by Zara Zenia
“I’m not nervous,” I protest. “It’s just…college life that’s all.”
“What about it?” Eva looks confused.
It’s then that I really realize just how skewed our perceptions of life really are against each other. We have nothing in common when it comes to lifestyle, but inside, we can understand each other on a deeper level.
“There’s nothing going on,” I repeat. My ultimate goal is to reassure my sister that I’m fine before I board the ship back to Earth and disappear from her life once more. “College life can be stressful sometimes. I promise you though, it’s just nervous jitters about the trip home.” I give her a feeble attempt at a smile.
“If you’re sure.” Eva’s expression gives her away. She’s less than convinced.
I reel her in for another hug. “I have to go now,” I say in a muffled voice against her shirt. “But I’ll see you again soon.”
“Don’t be a stranger,” Eva states and I notice that now, her eyes look sad.
“I won’t,” I say and swallow hard. I stare up at the ceiling so that the hot tears forming in my eyes won’t slide down my cheeks.
I board the ship and mentally curse myself for forgetting my blanket out of my suitcase, which has already been placed in cargo. These damn vessels are always like a frigid ice box, but maybe the flight attendant can get me a blanket to borrow.
It doesn’t matter anyway, I’m too nervous to sleep now. I glance out the window after sliding into my seat and strapping on all of my gear for the trip. Eva is standing by the window, waving at me with an apprehensive expression.
I give her a shaky wave in response, knowing that it’s undeniable that she can feel my anxiety as it slices through the air between us. I may live millions of miles away, but Eva is planted in my heart. She’s my sister, and I need her now more than ever.
As the ship undocks and we prepare for the climb away from Desergan, I can only hope that my dreams won’t entail another unconscious visit to the red and yellow planet that haunts my vision and creeps through my brain when I least expect it. That’s the thing about nightmares. Sometimes, you don’t even know if it’s real or just your mind playing tricks on you.
Chapter Three
Katie
It’s Monday afternoon, and I’m dragging along, exhausted and ready to wind down for the evening. I always feel somewhat jetlagged after a long trip, but adding in all day classes and I’m ready to hit my pillow like a sack of bricks. I shuffle through the hordes of people walking through campus.
I hear the mindless chatter and the laughter of friendly conversations bursting through my ears, but I feel more like a walking zombie than a spectacular piece to the puzzle that comes from being a college student.
Luckily, I get to live by myself in my dorm room. My prior roommate’s name was Sally. Sally was plump and full of energy, but she got severely sick about halfway through last semester and had to go home.
One day, I came back to the room we shared to find her father packing up her things. When I asked him where Sally was, and when she was coming back, he gave me a hurried answer. Something about Sally missing home, and that her health was declining. She was going to finish up the year at a local community college where they lived.
I remember feeling disappointed at the time, and how I’d get lonely without a companion to vent and dish to. Now, I am used to the silence. The quiet doesn’t fill the void of loneliness all the time, but I appreciate the fact that not many students are fortunate enough to have the choice to live alone.
My keys rattle as I unlatch the deadbolt to my room. I walk inside to the familiar smells of lavender and honey, my favorite scents in the world. I drop my bookbag in a heap on the floor and toss my keys on the little kitchen dinette in the left corner of the room.
I can hear the faint muffled sound of voices every so often as people walk past the closed door to my room. I flick on the TV and plop down on my bed, but I’m distracted. I don’t feel like becoming a vegetable tonight and zonking out in front of a movie.
Standing up, I give my arms and legs a hearty stretch and pluck my half gallon bottle of milk from the fridge, drinking it straight from the container. I live by myself. There’s nobody to share with, and no point in dirtying a glass.
I feel my phone buzz in my back pocket. I retrieve it and groan as I sit back down on the edge of my bed. Annoyance fills me, even though I have an immediate rush of guilt for my reaction to the text.
It’s my mother, asking me about my day, whether I made it home safely from my visit to Desergan and if I want to have dinner with her.
Hey Mom, I’m back. All is well. I’m not feeling great tonight. I think I might just stay in and study.
Staring at the message, I debate about sending it right away or waiting a few minutes. If my mom thinks I’m just sitting in my dorm room staring at my phone, she might want to come to my ‘rescue’. That’s the thing about my mom. She’s hypocritical. She wants people to think that she’s some philanthropist who likes to fix people, but she doesn’t realize that she’s part of the reason things get stirred up in the first place.
I take a deep breath and hit send, hoping she won’t antagonize me too much and will just leave me alone. I pull out my physics book. I have a test next week, but I’ll need to start studying for it now if I want to hold on to any remote possibility of passing the exam.
Sitting down at my small table desk, I stare out the window that overlooks a quaint little courtyard in the center of my building. I’m a people watcher and find myself slipping into the realm of distraction instead of zoning into focus on my work.
I’m grateful to be rebuilding my relationship with my beloved sister. I still cringe when I think about the ways I hurt her, including not believing in her. Eva is the kind of person to forgive and forget, so I’m incredibly grateful that she’s allowing me to purge my past and reenter her life.
The closer I get to her, the further away I drift from my mother. My eyes are finally opening to the ways in which my mother selfishly put her own needs and wishes in front of her daughters’ after our father died.
My phone chimes on the table beside me. I am so absorbed and lost in my thoughts that it startles me. I jump a few inches in the air and hit my knee on the side of the table. Wincing, I take a few deep breaths and clutch the wounded area before seeing my mother’s response.
Okay, fine. I miss you though. We need to talk soon.
Talk about what? Dread instantly cripples me. I don’t want to have dinner with my mother, much less a serious conversation. I know I will have to respond to her because if I don’t, she’ll never leave me alone.
Okay Mom, I’ll try to find time to get together. I’m going to bed soon.
I hit the send button and turn my phone off. I’m not exactly lying to my mother. It is getting late, and I have early classes again in the morning. Frustrated and getting nowhere, I slam my physics book shut and toss it on the floor. I’m not going to get any work done tonight, I might as well realize that now before I waste any more brain power that I don’t feel like I have the liberty to just dispose of at random.
I walk to the fridge again and open it, staring inside blankly. There’s nothing here, but I know I’ll need to eat something. I clutch my grumbling belly and glance over at the clock on my bedside table.
The red numbers on the display read six o’clock. I grab my wallet and keys and trek down to the common room in the building. When I get there, I notice two girls I recognize from history class.
“Hi,” I say and wave to them. I’ve seen them around the building, but I’m not sure what their names are.
“Hi,” the one with black, curly hair stands up and gives me a warm smile. “You’re Katie, right?”
“Yes.” I nod and blush as humiliation threatens to shame me. I instantly feel guilty for not knowing her name.
“I’m Samantha and this is Bridgett,” the curly haired one states. “We have history together.”
“Right,” I say and point w
ith a nod and a chuckle. “History. What a drag, eh?”
My pathetic attempt at a joke somehow flourishes and the two girls erupt into laughter. “Tell me about it.” Bridgett rolls her eyes. “I have to pinch myself to keep from falling asleep through the professor’s lectures.”
I push my quarters into the vending machine and punch in the numbers to get a Snickers Bar and a Diet Coke. As soon as they collapse into the little exit container, I pull them out and turn around, smiling at the girls.
“Well, if you’ll excuse me, it’s dinner time.” I hold up my snacks and aim for another joke which to my surprise is even more well received than the first one.
“That’s funny.” Samantha nods as if she totally understands where I’m coming from.
“Have a good night,” Bridgett calls behind me as I cast them both a shy wave.
That exchange of friendly and approachable banter will be just the boost I’ll need in order to get through the rest of the night. I walk back to my dorm with my snacks, feeling a slight pep in my step.
I know that later when the night settles in its blanket over the city, I’ll have to inevitably battle my insomnia. I won’t get much sleep tonight, but I’ll damn sure try my hardest.
Chapter Four
Katie
The next morning, I grab my backpack and sling it over my shoulder. It’s time to center myself, get focused and go to back to back lecture classes. I feel like I’m stuck in a rut of monotony. Everything is always the same, and I don’t feel like my life has that thrilling aspect that other people enjoy.
I’m not sure it bothers me though, because I don’t exactly like to live on the edge. I just wish that the plaguing feeling being viewed as ordinary all the time wasn’t a constant worry for me. My level of self-confidence is questionable, but it’s always been that way.
Stepping out of my dorm room, I watch as other sleepy students buzz past me, shuffling along. Most of them are bleary eyed and daydreaming of when they can go back to bed or have a cocktail with their buddies. I yawn and begin walking down the stairs because my door room is only on the second floor.
My dorm building is co-ed, which normally doesn’t bother me, but today the hair on the back of my neck prickles as I walk down the stairs. A nervous energy churns in my stomach as I pick up my stride, descending now two steps at a time. I hold onto the railing as I leap, making sure there is a safe distance between me and the two guys I’m sure are following me.
I’ve seen them around campus before, and they always give me an unsettled feeling as if they are studying me like a piece of prey to hunt. My senses tinkle with a fresh batch of unwanted, but very real, anxiety. There’s something about them that’s cold and dark and brooding. I don’t know much about them other than the fact that they are brothers.
The worst part is that I also know they are vampires, newly turned. Vampires went public around the same time Tylor and the dragons from Desergan made their presence known to our world. I guess they figured that if the world could handle Alien Dragons, they could handle Vampires too. As for the two following me, I don’t know their names, but as I traipse through the hordes of students walking to their respective classes, my heart pounds. The guys are trailing me. I’m not able to widen the gap between us as easily as I want.
I mentally wonder if I’ll even be able to make it to class without them approaching me. I shudder at the thought, not because they aren’t handsome, but because I’m afraid of vampires and always have been, even before I knew they really existed, I was afraid of them.
This also isn’t the first time I’ve noticed them following me to class. They are transfer students, but I don’t know where they came from before enrolling at NYU. I’m curious about them, but not enough to befriend them. I want to keep my safe distance.
I wonder if they are able to get inside of people’s minds and cause them to have nightmares. Are they the reason I can’t sleep at night? My battle with insomnia is becoming stronger by the day.
I can’t really explain what happens to me in the middle of the night. I usually wake up in a cold sweat. I can always hear my pulse swishing through my ears. The room always feels dense and eerie. The shadows bounce on the walls and make me tremble as if I’m a tiny child afraid of monsters coming alive from underneath the bed.
I dare a glance over my shoulder. The brothers are pretending to not be paying attention to me, but every so often I see their gaze flick back to me. This is how I know they are bee-lining in on me for some unknown reason. They aren’t paying attention to anything else happening around them. It’s as if they are unaffected or undistracted by their surroundings and all they can see is me.
Usually, their stares and trail are far subtler than it is today. I instantly get a nervous feeling come over me, the same kind that I feel in the night when there’s nobody around but the insanity of my wild imagination.
Am I just overreacting? It’s not as if they could get away with just pouncing on me and draining my blood right here in the middle of the campus. They have rules and regulations to follow, just like any other vampire currently roaming the Earth.
They are definitely strange, but in an intense way. I know they are newly turned vampires because their eye color is still regular. Both of them have dark hair, almost the color of midnight without a moon. Their eyes are a piercing blue. After five years, their eyes will shift to the trademark steel gray that I find interesting and chilling at the same time.
I’m frustrated as I spin on a heel to turn the corner and walk to my Human Studies class. I don’t know where the bubbling anger is coming from, but it’s brewing inside of me. Maybe I have a more acute sense of bravery after spending the weekend with my sister Eva. Traveling to a different planet alone gives me a sense of pride and that I can conquer things that otherwise might make me frightened. I know I still need to work on boosting my self-assurance, and I think of the perfect way to remedy that on the spot.
I halt in my tracks, spinning around to glare at the two of them. I fold my hands defensively across my chest. My heart is pounding, but I try not to allow these guys to find a crack in the sturdy foundation I’m aiming to radiate.
This little gesture is profoundly out of character for me. Normally, if I encounter a vampire I’ll try to walk the other way, knowing that I should not get involved. I know that they are only after one thing, and that’s my blood. They are after everyone’s blood, it’s not just mine. I know I’m not any more special than everybody else. As a human though, I’m vulnerable and exposed when it comes to walking in the presence of a vampire.
I get cold feet as I stumble to form a sentence. The guys are rapidly approaching me, and their eyes are narrowing in on mine. They are grinning with charm, which makes me equally suspicious and relieved at once.
I hear the words of Eva’s friends, Lucas and Morgan ringing through my ears like a fog horn. They are the oldest vampires I know, and the wisest.
Vampires only want one thing. Their voices whirl through my mind. Blood.
These two brothers look hungry as they slide closer to me. I’m in the hallway, surrounded by people…witnesses. I’m safe, or at least that’s what I can keep reassuring to myself.
I swallow hard. My senses are as sharp as daggers, but I know these vampires will be able to sniff out my fear. I don’t want to be the hunted. I need to learn how to stick up for myself and protect myself at any cost. Any warnings I had ever heard about vampires would have to be stifled for now. Operation stick up for myself is going to begin today.
Chapter Five
Carl
The blonde haired, blue eyed girl that Roger and I are following is beautiful, but it’s not her looks that have me reeling. She’s intoxicating and breathtaking sure, but it’s what’s underneath that counts to me. It’s her blood that I need, that I long for and thirst to gulp down by the gallon. I know it’s a hopeless dream. I know I have to fight off this battling hunger and thirst that I can’t quench.
I lick my lips and try
not to drool over how fresh and perfect I imagine her blood to taste. I’m sure it’s a ripe, delicious flavor that would undoubtedly make my insides ripple. Flicking my gaze over to my brother Roger, he immediately shifts his eyes downcast.
He’s the quiet one. If anybody is going to have the nerve to talk to this girl, it’s going to be me. That doesn’t mean that’s necessarily a good thing. I’m a train wreck when it comes to being anxious and jittery all the time. I’m always wired and fraying at the seams. However, talking to her is something we have to do. It’s important.
I’m twenty-two, just like Roger, but I’ve been a vampire for three years longer than he has. Roger is still trying to adapt to having the piqued and heightened senses that come along with the territory of entering the eternal world where all the senses you once knew are now magnified by a million.
He’s coming into his own, and I’m doing my best to teach him along the way. Although, I still have worlds of information to learn myself about the role of being a vampire. The one intense knowledge I live with is the fact that I’m thirsty all the time. I crave human blood and I’m surrounded by it. There is so much to drink, swirling through human veins around me and taunting me. My thirst is never quenched because I can’t act on my natural instincts in a place like this. There’s blood everywhere, but not a drop to drink.
I run a nervous and shaky hand through my hair. The girl turns around and glares at us as if she’s getting ready to start spewing hate spells out of her mouth. I don’t know what to expect, but as I glance over at shy Roger, he’s shaking his head fervently. I know what he’s trying to do. He wants me to keep walking and ignore a confrontation.
He doesn’t want me to take her bait, and he keeps his stride even though I halt to stand beside the girl. I know her name is Katie Steele, and I know she smells delicious.
