I glance in the direction of the kitchen. “Yeah. The tiles seem level to me, but I’m sure you’ll want to check for yourself.”
He nods. “Absolutely.” Then he walks into the kitchen and spends several minutes inspecting the work they did. “Looks good.” He turns to me. “Thanks for being here all day. I hope you were able to do your work.”
“Yeah, it was fine.” I smile to show that I’m just his assistant—nothing more. “I’m glad I was able to help you out, Mr. Drake.”
He frowns, but doesn’t comment on the way I addressed him.
“How did your meeting go?” I ask.
“They signed with us.”
“That’s great.” I stare at him a moment. “Well, I’d better go. You probably have work to do.” He doesn’t reply, so I turn to go.
“Ashley, wait.”
I turn around and look at him. “Yes, Mr. Drake?”
Irritation flashes in his eyes. “Enough with the Mr. Drake. We’re not at the office now. You can stop pretending.”
DRAKE
Seeing Ashley standing in my home does interesting things to my heart, and I find I want her more than ever. My meeting with the new client had gone well, but at times I’d found my mind wandering to this place—my home—where I knew Ashley was working. I’d even caught an earlier flight back, hopeful that I’d get home before she left.
Looks like I made it just in time.
Now, as I look at her—and hear her call me Mr. Drake—I can’t deny my attraction any longer.
It’s time to let her know what I want.
Twenty-One
ASHLEY
My heart pounds as I gaze into his face. What does he mean about stopping pretending? “I don’t understand.”
He walks towards me, but stops when he’s three feet away. “When no one else is around you don’t have to pretend like we don’t know each other.”
“Oh.” My gaze goes to the floor. He doesn’t want anyone to know that he knows me outside of work. As much as that makes sense, it still stings.
His finger touches my chin, and when my eyes meet his, electricity charges through my body. Frank desire clouds his eyes and a surge of heat rushes to my core. All thoughts of Rachel and Patrice flee my mind, and the only thing I’m conscious of is Drake standing in front of me. Just the two of us. No distractions, no limitations.
As we gaze at one another, I can see him warring with himself, and to be honest, I’m not sure what I want him to do. I don’t want to jeopardize my job, but I want him so much that I ache.
My lips part, and his hand moves to my face, stroking the skin on my cheek. His touch leaves a trail of fire and my breathing becomes shallow.
“I’m sorry about what I said yesterday,” he says in a soft voice, never taking his eyes from mine. “It’s not my place to tell you how to live your life.”
“I didn’t sleep with him,” I blurt, then my face reddens. As a way to avoid meeting his eyes, I turn to the side and set my laptop bag on the floor.
“Oh?”
I straighten and face him, then shake my head.
“He looked pretty comfortable with you when you were dancing.”
I remember the look of anger on Drake’s face when his gaze had gone to Jonathan’s arms wrapped around me, and I speak without thinking. “I was pretending they were your arms.”
His eyebrows shoot up in obvious surprise, and my eyes go round with chagrin. Why did I just admit that to him? Am I insane? He’s going to fire me. He told me to forget about what happened at the cabin. I so obviously have not. Stupid, Ash. So stupid.
A lazy smile forms on his mouth. “Is that so?”
Hesitant now to admit my feelings, I give a slight nod.
“Say it,” he demands, his eyes glowing with desire. “Say it out loud.”
I’m not sure what he’s asking, so I say the first thing that comes to mind. “I wanted it to be your arms around me. I wanted it to be you holding me close.”
His nostrils flare and he roughly drags me against him. “Like this?” he asks in my ear, his voice hoarse.
“Yes,” I whisper as my body responds of its own accord. Heat surges through me and I don’t want him to stop—to hell with the job.
One of his hands moves to the back of my neck, and he pulls away enough so that our eyes meet, then he devours my lips with his. This is nothing like the kiss Jonathan gave me. This kiss is animalistic, hungry, powerful—and I love it. My arms go around his neck and I never want to let go.
My breathing is shallow and I’m in heaven. I’ve wanted this ever since I walked into his office and saw him sitting behind his desk in his tailored suit, looking so in control, looking so powerful, looking so hot. Who am I kidding? I’ve wanted this since I left his cabin nearly two weeks before.
With his mouth still pressed to mine, he scoops me up, and he carries me into his bedroom.
I’m lost to him. He owns me—fully and completely. There is no going back. There is no other man that makes me feel the way he does. I want to weep because I don’t think he feels the same way about me and I can’t abide the thought of losing him. Even a hint of that outcome makes my heart ache with devastation. I want to tell him that I love him, but I hold back because I’m certain that will scare him away.
Twenty-Two
ASHLEY
Later, as Drake holds me against him, I revel in his closeness, because deep inside I know it won’t last. It can’t. He’s told me he only wants me for fun, for a good time. Not for real life. While we were at his cabin he told me that I was like a respite from his real life, a way to relax and let go. That doesn’t sound like a recipe for a long-term relationship, but I can’t endure the thought of not having him in my life.
I get the impression that as much as he wants to resist me, he just can’t stay away. The thought worries me, because this draw he has towards me doesn’t seem to equate with having a relationship, not when he says I’m not “real life”.
Does his attraction mean I will no longer have a job? If that’s the case, and if I no longer work for him, then I’ll no longer see him. Which means he’ll no longer see me. Which means he’ll be able to forget me—out of sight, out of mind—and I’ll lose him forever.
Wanting to forestall the inevitable, I push myself off of the bed and quickly dress. “I’d better get going.”
He leans on his elbow as he watches me. “Already?”
“I have to work tomorrow,” I say. “And so do you.”
“Hmm,” is all he says. Then he sits up.
Having no idea what that “Hmm” means, I stand frozen in place as I wait for my world to crumble, wait for him to tell me that I can no longer work for him.
He pats the bed next to him, and in a serious tone of voice says, “Let’s talk.”
Cautiously, like he’s a wild animal with the potential to rip my throat out, I approach the bed, then sit where he directed.
DRAKE
I look at her, then smile softly. “As I’ve so aptly demonstrated this afternoon, Ashley, I’m very attracted to you.”
That’s an understatement.
She doesn’t respond, and I know she must realize that this will never work—either she can’t work for me, or we can no longer have these interludes. To be honest, I’m not sure which I prefer. I’d thought I could keep her at arms length as my assistant, but obviously that was a fairly tale. But I’m nowhere near ready to get into any kind of relationship with her—or anyone. My job takes too much of my time. That’s where I want to spend my energy, not trying to make someone else happy. Still, I do enjoy these private times with Ashley.
I know that makes me selfish, but that doesn’t change how I feel.
I draw in a breath, then say, “I thought I could work with you everyday and keep my attraction under control. But when I saw you at the dance club the other night, and saw that guy’s hands all over you . . .” I look away and my jaw tightens at the memory, then I meet her gaze. “It was all I could do to ke
ep from walking over to you and ripping his hands off.”
So you don’t want to have a relationship with her, but you don’t want her to be with anyone else? Nice, Drake.
With a frown, I look at her.
ASHLEY
I think about that night at the dance club. I’d been able to tell from Drake’s face that he’d been bothered by the way Jonathan had acted so possessive with me, but I hadn’t realized how strong his reaction had been. He must care about me. A smile begins to curve my mouth.
Then his other words sink in. What did he say about working with me everyday and keeping his attraction under control? What does he mean? “Wait,” I say as fresh worry blossoms within me. “What are you saying? Are you firing me?”
He sighs. “To be honest, I don’t know.”
Panic engulfs me. I can’t let him fire me. I’ve already considered the consequences—if he no longer sees me everyday, he’ll be able to move on without me and I’ll never see him again. “Please don’t fire me, Drake. Please.” If I wasn’t so desperate to keep this job, I’d be embarrassed by my pleading.
His eyebrows draw together. “It’s just not right. I can’t be sleeping with one of my employees.” He frowns. “I’m sorry, Ashley. I made a mistake.” He runs his finger through his hair, then looks me in the eye. “This is all my fault. I should have known better than to hire you in the first place.”
Twenty-Three
ASHLEY
“What?” He’s about to fire me, I can tell. “No, Drake.” Tears are pushing into my eyes, but I take a deep breath and manage to hold them back, then I pretend to be calm as I utter my next words. “Tell me this. If I don’t work for you, will you go out with me?”
He’s quiet for a moment, then he finally says, “I don’t know. Maybe. Like I told you before, I date lots of women.”
“So it’s possible we could date?” Elated by the thought, I reconsider my determination to continue working for him.
DRAKE
I gaze at her, my eyebrows pulling together. “What are you thinking?”
I know what I’m thinking. I’m not interested in that kind of relationship. As much as I’ve grown to care for Ashley—and I’ve grown to care for her more than I’d like to admit—I’m not ready to make any kind of commitment. Not even close. I’m not even sure I want to promise that we’d date.
I told her I date lots of women—and that’s true. At least when I have time to date. But I don’t want to get her hopes up that there could be more between us than we have now.
ASHLEY
Should I admit it? Should I tell him how I feel? I smile, ready to confess my love for him, but his next words stop me.
“Let’s get one thing straight, Ashley. I’m not looking for a relationship. Yes, Rachel and I are done, but I enjoy dating multiple women. I’ve never made that a secret with you.”
I frown, his statement upsetting me. “Now who gets around?”
He laughs. “I didn’t say I slept with all of them.”
Oh. Suddenly I’m glad I didn’t reveal my feelings. I can see now that that would be a major mistake. “I’m curious,” I say, needing to know. “Why don’t you want to be in a relationship?”
Gazing at me, he says, “Why are we doing this?”
“I’m curious. That’s all.”
He sighs. “Primarily because I don’t have time. Running the firm is pretty much my life.” His mouth quirks into a smile. “You could say that the business is my mistress.” Then the carefree look I’d seen on his face at the cabin appears. “That’s why I enjoyed the time I spent with you at the cabin. It’s such a rare thing for me to let go like that and play.” His CEO face replaces his carefree expression. “But it’s not realistic to expect that to happen very often. It’s just not. And I’ve found that women want more.” He sighs again. “I just don’t have the time or interest to invest in that kind of relationship right now.”
I nod, although inside I’m devastated. He has no interest in investing in a relationship with me. Even so, I can see where this is going. Right now his work is his focus. I can see that if I want to be in his life, the best option is to work as his assistant. That way I can not only help him deal with stresses at work, but when he’s ready to be in a relationship, I’ll be there, already anchored in his life, ready to step in.
I don’t know if I’ll always feel this way—and who knows? Maybe Jonathan and I will become serious. But right now, at this moment, the only thing I want is Drake and to be a part of his life. Not a woman he dates briefly then decides he doesn’t have the energy for. If that means working as his assistant rather than dating him for a while and then being discarded, then I’m in.
The only trade-off is that I’ll have to hide my feelings for him. “Okay then,” I say matter-of-factly. “It sounds to me like we need to pretend today never happened.” My voice wants to shake as I speak, but by sheer force of will I keep it steady. “You may be surprised to know that it’s more important to me to keep this job than to date you, Drake.”
His eyebrows rise, and I know that my statement is unexpected.
“I’m sorry if you’re attracted to me,” I continue, my voice firm. “But that’s your problem. Not mine. It’s not fair to fire me over your own weakness.” I pause, going in for the kill. “You’re the CEO of your own firm. You have all the power. I’m fresh out of college and this is my first real job. What’s not right is you taking that away from me because of your selfish desires.”
His lips part in what I can only assume is shock, and I feel bad for putting it all on him, but I don’t know how else to convince him to keep me as his assistant.
A look of uncertainty fills his face—a look I’ve never seen on him. He’s usually so sure of everything.
DRAKE
“I . . . I’m so sorry,” I say, feeling like the worst person ever. It hadn’t occurred to me that I was putting her in that kind of position, that I had all the power and she was just going along with what I wanted. I thought she was as attracted to me as I am to her. Evidently I was wrong.
She says she’d rather work for me than date me, so obviously I’ve just been projecting my feelings onto her.
“I never thought of it like that before,” I say as I rub my eyes with the heels of my hands, then run my fingers through my hair before meeting her gaze. “You’re right, Ashley. I’m a selfish lowlife.”
ASHLEY
My heart lurches at the look on his face. That’s not what I meant at all. I love him. I want to be with him. That’s the only thing I’m trying to accomplish. As much as I want to comfort him, I’m afraid to say anything that will derail his mind from the direction it seems to be headed now.
He’s quiet for a long minute and I wonder what he’s decided. Is he going to fire me?
“What are you saying?” I ask, not able to take the suspense any longer.
He sighs. “I’m not going to fire you.”
Elation sweeps over me. Yes.
“If . . .” he says, his expression stern.
I stare at him, waiting for the condition.
“If,” he repeats, his voice softer. “You promise to forget about what happened this afternoon. For this to work, we need to go on as if we only know each other at work. We have to keep everything completely aboveboard.”
I nod. I know I’ll never forget any of the times we’ve been together, but I will never admit that to him. “Of course. Completely aboveboard.”
He smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Good. Then we have an understanding.”
“Yes.” I stand up.
Drake doesn’t move, and he seems downcast.
Guilt at the way I manipulated him washes over me and I sit on the edge of the mattress. I think about how he took me in when I was stranded on the side of the road and took care of me. How he came to check on me when I was staying at the hotel, and then saved me from a would-be rapist. How he paid for my car repair without telling me, and then refused to let me repay him. How he
took a chance on hiring me even though we had a brief history together. And how he’s decided now not to fire me. “You’re a good man,” I say.
He looks at me and smiles sadly.
I reach out and touch his face. “You are. Thank you for not firing me. I won’t let you down.”
He turns his head and kisses the palm of my hand, then murmurs, “It’s not you I’m worried about.”
Astonished by his gentle show of affection, and not understanding what he means, I stare at him, then remove my hand. “What did you say?”
He smiles. “Nothing. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
I stand, then gaze at him.
“Thanks again for working from here today,” he says.
He’s already back in CEO mode, and I know our brief interlude is over and done with. “You’re welcome, Mr. Drake. Have a good night.”
With a final glance at his handsome face, I turn and walk away, out of his room, out the front door, out to my car, and back to my life as the assistant to the hottest CEO in Reno.
Twenty-Four
ASHLEY
I drive back to my apartment in a daze, my mind racing. Drake almost fired me. He was about to, right on the verge, but I convinced him to keep me as his assistant.
I blink several times, almost unable to believe I managed to change his mind. But the way I did it makes me feel wretched. He took my words to heart, that it was all his fault. He even apologized, referring to himself as a selfish lowlife.
What he doesn’t know though, is that I’m the one who’s selfish. I shouldn’t have waited for him to fire me. I should have quit.
Drake and Ashley: The Complete Story Page 21
