“It’s good to see you again…”
“Don’t you look at me like that,” Kara snapped, pointing her index at Chase. “Don’t you dare look at me like that.”
“I wasn’t even looking at you. You’ve lost your damn mind.”
I didn’t scare easy, but these two set my fur on edge. The sooner Penelope dealt with them, the better, but I was beginning to lose hope in the idea that she’d ever get them to kiss at all. They truly hated each other, the emotion rolled off them in waves and collided in the center of the hall.
“Why don’t we all settle down?” Ami suggested, stroking me compulsively. Her hands calming herself more than anything.
“I’ll settle down when he stops staring at me. You can’t hide the fact that you want to start an argument. What is it about me that drives you nuts? Are you jealous?” Kara folded her arms, multiple gold and silver bracelets clinking with the movement.
“Ha! Jealous? Of what!”
“I have…”
“That’s enough,” Dr. Luke said, cold tone cutting across the arguments, spilling cool water on the fire. “Now, if you two can’t behave, I’m sure Penelope will have to ask you to leave. Look at how upset you’ve made her.”
He gestured and I looked over at my mistress. She was as pale as a sheet, shaking a little too. Pen wasn’t good at conflict and the negative energy flying around in the room probably made her feel even weaker. Couple that with her waning magical skills and you had a recipe for disaster.
“Don’t leave,” Ami said, right away, good girl that she was. She knew that Kara and Chase had to stay and that they had to kiss. “But do calm down. Let’s all go settle down in the living room and talk.”
I could think of nothing I wanted to do less. I leaped out of Ami’s arms and landed at Penelope’s feet, then walked between her legs, stroking myself against her to offer her some strength.
“I…I’d better check on the fajitas,” she said, and rushed into the kitchen.
I followed hot on her heels and sat down to stare at her, fiddling with the tortillas she’d arranged on each plate. She spotted me and wiped her forehead. “Oh Tali, what are we going to do about this? They can barely stand the sight of each other. How will they ever kiss?”
I flicked my tail into the air and nudged a ketchup bottle toward her, the beginnings of an idea brewing in my whip-quick brain. This had to work…it was our only option, and maybe it could help me with the Penelope and Dr. Luke situation too.
The ketchup bottle hit her hand and she looked from me to the bottle and back again.
“Talisman! That’s a brilliant idea.”
Chapter 12
“ETA on those fajitas?” Ami asked, sitting on the sofa squished between two positively fuming humans. Kara and Chase had folded their arms again and stared off in opposite directions, refusing to meet each other’s gazes. Dr. Luke looked like he wanted the San Andreas Fault to rip through the living room and swallow him down into a rocky abyss.
They haven’t stopped fighting since they got here, Tali, I don’t like it. Lola sidled up to me and purred, then rubbed against my side and twined her tail in mine. I wish you could get them to stop.
Just you wait, baby doll, you’re about to witness magic. Talisman’s own special brand of influential magic.
I looked up at Pen, who stood clutching an empty wine bottle between her palms. “The fajitas will be ready in twenty minutes or so.”
“Twenty minutes!” Kara through her hands up in the air. “I can barely stand to be in the same room with him for five minutes, let alone twenty. I think I should leave.”
“Oh no you don’t, I’ve wanted to leave since the start of this charade. If anyone’s leaving it’s me.” Chase rose and towered over the couch and its residents.
Ami rolled her eyes, grabbed him by the arm and jerked him down again. “Nobody’s leaving,” she said. “What did you want to say, Pen?”
The doorbell rang a second later and Penelope rushed out to answer it before she could introduce her master plan. I tapped my tail against the boards, irritated that this was taking so long.
My solution was perfect, it would lead to a broken spell for Kara and Chase, but that was nothing. What I really wanted was the broken spell for Penelope. The minute her lips touched Dr. Luke’s we’d be free, and there’d be no need for a meeting with Dagda Cerridwyn or a grand scale plan to stop Lucinda Chokecherry.
“Ami,” Penelope said, bustling through the door carrying the wine bottle, “look who I found waiting on the doorstep.”
Eldris entered directing a sheepish smile around the room and nodding a greeting. He ruffled the back of his hair until it stuck up at a strange angle, then made brief eye contact with Ami.
“Hiya, Eldris,” she whispered, a breath of anticipation, and gave Penelope a sharp look. Apparently, Pen had decided to work her magic on Eldris and Ami as well. Hopefully not the literal kind which’d landed us in the Chase and Kara mess. I didn’t think I could take it if Ami turned on me. I needed all hands on deck.
“It’s good to see you,” Eldris said, walking over to her and taking her hand.
She rose and he pressed his lips to her skin, cheeks coloring. These folks were constantly blushing, it was like inhabiting the inside of a ketchup bottle. Or living on a tomato vine, or…
Yeah, we get it Cat Deeley, let’s get on with the show.
Sorry, I don’t think I can dance.
Sage gave an exasperated hoot and snubbed me by turning his beak skyward. I sidled up to Penelope and wound around her legs, nudging her so she’d come back to her senses and stop staring at Eldris and Ami with that satisfied smile. She blinked down at me, then the bottle in her hand, her mouth forming into a tiny ‘o’ of surprise.
“Everyone, I’ve had a wonderful idea for how we can spend the evening. Or rather, until the fajitas are ready.”
“What is it, Pen?” Kara asked, with a sweet smile. She was normal to everyone but Chase, a side-effect of the botched magic.
“Spin the bottle,” she pronounced, lifting the wine bottle high. She noticed the severely unimpressed expressions of her guests and floundered for a second. “I…look it could be fun. Who’s played this since they were in high school? Kind of like a blast from the past, you know. I even have a re-mix of high school tunes all ready to play on my iPod.”
Eldris and Ami shared a look full of secrets, and she lowered her gaze to the floor, smiling softly. “I think it’s a great idea,” she said.
“I second that,” Eldris put in.
“I’m all for it if everyone else is,” Dr. Luke said, dusting off his jeans and meeting Penelope’s gaze. He sure was a handsome fella, though Pen seemed determined not to notice it. Maybe, just maybe, even hotter than human Talisman.
“Great,” Penelope replied, before Kara and Chase could voice the protests bubbling on their lips.
Pen organized everyone on the floor, ignoring the protests from the two ‘lovers’ and placed the bottle in the middle. She spun it once, clapping her hands in delight when it landed on Kara. “That means you get to go first,” she said, pointing at the woman opposite her.
Kara gave her a weak smile, still unimpressed, and gripped the bottle in one hand. Pen and Ami gave each other a dose of side-eye. This was it.
The bottle had to land on Chase.
But what if it doesn’t? Lola sat beside me, just outside the circle of humans.
Oh it will, you can believe that. And if it doesn’t, I’ll nudge it into place when no one’s looking.
Kara spun the bottle and everyone watched its arc, listening to the rattle of the glass on the floorboards as it slowed from a green blur into a bottle shape. It slowed, whoosh, whoosh, whoosh, and landed on…Chase.
That saved me a lot of trouble.
Kara and Chase glared at each other across the circle, both shaking their heads. Justin Timberlake trilled in the background about bringing sexy back.
Yeah.
“No way,” Kara sa
id.
“Uh-uh.” Chase chimed in at the same time.
“Rules are rules,” Penelope replied, firming her tone. “You can’t break the rules, guys. Just kiss and get it over and done with so we can move on with the game.” Her eyes narrowed, trying to force them with sheer will and a reluctance to be rude to their hostess.
Kara rolled her eyes but scuffled forward on her knees and Chase, not to be outdone by his newest enemy, followed her example. They met in the middle, leaned forward and their lips connected.
Everyone laughed and clapped hands, and Penelope grasped the bottle and spun it absentmindedly. She was intent on the result of the kiss, not on where her turn landed. Now was my chance!
I dashed forward the minute the bottle settled and batted it until it faced Dr. Luke, then I slunk back.
Kara and Chase parted, gazes filled with shy admiration.
“Funny,” Kara breathed, “I don’t remember what we were fighting about.”
“I believe it was about leaving first,” Eldris said, helpfully, and Ami nudged him in the ribs to shut him up.
“I don’t believe I’d fight with you for no reason, but now that you mention it, I don’t remember why or what either. That’s kinda crazy.” Chase settled back, his hands grasping his thighs and the light of consideration in his stare. It looked as if something was cooking in the kitchen and it wasn’t just fajitas.
Kara swallowed and touched her fingers to her lips. “I’d like to do that again.”
This wasn’t magic, this was what happened when you let nature run its course. Poor Pen, if she hadn’t interfered, these two would probably have ended up with each other regardless.
“And I’d like to take you out on a date some time,” Chase replied, reaching across the space to take her hand.
I made sure he didn’t nudge the bottle off Dr. Luke, who sat staring at the pair as if they’d each promptly grown a pair of wings a piece. Their change in behavior obviously baffled him.
Penelope and Ami grinned at each other and Ami washed her hands like Pontius Pilate, passing down a judgment. Peace had returned, but I couldn’t care much about Chase and Kara when Pen still hadn’t seen where her spin had landed.
She looked down and gasped. Dr. Luke followed her line of sight.
Time seemed to slow as they looked from the bottle to each other and back again, both grinning. This was the moment we’d waited for. Dr. Luke and Pen would finally have to kiss. Nothing could stop them now.
Intruder alert!
Chapter 13
Please tell me you’re joking. We’re seconds from freeing Penelope once and for all.
Dr. Luke was Pen’s true love, there wasn’t a doubt in my mind or Dr. Luke’s for that matter. Penelope was the only one who didn’t see it, and I’d had to avoid changing to human form because of that.
Penelope and Dr. Luke were inches from each other. He had one hand on her shoulder, bringing his lips in for a chaste first kiss. Penelope’s eyes were closed, revealing the perfect lines of her liquid eyeliner.
It’s Stout and he’s coming in hotter than butter on a stack of mouse pancakes.
That’s disgusting.
So is Elias Stout. What’s the definition of a lawyer?
I give.
A mouth with a life support system attached to it.
Funny, Owl Bundy.
Sage sounded harried, even in my thoughts and I didn’t blame him. We’d worked hard trying to keep Penelope safe and all we’d gotten so far was trouble, trouble and more trouble. Whether it was in the shape of nosy Elias Stout or demonic Damien Chokecherry.
Can you stall him?
It’s too late Catmosabe, he’s on the stairs and through the door already.
True to form, the door to the living room slammed open, banging against the wall and bouncing back to collide with Stout’s face.
Everyone shrieked, and Dr. Luke and Penelope sprang apart without achieving true love’s kiss. If I’d had a voice box I would’ve screamed my rage and if I’d had toddler arms, I would’ve thrown one hell of a shit fit on the living room floor raving about my Cheerios and my juice box.
This was ridiculous. Getting Pen to kiss the vet had become my life’s mission, which was definitely not what I’d signed up for when I’d been adrift in the pre-birth cat ether.
Elias Stout stood framed in the doorway, pale and sweaty, with his collar open to expose the short slab of meat which led down past the buttons and to his navel. He was hairless as a baby.
Not all babies are born without hair.
Sure, you can’t stop Elias Stout on the doorway, but random natal trivia is your thing. What would we do without you, Sage?
That’d better be a serious question. You would’ve been dead nine times over without me. Game finally over.
“Elias?” Ami asked, rising slowly. Eldris joined her. They were practically attached at the hip and Ami definitely didn’t seem to mind. She’d always been more savvy than Penelope when it came to the dating game. She had her fingers twined in Eldris’ as she gazed up at him with adoration.
Stout snapped his head around and stared at her, then his gaze travelled down her arm and to that link with Eldris. His eyes darkened with bubbling psychotic rage.
Oh boy, this doesn’t look good.
I scrunched up beside Lola to watch the outburst, and she buried her face in my fur to avoid the sight of it. Smart kitty, she realized danger when she saw it and Elias was Danger with a capital D. I’d never realized how much until I’d entered his abode and saw rats riding dirt bikes.
“You,” Elias said, pointing a finger at Penelope, his raspy voice squishing out of his mouth in a croak. “You wretched, evil little witch.”
“Hey!” Dr. Luke rose immediately. “Don’t you dare talk to Penelope like that. This is her home and she’s entertaining guests.”
Pen stood up, knocking the bottle with her feet as she did so, a sore reminder of the failed game and kiss. “What do you want, Elias? You weren’t invited.” Pen’s shoulders were back and straight, as if someone had inserted a broomstick between them. This was her at her fieriest. I liked it when she got in one of these moods. Dr. Luke would too and then he’d become addicted to feisty Pen.
“You broke into my house and stole my phone! I know you did it. I want that phone back.” Elias laid out a palm to accept the imaginary device. Little did he know it was at the bottom of his mucky fish tank. Maybe if he cleaned once in a while he’d know that.
Kara and Chase stood together in the corner, canoodling and joking, but they frowned and looked over at Elias the minute he chucked the accusation at Pen.
“What’s this about a phone?” Chase asked, slipping his arm around Kara’s shoulders and guiding her forward. “I’m sorry but you’re not invited to this party. Uh, it’s kind of a couple’s thing.”
Elias’ psychobabble ceased for a moment and he glared at Chase and Kara, assessing their fresh connection. Yeah, this wouldn’t end well. Elias had witnessed the first of their fireworks-inducing fights and Pen’s slip-up spell.
“How? Wha…?” Stout turned to Penelope again, shaking from head-to-toe, a quivering leaf on a willow tree. “I want my phone back. I suggest you give it to me if you know what’s good for you.”
“Is that a threat?” Dr. Luke asked, taking a step forward, putting more distance between Elias and Penelope. She stared at the good doctor’s back and the corners of her lips twitched upwards in the beginnings of a smile, which was quickly suppressed by Elias’ hissing.
“Yes, that’s a threat. I’ll take you to court. And I knew a really good lawyer. I’ll bury you in legal fees.”
What’s the difference between a lawyer and a vulture? Sage poised himself to soar on to Stout’s head again.
Frequent flyer miles.
Bada Bing. I still had my kitty savoir faire. Did you hear that, doll?
Lola licked my inner ear. I did, hot stuff. A sense of humor is so sexy.
“I don’t have your phone. Why
would I steal your phone when I have a perfectly good one of my own?” Pen took her cell out and held it up to the light so everyone could see.
“Because you wanted the evidence.”
“What evidence?” Dr. Luke asked, reaching back to grasp Penelope’s hand and pull her up behind him. The set of his jaw was the same as the night he’d found Chokecherry in Penelope’s garden. “You’d better start talking before I call the cops.”
“Call the cops, ha! I’m the one who should call the cops. She stole my phone so that no one would see the truth about her being a witch, about her casting a spell to…”
“That’s enough,” Ami said, “you’re not making any sense. I think you should leave, Elias.”
Stout refused to look at his onetime crush, Ami, and continued staring directly ahead. “Oh, I’ll leave once I get my phone. I know what’s going on. I saw the woman in the clearing in red, it could only have been you, witch girl.”
I froze and stared at Elias, but then, so did everyone else. The woman in red? In the clearing? That sounded exactly like what Fawn had described. Ami broke away from Eldris a second later with a quick apology.
She rushed out of the door without another word.
Sage, keep an eye on Ami, she’s coming out in a second. I want to know which way she goes.
On it.
I prodded Lola with the edge of my nose and she straightened and blinked her baby blues at me. Feel like going on an adventure?
I go where you go, Tali.
That’s my girl.
Eldris stared after Ami in utter confusion and even Elias paused his terrorizing rant to gape at her sudden departure.
“Ami?”
“Don’t worry about me,” she called from the front door, “I just have to check something out. Oh, and Pen? I think the fajitas are burning.”
“No!” Penelope yelled, and rushed past Elias to save her precious Mexican food.
Eldris stepped up to Elias and glared at him. “You have no right coming in here, Stout, no right at all. And you’re so old the key on Benjamin Franklin’s kite was to your house.”
Fur Magic Boxed Set: Talisman, Sage, Fawn, Lola: Paranormal Romantic Comedy Page 18
