by Tiana Laveen
“Maaan, what tha hell is wrong wit’ you? I’m tryna give you a Muck City official welcome.” Maize threw up his hands. “We was just chillin’ a minute ago. You was into my skills ’nd shit. You defensive as a mothafucka.”
“I don’t trust anybody from here, all right? It’s been nothin’ but bullshit from the minute I pulled up. That’s what’s wrong with me, Maize. I feel like I’m in some war zone. I hear sirens every fucking night, can’t sleep, and then have to fight at school all the damn time over bullshit. Not once have any of these fuckers beat my ass. I’ve earned my stripes, I’m no pussy, but they keep coming and now here you come, up to some sneaky shit, too! That’s what’s wrong with me!” Tony hollered, his frustration boiling over.
“Hey!” the lunch monitor called out. “Keep it down!” Tony ignored the man and continued on.
“I’m tired, just tryna get through school and get the fuck outta here. Fuckin’ hellhole… this shit isn’t normal. Nothing about this place makes sense and I’m sorry if you can’t handle what I’m sayin’ to you, but it’s the fuckin’ truth.”
“Who said that it was normal?” Maize looked at him quizzically as he prosed the question. “Ain’t shit normal about the thangs we’ve seen and been through. That’s the truth, straight up. We’re a forgotten place… don’t nobody give uh fuck about us. You see President Ronald Reagan comin’ over here to help a mothafucka out? No, you don’t. The news like to talk about this place, but nobody does shit about it. Nobody cares. Bunch of meetings about cleaning up Belle Glade. Talk is cheap.”
“You might have plans to leave, but we can’t get outta here…” E.T. piped up, looking reflective and cross at the same time. “Dis home, and no matter how and what it is, we got love fuh it. Welcome to Hells Glade, man. You here now. You ain’t better than us. We was tryna help you make the best of it… thought you was one of us, in your own way, but shit… fuck it. I ain’t never had to beg a mothafucka for shit, ’specially not to help his ass out.”
“Look.” Tony looked at each one of them and no one blinked, twitched, or smiled. He lowered his gaze for a spell. “If you’re being for real, then I’m sorry about my reaction. But look at it from my point of view.” He pointed to his chest. “I have nothing to give you in return.” He shook his head. “Where I’m from, people just don’t come up and do stuff like this out of the blue, after you’ve been tortured and your life has been made a living hell for months on end. It doesn’t make sense.”
“It ain’t been us, so don’t lump us in wit’ that shit and it ain’t out the blue…” Maize turned around and motioned to the crew to give them some time alone. After the cafeteria had emptied of people with the exception of the custodian and lunch monitor, who’d been mean mugging them the entire time, Maize leaned in close, so much he could see the contrast of his skin with the whites of his eyes, the thick black eyebrows on his face, and the small scar on his chin. He smelled a bit like weed, cinnamon gun and was doused in cologne. “Let me talk to you for a second.”
“Guys, lunch is over. You need to get movin’!”
“Dang, Mr. Richards, I know!” Maize barked as he craned his neck in the big man’s direction. “Just gimme five mo’e seconds… I nevah cause you no trouble.”
The squatty man who harassed kids in there all day, every day, was sporting his all too familiar small light blue button-down shirt that looked as if it were going to burst at the seams from being stretched so much across his rotund barrel of a chest. The man grimaced and turned away.
“All right, back to what I was sayin’.” Maize’s eyes narrowed as he looked him up and down. “You had to prove ya self, man.” He took a deep breath. “I got shit going on, shit you might like, shit that might interest you.”
“Like what?”
“Like that’s my business ’til I trust you.”
“But you just said that you—”
“Yeah, I know what you gonna say. I like you, man… think you good people. Trustin’ someone is on a whole ’nother level though. Dis Palm Beach, nigga. My offer stands. If you don’t want it, that’s on you. Oh, and by the way, I ain’t fucked Cassidy if that’s what you worried about. I know you like ’er. I see how you look at her in class. She like kin to me; that would be nasty. If that’s what you want, then go get her… do it…”
And then, Maize grabbed a basketball from a large drum, spun it on the tip of his finger, and walked out into the sunlight…
CHAPTER SIX
And They Call It Puppy Love
Two hours later…
“He cute, I ain’t gone lie.” Danica looked at the back of Tony’s head, her dark pretty eyes turning to slits as she popped her gum and grinned. She rocked her leg back and forth and coughed into her hand. Then coughed again.
“All that weed you smoke and breathe in…” Cassidy teased. “You gonna have fried brain cells by the time you seventeen. That’s only a year from now. You been out sick so much lately.”
“Shut up, square. It’s because of my asthma. I love yo’ borin’ ass anyway. You act like somebody’s mama, Cassidy.”
Cassidy rolled her eyes and tapped the edge of her pencil against the desk. “Somebody gotta act like yo’ mama ’cause you ain’t got no home trainin’.”
“Anyway, back to the White boy. I like his voice, you know? Sound like a mafia gangsta, but I don’t fuck White dudes. That’s just a line I don’t cross.” Cassidy shook her head. “You think his dick little, girl? If it is, yuck. You can’t be White and come up short. That’s a clear violation.”
Cassidy wrinkled her nose at the words spilling forth from Danica’s mouth. They were sitting side by side in Mrs. Hinkle’s math class, whispering back and forth about the guy she found interesting, to say the least.
“I hear talking,” Mrs. Hinkle warned, not looking at them directly.
When the teacher turned back around and began to write on the chalkboard, Danica started up again.
“You thank he say sexy shit in Italian when he havin’ sex? Some ol’ Ragu mess like, ‘Mama Mia, dis pussy good like spaghetti!’”
“Shhh! You stupid. See, you always playin’.”
They both laughed under their breath. She turned back towards the teacher who was explaining The New Deal, but she couldn’t wipe the smile off her face. Cassidy’s cheeks warmed when Tony slowly turned in her direction and looked her way for a moment. Oddly enough, he was sitting next to E.T… that was a first. E.T. had spoken to him a couple of times in class that day. Yeah, strange.
Moments later, the bell rang and they all got up to go. Thoughts of reading after she ate, did homework and cleaned up the living room and her bedroom entered her mind. Cassidy couldn’t wait to get in the house and dive into one of the books she’d gotten from the library. Her newest one was ‘Fine Things’ by Danielle Steel.
She hurried past Tony and E.T. and made her way up the hall, Danica close by her side. The path soon filled with students pouring out from various classrooms, everyone laughing and talking.
“Hey, mothafucka! Watch where you goin’!” someone yelled.
Let me get my ass outta here before somebody start fightin’ again…
Cassidy hastened her steps, Danica falling behind as they made their way farther up the wide aisle. She gasped when she felt an arm wrap around her waist and jerk her close.
“Awww, shit!” Danica cackled.
“I need to talk to you,” Tony said in her ear.
His breath was warm and smelled minty, like spearmint gum. She looked into his bright gray eyes and her stomach flipped. He was so close to her… she felt his warmth, his strength, his courage.
“I’mma go, Cassidy… I’ll call you tonight.” Danica coughed into her fist.
“All right. I’ll be home in a little bit.”
Danica winked in her direction, cradled her bookbag, and swam upstream like all the other fish in the Muck City sea.
“Why’ve you been avoiding me?” Tony blurted out, chewing vigorously on some gum.
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“Avoiding you? I haven’t been avoiding you, Tony.” She swallowed.
“Yeah, you have. You barely speak to me at school. You act different here than at home.” His brows furrowed. “You act like you don’t want to talk to me here… like you’re ashamed of me or somethin’.”
She looked at him for a second, ready to concoct a lie, but decided against it. Tony was not like some of the guys she’d encountered. He came across as much more self-aware, and more mature, too. How could she look the boy in the face and do something like that? Be dishonest at a time like this? He looked downright offended. They began to walk together, side by side.
“I’m not ashamed of you. I didn’t wanna cause you no problems, Tony. That’s why.”
“What kind of problems?”
“See, some of the people here don’t act right. They don’t have good sense. If they saw us being friends and everything, they might feel funny about that and try to do something to you. Then there are some guys here that I ain’t interested in, but they interested in me. If they saw me wit’ you, they’d try to get even, maybe come after both of us.”
“You could have told me that, you know, shared your concerns, because Cassidy, I coulda put your mind at ease. You need to understand that nobody is going to do shit to me and be in good enough shape to talk about it the next day. And if anyone even looks at you wrong, they’ll be blind afterwards once I get finished with them. I’m not a pussy… all right? Don’t be afraid to be good to me out in public. I’d be good to you if the shoe were on the other foot. I’d never make ya feel like that. Don’t worry because I can handle whatever it is for both of us.”
Her heart was thumping hard. All she could do was smile. Her crush on the boy was growing, and so were her worries.
“I hope you’re right, but anyway…” She shrugged. “That’s why, that’s the reason. I’m sorry if I made you mad; it wasn’t my intention. I’m surprised it took you so long to say somethin’ about it, actually.” She laughed nervously as she twirled a piece of her hair between her fingers.
“Yeah.” He took her bookbag and swung it over his shoulder along with his own. “I wanted to say something… but at the same time, I didn’t really want to appear, I don’t know… anyway, glad you told me what the problem was.”
She swallowed as she caught a whiff of his natural scent. Tony always smelled clean, like fresh laundry soap and peppermints. It was sexy in its own special way. They made their way outside into the sunlight, bathed by the rays of warmth.
“You don’t have to hold my bag. it’s not heavy.” She reached for it but Tony pulled away.
“I want to. It’s fine.”
They got onto the sidewalk and headed away from the school, toward home. An uncomfortable silence stretched between them, like static electricity and twisted vines of muted communication desperate to be severed and reconnected. She stuck by him, and he by her, their eyes often meeting, but no words were shared.
“I want you to—”
“I hope that—”
They both laughed as they spoke over one another.
“You go first,” he offered, a big smile on his face. There were those damn dimples again…
“I was going to say that I want you to come to my birthday party next month. My friends will be there. It’ll be at Danica’s house.” She slid her hand in her jeans pocket as they continued on their path.
“I’d love to come.”
“Good… good. You know what? You probably need a tour. Have you been around town, Tony?”
“Not really.” He shrugged. “Not too much to see, is there?”
“Well, I guess to you probably not. I bet New Jersey got all kinds of fun stuff to do. We don’t have no mall or nothin’ like that; gotta catch the bus to get out that way. But have you been to Browns and Dixie Chicken?”
“Heard of Dixie Chicken. Seen it many times. Browns?” His brow rose.
“Yeah, it’s a restaurant. The chicken so good. Not better than my grandmother’s, but it’s a close second.” She chuckled. “Sometimes Grandmama is tired or I tell ’er to rest and I’ll just go get me somethin’ to eat from the store. Always need a backup.”
Her stomach flipped again when he bumped into her ever so slightly and she caught his scent wafting in the wind.
“I’ll have to check that out then. Brown’s, huh?”
“Yeah… so, uh, how’s your family? I never see your brother hardly anymore. What’s his name again?”
“Dante. Yeah, he works a lot but one job is just temporary… coming to an end. He has a long commute to his first job since it’s not in Belle Glade.”
“I ain’t think so. Ain’t no work here; nothin’ to make any decent money… people out here hustlin’ and stealin’. That’s their work, you know? Not everybody bad here… plenty of good people too. I look to them for inspiration, try to not fall into the wrong thing, like Grandmama warns. It’s hard though. Sometimes being how I am is real difficult.”
They kept on walking, and he brushed his fingers against hers, then grabbed her hand and held it. Her heart beat so hard in her chest, she thought it was going to explode. After a while, he let go. She wished he hadn’t.
“You got dreams of gettin’ out of here someday, Cassidy?”
She paused and stood there looking at him. He slowed once he noticed she’d stopped walking.
“Yeah, I do, but I keep it to myself.”
“Like a secret?” They began to walk again.
“I suppose. I don’t wanna say nothin’ and jinx it.”
“Oh, okay. You know what though? Sometimes, if you tell just one person, someone you can trust, it’s like writing it in the sky so God can hear.”
She cocked her head to the side and burst out laughing. “You’re full of shit. You just want me to confess.”
“All right, all right!” He laughed loudly. She loved his laugh. It was kind of hoarse. “I’m busted. Tell me though. What you wanna do when you graduate?”
“I want to own a business.”
“What kind of business?” He kicked a pebble and then another one. She observed them skid across a few feet ahead.
“I want to own a magazine company.”
“Wow! I like that!”
“You don’t think it’s silly?” She giggled, then felt silly for giggling.
“No way! What’s silly about that? What kind of magazine would it be?”
“It would have all kinds of stuff, but be geared towards Black people, but like, for opportunities and empowerment. We’d have celebrity interviews, global news, fashion, food and a Want Ad section for jobs and places folks can take their kids to so that the youth can see stuff they don’t see at home… Folks just stay here from birth to death. I don’t want to be one of those people. I figure if kids can see thangs like art, plays, nature, you know, things like that, they may have a fightin’ chance of makin’ somethin’ of themselves.”
“That’s ambitious of you. I really like that… that’s cool.”
“Yeah? Thanks…” She smiled proudly. “Gotta go to school for journalism though and get like a communications degree. I’mma do it. I believe in myself. What about you? What do you want to do when you graduate?”
“Guess.” He smirked.
“Guess?”
“Yeah…”
“Hmm, let’s see. Well, you always fightin’. A boxer?”
“Nah, I don’t like that shit. That’s just something I have to do. Guess again.”
“Mmmm, well, the way you ate that food so fast it must be… a professional eater?” He grimaced but all she could do was burst out laughing. “I don’t know! I give up. What?”
“An animator. I want to illustrate books. Maybe work in movies, maybe a newspaper, you know, doing the funny pages or something along those lines. That’s like my dream.”
“What?! Drawin’? You can draw?”
“Yeah. Check this out.” He plopped his bookbag down on the ground and pulled out a spiral notebook from the
main compartment. He flipped through it, then handed it to her. After he swung his bookbag back over his shoulder, they continued to move, side by side, but it was hard to think… to process what she was seeing.
“Tony! You drew these?!”
“Yeah.” He walked a few steps ahead of her. She couldn’t see his face, but he sounded so damn nonchalant about it. What she was seeing deserved praise and prayer. It was just that good.
She looked at the illustrations, all of them practically bursting off the pages. There was the Incredible Hulk, Superman, Spiderman, Snoopy, Garfield, Inspector Gadget, and a bunch of Smurfs. Some were in black and white, others in full color.
“You are good! I can’t believe this. I mean, I don’t think I’ve ever known anyone who can draw like this, not personally anyway. These look just like the real ones. I wouldn’t be able to tell the difference. How’d you do this? You’re good!”
“Yeah? Glad you like them.”
“You gotta enter a contest or somethin’, Tony. This is crazy!” She flipped more pages. There were wonderful drawings of feathers, trees, and a house she didn’t recognize. Then she turned another page and her hand began to tremble. Her face flushed with heat. She stopped walking dead in her tracks and simply stared.
There, on a slightly wrinkled page, was a black and white sketch drawing of her…
She swallowed and blinked, shocked by it all. He’d gotten every feature down perfectly. It looked like a photograph. She was in awe, mystified, spooked. In the image, she was wearing her favorite pair of earrings. A few strands of her hair fell in her face and she was smiling, or more like laughing. It was like looking into the mirror…
