by J. J. Dorn
“I made a few changes,” he said walking into the massive room. “What do you think?”
“It’s beautiful,” I was dumbfounded.
“I did it for you, Jenna.” He turned to face me. “I don’t want you to be haunted by the memories of this room any longer.”
“I don’t know what to say, Jamieson.” I was in complete shock. He had done all of this just to make me feel more at ease and I must say it worked. The stunning bright room was heavenly. It no longer reminded me of the bad memories that surrounded me and Jamieson.
“Say that you will stay the night with me, Jenna,” he said boldly.
My head snapped around to look at him but what I saw there I was unprepared for. His eyes were heavy and full of need.
“I…uh…I don’t know.” I fidgeted nervously.
He closed the distance between us and drew me to him. “Please, Jenna I just need to be near you tonight.”
“Okay,” I conceded before I could really think it over.
“Thank you,” he said kissing my forehead.
He released me and I climbed into the massive white fluffy bed. Jamieson walked around to the other side of the bed and removed his shirt and sweats leaving only his boxers on.
“Okay, I didn’t agree to that.” I tried not to stare at his gorgeous body.
“You didn’t have to. It’s just part of the deal.” He grinned at me as he climbed in the bed, pulling me close.
I sunk back against him breathing in his intoxicating cologne. He clutched me closer draping his large arm around me.
“I have missed you, baby,” he whispered into the crook of my neck driving me mad.
“Mmmm…hmmm…” I wiggled my butt closer to him. My resolve was starting to crack and I knew this time I would let it break completely.
I let out a hungry sigh showing my desire for him.
“Fuck it,” He growled flipping me on my back and crouching over me. “I’m done pretending. I need you now, Jenna.”
“Then take me,” I gave him the permission he was desperately seeking.
That is all it took and he ripped open my button-up pajama top exposing my bare chest. He didn’t move immediately he just stared at me for a few seconds, watching me. Then he lightly ran his hand down over my bare breasts making me shudder.
“God you are beautiful, Jenna.” He bent down to kiss my breasts.
I moaned in appreciation and pushed forward allowing him better access. Jamieson took his time though kissing and caressing, making me want more. I had missed this. Jamieson had always been able to drive me completely mad.
I began to try to shimmy out of my pajama bottoms when Jamieson reached down yanking them off in one swift movement. I wasn’t wearing panties so I was completely bare.
Jamieson’s eyes went heavy with hunger and he moved lower down my body. He slipped a hand in between my legs urging them apart. I complied granting him the access he desired. I felt his hot mouth roam over my navel and I tensed in anticipation of where he was headed. He moved my thighs gently apart and settled in between my legs. I felt like I was on the edge of losing it but I knew I hadn’t even come close to that precipice yet.
Jamieson kissed my thighs lightly as he gently ran a finger down my hot center. I moaned in response to his touch. He merely grinned at me before driving his tongue deep into me.
I writhed in pleasure as Jamieson was unrelenting in his pursuit of my pleasure. It didn’t take long and I came for him. I thought maybe that would satisfy him slightly but it didn’t. He stalked up my body like he was hunting prey.
“You have no idea how much I have missed that, baby.”
“I want you, Jamieson.” I blurted out. I wanted Jamieson and I wanted him right that instant.
He reached inside the drawer of the bedside table next to me and I knew he was grabbing a condom. He pulled down his boxers and rolled the condom in place. I watched mesmerized by his nakedness.
“Are you sure Jenna, because this is your last chance to run.” He balanced his weight above me on one arm.
“Yes,” I said closing my eyes tightly.
He cupped my chin with his free hand. “You have to look at me, baby. That is the only way.”
I opened my eyes slowly to be met with his navy eyes intently waiting for me. I watched as something flashed in them and he thrust forward into me. I gasped in shock at his shocking intrusion but he quickly began moving us in rhythm making me forget any initial pain.
He set a slow lazy pace at first, gradually thrusting deep inside of me. I wanted more and let him know by clawing my nails down his back. The thing I had always loved about sex with Jamieson was that he didn’t hold back. He pushed me to my limits and then demanded more. But for some reason he was holding back.
“Jamieson please…” I pleaded nipping his shoulder playfully.
He replied by grabbing both my arms and pulling them above my head pinning me there.
“Is this what you want? Is this what you crave?” he growled in my ear thrusting hard deep into me.
“Yessss. Oh God, yes!” I moaned.
Jamieson groaned in appreciation pounding into me over and over until I lost it. I came hard underneath him and he followed collapsing on top of me.
I wrapped my arms tightly around him holding him close.
“I missed you,” I whispered into the darkness of the room.
“I missed you more,” he said and I could tell he was smiling.
After a long while he tucked me back in against his side. I could tell he was starting to drift off to sleep so I mustered the courage to say one last thing to him while our emotions were still raw and hanging in darkness.
“Please don’t hurt me, Jamieson. I can’t take it, not again.” My voice was barely a whisper and I was unsure I even truly said it out loud until he reached over and brushed my long blonde hair away from my cheek.
“I will do my best, Jenna, I will do my best.”
It wasn’t exactly the promise I was hoping for, but at least he knew I was scared of being hurt again. I was taking a huge risk and I knew it. I wasn’t naïve in that fact. I was offering up my heart yet again on silver platter. My only hope is that he had changed enough to not repeat the past.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
July 4, 2013…
“Yes, I’ll be there at 6:30,” I told Cain over the phone as I waited in line at Starbucks for my iced coffee.
His parents were having a huge Fourth of July party in Mobile so I was driving down to join him. They had a gorgeous house on the water and I’m sure it would have a fantastic view of the fireworks show. I was a bit bummed I wouldn’t be celebrating with Audrey and Livy. Audrey had recently broken up with Brad, the med school guy. The long distance thing wasn’t really working for them and Brad was exceedingly busy at school. At first Audrey seemed devastated, but now I was pretty sure she was bouncing back just fine. The girls were going to the fireworks show on the Tennessee River which I was sure would be super fun. I was a bit jealous. I was happy to spend time with Cain, but I wasn’t thrilled at spending the weekend with his family, especially his sister.
“Jenna?” I heard my name and turned around to see who was calling me.
As soon as I scanned the coffee shop I immediately saw who had said my name. A grinning Ethan Wellington smiled mischievously back at me.
“Hi Ethan,” I greeted him, leaving my spot in line and walking over to his table.
“Long time no -see,” he commented, still smiling at me. “You living here now?”
“Yes I moved back a couple of months ago.”
He however lost focus on our conversation and stared passed me. I turned expecting to see a long legged blonde or something similar he was tracking, but much to my surprise the person Ethan had been watching was most definitely not a girl, it was his brother.
“Jamieson,” I said in half question, half statement.
“Hello Jenna,” he greeted me quietly as he approached.
Ethan watche
d us intently and smiled slyly. “Well this reunion has been lovely but I think I will be taking my leave now. James, I’ll be in the car when you’re ready.”
“What are you doing here?” I demanded.
“I live here,” he offered simply.
“But I thought you moved to London.” I was still confused.
“I did but I moved back a little over a year ago.”
“Oh,” is all I could say in return. I was in shock that he was actually sitting in this coffee shop talking to me. It had been so long since I had last seen him. It was surreal now being near him.
“I hear you’re living here again too,” he said lightly not looking at me directly.
“Yes, I moved back after graduation.” The minute the word graduation hit my lips I remembered his gift, the diamond pendent. I had tried to mail it to him but it was returned.
“Congratulations by the way.” He stared at me coldly.
“I got your gift.”
This caught his attention and he finally looked at me again. “Good.”
“I can’t accept it,” I told stoically.
“You already have.”
His response pissed me off. “I tried to send it back but it was returned.”
“I know that.” What a dick.
“Well then you know I don’t want it.”
“So don’t keep it,” he suggested.
“Give me your address and I will mail it to you.”
“I don’t want it back, Jenna, it was a gift to you. Do what you would like with it.”
“Fine,” I spat at him turning to leave.
“Jenna…” he called after me.
“What?” I spun back around.
“I hope you’re happy,” he said with honesty in his eyes.
“And if I’m not?” I don’t really know why I said that to him. It wasn’t as if I was unhappy, it was more that I didn’t understand why he would care either way.
He took a deep breath and stood up clutching my arm tightly. “Then I promise you I will do everything in my power to make sure you will be.”
I scanned his face looking for answers to why he would say something like that, but he gave nothing away. I shrugged out of grasp and glared at him.
“Yeah right, like you care.” I stormed out forgetting my coffee.
“What do you mean you saw Jamieson?” Audrey exclaimed.
“I saw him at the coffee shop near my house this morning,” I repeated into the phone as I drove to the coast.
“Oh no. What did you do? Did you talk to him?” she inquired.
“Yeah. I saw his brother, Ethan first and thought he was alone so I walked over to his table to talk to him. Out of nowhere, Jamieson showed up. It was so bad Audrey. I’m so upset right now,” I confessed to her.
“It’s going to be okay. We just need to talk it out,” she reassured me.
“Okay.”
“So what did he say?”
“He was just being his nonchalant self. Apparently he moved back to Huntsville a while ago. I told him I tried to send back the necklace he gave me for graduation and he said he knew. I told him I would give it to him but he refused it. He said for me to just do whatever I wanted with it.”
“Oh geez, he’s living here now? That is definitely trouble.”
“Audrey! You are supposed to be helping me not giving me more anxiety,” I scolded her.
“Sorry! Okay, well how did you feel when you saw him? Were you disgusted?”
I thought about it for a minute before answering her. “I wasn’t disgusted. I thought I would be if I saw him again. I thought I would be so angry but I wasn’t. I was upset for sure, but I mainly just felt confused.”
“What were you confused about?” Audrey asked digging deeper into my feelings.
I hesitated. I didn’t want to totally confess to her but I knew Audrey wouldn’t judge me, she would just listen. Just one of the many reasons I loved her so much.
“I was confused because seeing him I was excited. When I saw him I felt all of those old feelings instantly but then I remembered what he had done, how bad he hurt me,” I confessed.
“Did they go away when you remembered he broke your heart?”
“No my excitement to see him just turned to disappointment, but I still felt something for him even though I didn’t want to.”
“Oh Jenna…” Audrey sighed.
“I don’t want to have feelings for him. I know I should hate him. I know he broke my heart. I know I can never trust him again. Plus I’m happy with Cain. Cain is what I need. He’s sweet and we make sense, way more sense than Jamieson and I ever did.”
“Jenna, if Cain isn’t the one, don’t try to force him to be.”
“I know, Audrey and I promise you I won’t force anything. I do love Cain though. He treats me well and he’s what I need. I would be lucky if he was the one,” I assured her.
“Alright, just remember I support you no matter what.”
“Thanks friend. I need to let you go, I’m almost to Cain’s,” I said before we said our final goodbyes.
I needed to just digest everything that had happened earlier. I switched the radio on and rocked out to the cool ramblings of the Arkells.
“I’m so glad you are here, sweetheart.” Cain clutched me close to him on the dock.
I had made it to Mobile in record time and spent the day enjoying a BBQ at his parents’ house. Most of the guests at the party were his parents’ friends with only a few of Cain’s fraternity brothers and a few friends of his sisters friends.
“I’m glad to be here.” I smiled at him.
It was dark and we were waiting for the big fireworks show to start any minute. Most of the party was scattered on the lawn and back patio. Cain and I walked down to the dock to have some privacy.
“You look beautiful tonight,” he whispered into my ear just as the fireworks show began over the water.
I watched intently as the bright lights streamed across the sky in intricate patterns. I was mesmerized watching the beauty above me.
“I have a question to ask you, Jenna,” Cain said beside me clearing his throat.
I looked over at him and he was down on one knee next to me. My heart dropped into the pit of my stomach and then began to race out of my chest.
“Jenna Estelle Middleton, will you marry me?” Holy shit I can’t believe he’s proposing?
I stood completely still. I tried to get my brain to process what was happening but it couldn’t. I knew I wanted to be a wife. I wanted to share my life with someone and commit to that person forever. And I knew Cain loved me and I loved him. So I did what I thought made sense.
“Yes!” I exclaimed hugging him tightly and at that exact moment Jamieson Wellington’s face flashed before my eyes. I should have realized then that even my subconscious was trying to tell me what a monumental mistake I was about to make.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
“Jamieson stop!” I squealed trying to duck away from his grasp. “I need to finish my makeup.”
“Fine,” he grumbled and left the huge master bath to enter his walk-in closet.
Since the night of our date weeks ago I have stayed in his room every night. Things had quickly gone from taking it slow to hot and heavy in one night. I tried at first to back away and put some distance between us, but Jamieson refused to let that happen. He was relentless until my barriers completely fell away. I guess I could lie and say that I was upset about that fact, but the truth was I wasn’t. Jamieson and I had found our way back to each other and we were blissfully happy.
“What are your plans today? Are you riding?” he inquired.
I still hadn’t found a job yet; instead I decided to help my sister more permanently at the farm until the baby was born. I was disappointed I was still completely shut out of my career, but on the other hand I was really enjoying riding full time. I knew I wouldn’t be doing it forever but for the time being it was just what I needed.
“No I have today of
f, but I did agree to Sunday dinner at my sisters.” I told him.
“Do you want me to go with you?” he asked peeking his head around the corner of the bathroom.
“No I think it’s best if we ease my family into this.”
I did want to bring Jamieson with me, but the problem was that I wasn’t sure how his presence would be received by my family yet. They knew I was living with him of course and I had recently told them that we were working on our relationship, but I hadn’t exactly come out and said we were together again. I planned on talking to them about that tonight.
“You know I can handle your family, Jenna. It’s my mess to clean up. I wish you would at least give me the opportunity to try to fix things.”
“I know just let me prepare them first, okay?”
“Alright,” he replied glumly and went back to the massive walk-in closet.
I instantly felt bad about hurting his feelings. I wasn’t trying to hurt him, I just needed more time before I brought him around my family again.
I followed him into the walk-in closet.
“I’m sorry,” I apologized wrapping my arms around him from behind.
He patted my arms on his chest with his own. “Nothing to be sorry for baby. This is just more fall-out from my mistakes.”
I leaned my forehead gently against his back hugging him tightly to me.
“Can I take you somewhere today?” He asked in an upbeat tone clearly trying to change the mood.
“Where?” I asked curiously.
“It’s a surprise. I have something I want to show you.” He spun me around to face him.
I was only in my bra and panties and I could tell he appreciated my choice of outfit for the morning. His eyes were hooded with lust. I leaned forward to kiss him and he met my lips with a frenzy.
We kissed for a few minutes before he broke free from my hold. “Go get dressed. Wear something somewhat warm; we will be taking the Ducati.” He said swatting me on the butt for encouragement.
I yipped in response and ran to my room to change my clothes. I was excited to find out what Jamieson wanted to show me.
