Guilt Edged

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Guilt Edged Page 21

by Judith Cutler


  I managed a rueful smile. ‘As is the Devon colleague I mentioned. And actually I did have the hots for him at one time.’

  ‘And?’

  This didn’t seem to be a conversation about cops and robbers any more. ‘And then I found out he was married. Shame. Horrible wife. But he’d got kids and—’ I shrugged. ‘You don’t need his name, Carwyn, you really don’t. They’re still together, and a policeman turning up on their doorstep with a hot tip from me …’

  ‘Isn’t going to improve their domestic harmony,’ he concluded. ‘But if Devon and Cornwall can’t find this potter, you may have to tell me eventually. I liked the way you made that thieving bugger up there writhe,’ he said as I unlocked the car. ‘Written evidence isn’t exactly his thing, is it? You know what, if he hadn’t claimed he had no insurance I’d have put good money on him having wrecked that shop himself.’

  ‘You know what? So would I. And if I were you I’d get your mates on to all the insurance companies you can think of. Just in case.’

  The conversation ended with a smile that started as conspiratorial and ended simply friendly.

  I drove home via Sainsbury’s – where I found bedlinen, but no curtains, plus food and champagne – and then via Bossingham. Pa was pretty subdued, which didn’t surprise me. Bored to the back teeth, I suspected, now the work for Titus had dried up.

  ‘It’s for the best,’ I said. ‘You know exactly what I mean, so don’t argue. And don’t even dream of looking for another dealer, because the moment you do I’ll strip these new sheets off the bed and make the biggest bonfire you’ve ever seen. With any fakery on top. OK?’

  ‘OK.’ He didn’t sound particularly remorseful. ‘Fancy a drop of this shampoo, old thing?’

  TWENTY-FIVE

  Griff claimed to be amused by Pa’s response, but I knew he was saddened that I’d taken Pa’s offer of overnight accommodation seriously enough to help prepare a bedroom, even though I insisted I’d only ever use it if Pa himself was ill. Oh, and when Titus had organized the mattress.

  ‘It was either that or sneak into the main part of the house and have my sleeping habits exposed to the world,’ I said lightly – and truthfully – as we ate a very late lunch. ‘Any news of Toby? This bread is some of your best ever.’

  Griff shook his head. ‘Only if no change is news. Richard tells me that he doesn’t know of any family who should be notified.’

  ‘You mean that Charles hasn’t been able to run them to earth yet. What a weird job for a young man,’ I said. ‘Or for a young woman, come to think of it. Why should he put up with being at someone’s beck and call twenty-four seven? He’s not even spoken to politely.’

  ‘If the alternative is the dole-queue … I should imagine, of course, that he earns a decent amount.’

  ‘I should hope he does – but I bet a lot of it comes in kind, not cash. “Charles, dear boy, finish the smoked salmon and champagne.”’ Where was his spine? Putting up with such treatment!

  ‘Was I wrong to think you quite liked him? Charles, I mean?’

  ‘I might have done. But I liked the outward things, if you see what I mean. Like the fact he’s a good dancer – jives like the guy in Dirty Dancing.’ We shared a giggle. ‘Not that he looks much like him, of course – more like a cricket captain. Pity about his eyesight. Perhaps that’s why he ended up where he did. Though I’d have thought that with his voice he ought to become a vicar.’

  ‘I fancy you need more than a wonderful pulpit manner to be ordained.’ He smiled: he was prepared to let the matter drop. ‘Speaking of which, any news of poor Freya yet? No? You have been a little too busy to enquire, perhaps. Though you could have dropped in at the rectory while you were visiting your father.’ For while read instead.

  To oblige him, I texted Robin immediately, and for good measure texted Freya too; even if hospital regulations forbade the use of mobile technology, I wouldn’t mind betting she’d ignore them.

  As he cleared the plates, Griff asked, ‘If you’re not keen on Charles, which palpably you’re not, what are your feelings about that delectable young Welshman?’

  ‘Carwyn?’ Who hadn’t come back to me with news about the people who’d wrecked the emporium, despite what I’d thought was tacit agreement. Meanwhile Griff, who missed little, was waiting. ‘But … I thought he was gay,’ I admitted.

  ‘Campish, sweet one. But I’d say he only dances at your end of the ballroom. Preferably with you, I’d have thought?’

  ‘Really? You don’t mean—’ Occasionally, Griff still managed to make me blush. ‘I just thought he was a really nice guy. But – and it’s a big, huge, giant, enormous but – he’s a policeman. And after Morris I really do not do policemen.’ I took a deep breath. ‘It’s all about trust, isn’t it? Pa and Titus: I hate lying about what they get – correction, got – up to. But I’d never grass them up deliberately, and I’m always on edge that I might do it accidentally.’

  ‘And though you might ditch Titus – not that for a minute I’m suggesting you do, loathe him though I may – you can’t ditch your father. I quite understand. Any more,’ he added with a rueful grin, ‘than I could ditch Aidan. Who hasn’t been in touch since we got home. I hope he’s all right.’

  I thought of that beautiful house and its wonderful contents, including the miniatures, of course. ‘So do I.’ Flipping the phone across to him, I said, ‘Your turn to text.’

  By supper time there’d been no response to any of the texts, and there was no denying that Griff was quite agitated. He even tried the old-fashioned phone, leaving a message, but that made matters rather worse. I looked at the rain trickling down the windows and listened to the howl of the wind in the chimneys, but had to say it anyway: ‘When we’ve eaten, do you want me to nip across to Tenterden to see if everything’s OK? And no, you can’t come with me.’

  ‘Yes, I can, and yes, I shall. Even if I do no more than sit in the car with the mobile phone ready to summon the cavalry.’

  ‘That’s all you do – promise?’ I slapped the side of my head. ‘Griff, Aidan uses the same security firm as us! If Geoff’s on duty he should be able to tell us if everything’s OK. And if it isn’t, he’d be the first to know.’

  Griff smiled. ‘He would indeed. Whether he’d tell you anything—’

  ‘How do you think I got out of Toby’s strong room?’ I asked, touching the side of my nose.

  But it was someone I didn’t know who was on duty, and hearing his voice I decided not to push my luck. Even a hint of what Geoff had done could get him the sack, so I invented a trivial enquiry – actually, not so trivial, since I asked if the people his colleagues had regularly seen lurking near our premises were anywhere around. The answer was the sharp negative of a man who rightly suspected his valuable time was being wasted.

  Thank God I’d insisted on fog-lights when we’d bought the car. Not that it was foggy, but it was raining so hard that it was difficult to tell where the road ended and the verges began. Half the time the wipers were on maximum speed. I didn’t dare switch on the radio in case it distracted me, though I know Griff would have liked some music to think about. In fact, it wasn’t long before he started King Lear, the bits about it being a naughty night to swim in and hurricanoes blowing.

  Aidan’s house looked occupied: lights were on in several rooms, and they went on and off as if someone was moving around. That might have been as a result of his security system, of course, but there were two cars parked on his drive, one his own, and the other, further from the security light, vaguely familiar. However, this weather didn’t invite car inspections. No one responded when I pressed the buzzer to ask for the gates to be opened, even when I smiled and waved at the cameras so he’d know it wasn’t an invading army waiting to rampage.

  When I turned to Griff with a shrug of frustration, I found him already halfway out of the car. Without a blink he tapped in the code, and we were in. Or could have been. Instead, I manoeuvred the Fiesta so that it lay across the gates; no
one could drive in or out. Shooing Griff back in, I dashed to the front door and put my thumb on the doorbell, which rang loud and long enough to waken the dead, thus confirming, of course, Aidan’s belief that I was an inferior form of life with no manners. I was sure he’d tell me again when he flung open the door.

  But it wasn’t Aidan who responded in fury to the bell. It was Charles. He was wearing one of Aidan’s dressing-gowns, which, given the difference in leg-length, revealed a very great deal of him.

  ‘What the hell are you doing here?’ he demanded.

  ‘I could ask you the same,’ I said mildly, hoping the effort not to choke with fury – or with laughter – wouldn’t show. To think I’d been worried that Carwyn might be gay, and all the time someone I did once fancy, for all I’d denied to it to Griff, was here with Aidan. I’d never noticed any attraction between them at Richard’s. Never.

  ‘I’m here as Aidan’s guest. What do you think you’re doing?’ As I stepped towards me he gave me a violent shove in the chest.

  ‘Just stepping out of the rain. Lovely porch, isn’t it, but not very effective when the wind’s in this direction. Charles, I really need to speak to Aidan – you don’t suppose I’d come out on a night like this if it really wasn’t necessary, do you?’

  ‘I’m afraid he’s tied up at the moment,’ he said with an unbecoming smirk, just to make sure I got the innuendo, which didn’t sound any better in that lovely voice of his.

  ‘I’ll bet he is. I’ve heard the longer you’re kept in suspense, as it were, the greater the sexual intensity.’ His smirk deepened. ‘So my guess is that he’s been – er – tied up for some time while you’ve been casing the joint.’

  ‘How dare you! You make me sound like a common thief.’

  ‘Do I? I’m sorry. Aidan says I always betray my origins when I use cant expressions. I should have said “while you’ve been going from room to room looking at the wonderful objets d’art that Aidan has on display”. I’m sure you haven’t nicked anything – yet – because to be quite honest you really don’t have anywhere to conceal anything, do you? Anything at all.’ I permitted myself to lower my eyes a little and risked a sarcastic giggle – it was better than letting him realise how angry and upset I was. It was quite clear that he was not pleased to see me. At all. ‘Charles, why don’t you go and free Aidan, just so I can see he’s all right? It’d be so embarrassing for him if Griff found him. Humiliating. Upsetting for Griff, too, which wouldn’t be good for his heart. They’ve been together for over twenty years,’ I added truthfully.

  ‘Just get out.’

  ‘Oh, I think not,’ Griff declared, in a voice remarkably like Brian Blessed’s – deep, loud, carrying. A foghorn of a voice. A very actorly voice. And Aidan would have heard it whichever room he was trapped in.

  ‘For God’s sake, just go and set the man free,’ I hissed. ‘Don’t be so damned malicious! Or,’ I added in the tone and accent I’d used as a no-hope kid in care, ‘I’ll forget that Griff’s dragged me up from the gutter and remember how I used to make people do things they didn’t want. Right?’

  Right. With a huge sneer that didn’t quite disguise a sudden rush of fear at the way the girl he’d taken dancing had metamorphosed into a particularly vicious worm, he turned as if to do as he was told. Griff was an inch behind him to make sure he did. Griff! What the hell did he think he was doing?

  I set off hell for leather after him, but he didn’t follow Charles into Aidan’s room. What a dear, tactful man. I didn’t go in either, but I did call out: ‘Aidan, as soon as you’re decent, come out, please.’

  I didn’t have to wait long. Eyes ablaze with fury, though I wasn’t sure whom it was directed at – even himself, perhaps – he exploded on to the landing, sporting one of his more splendid dressing-gowns. ‘What the hell do you think you’re doing here?’

  With an insolent shrug, I pulled my most irritating face. ‘Several guesses, Aidan?’ And then I remembered he was not just Griff’s lover, but also his friend. If Griff cared enough to maintain the relationship, I would have to as well. ‘Why don’t I make a cup of tea and explain?’

  With Aidan fully dressed, but Charles still in the skimpy robe, I went into a bizarre sort of hostess-mode, even though I was wondering what – and where – the hell Griff had got to. The kitchen was the room Aidan was least at home in, so I kept us there, putting the mugs of tea or coffee and a plate of biscuits – Griff’s home-made ones, as it happened – on the expensive and rarely used table. The fact that we were in what had become more my territory than his unsettled Aidan even further. In fact, I was getting worried about him: he might be younger than Griff but he hadn’t had me exercising him and looking after his diet, as Griff had. So a heart attack or even a stroke wasn’t impossible.

  ‘Aidan, I’m only here because Griff was worried about you. You didn’t respond to his texts or answer either of your phones. Of course he was worried – he was afraid you’d be like Toby, unconscious, maybe dying. Do you think I’d have brought him out on a night like this if I hadn’t thought he was right to worry? Neither of us was spying on you, or wanted to catch you with your trousers down.’ Oh dear: I really hadn’t meant to say that. I raised an apologetic hand, like tennis players when an awkward bounce of the net means they’ve scored a point they didn’t deserve. ‘Seriously, this is just a matter for the two of you to sort out.’

  ‘So why are you still here? Why didn’t you just go when you … when you realized … Heavens, did you think Charles was a burglar or something?’

  This time I did manage to keep my face straight – yes, and serious too. ‘Not a burglar. Because you’d invited him in.’

  ‘Are you implying that he was trying to rob me?’ he squeaked.

  ‘Why not ask him? Yes, why not? Or check the good miniatures, not the ones in Griff’s room. The ones you showed me.’

  ‘This is outrageous and preposterous,’ Aidan declared.

  Still no Griff.

  Charles leapt in. ‘Of course it is. You warned me about her, remember?’

  Did he indeed? I wondered when. Before or after we’d boogied the night away? And there was I thinking he fancied me and it was only my common sense and decency that had kept him out of my bed. Perhaps I should have said that aloud. Instead I said mildly, ‘It would cost you nothing to check.’

  ‘Of course it wouldn’t,’ Charles said. But his face seemed stiffer than usual, and his voice less resonant. What was he up to? ‘And don’t forget to check all the cupboards and in the safe.’

  ‘Why don’t you start with the safe,’ I agreed, ‘while Charles and I stay here? That way neither of us gets to see the combination. And I’ll bet that if you’ve got a masterpiece of a miniature, that’s where it will be.’

  Aidan stared furiously at me, but then got up and left us alone in the kitchen. I didn’t feel it necessary to start a conversation. Neither did Charles, ruminating on the implications of what I’d said.

  It was like being in a dentist’s waiting room. The elegant kitchen clock, about the only timepiece in the house that wasn’t two hundred years old, ticked irritatingly away: perhaps if he changed it he’d spend more time in the kitchen. Aidan was away so long that I thought he must have run into Griff. In fact he must have been checking the whole house, because he came back with a vicious smile on his face. ‘Everything is where it should be. Now, get out of my house before I recommend that Charles takes legal action against you for unlawful detention and defamation.’

  ‘And there I thought it was you that was unlawfully detained,’ I said affably. ‘I’d love to leave your house, but I can’t without Griff, can I? Did you find him?’

  ‘You can wait in the car.’

  ‘Don’t worry – I will.’

  TWENTY-SIX

  Griff was in the passenger seat of the car, shaking. Shock? What should I do? Go back and, cramming humble pie down my throat, ask Aidan to call his tame doctor? But even as I dragged open the passenger door I realized that he w
as convulsed with laughter.

  ‘Get in and let me shut the door, my love! We’re both getting soaked!’

  I didn’t argue. He slammed the door and I ran. Collapsing in the driver’s seat I gasped, ‘Tell!’

  ‘May I suggest you move the car first? In fact, I’d further suggest you put a good deal of road between us and Tenterden. You might even want to go the back way, if you can see well enough.’

  ‘Via Leeds? Hell’s bells. The Ashford road’s bad enough …’ But I wanted him to talk.

  The wretched man kept mum until we were clear of the town, though still lapsing into occasional giggles.

  ‘My darling, you are a heroine,’ he said at last. ‘That appalling drive, then bearding two monsters in one den. And now – can it actually be raining harder?’

  ‘Probably. So what were you up to?’

  ‘Listening in, some of the time. But when Aidan went walkabout, I beat a judicious retreat. Not empty handed.’ He was off again, his chortles almost drowning the slap of the wipers.

  ‘You didn’t nick his best silver! No, you couldn’t have done. He’d have noticed.’

  ‘I did better. I nicked Charles’s clothes. No, they’re not in the car; you’re not an accessory after the fact. You know that holly hedge, designed to keep would-be plunderers at bay? The one with particularly sharp points? That’s where poor Charles will find his clothes. It’s likely he won’t be able to wear them again. I know, I know … But hell hath no fury like an old queen scorned. And in years to come I dare say Aidan and I will laugh about it.’

  I gaped. If anyone had betrayed me like that I’d never want to see him again.

  ‘My loved one, I can tell you’re appalled. But neither of us would win medals for fidelity. We’ve remained friends because – well, who knows why?’

  ‘You can forgive him – for that?’

  ‘Without wishing to usurp dear Robin – and unless I’m much mistaken we still haven’t heard from him – forgiveness is an excellent idea. Boiling with resentment hurts you more than it hurts the person you’ve got a grudge against – who probably doesn’t know, anyway. My late and pretty much unlamented father – who died well into his nineties – spent his twilight years reliving all the battles he’d had during his long and colourful life. And this time round he won them all. By then his opponents had been dead thirty or forty years, of course. But he still got his blood pressure spiking away to horrific heights because of those real or imagined slights. Foolish old man. And, to be profoundly serious, my love, when I was awaiting my operation, I was getting flashbacks of all the awful things I’d ever done and deeply regretting them. And asking forgiveness. In fact, while I was waiting for the anaesthetic to kick in, I was reciting the Lord’s Prayer. I got as far as “forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us”. I had to wait till I woke up to finish it.’ He chuckled. ‘But, dear one, I’m no saint, and I did so enjoy tucking those Armani underpants into the hedge.’

 

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