It was just where I’d left it. I could barely make out the garden, though was able to spot the hedges from the strings of white fairy lights hanging off them. Even if I couldn’t see a thing I would still stand there and stare out. It was the perfect place to think, to process, and I hoped that my quiet window contemplation might help quell the anxiety pulsing in my throat.
I always felt nervous before a wedding, even when it ran as smoothly as this one was, but this time there was a little extra sprinkled on top. A little extra something called Levi.
A snowflake hit the window and skittered down. I thought I’d imagined it at first, but then another one swept past, and soon there were dozens of them. I thought of Garrick and Val on their walk, but I wasn’t worried. They were probably laughing and dancing in it, hopelessly in love.
I heard soft footsteps behind me. A guest on the way to their room, I supposed. I was surprised when a figure pulled up beside me.
“I wonder if we’re going to get snowed in,” Levi mused.
My heart clenched. I didn’t turn to look at him, knowing I’d be a goner as soon as I did.
“I doubt it,” I said. “I’m going to head to bed. Goodnight.”
I turned on my heel to leave but Levi grasped my arm. “Frankie.”
Swallowing, I met his gaze. “What?”
Jeez, did he have to be so damn good looking? He towered over me, the lines of his face as sharply cut as the lines of his suit. His dark brown eyes searched mine, and then he leaned down and kissed me.
I froze. I wanted to give in. I ached to give in. One brush of his lips over mine and desire pooled thick and hot in my belly, demanding satisfaction.
But the sharp taste of wine danced over my tongue and I knew this wasn’t right.
Levi and I had barely spoken all night, save for the usual polite conversation and things like “pass the salt”. He wasn’t kissing me because he burned for me like I burned for him. He was kissing me because he was wine drunk, horny, and we were both here.
He was kissing me because it was convenient.
I pulled away. Confusion flashed in his eyes, but I turned and made a dash for my room.
“Frankie, wait!” he called after me.
I ignored him, though my feet begged me to stop and go back. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe he did mean it.
I blinked back tears, wondering if there was some way I could expel this hope that was turning me inside out.
It was really starting to get on my nerves.
Chapter 33
Frankie
I pulled the shawl tighter around my shoulders, teeth chattering.
“Frankie, I need you to look a little bit less cold,” Dawn, the photographer, said. “Pretend that you’re on a sunny beach somewhere.”
“Got it,” I replied, forcing down a bout of shivers.
Problem was, we weren’t on a sunny beach. We were on the cold, snow covered patio of the restaurant. It served as a stunning backdrop for photos, but left a little to be desired in terms of climate.
Beside me, Val snickered. “Somebody’s in trouble.”
“I’m freezing my tits off,” I muttered. “Why is she taking so long?”
“You were the one who hired her.”
“Because she takes the best photos in Portland,” I replied. “I never realized her secret was torture.”
“Drama queen,” Levi said under his breath. I nearly missed it, since he was on Garrick’s far side, but Levi’s smirk was all I needed to know he’d uttered the words.
“Okay, smile people,” Dawn called.
I amped the wattage of my smile to a near blinding level. Ignoring the cold was one thing, but ignoring Levi’s cavalier attitude all day was another. Either he was doing a superb job of pretending that last night’s kiss debacle never happened, or he was more drunk than I thought and didn’t remember it. All day he’d been smiling, laughing, goofing off with his family, and treating me like it was business as usual.
I knew he couldn’t have been that drunk. That meant he remembered me rejecting him and for some reason it didn’t bother him, which only made me happier that I did reject him.
I was right.
Levi didn’t have any feelings deeper than lust for me and it hurt like hell. But today was not the day for moping, so I’d been doing my best to act as though nothing was wrong and make sure Val and Garrick had the best day possible.
The ceremony went off without a hitch, and we had all the ingredients for a successful reception as well. If my one issue was the invasion of goosebumps on my skin, I could handle that. Photos would be over soon, and then I could go back inside where it was warm and there was alcohol.
“Okay, you’re all set,” Dawn announced a few minutes later. “I’ll see you inside.”
I all but sprinted inside, leaving Garrick and Val in the dust. They still had to make their grand entrance as man and wife, so they couldn’t be seen in the reception hall yet, but I was free and clear to get in there and start drinking. I wasn’t going to get wasted, but a steady buzz would do me just fine.
I slipped in the doors and set the bar in my sights. There was a long line, but a group of Val’s cousins—Josh not included—were milling at the back of it so I didn’t mind. I made a point of getting to know the guests of any wedding I attended, but over the past couple of days I’d cranked my socialization into overdrive since it made it easier to avoid Levi. There were a few people here that I might even consider friends now.
Just as I started walking to the bar, Levi’s deep baritone stopped me in my tracks. “Frankie.”
I winced. So close.
Turning, I offered up a neutral smile. “Hey, what’s up?”
Oh yeah, that sounded casual.
Levi approached me, looking more serious than he had all day. “Can I talk to you?”
Here it was. I didn’t know what he was going to say but I doubted I would enjoy it. Was it too much to ask for just a few hours of peace from him so I didn’t screw up Val’s wedding?
I scrambled for an excuse. “Actually, I was just going to check on the catering. Sorry.”
I zoomed off in the direction of the kitchen and Levi didn’t stop me. They’d probably have some wine in there I could steal a glass of.
The kitchen was a hive of activity. The queen bee, catering manager Claudia Hines, stood at the far end of the room observing the chaos calmly, calling out directions as she saw fit.
“Hey, Claudia,” I greeted.
“Frankie.”
She was a no-nonsense kind of woman, which made her excellent at her job. Didn’t make her a great conversationalist.
“I came to check and see that everything was going well.”
She nodded. “It is.”
I paused a second, trying to decide if avoiding Levi was worth drawing out the conversation. In the end, I decided it wasn’t.
“Great. I’ll see you out there.”
I left the kitchen by the back door, which led me to the hallway outside of the reception hall. I had about fifteen minutes before Garrick and Val made their entrance, so I leaned against the wall and took a minute to breathe.
Xavier turned the corner with a case of wine on his way to the kitchen. He stopped when he saw me, smiling.
“You look absolutely stunning, Frankie,” he said. “Save a dance for me later?” With a wink, he added, “Or will Levi get upset?”
“Levi?” I said with a bark of a laugh. “I think you’re good in that department.”
“You sure?” He hoisted the case up further. “That man is smitten with you, darling.”
I cocked a quizzical brow. “That sounds like something you couldn’t possibly know.”
Xavier, though obviously struggling under the weight of the wine, appeared unruffled as he spoke. “I’ve seen it a million times. He’s a goner.”
“Oh yeah? Seen it a million times with your sage bartender wisdom?”
He snorted. “I’ve seen it a million times just from being a huma
n and interacting with other humans. Being a bartender doesn’t make you a shrink.” He adjusted the box one more time and nodded at me before going to walk away. “I was wise as hell before I ever touched a tap.”
I watched Xavier go, disappearing into the kitchen, wondering if there was any truth in what he said. There couldn’t be. Xavier was a nice guy and a great listener, but I doubted he could pick up on anything more from Levi than I had.
I shook off these thoughts and refocused on the task at hand. The wedding. Val’s wedding. I needed my head in the game since I wasn’t off the clock yet. I still had my speech to make, and I still had to make sure everything went smoothly for the rest of the evening, though I had all the faith in the world in the hotel staff and the people I’d brought in.
I took a breath and walked down to the reception entrance, slipping around the doorframe and scanning the room for signs of Levi. Nothing. Now that he wasn’t here, I started to wonder what he wanted to talk to me about. Realizing this wasn’t a productive use of my brain power, I went to the DJ and double checked that he had everything he needed for the bride and groom’s entrance.
Afterward, I finally grabbed a glass of wine from the bar and loitered near the head table. One minute before the scheduled entrance, Levi appeared at the other side of the table with a glass of whiskey. He didn’t look at me. Was he mad at me now? Had he been about to say something sweet and I screwed everything up?
Gah! This wasn’t the time or the place for me to stress about this!
Thirty seconds.
I took a sip of my wine that turned into more of a chug. I glanced at Levi. Still nothing.
No. Stop looking.
Ten seconds.
I had just enough time to...what? I didn’t have any time at all. This was Val’s wedding.
“Ladies and gentlemen,” the DJ announced.
And my time was up.
I kept stealing glances at Levi throughout dinner. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t stop wondering what he’d been about to say to me. Xavier had officially ruined me. I’d had a great line of defense before he came along with his stupid observations, and now all the hard work that I’d put into being calm and not thinking about Levi had gone down the drain.
I decided to try my best to worry about it later. I had all night to get through, and I could at least put it off until after Val and Garrick’s first dance.
“Ladies and gentlemen, can I get everyone’s attention to the dance floor.”
Speaking of which.
I followed the flow of the crowd, which formed a circle around where Val and Garrick stood holding each other on the lacquered floor. There were hundreds of guests here, but they only had eyes for each other as the music began to play.
I’d never seen either of them smile with so much unfiltered joy and my eyes stung. If I made it through the night without bawling my eyes out, I would be extremely surprised.
Something caught my eye near the DJ booth and I looked over. Levi stood next to the speakers, leaning over to say something into the DJ’s ear. What was he up to? If he wanted to surprise Val and Garrick with something he should have run it past me. The DJ nodded and gave a thumbs up, and Levi stepped down from the platform.
I had half a mind to march up to him right now and demand to know what his game was, but while I was gathering the nerve the crowd swallowed him up. He disappeared.
I decided not to leave the dance floor until I figured out what he’d done.
A couple songs went by without incident. Val and Garrick were still swaying in the middle of the floor, but other couples had joined them and filled in the empty space. I felt like a total weirdo just skulking at the edge of the dance floor, and was about to go back to my seat, when the song ended and the DJ took the mike.
“Alright folks,” he said in a deep, gravelly voice. “This one goes out to Frankie.”
The room filled with cheers and hoots. A preening sense of satisfaction momentarily overrode my confusion, but it soon returned when the sound of a crooning saxophone spilled through the speakers.
I shot a glance over to the stage, wondering if I’d find a saxophone player up there and if I was dreaming. A second later I realized what was happening. The DJ was playing “Careless Whisper”.
What the hell?
“Frankie.”
I spun to face Levi, who stood behind me.
Woah, deja vu much?
“Levi,” I said, blinking. “Hey.”
He extended a hand toward me. “Would you like to dance?”
“Uh, sure.” I said, taking it uncertainly as I tried to figure out what was going on.
Levi led me to the middle of the dance floor, which cleared around us. A few people swayed near the edges of the floor but kept their distance.
Levi took my hand and slid an arm around my waist, pulling me close.
He leaned down to speak in my ear. “I didn’t know how else to get your attention. I need to talk to you.”
“Oh, I didn’t realize.”
He chuckled. “Liar.”
Levi spun me, and when he pulled me back I met his gaze and chewed on my lip.
“What did you want to talk to me about?”
Levi swallowed, and his features flickered with something I’d never seen on him before—nervousness.
“I wanted to tell you that I’m sorry. For everything. I’ve said and done a lot of things that have hurt you. I’ve been pushing people away for so long that I’ve gotten too good at it, and sometimes it seems like it’s my natural state.”
All this for an apology? I didn’t understand it but I certainly wasn’t going to turn it down.
“Apology accepted.”
Levi shook his head. “I’m not finished.” He spun me, just as the song reached the crescendo of the chorus. My chest tightened and pulse raced, eager to hear what else he had to say. Once I was back in his arms, I stared deep into his eyes and waited.
Levi’s lip ticked at the corner. “I love your blog.”
Huh. Not what I was expecting.
He continued. “I love that you have every reason to scowl at love and marriage but you don’t. You don’t scowl at anything, besides me from time to time. You chose to celebrate the same things I let beat me down, and when we first met I couldn’t believe that such a thing was possible and so I didn’t believe in you.”
He let go of my hand and brushed his thumb over my cheek. My heart stopped.
“Frankie, I believe in you now. You’re more real to me than anything I’ve ever known and I want to be with you.” Levi held my gaze, dark eyes swallowing me whole. “I love you.”
The words tumbled from my lips as naturally as breath. “I love you too.”
Levi’s face relaxed into a smile and pressed his lips to mine. They were as sweet as cotton candy.
Chapter 34
Levi
Frankie went in for a second hug and Val laughed, giving her friend an extra squeeze before she released her.
“I can’t believe I won’t see you for three whole weeks,” Frankie moaned. “You’re sure you don’t want to have your honeymoon in Portland? I hear it’s nice and rainy this time of year.”
Val tapped her index finger on her chin. “Hmm. Tempting. I think we’ll stick with Tahiti.”
“Text me when you get to the airport in the morning.”
“Our flight’s at seven,” Val replied. “You’ll probably still be asleep.”
Frankie shook her head. “Don’t care. Text me.”
“Okay, Mom, geez.” Val rolled her eyes playfully. “I’m going to bring you back the tackiest t-shirt you’ve ever seen.”
“You better send me an inappropriate postcard too. Something with nudity.”
Garrick, who’d been hanging by Val’s side and watching the exchange, came to stand beside me while the girls discussed souvenirs. He clapped me on the back.
“You finally made the leap with Frankie,” he said. “Cheesy song choice, but I can respect the gesture
.”
“I refuse to hear style criticisms from a man who packed primarily Hawaiian shirts for his honeymoon.”
Garrick laughed. “You won’t let me wear them to the office. What else am I supposed to do?”
“For the last time, just because they have a collar does not make them business casual.”
“Ah, I’m going to miss you,” Garrick said. “But it’s good to know you won’t be lonely while I’m gone. Frankie’s a great girl.”
Ahead of us, Frankie and Val were enjoying their fourth hug and a smile tugged onto my lips.
“She is, isn’t she?”
Val and Frankie separated and the teary-eyed bride came over to grab her husband’s hand. “Ready?”
Garrick pecked her on the lips. “I’ve been ready for this since the first day we met.”
“I wouldn’t speak so soon,” Val said, wrinkling her nose. “I ate my weight in pasta salad at dinner and I’m not sure you’re going to be able to carry me over the threshold.”
Garrick brushed his fingers over her lips tenderly. “I’ll roll you in.”
“I love you,” Val said.
“I love you too.”
I stepped around them as they started making out and took Frankie into my arms. Her cheeks were pink from a night of dancing and drinking, but her eyes were clear and bright. She rose on her tip toes and kissed my jaw.
“Gross, get a room,” Garrick called.
“Are you still here?” I retorted. “Get out of here. It’s your wedding night.”
He and Val laughed and we all made our final goodbyes. Frankie and Val went in for hug number five. I went for a firm handshake with Garrick, but he pulled me in for a hug instead. They waved to us again at the elevator, and then they were gone.
The lobby was empty besides us, with everyone still partying in the reception hall. After a long night of revelry, the quiet was nice.
“You know,” Frankie said, “I just thought of something.”
I brushed an errant strand of hair out of her eyes. “What’s that?”
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