces just thinking about that.
“I know there are things I need to take care of—” she said.
“Things to take care of?” he cut in. “Like what?”
“Well, the house . . .”
“It’s all boarded up, ma’am. Did it myself since we never heard from you.” He switched ears. “I don’t know how you’ll need to handle it, but I’m sure a lawyer could tell you.”
“A lawyer?”
“That’d be my advice,” he said. Lord, he was tired, wanted his supper, and ranked this as the last conversation in the world he wanted to be having at that moment. “Ma’am, I’m gonna need to go.”
“I appreciate you seeing to the house,” Julianna said. “Um, just one more thing . . .”
“The reward money? It’s in the bank, just like Jace set it up to be,” he said, making no attempt to hide the irritation that was prickling his nerves. “There’s money from the tour boats, too, in case you’re wondering.”
“I was actually wondering about the gravesite.”
“It’s by the sea, like you and I talked about that day in the hotel.”
“Good,” she said. “I know Jace would approve of the location, near his mother and grandfather.”
“We did everything by the book,” he continued, referring to the plan laid out by the FBI. “Funeral, burial, headstone . . . exactly as we were supposed to.”
“It sounds like you took care of everything,” she said quietly. “I really thank you for that, Sheriff Moll.”
“You’re welcome. Now, ma’am, I really need to get off the line,” he said and then made it official by hanging up.
Now with that over, Tucker sat at his desk, stared at the phone, and struggled to accept that Julianna had clearly decided that money was better than love. He hadn’t wanted to feel the way he did, had vowed to give Julianna a chance to prove herself. Well, too many days and nights had slipped by. Too many, and now it was too late.
Waiting so long to call here, he thought as a scowl crept across his weathered face. And then caring only about the house, while Jace sits in some prison cell, his bed a thin mattress on a cement slab nailed to the wall.
Tucker tossed a butterscotch into his mouth and strode to the front window of the sheriff’s office. The December wind had kicked up, and sand was strewn everywhere, on the streets and sidewalks, the benches and porch steps. The town was sleepy this time of year, what with the summer folks off having Christmas in their mansions and big cities.
Out of habit, his eyes made a quick scan of the dark street. Not much was doing, but then, it never really was. Excepting, no doubt, the big drama of Jace McAllister, but that was over and done with now, though people still liked to talk about it.
Looking out on the lazy, windblown streets, Tucker thought of Jace, pounding his skull against the cold steel of prison bars, the lonely echo some kind of symbol of the hollow turn his life had taken.
The news of Julianna’s wedding to Leyton had not left Jace cold, not like Tucker had thought it would. Maybe it was the only way she could keep herself and their secret safe, but as the days stretched into months and no explanation came, he’d
told Tucker in a letter that he felt ready to explode.
“What am I supposed to think?” he had written. “I want to believe in her, but the longer this goes on, the more I start thinking things I don’t want to think. Maybe I should contact her, but what if Leyton finds out I’m alive, and then Lightfoot gets the word? They’ll kill me, and then I’ll never be able to help Julianna. Or worse, Lightfoot will get to me by killing her . . .”
Still, he wanted Tucker to send any news he could, and Tucker had sworn that he would.
There hadn’t been anything since the wedding write-up in the paper, until today, and it wasn’t just the phone call. Tucker returned to his desk and grabbed the society section of the paper, the same section he had looked at earlier today before rolling it up and slamming the back of chair with it. There she was, Julianna standing next to Sneer Face himself, the two of them all dressed up and in the company of others gathered around a Christmas Tree, everyone holding champagne glasses like a bunch of festive richies having themselves one dandy of a good time.
Members of the Sweet Creek Country Club gather for the Annual Christmas Gala . . .
Yes, Julianna was clearly going about life in a world far away from Ambrose Point.
Stung by Sheriff Moll’s cold reception and abrupt disconnection, Julianna put the receiver back in the cradle of the phone booth. She had left the house to place the call, not wanting to have to explain to Leyton charges to Ambrose Point on their phone bill.
Driving home, she replayed the cold voice from across the miles and found it hard to believe it belonged to the candy-popping sheriff who had once been so nice to her. She knew there could only be one explanation. He blames me for Jace’s death.
How her heart had ached when the sheriff spoke of handling Jace’s final matters. She should have been the one taking care of those things, but Leyton had made that impossible, had denied her that one last privilege. She wished, too, that she hadn’t waited so long to call the sheriff and talk about such things. Perhaps he wasn’t happy with her about that, either. Maybe if she’d had a chance to explain what had been going on these past few months . . . but then again, if he really held her responsible for Jace’s death, would anything else matter?
Seeking the Shore Page 5
