I did not need some arrogant, jumped up man like Micah looking after me. I didn’t need anyone’s help, I was doing just fine on my own. And I absolutely did not need to be in his debt, vulnerable to him throwing it back in my face somewhere further down the line, telling me I needed him, he saved me.
As the anger sunk in, I stomped into my bedroom, grabbed my phone and furiously typed a text in reply.
Just one question to start with. What. The. Actual. Fuck?
I pressed send and just sat there holding the phone in shaking hands, tears rolling down my cheeks, tears of anger and of humiliation.
~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~
Micah
“Shit.” I muttered to myself and Alex looked up at me, frowning.
“What’s up?”
I pinched the bridge of my nose with my thumb and forefinger and closed my eyes. Okay, no need to panic, I could fix this.
“I think I have monumentally fucked up, Alex. Worse than the bet.”
He narrowed his eyes cautiously. “Jewls?”
I nodded regretfully. “Yep.”
I hesitated for a moment and then pressed call on her name. It rang twice and cut off. I sighed and rang again straight away. This time it only rang once. I tried four times and each time she cut me off.
I let out a groan of frustration and quickly typed out a text.
Answer your phone, Jewls. Please?
I pressed send and looked back at Alex, who was watching me curiously. “I was just trying to help, she’ll see that right?”
He smiled a little. “It would help if I knew what you’d done, Mic.”
“I put something in her letterbox.” I muttered and he grinned at me.
“Micah Machvaya, you dirty dog!”
I rolled my eyes, not in the mood for his jokes and innuendo. “Five hundred quid, I put five hundred in an envelope and put it through her door. I was trying to help her out. Only I think she’s a little pissed at me.”
“Why’d you think she needs five hundred quid?”
“Because…” I started and then it occurred to me that Jewls wouldn’t appreciate me saying all this to Alex, of all people. “Never mind. It was a mistake, I think I’ve offended her.” I paced up and down a few times, debating what to do next, wishing I wasn’t stuck at work. “Alex, can you cover for me, just for twenty minutes? I swear I won’t be long, I just need to see her, explain.”
“No need…” he said, half smiling.
“There’s every need. She won’t answer her phone and isn’t texting me back, I need to get round there and explain.”
“No need…” he repeated and nodded behind me. I spun round and spotted her immediately, stomping through the park like she was heading for war, her eyes fixed on me.
“Jewls-” I started, but that was all I got out before she cut me off.
She held the envelope up. “A word? In private?”
I hesitated and glanced at Alex. He was looking at me like he thought I was in serious trouble, but he looked amused too. Butt munch.
“Um…” I gestured to the waltzer office. “In here.”
She nodded and followed me in. We weren’t open yet so the ride wasn’t working. It occurred to me the office wasn’t exactly private, but apparently that didn’t particularly bother Jewls, who reeled on me the moment I shut the door.
“What the fuck…is this?” she screeched, slamming the envelope into my chest angrily.
“It’s five hundred quid. I got it last night at work. I wanted you to have it.”
“Why on earth are you trying to give me five hundred quid, what makes you think I even need it? Truth, please.”
I wished people would quit demanding the truth of me, because that was what they always got, and sometimes – like now – the truth said out loud didn’t sound good.
“I noticed in your flat…you don’t have a lot of stuff.”
“So? I don’t need stuff.”
“You need shopping though.”
“I know. I plan to go shopping. I don’t need your help for that.”
“And you have money for that?”
“As a matter of fact, I do!” she yelled. “And even if I didn’t, what’s it to you?”
“I just wanted to help you out, Jewls.”
“I’m not a child, I don’t need supporting, I don’t need looking after! I can support myself, I am supporting myself. I never intend to be reliant on a man again, not so long as I live. You start thinking you can control that part of my life, next you’re telling me what to wear, how to speak, where to go…you start out subtle, walking me home to keep me safe…then a phone, next thing I can’t move without you tracking me…it’s not healthy…”
“What are you on about?” I said, my voice rising too in frustration.
“I’m talking about man’s infinite obsession with controlling women. Well not me, not me this time. Not this time.”
“I was just trying to do something nice for you!”
“Yeah? Would you just hand over five hundred to Alex if you thought he had no food in?”
“Probably not.” I conceded.
“So what’s so different about me? Why me if not Alex?”
“I’m not smitten with Alex!” I yelled and then sighed. Fucking hell. The first time I said something like that to her was not supposed to be in an argument.
“You’re not smitten with me either! You just feel sorry for me. There’s a world of difference. Believe it or not, I’m doing just fine looking after myself and this? This is just offensive, can’t you see that?”
“I never meant to offend you, Jewls!”
“No? Then how come you keep doing it?”
“I don’t know!” I shouted, “I guess I’m just not used to this!”
“To what?”
“The heavy stuff, relationships! I’ve never been in a relationship!”
“We’re not in a relationship!”
“Doesn’t stop me wishing we were!” I yelled, my frustration finally getting the better of me. “Fuck, Jewls I can’t stop thinking about you, and I care so much about you!”
“You don’t even know me!”
“I know enough! I fucking like you, I really like you! I wish you’d just let me in. I’m sorry about the money okay? You don’t have to take it, it was just…a thought. It’s not my wages, it was…a tip.”
She narrowed her eyes. “You got a five hundred pound tip?”
“Yes!” I said in an exhale. “There were these rich business types in last night. There was a woman; she took a shine to me. She left me that as a tip. I don’t need it, but I thought you could probably use it. I can see now how it looks but honestly…my intentions were good.”
She let out a sigh, finally seeming to run out of steam. “I don’t doubt it, Micah. But you gotta stop doing this. It’s not your job to look after me.”
I took both her hands in mine and looked at them for a moment. I loved her fingers entwined with mine. It felt like they belonged there. “I wish it was…”
“No you don’t…”
I narrowed my eyes and shook my head. “You know…you can call me an idiot as much as you like. You can say I’m insensitive, offensive, a fool and a control freak – and by the way, I’m none of those things, except maybe a fool – but you can’t tell me how I feel. I know how I feel. I just want you to give me one chance. Because I reckon I could stop acting like such a prick if you just…let me in a bit. I think my racing heart would settle and my mind would clear if only you admitted to me just once, that you feel something for me too. Do you? Do you feel anything?”
She didn’t answer me, and took a couple of steps back, pacing a few times and then stopped with her back to me. “You’re gonna break my heart. And I won’t survive…I just won’t survive.”
“I’m not; I swear I’m not, Jewls. If you give me your heart, I swear I will cherish it, and never let it come to harm.”
I walked to her and put my hands cautiously on her shoulders. I applied just
a little gentle pressure and turned her to face me.
“By all means…tell me when I make a mistake but don’t write me off. I’m human, Jewls. I will fuck up but I will never intentionally hurt you. I wasn’t trying to hurt you.”
“I know…” she mumbled. She was looking down at her feet nervously. “This is all just…you’re just…too good to be true. Can you really be meant for me? You. for me. It’s insane.”
“It’s real. No one is going to jump out from the shadows shouting April fool. This…” I took her right wrist and settled her hand on my chest over my racing heart, “…is real.”
I waited to see what she might do next. She dropped the envelope on the desk beside her and then to my surprise and utter delight, she raised her left hand and settled it on my chest too, palms flat against me.
~~~~~~~~~~***~~~~~~~~~~
Jewls
I couldn’t believe myself I was doing it, but I pressed on ahead anyway, not allowing myself enough time to think too deeply about it. I allowed my hands to glide over his chest, feeling the heat radiating off him even through his tee shirt, and then moved further down, sliding my fingers over his firm abs to his stomach, in a moment of extraordinary bravery allowing them to slide in the gap between his shirt and his jeans, scratching my nails lightly across his stomach. He hissed in response as though he had been burned, and leaned his head back a little. At first I thought I had hurt him, but a look at his expression had me stunned.
Jesus, he was aroused. Was I doing that to him? Was he really aroused? I trailed my hands back up, over the path they had travelled down, further still, up to his face, enjoying the feel of his rough beard on my soft palms and then interlocked my fingers behind his neck, brushing the bottom of his soft hair. He took a step forward, bringing his body up flush with mine and settled his hands on my hips. I hummed in response, entirely against my will as his hands explored up and down my back, making me shiver before settling on my bum.
“I know this is affecting you the same as it is me. Nod if I’m right.”
And just like that I found myself nodding. “Yes…”
“Let me in, Jewls. Please.”
I swallowed. “I’ll try. That’s all I can promise.”
I sensed his smile. “That’s all I ask.”
I took a step back, because frankly I didn’t know how far we’d go if we didn’t break the physical contact and Alex was, after all, about two metres from us. It wasn’t exactly a private exchange.
Once again, I immediately felt cold without his touch. I picked up the envelope and held it out to him. “I can’t accept this. I might not have a lot, but it’s important to me that what I do get, it comes from me. It’s very important. I have money to do a little shopping and I am alright. You don’t need to worry about me. But I absolutely cannot accept money from you. You understand, right?”
Reluctantly he nodded. “Yeah, I understand. But you understand that if you need anything…you can come to me. And if I think that you’re not eating, or in any kind of trouble, I will intervene. I can’t help it, I’m invested in this. You’re too precious to me, far too precious. Tell me you understand.”
I wasn’t sure I did, but I found myself nodding anyway. “Understood.”
He leaned in and kissed my forehead. “Since you’re here…” he reached into the envelope and pulled out a twenty. “Pop to the café and get me and Alex a bacon sandwich and a coffee, there’s a good girl.”
I went to slap him and he ducked, laughing, as I was. He grabbed my wrist, holding on to it to stop my assault. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding!” he protested. I slapped him with my free hand, aiming for the back of his legs but hitting a little higher on his firm bottom. He let out a low sexy growl in response.
“Fuck, Jewls…you can’t do that. Not here, anyway. Can I pop to yours after I finish here? Just for a chat.”
I nodded, smiling. “Course. I’ll even go and buy some milk.”
He handed me another twenty. “Take this.” Before I could protest, he held his hands up. “Can’t have a coffee without some chocolate biscuits. For God’s sake just…take it and get what you need.”
I took it from him and slipped it in his pocket. “I have my own money.”
He rolled his eyes, smiling. “You stubborn…” he slapped my bum, sending shivers right through my body. “So…about those bacon sandwiches?”
It was my turn to roll my eyes and I saluted him playfully. “I’m on it.”
“Ah,” he grinned, “look at you, looking after your boyfriend…”
We had come out from the office and I walked off, calling back to him along the way. “You’re not my boyfriend, buster. Not yet.”
I grinned to myself as I heard him say to Alex, “She loves me. She just doesn’t know it yet.”
~~~~~~~~~~***~~~~~~~~~~
Micah
A part of me wanted to ask her to just hang out with me for the day while I worked, at least until lunchtime, but I knew that wouldn’t be fair on her day off. So when she returned with the bacon sandwiches and coffees for me and Alex I told her to go home and put her feet up, and I would come by after my shift. I made a point of hugging her though, long and hard before I let her go.
Just to give her something to think about for the day.
It was the first time in nine years my head and my heart were not with my work; I was more than a little distracted. Alex took the strain, pretty much running the waltzer single-handedly while I sat about messing with my phone. Jewls and I had gotten into a sort of text flirting thing and I was oblivious to pretty much everything else.
I hope by now you’re on your sofa in your pyjamas watching a movie and thinking of me. Work boring today. Missing you already xxxx M xxxx
Watching Pretty Woman. In my onesie. Lol. Xx J xx
Cookie Monster? :P
No. Leopard print onesie today ;) xx
Ooh purr….nice. You didn’t answer my question. Are you?
Am I what?
Thinking of me? xx M xx
I’m texting you. Ergo yes, thinking of you xx J xx
Infuriating woman. Do you enjoy teasing me?
Yes. Don’t you have work to do?
Yes. But I would rather talk to you.
You can talk to me later. Face to face. Four thirty. Back to work, buster. Those customers won’t flirt with themselves ;)
Ooh…do I detect a hint of jealously Miss Dempsey?
No Mr Machvaya. That’s your ego at work. You know, like you should be. Xx J xx
Ouch! Okay will leave you to it. For the record, Julia Roberts has got nothing on you. Enjoy your day sweetheart. See you at four thirty xx M xx
TTFN. Xx J xx
~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~
Jewls
From four that afternoon, I found myself standing at my living room window, looking out down the street, nerves beginning to kick in. What if coffee was code for something else? What could he possibly want to talk about? Part of me wanted to text and cancel, but the other part – frankly, a much larger part – couldn’t wait to see him, even though it had been less than seven hours and we had been texting on and off most of the day.
I was glad now I had the phone. I found it easier to say things via text than I did face to face and I had even found myself in a sort of flirting war with Micah today – at least, I presumed it was flirting. It wasn’t like I had ever had experience of it before him. Whatever our exchange was, it had been fun and I was feeling really good, in spite of being monumentally pissed this morning over the money. I guess I just couldn’t stay mad at the man for long.
I glanced back outside and there he was, standing directly below smiling up at me. I smiled back beyond my control at the very sight of him and then ran down the stairs to let him in, stopping at the very last minute to try and compose myself. Talk about looking eager, I had to get a grip of myself.
I let out a long, deep breath and opened the door.
“Hey…” I said, trying to sound breezy, probably failin
g miserably.
“Hi,” he said with an answering smile.
I opened the door a little wider. “Come on up.”
“Thanks,” he said, and followed me up the stairs. I could feel his eyes on me the whole way.
We both sort of lingered awkwardly in the living room for a minute or two, in an uncomfortable silence. I gestured to the sofa. “Have a seat. Coffee?”
“Oh God, yes please.” He said with another smile. He flopped on the sofa and kicked his shoes off, placing them neatly to the side.
“Milk, sugar?” I croaked.
“No, thanks. I like mine hot, strong and dark. What uh…what about you?”
I rolled my eyes and smirked. “Smooth and sweet.”
He actually chuckled at that and shook his head. “Good, good…”
I made the drinks and set them on the coffee table, hovering again for a moment before perching on the edge of the sofa. Micah simply watched me, amused. He sat back, making himself comfortable and held his arms open.
“Can I get a hug? You can tell yourself it’s just a mate thing if it makes it easier?”
I narrowed my eyes, letting him know I was making a mental note of all his poking fun at me, and then sat further back on the sofa. He groaned and shook his head.
“Oh, hell no, Miss Dempsey.”
And with that, he grabbed me round my waist, lifted me as though I weighed nothing at all, and deposited me on his lap, wrapping both his arms around me in a gesture that said stay put.
Gypsy Kiss: Book 1: Micah (The Gypsy Kiss Series) Page 10
