by Jane Austen
But this was immediately declined. “No, my dear Tom, upon no account in the world shall you stir a step on any business of mine. Your ankle wants rest. I see by the position of your foot that you have used it too much already. No, I shall go about my house-taking directly. Our dinner is not ordered till six and by that time I hope to have completed it. It is now only half past four.As to seeing me again today, I cannot answer for it. The others will be at the hotel all the evening and delighted to see you at any time but as soon as I get back I shall hear what Arthur has done about our own lodgings, and probably the moment dinner is over shall be out again on business relative to them, for we hope to get into some lodgings or other and be settled after breakfast tomorrow. I have not much confidence in poor Arthur’s skill for lodging-taking, but he seemed to like the commission.”
“I think you are doing too much,” said Mr. Parker. “You will knock yourself out.You should not move again after dinner.”
“No, indeed you should not,” cried his wife,“for dinner is such a mere name with you all that it can do you no good. I know what your appetites are.”
“My appetite is very much mended, I assure you, lately. I have been taking some bitters of my own decocting, which have done wonders. Susan never eats, I grant you and just at present I shall want nothing. I never eat for about a week after a journey. But as for Arthur, he is only too much disposed for food. We are often obliged to check him.”
“But you have not told me anything of the other family coming to Sanditon,” said Mr. Parker as he walked with her to the door of the house. “The Camberwell Seminary. Have we a good chance of them?”
“Oh, certain. Quite certain. I had forgotten them for the moment. But I had a letter three days ago from my friend Mrs. Charles Dupuis which assured me of Camberwell. Camberwell will be here to a certainty, and very soon.That good woman, I do not know her name, not being so wealthy and independent as Mrs. Griffiths, can travel and choose for herself. I will tell you how I got at her. Mrs. Charles Dupuis lives almost next door to a lady, who has a relation lately settled at Clapham, who actually attends the seminary and gives lessons on eloquence and belles lettres to some of the girls. I got this man a hare from one of Sidney’s friends and he recommended Sanditon. Without my appearing however Mrs. Charles Dupuis managed it all.”
CHAPTER 9
It was not a week since Miss Diana Parker had been told by her feelings that the sea air would probably, in her present state, be the death of her; and now she was at Sanditon, intending to make some stay and without appearing to have the slightest recollection of having written or felt any such thing. It was impossible for Charlotte not to suspect a good deal of fancy in such an extraordinary state of health. Disorders and recoveries so very much out of the common way seemed more like the amusement of eager minds in want of employment than of actual afflictions and relief.
The Parkers were no doubt a family of imagination and quick feelings, and while the eldest brother found vent for his superfluity of sensation as a projector, the sisters were perhaps driven to dissipate theirs in the invention of odd complaints.The whole of their mental vivacity was evidently not so employed, part was laid out in a zeal for being useful. It would seem that they must either be very busy for the good of others or else extremely ill themselves. Some natural delicacy of constitution, in fact, with an unfortunate turn for medicine, especially quack medicine, had given them an early tendency at various times to various disorders.The rest of their sufferings were from fancy, the love of distinction and the love of the wonderful. They had charitable hearts and many amiable feelings but a spirit of restless activity and the glory of doing more than anybody else had their share in every exertion of benevolence and there was vanity in all they did, as well as in all they endured.
Mr. and Mrs. Parker spent a great part of the evening at the hotel but Charlotte had only two or three views of Miss Diana posting over the down after a house for this lady whom she had never seen and who had never employed her. She was not made acquainted with the others till the following day when, being removed into lodgings and all the party continuing quite well, their brother and sister and herself were entreated to drink tea with them.They were in one of the Terrace houses and she found them arranged for the evening in a small neat drawing room with a beautiful view of the sea if they had chosen it. But though it had been a very fair English summer day, not only was there no open window, but the sofa and the table and the establishment in general was all at the other end of the room by a brisk fire. Miss Parker, whom, remembering the three teeth drawn in one day, Charlotte approached with a peculiar degree of respectful compassion, was not very unlike her sister in person or manner, though more thin and worn by illness and medicine, more relaxed in air and more subdued in voice. She talked, however, the whole evening as incessantly as Diana and, excepting that she sat with salts in her hand, took drops two or three times from one out of several vials already at home on the mantelpiece and made a great many odd faces and contortions, Charlotte could perceive no symptoms of illness which she, in the boldness of her own good health, would not have undertaken to cure by putting out the fire, opening the window, and disposing of the drops and the salts by means of one or the other.
She had had considerable curiosity to see Mr.Arthur Parker and having fancied him a very puny, delicate-looking young man, materially the smallest of a not very robust family, was astonished to find him quite as tall as his brother and a great deal stouter, broad made and lusty, and with no other look of an invalid than a sodden complexion. Diana was evidently the chief of the family, principal mover and actor. She had been on her feet the whole morning, on Mrs. Griffiths’s business or their own, and was still the most alert of the three. Susan had only superintended their final removal from the hotel, bringing two heavy boxes herself, and Arthur had found the air so cold that he had merely walked from one house to the other as nimbly as he could, and boasted much of sitting by the fire till he had cooked up a very good one.
Diana, whose exercise had been too domestic to admit of calculation but who, by her own account, had not once sat down during the space of seven hours, confessed herself a little tired. She had been too successful, however, for much fatigue for not only had she, by walking and talking down a thousand difficulties, at last secured a proper house at eight guineas per week for Mrs. Griffiths, she had also opened so many treaties with cooks, housemaids, washerwomen, and bathing women that Mrs. Griffiths would have little more to do on her arrival than to wave her hand and collect them around her for choice. Her concluding effort in the cause had been a few polite lines of information to Mrs. Griffiths herself, time not allowing for the circuitous train of intelligence which had been hitherto kept up and she was now regaling in the delight of opening the first trenches of an acquaintance with such a powerful discharge of unexpected obligation.
Mr. and Mrs. Parker and Charlotte had seen two post chaises crossing the down to the hotel as they were setting off, a joyful sight and full of speculation.The Miss Parkers and Arthur had also seen something; they could distinguish from their window that there was an arrival at the hotel, but not its amount.Their visitors answered for two hack chaises. Could it be the Camberwell Seminary? No, no. Had there been a third carriage perhaps it might, but it was very generally agreed that two hack chaises could never contain a seminary. Mr. Parker was confident of another new family. When they were all finally seated, after some removals to look at the sea and the hotel, Charlotte’s place was by Arthur, who was sitting next to the fire with a degree of enjoyment which gave a good deal of merit to his civility in wishing her to take his chair.There was nothing dubious in her manner of declining it and he sat down again with much satisfaction. She drew back her chair to have all the advantage of his person as a screen and was very thankful for every inch of back and shoulders beyond her preconceived idea. Arthur was heavy in eye as well as figure but by no means indisposed to talk and while the other four were chiefly engaged together, he evidently felt it
no penance to have a fine young woman next to him, requiring, in common politeness, some attention, as his brother, who felt the decided want of some motive for action, some powerful object of animation for him, observed with considerable pleasure. Such was the influence of youth and bloom that he began even to make a sort of apology for having a fire.
“We should not have had one at home,” said he,“but the sea air is always damp. I am not afraid of anything so much as damp.”
“I am so fortunate,” said Charlotte, “as never to know whether the air is damp or dry. It has always some property that is wholesome and invigorating to me.”
“I like the air too, as well as anybody can,” replied Arthur. “I am very fond of standing at an open window when there is no wind. But, unluckily, a damp air does not like me. It gives me the rheumatism. You are not rheumatic, I suppose?”
“Not at all.”
“That’s a great blessing. But perhaps you are nervous?”
“No, I believe not. I have no idea that I am.”
“I am very nervous.To say the truth, nerves are the worst part of my complaints in my opinion. My sisters think me bilious, but I doubt it.”
“You are quite in the right to doubt it as long as you possibly can, I am sure.”
“If I were bilious,” he continued, “you know, wine would disagree with me, but it always does me good.The more wine I drink, in moderation, the better I am. I am always best of an evening. If you had seen me today before dinner, you would have thought me a very poor creature.”
Charlotte could believe it. She kept her countenance, however, and said,“As far as l can understand what nervous complaints are, I have a great idea of the efficacy of air and exercise for them, daily, regular exercise, and I should recommend rather more of it to you than I suspect you are in the habit of taking.”
“Oh, I am very fond of exercise myself,” he replied,“and I mean to walk a great deal while I am here, if the weather is temperate. I shall be out every morning before breakfast and take several turns upon the Terrace, and you will often see me at Trafalgar House.”
“But you do not call a walk to Trafalgar House much exercise?”
“Not as to mere distance, but the hill is so steep! Walking up that hill, in the middle of the day, would throw me into such a perspiration!You would see me all in a bath by the time I got there! I am very subject to perspiration, and there cannot be a surer sign of nervousness.”
They were now advancing so deep in physics that Charlotte viewed the entrance of the servant with the tea things as a very fortunate interruption. It produced a great and immediate change. The young man’s attentions were instantly lost. He took his own cocoa from the tray, which seemed provided with almost as many teapots as there were persons in company, Miss Parker drinking one sort of herb tea and Miss Diana another, and turning completely to the fire, sat coddling and cooking it to his own satisfaction and toasting some slices of bread, brought up ready-prepared in the toast rack and till it was all done, she heard nothing of his voice but the murmuring of a few broken sentences of self-approbation and success. When his toils were over, however, he moved back his chair into as gallant a line as ever, and proved that he had not been working only for himself by his earnest invitation to her to take both cocoa and toast. She was already helped to tea, which surprised him, so totally self-engrossed had he been. “I thought I should have been in time,” said he, “but cocoa takes a great deal of boiling.”
“I am much obliged to you,” replied Charlotte.“But I prefer tea.”
“Then I will help myself,” said he.“A large dish of rather weak cocoa every evening agrees with me better than anything.”
It struck her, however, as he poured out this rather weak cocoa, that it came forth in a very fine, dark-colored stream and at the same moment, his sisters both crying out,“Oh,Arthur, you get your cocoa stronger and stronger every evening,” with Arthur’s somewhat conscious reply of “’Tis rather stronger than it should be tonight,” convinced her that Arthur was by no means so fond of being starved as they could desire or as he felt proper himself. He was certainly very happy to turn the conversation on dry toast and hear no more of his sisters. “I hope you will eat some of this toast,” said he. “I reckon myself a very good toaster. I never burn my toasts, I never put them too near the fire at first. And yet, you see, there is not a corner but what is well browned. I hope you like dry toast.”
“With a reasonable quantity of butter spread over it, very much,” said Charlotte,“but not otherwise.”
“No more do I,” said he, exceedingly pleased. “We think quite alike there. So far from dry toast being wholesome, I think it a very bad thing for the stomach. Without a little butter to soften it, it hurts the coats of the stomach. I am sure it does. I will have the pleasure of spreading some for you directly, and afterward I will spread some for myself. Very bad indeed for the coats of the stomach but there is no convincing some people. It irritates and acts like a nutmeg grater.” He could not get command of the butter, however, without a struggle, his sisters accusing him of eating a great deal too much and declaring he was not to be trusted, and he maintaining that he only ate enough to secure the coats of his stomach, and besides, he only wanted it now for Miss Heywood. Such a plea must prevail. He got the butter and spread away for her with an accuracy of judgment which at least delighted himself. But when her toast was done and he took his own in hand, Charlotte could hardly contain herself as she saw him watching his sisters while he scrupulously scraped off almost as much butter as he put on, and then seizing an odd moment for adding a great dab just before it went into his mouth.
Certainly, Mr. Arthur Parker’s enjoyments in invalidism were very different from his sisters, by no means so spiritualized. A good deal of earthy dross hung about him. Charlotte could not but suspect him of adopting that line of life principally for the indulgence of an indolent temper, and to be determined on having no disorders but such as called for warm rooms and good nourishment. In one particular, however, she soon found that he had caught something from them.
“What!” said he. “Do you venture upon two dishes of strong green tea in one evening? What nerves you must have! How I envy you. Now, if I were to swallow only one such dish, what do you think its effect would be upon me?”
“Keep you awake perhaps all night,” replied Charlotte, meaning to overthrow his attempts at surprise by the grandeur of her own conceptions.
“Oh, if that were all!” he exclaimed. “No. It acts on me like poison and would entirely take away the use of my right side before I had swallowed it five minutes. It sounds almost incredible, but it has happened to me so often that I cannot doubt it.The use of my right side is entirely taken away for several hours!”
“It sounds rather odd to be sure,” answered Charlotte coolly, “but I daresay it would be proved to be the simplest thing in the world by those who have studied right sides and green tea scientifically and thoroughly understand all the possibilities of their action on each other.”
Soon after tea, a letter was brought to Miss Diana Parker from the hotel. “From Mrs. Charles Dupuis,” said she, “some private hand,” and having read a few lines, exclaimed aloud, “Well, this is very extraordinary! Very extraordinary indeed! That both should have the same name.Two Mrs. Griffiths! This is a letter of recommendation and introduction to me of the lady from Camberwell and her name happens to be Griffiths too.” A few more lines, however, and the color rushed into her cheeks and with much perturbation, she added, “The oddest thing that ever was! A Miss Lambe too! A young West Indian of large fortune. But it cannot be the same. Impossible that it should be the same.”
She read the letter aloud for comfort. It was merely to introduce the bearer, Mrs. Griffiths from Camberwell, and the three young ladies under her care to Miss Diana Parker’s notice. Mrs. Griffiths, being a stranger at Sanditon, was anxious for a respectable introduction; and Mrs. Charles Dupuis, therefore, at the instance of the intermediate friend, provided her
with this letter, knowing that she could not do her dear Diana a greater kindness than by giving her the means of being useful.“Mrs. Griffiths’s chief solicitude would be for the accommodation and comfort of one of the young ladies under her care, a Miss Lambe, a young West Indian of large fortune in delicate health,” read Diana. It was very strange! Very remarkable! Very extraordinary! But they were all agreed in determining it to be impossible that there should not be two families; such a totally distinct set of people as were concerned in the reports of each made that matter quite certain.There must be two families. Impossible to be otherwise. “Impossible” and “Impossible” were repeated over and over again with great fervor. An accidental resemblance of names and circumstances, however striking at first, involved nothing really incredible and so it was settled. Miss Diana herself derived an immediate advantage to counterbalance her perplexity. She must put her shawl over her shoulders and be running about again.Tired as she was, she must instantly repair to the hotel to investigate the truth and offer her services.
CHAPTER 10
It would not do. Not all that the whole Parker race could say among themselves could produce a happier catastrophe than that the family from Surrey and the family from Camberwell were one and the same.The rich West Indians and the young ladies’ seminary had all entered Sanditon in those two hack chaises. The Mrs. Griffiths who, in her friend Mrs. Darling’s hands, had wavered as to coming and been unequal to the journey, was the very same Mrs. Griffiths whose plans were at the same period (under another representation) perfectly decided, and who was without fears or difficulties. All that had the appearance of incongruity in the reports of the two might very fairly be placed to the account of the vanity, the ignorance, or the blunders of the many engaged in the cause by the vigilance and caution of Miss Diana Parker. Her intimate friends must be officious like herself; and the subject had supplied letters and extracts and messages enough to make everything appear what it was not.