by P. C. Cast
“My Lady! My sisters and I have carved and quilled arrows which we have bartered to the centaur traders.” A voice came from the crowd.
“Who just spoke?” I yelled.
The women parted to let a tall, slender blonde step through the crowd. I felt my face break into a relieved smile as I recognized her resemblance to our school’s best computer teacher. Now, there was a woman who knew how to organize.
“Your name?”
“Maraid, my Lady.” She performed a cute curtsy.
I turned to one of my ever-present guards. “Send for the centaurs Dougal and Connor. Bring them to this courtyard. Have them instruct the women in what they can do to help support the warriors.” I pointed to Maraid. “This woman, Maraid, will be in charge of organizing the women’s groups.”
The guard saluted and rushed away.
“The centaurs will tell you what they need.” My teacher voice carried through the expectant silence. “By helping them you will help all of us—and I thank you for it.” As an afterthought I added, “Epona’s blessings on all of you.” Then I beat a hasty retreat, with Alanna scurrying after me.
Rushing through the door that led to my private corridor, I breathed a relieved sigh and whispered to Alanna, “Do you think that was okay?”
She nodded, her head tilted toward mine as we hurried to the bathing-room door. “It gave them something to do. If they are kept busy, they have less time to be afraid.”
“That’s what I thought.”
The guard opened the door for us. We stepped into the bathing chamber, and I began stripping off my bloody clothes before Alanna could help.
“Are you certain you should have asked for Dougal, too?” Alanna was handing me a sponge and a bottle of bath soap. I sat on the pool’s ledge and began scrubbing the blood from my body.
“I thought it would be best if he stayed busy.” I submerged myself to rinse away the last of the blood. Alanna had laid a towel near the edge of the pool, and I stepped out of the water, wrapping myself in its softness.
Alanna was rummaging her way through one of the large wardrobes.
“Do you think you can find something that’s not semitransparent and has a top to it?”
“I think you will find this acceptable.”
She was holding a pretty piece of cream-colored material in her hands. I obediently held out my arms and she began her magical wrapping. I was pleased to notice the soft fabric wasn’t see-through. She finished with a flourish and another elaborate pin.
This outfit only showed off a nice expanse of my long legs, which I was used to, and, quite frankly, I enjoyed.
“I like it.” We smiled. I turned back to the vanity and rummaged quickly through the plethora of jewelry. “The ability to accessorize is what elevates us from lower-life forms,” I said in my lecture voice, choosing a pair of diamond-studded drops for my ears. “Like men.” We shared a smug girlfriend look.
“Now, tell me about Carolan.”
The smug girlfriend look fell off her face and was replaced by a bright flush.
“Jeesh, quit blushing,” I said. Which, of course, only caused her blush to intensify. I took her by the hand and led her to the bench in front of my makeup vanity. Pointing to the spot next to me, I said, “Sit and talk to me.”
She sighed and looked into my steady gaze. And sighed again.
“Want me to help you?” She nodded. “You’re in love with him.”
Her eyes widened. She looked like Bambi.
“How did you—” I put up my hand to shush her.
“I’d like to say it’s because of my wonderfully intuitive mind—or even because it’s some kind of Beloved of the Goddess thing—but the truth is there’s nothing at all mysterious about it.” I smiled and playfully pushed my shoulder into hers. “He’s the mirror image of Suzanna’s husband, Gene.” She blinked in surprise and I kept chattering. “They’ve been married forever and he still adores her like they were newlyweds. It’s really pretty disgusting.”
She was making little mewing noises, so I poured a goblet of wine from my unending supply and handed it to her. She drank deeply as I continued.
“Actually, it’s weird how people mirror themselves—or however the hell I should say it.” I poured myself some wine, too, and briefly contemplated grammatical problems caused by alternative dimensions before continuing. “In my old world Gene is a lawyer and a history professor. Suz and I call him Doctor-Doctor.” I giggled. “She calls herself Mrs. Doctor-Doctor and says that his brains can kick sand in the face of any overmuscled Neanderthal pretty boy.” I chased away the hilarious mental picture of Gene in a Speedo, which Suz’s words never failed to conjure.
“What is a Neanderthal?” Alanna sounded on the edge of confused hysteria.
I frowned at her. “Don’t worry about it. It just means she’s crazy about him, too.” She looked like that explanation helped. “You two aren’t married in this world?”
“No!” She jumped as if the words held an electrical charge.
“Why not?”
Her eyes started to fill with tears.
Oh, great.
“Don’t tell me he doesn’t love you. I saw the way he looked at you out there.”
“He loves me.” Her voice was soft.
Then I remembered that Gene had been married once, briefly, when he was very young, long before he’d met Suzanna.
“Is he married to someone else?” I took her hand, ready to provide best-friend comfort and support.
“No! He loves no one except me.”
“Then what the hell is the problem?”
“You.” Her voice was a whisper.
“Me!” I glowered at her. “You mean that damn Rhiannon—not me.”
“I am sorry. You are right. Rhiannon, and not you.”
“I still don’t understand.”
“Once she discovered our feelings for each other, Rhiannon forbid the marriage. And she forbid the love. She would not let me be alone with him. Ever. She said I belonged to her and no other.” She shrugged her shoulders sadly. “She said when she was finished with my services, Carolan could have me. That he could wait until then.”
I was momentarily speechless.
“And so he has waited,” she finished sadly.
“That selfish bitch.” I shook my head at the absurdity of keeping them apart. “With all the damn men she had, you’d think she’d let you have one!”
“Oh, she would have let me have any other man. Just not Carolan.”
“But you wanted no one except him.”
She shook her head. We both drank our wine. Another thought popped into my head.
“Alanna, you don’t have any children?”
“No, of course not. I have never been married.”
I just stared at her and kept my mouth shut. How could I tell her that in another world she and the man she loves are happily married with three beautiful girls? I couldn’t. Once again I felt the weight of Rhiannon’s decisions hanging heavily on my conscience.
“He must hate me.” I hadn’t realized I’d spoken the words aloud until Alanna nodded slowly in agreement.
I stood abruptly. “Well, this I can fix. Marry him. Today.”
Alanna shot to her feet. “Bu-but there is no time for a ceremony.”
“What has to happen for you guys to get married?”
“A priest or priestess must speak an oath to bind us together.”
“I’m a priestess. Right?”
She blinked like she was starting to understand. “Yes.”
“So I can perform the ceremony,” I said matter-of-factly.
“Yes,” she repeated, looking faint. “But now cannot be the right time—we are readying ourselves for war.”
“Sounds like a perfect time to get married.” I looked hard at her. “You don’t want to wait till after the fighting, do you?”
“No.” I saw fear shadow her eyes.
“Then come on.” I prodded her toward the door. “After thi
s mess with the vampire-things gets cleared up, you can renew your vows.” She wasn’t saying anything, just nodding in a kind of dreamy way. “I’ll throw a big party—it’ll be great.” I hastily decided that being the preacher was probably going to be almost as much fun as being the maid of honor.
We emerged from the bathing room and I paused only long enough to get my bearings. Striding purposefully to my chamber I was humming “Here Comes the Bride” to myself, and enjoying Alanna’s dazed but happy expression. Being the Good Guy is a hell of a lot more fun than being the Bad Guy (something John Wayne certainly knew).
The maid who looked like Staci was just finishing supervising the laying out of my breakfast table. Smelling the enticing aroma of some kind of honeyed hot cereal made my stomach growl. I gave her an appreciative grin and remembered to call her Tarah. She surprised me by responding sluggishly, and she walked a little unsteadily as she left the room.
“You think the girls have been drinking too much?” I asked Alanna after the servants departed.
“What?”
“Never mind.” She had that dazed expression still plastered on her glowing face, and I didn’t think she’d heard anything I’d just said. And, anyway, sometimes wine creeps up on a girl (purely by accident). I was a real bitch to even mention it.
“Come on, eat something before you fall over.”
We had just dug into breakfast (well, I’d dug in—Alanna was picking at her porridge) when two sharp raps sounded against my door.
“Come on in!” I yelled though a mouthful of sweet mush (it tasted kind of like oatmeal, only wilder—if that makes any sense).
My guards held open the doors and ClanFintan, followed by Carolan, entered the room. I had meant to watch Alanna’s blushing reaction to her soon-to-be husband’s entrance, but I found myself having what I liked to think of as a Star Trek Moment. ClanFintan’s presence caught me like he was a big ol’ black wormhole in space, and I was a little shuttle-craft. For you unknowing civilians, that meant he sucked me to him like a Hoover.
“Hi!” I sounded like friggin’ Gidget.
He took my hand in his and raised my palm to his lips in a gesture that was becoming as familiar as it was intimate.
“Hello.” His voice wrapped around me and made me shiver.
After his kiss, my fingers laced with his and he stroked my wrist slowly with his thumb.
“How is Dougal?”
A grimace of pain moved across his face. “It is not yet real to him.” He shook his head sadly. “He and Ian were seldom separated. It will be difficult for him to bear.” Then he squeezed my hand and said, “I hear you are keeping him busy. That was wise—it will give him less time for thought.”
“I’m glad you’re not upset with me for ordering around Dougal and Connor.” I smiled into his eyes, and the rest of the world melted away. Really, and don’t knock it till you’ve tried it.
Alanna cleared her throat and I remembered I wasn’t a character in a book (sigh). I looked around ClanFintan’s large body and saw that Carolan was standing quietly by the door, his eyes watching me warily. It was disconcerting to have a man who I would normally be friendly with treat me with such suspicion, so I decided that I would use the same tactic with him I had used with Alanna. I’d just act like myself and let him catch up—so to speak.
“Carolan, come on in.” I smiled warmly as his eyes narrowed. “We need your expertise.”
Alanna was sitting on one chaise facing me, and I was sitting on the other. ClanFintan had stopped within reach of the food (and of me). Carolan moved slowly to join us and I gestured in the direction of Alanna’s chaise.
“Have a seat. Are you hungry?”
He halted next to the table, not looking at Alanna. “I would rather stand, Lady Rhiannon,” he said stiffly. “And, no, I have broken my fast.”
I shrugged. “Whatever, but we might be here for a while, so feel free to sit and pour yourself some wine. After all, grapes are my favorite breakfast fruit.”
He was studying me like he thought I was a bomb getting ready to explode.
ClanFintan tugged on one of my curls. “You just like wine,” he said as he looked pointedly at my half-empty goblet.
“It’s medicinal,” I teased up at him and playfully batted at his hand. Then I shot Carolan another smile, and asked in a conspirator’s voice, “Am I right, Mr. Healer?”
“It has been called the nectar of life,” he answered slowly.
“See!” I said to ClanFintan and he hurmphed at me. Turning to Alanna, I announced, “Then we’ll have to make sure we have lots of wine at your formal wedding ceremony.”
If possible, my words caused her to flush an even brighter shade of pink. But my words had the opposite effect on Carolan—his face blanched a horrible shade between white and gray; for a moment I worried that he would need a mortician instead of a priestess. Then he spoke through tightly clenched teeth. I felt ClanFintan stir at the obvious loathing in his words.
“Lady Rhiannon, I have known you capable of many hurtful acts, but this—” As his voice raised and his body began to tremble with repressed violence, ClanFintan dropped my hand and stepped protectively forward.
“Have a care what you say to my Lady, Healer.” His voice was like death.
“If you knew what she really was, you would not defend her!” Carolan spat at the floor in my direction.
Alanna and I were on our feet as ClanFintan lunged forward so quickly that his large body was only a blur. Before I could say anything to stop him, he had forced Carolan to his knees.
“Ask her forgiveness,” he growled.
“No!” I yelled as I pulled on ClanFintan’s steel-like arm, trying to get him to loosen his grip. “It’s me who is sorry. I should have explained better—I just didn’t think.” ClanFintan looked confused, but he loosed his hold on Carolan, allowing him to stand.
Alanna was beside me, and I quickly grabbed one of her hands. Then, before he could spit at me again or anything, I grabbed one of Carolan’s hands and placed hers in his.
“You’re the one she’s going to marry—today. You should never have been kept apart.” I looked apologetically over his shoulder at my still ruffled husband and said, “I guess I wasn’t very clear about that before, but I really didn’t expect him to freak out.”
Then I shifted my attention back to the almost newlyweds. Carolan’s eyes were wide (and his mouth was kind of flapping open, but I thought it’d be rude to mention it). I nodded my head up and down and gave him an “it’s true” look. He glanced at Alanna as if he was afraid she would turn into something horrible (in this world, you never knew), and as her misty smile of happiness registered in his mind, I heard him suck in a great gulp of air.
Before he could go all crazy again (and have my husband accidentally break something he might need later—like his neck), I put both of my hands over their joined ones, and jumped right in there with a makeshift wedding oath borrowed from Longfellow. “There is nothing holier in this life of ours than the first consciousness of love—the first fluttering of its silken wings—the first rising sound and breath of that wind which is so soon to sweep through the soul.”
I squeezed their hands before letting go.
“I would say that now I’ve joined you, but I know that really you were joined long before today. So instead, let’s just say I’ve finally made it official.” I looked at Carolan’s shocked face and continued, “Cherish her always.” Then I stepped back and gave them a big smile. “Now you may kiss the bride!” What a great line.
But instead of kissing Alanna, Carolan dropped her hand and caught my eyes with his penetrating gaze.
“Who are you?”
CHAPTER 20
I opened my mouth to answer, but Carolan cut me off.
“No! Do not try to disguise the truth with twisted words. I know Rhiannon. I have spent endless years hating her. I know her true nature is that of a spoiled, selfish child.”
Alanna’s sudden intake of breath ma
de him turn to her. His face gentled.
“You know it is true, love.” He touched her cheek in a lingering caress. “She rewarded your loyalty and sacrifice with jealousy and spite.”
He turned back to me. His face had lost the wariness of before—now he just looked curious and pleased.
“I ask again, who are you? How could this happen?” He was studying me with a doctor’s eye. “Physically you appear amazingly like her.”
Well, I’d always known Gene was too smart for my own good.
He stepped closer to me, and I noticed that this time ClanFintan didn’t move to stop him. Actually, the centaur had become very still. He was watching me with the same analytical eyes Carolan was using. Only he didn’t appear very happy.
“Your hair may be a little shorter.” He barked a quick laugh. “And your speech patterns are certainly odd. But you are remarkably similar.”
“Carolan, you are mistaken!” Alanna suddenly interrupted, not giving him time to say anything else.
This time I did the silencing.
“Let him finish, Alanna,” I said firmly.
Carolan looked into my eyes again. “You are not Rhiannon. You may be Epona’s Chosen, but you are not Rhiannon. When I look into your eyes I do not see my old enemy. You do not have the evil within you that she had.”
I looked at Alanna’s worried face and sighed. “I can’t do this anymore,” I said to her. My eyes sought ClanFintan’s. “I don’t want to lie to you anymore.”
He didn’t make any motion or sound. His face had become the guarded mask I had struggled against when we had first met.
But I couldn’t take back what I had said. And, truthfully, I didn’t want to. I’m me, and I was tired of being mistaken for some other bitch.
