by The Stud
At night. Of course. She supposed it would be easier in the dark. Then again, she doubted it would. Thought of being naked with Spencer—with Spencer Smith of the dashing scar, author, adventurer and expert on women—was daunting.
But she wanted that baby.
"We can't sleep together, " she informed him in an attempt to set some rules that would make her less shaky. "I mean, we can't spend the whole night together. "
He frowned. "Why not?"
"Because this is a business arrangement It wouldn't be right"
He looked displeased. "But I was looking forward to having a warm body next to me. And what if we want to do it more than once? Am I supposed to run back and forth down the hall?"
"We can't do it more than once in one night. The books say that would be counterproductive. You'd be continually depleted. "
Spencer arched a brow. "Some men might be depleted, but when I get going—"
She interrupted. "Please, Spencer? I'm trying to get comfortable with the idea of this, but you're not making it easy. "
"It'd be plenty easy, " he groused, "if you'd swing with it a little. This doesn't have to be all work, y'know. "
"But it does. The only reason we're doing it is so I can have a baby. It's not like we feel anything for each other. "
"We don't have to feel anything to be able to enjoy each other's bodies. I liked touching your breast. I might just like touching the rest of you, and the feeling may be mutual. I'm told I'm a decent lover. "
"I'm sure you're a wonderful lover, but I can't play games. " Feeling vulnerable, she whispered, "Please, Spencer? I've agreed to do things your way because I want this baby more than anything, but I can't pretend this is something it's not. I want everything we do to be honest. Please?"
Spencer stared at her for a long time. Finally, looking rebellious but determined, he got to his feet. "I'll be here on the sixth. If there's any change in the plan, you know how to reach me. " Without another word, he left.
Chapter 5
The sixth of July fell on a Saturday. Given a choice, Jenna would have had it fall on a weekday, when she could busy herself at McCue's from morning to night and thereby keep her nervousness about being with Spencer in check. But her ovaries knew nothing about apprehension. They operated the same as always. Her temperature followed its established pattern, staying well below normal in prelude to a dip on the eighth.
Spencer called on Friday morning before she left for work. "Just wanted to confirm our date, " he said.
"It's not a date, " Jenna chided. "It's an appointment. " She was determined to keep things on the up-and-up regarding the exact nature of their liaison. Spencer hadn't chosen her as a lover. She couldn't pretend that he had—and she couldn't let him think she was pretending it. That would be humiliating. Things were awkward enough without it.
"Appointment, then, " he conceded in a deep but agreeable voice. "Are we on?"
"Yes. "
"Good. " Nonchalantly, he said, "I made an appointment to have some work done on the plane. The best mechanic around is at Norwood Airport, which is about an hour's drive from your place. Feel like taking a ride and picking me up there tomorrow afternoon?"
"Uh, sure. "
"That way we can talk a little before we—well, we can talk. "
For a split second Jenna imagined that he was feeling awkward himself. Then she ruled out the possibility. Spencer wouldn't feel awkward about sex. He was too experienced for that.
"Sounds fine, " she said, managing to sound fully composed. "What time should I be there?"
"I won't be able to leave here until afternoon. Allowing for air traffic, then time to make sure my guy knows what I want done—is six-thirty too late?"
She felt instant relief. "Six-thirty's fine. " That meant she could keep herself busy all day, and it meant that she'd only have to worry about entertaining Spencer on Sunday. On Monday morning, she'd be back at work.
"Drive right around to Hangar C, " he instructed, "and give a honk to let me know you're there. See you then. "
"Okay. 'Bye. "
He looked unfairly dashing. He was wearing a navy shirt with the cuffs rolled and the tails out, and khaki shorts that left his long legs bare to his deck shoes. He had a worn-looking duffel thrown over his shoulder and a bulging briefcase under his arm, and might have been mistaken for a weekending yuppie if it hadn't been for the carved lines of his face. They were bold and lent him an untamed look, upheld by his scar, his dark tan and his even darker, windblown hair. And then there were his eyes, always his eyes.
With a helpless sigh and more than a flutter inside, Jenna waved and waited while he crossed the tarmac to where the Jaguar was parked. She half expected him to come to the driver's side and shoo her over. Instead he opened the passenger door, tossed his gear into the back and slid in.
"Sorry, " he muttered, and stared out the front. "The goddamn mechanic forgot I'd called, and he took off for the weekend. His partner was there, but he doesn't know his ass from his elbow. He's not touching my plane. "
"So what will you do?"
"Mac'll be back on Monday. He'll have to do the work then. " He looked at her. "Have you been waiting long?"
"Five minutes. It was nothing. " She couldn't take her eyes from his. They were as intense as ever, yet distracted. "You look tired. Was it a difficult flight?"
"The flight was okay. It was everything I had to do beforehand. My editor doesn't like my latest manuscript and wants major revisions. That news came in the mail yesterday—the bastard couldn't tell me in person. I spent most of the afternoon on the phone with him. We were able to compromise on some of the stuff, but there's still a hell of a lot to be done. I'll have to work on it here. "
Jenna couldn't believe her luck. She'd been granted a reprieve in the entertainment department. "That's fine. You can work in my office at home. There's a huge desk and good light. " She would bend over backward to be accommodating. "Do you need a computer?"
He made a disparaging sound. "I can barely type, let alone use a computer. "
She was amazed. Spencer always had such a capable air about him that she had assumed he was proficient in just about everything.
"Don't look at me that way, " he told her. "I've been on the go since I was twenty-two, and computers only came in big after that. When would I have the time to learn to use one? I've always done just fine paying a typist. " He scowled. "But let me tell you, revisions are a pain in the butt. "
"When do they have to be done?"
"Last week. "
"Oops. "
His scowl faded. "Yeah. Oops. " His mouth curved into a lopsided smile, and his eyes did focus on her then. They seemed suddenly warmer, then warmer still and filled with sexual innuendo.
Jenna tore her gaze away, only to have it land on his legs, which were nearly as compelling.
"Problem with the shorts?" he asked. "I'll have you know that in the middle of all that garbage with my editor, I kept thinking about what to wear today. Totally aside from the fact that it's summer and the plane can get warm, I thought it'd be good for you to see my legs so they won't be such a shock later on. "
She forced herself to look more casually at the appendages in question. They were well formed, firm and long, as tanned as his face but hairy. "I've seen men's legs before. In fact, I've seen yours before. "
He frowned. "When?"
"The summer between college and business school. Don't you remember? Caroline and I were traveling through the Greek islands. You met us on Crete. "
"Oh, yeah, " he said with a smile that spread over his face as memory returned. "I made you call home first thing, because neither of you had bothered to call the parents and they were frantic—which I knew because I'd had the misfortune to call home about something else entirely, and they let me have it like I was the one who was lost!"
"We weren't lost. We just couldn't get to a phone. "
He snickered. "I've used that excuse too many times myself to buy it. You did
n't want to call home. But, hey—" he raised a forgiving hand "—I can understand that. It was the first time you'd been away alone. The freedom you felt was heady. "
Jenna smiled at the memory. "It was that" She took a breath. "Anyway, you spent a couple of days with us, mostly at the beach. So I've seen your legs. "
"You've seen a lot more if you were at the beach with me. "
"You were wearing a bathing suit. "
"Not much of one, if I correctly remember those days. "
He did. His bathing suit had been small and sleek. Jenna remembered admiring him in it, but that was all she'd done. He was Caroline's elder brother, twenty-eight to her twenty-two, and though they came from similar backgrounds, he lived such a different life from Jenna that she never dreamed there might be any entanglement between them.
There certainly was now, and those long, tanned, hair-spattered legs made her all the more aware of it. She cleared her throat. "Yes. Well. " Praying that driving would distract her from his imposing presence, she started the car. "Do you want to go back to the house and drop your things off?"
"I'd rather eat. I'm starved. " He was scanning the stores and businesses that lined the road. "There used to be a terrific steak place around here—Terry's, Carrie's—"
"Corey's?"
"That's it. Is it still open?"
"Uh-huh. Want to go?"
"A-S-A-P. "
In less than ten minutes, they were at the restaurant, but it was nearly forty minutes before they were seated and another forty minutes before their food arrived. Jenna saw the expectant looks Spencer sent their waitress and waited for him to explode at the delay the way some other men would have. But he didn't. He shifted in his seat and went through two baskets of rolls, but he didn't complain about the wait Instead, he kept Jenna talking about McCue's, about people they both knew, about Caroline and the kids.
When the food arrived, he ate his own, plus half of what Jenna left on her plate. "I need all the energy I can get, " he explained with a mischievous look.
"Spencer, " she complained.
"What?"
"That's embarrassing. "
"Sorry. I couldn't resist. "
Wiping the smugness from his face, he finished eating. Jenna arched a brow when he refused dessert, but they both had coffee, and when the waitress brought the check, she reached for it first.
Spencer's hand flattened hers to the table. With his other hand, he pulled the check free. "I pay. "
"That's not right You're here on my account I want to pay. "
"I pay, " he repeated in such a firm voice that she backed off. More gently, almost distractedly as he pulled out his charge card, he added, "Besides, I ate twice as much as you. "
Not wanting to risk another reference to why that was so, Jenna sat silently while he settled the bill. It was dark outside by the time they returned to the car.
The darkness did nothing to ease her nerves. Spencer had said they would do it at night, and it was night Jenna couldn't forget that for a minute during the drive to Little Compton. Hands tight at ten and two on the wheel, she kept picturing her house, picturing the bed she had freshened up for Spencer, then picturing her own bed and wondering which one they would use.
Spencer seemed deep in thought, as well. Once, passing beneath a streetlight, she saw that he had his elbow braced on the door and his forehead braced on his fingertips, and for an instant, she worried that he was changing his mind.
"Everything okay?" she asked.
"Yeah. "
She hesitated, then said, "You sound angry. "
"Not angry. " He was silent for a minute. Then he sighed, dropped his hand to his thigh and looked out the windshield. "Unsure. "
Her heart beat harder against her ribs. "Unsure about whether you want to go ahead with it?"
"Unsure about how to go ahead with it I've seduced women plenty of times, but you don't want to be seduced. You want this to be businesslike. I've never done it that way. "
On a ray of hope, she said, "Y'know, we could still do it my way. I'm sure my doctor would be willing to meet us in his office tomorrow—"
"Forget it, " Spencer stated. He didn't have to elaborate. The finality of his tone said it all.
Jenna knew better than to ignore the message. Yes, she wished they were doing it her way, but still, Spencer was doing her a huge favor. He was helping her make a baby. A baby. She couldn't forget that
"It shouldn't be difficult, " she said in a deferential tone. If he didn't know what to do, it was really the blind leading the blind. "We both know the mechanics. Isn't that enough?"
He didn't answer. In fact, he didn't say anything for the rest of the drive, which saddened Jenna. Always in the past when she'd been with him, talk had been easy. She loved hearing about his travels, his adventures, his books, and as though sensing her interest, he relaxed in the telling. But the air between them was tense now. She had the awful thought mat their relationship might be permanently changed, and prayed that wouldn't be so.
When she pulled up at the house, he grabbed his gear from the back seat and followed her in. She wavered for an instant in the hall before saying, "I'll uh, show you to your room. You may want to unpack. " She led him up the stairs and down the hall. The room she had chosen for him was nearly as large as her own, though at the opposite end of the house. At the door, she moved aside to let him pass.
He went in, dropped his things on the bed and stood with his hands on his hips and his back to her. His spine was straight, his displeasure evident.
"If you don't like this room... " she began, only to stop when he turned quickly. His face was dark, his eyes iridescent as they held her in their thrall.
"I think we should do it now, since neither of us will relax till it's done. I need a shower. I'll meet you in your room in ten minutes, okay?"
Jenna knew he was right. The longer they put it off, the more nervous she would be, and she was plenty nervous already. At his words, she had started to shake. It was all she could do not to let it show.
"Fifteen minutes, " she bargained, then swallowed and explained, "It takes me longer. In the shower. "
"Fifteen minutes, " he agreed. His eyes held hers for a heart-stopping moment more before letting her go.
Spencer took his time in the shower. Long after he had soaped himself from head to toe, he stood with the hot spray concentrated on the tight muscles at the back of his neck. True, the mess with the manuscript had gotten him down, but he suspected that he might have handled it better if Jenna hadn't been weighing heavy on his mind.
No artificial insemination, he had told her with such smugness. It's the real thing or nothing. Such arrogance. Sexual intercourse, between you and me. Such cocksureness, and why the hell not? He was a handsome guy. He was a super lover. He would show little Jenna McCue the time of her life, and she'd get the baby she wanted, to boot.
He had believed all that up until several days earlier, when the reality of what he had arranged had hit him—and it wasn't the baby part that bothered him, as much as the Jenna part. She was Caroline's best friend, and he had always liked her. She was gentle and understanding. She accepted his way of life. She was also vulnerable where men were concerned, something he hadn't realized until she had put her proposal to him at his parents' anniversary party.
He wasn't used to vulnerable women, any more than he was used to petite women. He was used to women who were tall and shapely, who reveled in their sexuality, who came to him with confidence and hunger, and demanded as much as they gave.
Jenna wasn't like those women at all, but now he felt a responsibility for her. He wanted to please her, but he wasn't sure how best to do it. She wanted their coming together to be a simple, straightforward coupling for the sole purpose of producing a child. His body wanted more.
He shifted to put the force of the spray on the small of his back, then raised first one arm, then the other to stretch his muscles. He supposed he could find a compromise. He could be gentle, without d
welling on preliminaries. He could make her feel good if she let him. The question was whether she would.
Turning the water off, he reached for the towel and dried himself. He looked at his foggy reflection in the mirror, pushed his hair around a hole, took a toothbrush from his grooming kit and set about brushing his teeth, and all the while he pictured Jenna in her own bathroom getting ready for him. By the time he'd rinsed his mouth, a slow heat was gathering between his legs.
No, getting it up wouldn't be a problem. Preparing Jenna to take it in might be.
He glanced at his watch. It was time. Knotting a dry towel around his waist, he left the bathroom and headed down the hall. Jenna's was the only other room lit. He assumed it had once been her parents' room, but he wasn't thinking about her parents when he came to stand at the door. A single low light glowed by the turned-down bed. She was beside it, with her back to him. She was wearing a robe that was long and white, and her head was bowed. Only when he came closer did he see that she was studying something in her hand.
"Whatcha got?" he asked softly.
She held up a tiny bracelet made of glass beads interspersed with ones of ivory that spelled out her name. "My parents had this made when I was a baby. I always loved it. If I have a little girl, I want to give her one with her name on it, too. "
Spencer looked at the bracelet for a minute, before his gaze was drawn up to Jenna. Her hair was dark as the night, spilling softly around her face and onto her shoulders. Her skin was moist, her cheeks a pale pink. She smelled of spring flowers and looked incredibly young.
He touched her hair. "I think that sounds like a nice idea. " He ran his fingers through the loose waves.
She tucked her chin lower. The gesture made him feel that much larger beside her and more protective. Gently he took the bracelet from her hand and set it on the table by the bed. While he was there, he switched off the light. "If it were up to me, " he said, straightening close by her side, "I'd leave it on. But I think you'll be more comfortable this way. "
"Yes, " she whispered. "Thank you. "
