by P. C. Cast
“Well, uh, it’s an Epona thing.” And I made myself very busy with unbraiding and washing my hair, hoping she wouldn’t press the point.
Two quick knocks sounded against the door.
“Come in—” I glanced at my very naked bathing partner and added “—if you’re not a male.” Girlfriend or no girlfriend, I wasn’t about to let my husband come in here and fill his eyes full of buxom naked centaur.
I mean, please, I am an English teacher. Some things just aren’t acceptable.
Alanna breezed through the door, arms loaded down with clothes and a large jug of what I desperately hoped was wine.
“Hi, Alanna!” Seeing her familiar face made me realize how much I’d missed her today.
“Rhea!” She smiled her sweet Alanna smile at me and rushed forward to empty her arms of stuff, nodding pleasantly at Victoria.
“Alanna, meet Victoria, Lead Huntress of Centaurs.”
“It is an honor to meet you, Mistress.”
“Alanna is my best friend—proof of that lies in the fact that I’d bet my coronet that jug is filled with my favorite red wine.”
As I spoke, Alanna was pouring me a goblet of red magic and placing it on the ledge next to me.
“Any red wine is your favorite red wine.”
“Any dark, dry red wine—I have my standards,” I quipped as I took a quick swallow.
Alanna, always Ms. Manners, was already pouring a second cup for Victoria. “Please join us, Mistress,” she said politely as she handed the wine to the centaur.
Victoria gratefully accepted the cup, and I watched as Alanna began to pick up my dirty clothing—
“Stop!” I screamed and jumped up, spraying water and wine everywhere. “Don’t touch my clothes!”
Alanna dropped the dirty mess as if she’d been burnt, and stood there looking miserable.
I grabbed her hand and led her over to the waterfall area where clean water bubbled into the pool. Pouring a lavish amount of soup on her hands, I ordered, “Wash—really, really well.”
“I forgot,” she said apologetically.
Mumbling to myself about blondes and best friends, I marched my naked body over to the pile of nasty clothes, picked them up and threw them into the blazing hearth that was built into the far wall. Then I jumped back into the pool and repositioned myself on my ledge. I looked up to find Victoria watching me as if I had suddenly sprouted wings or, worse, a penis.
I took another drink from my goblet, which I was pleased to see still had some wine left in it, before I explained.
“Smallpox is very contagious.”
“I knew that. It is why humans should not tend those who are already ill.”
“It’s more than just tending the ill that spreads the disease—the blankets, clothes, cups, anything someone has gotten—” I searched for the right words “—body fluids on, can spread the disease just as surely as if the person were standing there.”
“That I did not know.” Her keen eyes searched mine. “This is something your Goddess has revealed to you?”
“Yes,” I said, glancing sideways at Alanna, who was still scrubbing her hands as she watched me.
She acknowledged my worried look by reiterating, “The Goddess reveals many things to Rhea.”
Victoria looked satisfied with the divine-intervention explanation, and went back to washing her hair while she talked. “It has been said that you are taunting the leader of the Fomorians and drawing them into our trap.”
“Yeah—” I attacked my hair, too “—and it isn’t much fun.”
“I have found that there is only one compensation for dealing with great evil.” She paused and I waited expectantly for her to continue. “It teaches great lessons.”
She spoke with such profound sadness that I suddenly wanted very much to ask what had happened to her—I wondered what horrible lesson evil had taught her.
Instead, I said, “I wonder what lesson it will teach me.”
Into the silence the two knocks on the door seemed to echo.
“What?!” I yelled in my most annoyed-teacher voice.
“Rhea?” My husband sounded uncharacteristically tentative as the door opened a crack. I could see the reflection of the candles glimmer in his eyes as he tried to peer into the room. “May I enter?”
“No!” I screeched. “Victoria doesn’t have a damn thing on!”
He paused, holding the door open a little farther than a crack, and I could hear his amused snort. “I grew up with Victoria. I have seen her bathing many times.”
“I don’t care how many times you’ve seen how many zillions of gorgeous naked centaurs before we were married.” I was still yelling as I jumped out of the pool and sped to towel dry my body while I made shooing motions at him. “From now on you don’t get to see any naked females except me—centaur or not.”
I could hear his laughter, and I could see the door was still cracked open.
“Unless you want me leering at my guards while they bathe!”
The door slammed quickly closed. I continued drying myself, mumbling something about this not being the Playboy Mansion, so we were certainly not bunnies on display.
A noise from the pool made me look, just in time to see Victoria explode in laughter as she surged from the pool and shook water all over the room.
I noticed that Alanna (my supposed best friend) had plopped down on her butt and was joining the centaur in a big belly laugh.
“What’s so damn funny?” I asked as I wrapped my wet hair in a towel, turban style.
“You and ClanFintan!” Victoria said between her ringing laughter.
“What about us?”
“You are jealous!”
“So?”
Alanna was laughing so hard she snorted. I shot her a look and said, “I don’t know what you’re laughing at, Ms. Newlywed.” She tried to sober her expression, but only succeeded in causing her eyes to tear with suppressed laughter.
“Lady Rhea,” Victoria hiccuped as her laughter subsided, “do not be offended. It was just so unusual to see the woman I have heard so many—” she stopped, clearly choosing to discard several offensive words “—tales about showing such obvious affection for her mate.”
I frowned and continued to dry myself.
“And then to see ClanFintan’s equally jealous reaction—it was just so unexpected.”
“Why?” All ears, I waited for inside ClanFintan info.
Alanna had herself back under control, and she was able to hunt up an extra towel for the centaur. Victoria talked as she dried herself (Alanna poured more wine for all of us—God bless her, I forgave her momentary hysteria).
“ClanFintan has long been pursued by females, centaur and human. He has always reacted with the same polite indifference.”
She saw that she had my full attention.
“I am not saying he has been disinterested in females, he has just never let his heart become involved.” Her lovely smile lit up her face. “It is quite obvious his heart is now involved.”
“Much to his chagrin,” Alanna piped in, and they started giggling all over again. This time I joined them.
“I did not mean to offend you with my laughter. It was motivated by joy not ridicule. I saw earlier that he cared for you, and you him. I just now understand the extent of your relationship. You are in love.”
I heard Alanna sigh romantically. I would have puked if it hadn’t been so true.
“Yes.” I was sure that goofy grin was back on my face.
“I wish you joy. He is an exceptional centaur.”
I searched her eyes for dissembling or any hint of anything that wasn’t true and honest, and found no evidence that she was anything but forthright and sincere.
“Thank you, Vic.” We grinned at each other, well satisfied with our new friendship.
“I brought this for you, Mistress Victoria.” Alanna handed the centaur a brilliant blue, silky piece of material.
Victoria fingered it carefully, and lo
oked at Alanna with a questioning gaze.
Alanna smiled at her. “I can show you how to secure it.”
“Let her,” I said. “She’s really good at wrapping that stuff around a body.”
“It is quite lovely.” She sounded wistful. I recognized the voice of a fellow clothes lover.
“Mistress, I must ask you to kneel so that I can reach around you.”
Before she complied, the Huntress gave Alanna a stern look. “Only if you stop calling me Mistress. I am Victoria to my friends.”
Alanna smiled and Victoria dropped gracefully to her knees. I watched, fascinated by the wrapping and weaving of what looked like nothing but a long, pretty scarf. After just a few twists and turns, Alanna had morphed it into a sexy top that left just enough of Victoria bared to draw second and third looks without getting her arrested. Victoria stood and trotted (literally) to the full-length mirror.
“It is beautiful!” She moved her body around so she could admire her entirely too sexy reflection. Then she grinned mischievously at me and said, “Be careful, Rhea, that I don’t tempt Alanna away from you. Once my Huntresses see this, they will implore me to find a way to coax her from you.”
I gulped and tried not to look worried.
“Victoria, it is an easy skill to learn. I will simply teach your Huntresses how to wrap the fabric.” Alanna’s sweet voice put my fears to rest.
And a great idea came to me—why not gift the Huntresses with lots of beautiful cloth when they leave? (Note to self: remember to set the present up with Alanna.)
“Here is yours, Rhea.” Alanna handed me a silky buttercup-colored nightshirt. It was cut with a deep V in the front, and cascaded in delicate folds to the floor. Almost see-through but not quite. I didn’t have to look in the mirror to know how erotically it outlined my breasts and hips. Alanna certainly knew what she was doing.
“It’s gorgeous. Thank you, my friend.” I gave her a quick hug before I started hunting through the large selection of combs and brushes for a thick-toothed comb that I thought would suit Victoria’s platinum masses. Finding one I thought would work well, I handed it to the Huntress. Then I grabbed my own and smiled at my two friends.
“If you’ll excuse me, I think I’ll take my comb to my room and work it through my hair there.”
“Rhea, I can dress your hair for you.” Alanna sounded confused as she looked skeptically at the towel turban I still had wrapped around my hair.
“Don’t worry about it. I’m sure Carolan will be coming to find you soon. You should make sure he has a good dinner, and dessert.” As I said the last word, I gave her a suggestive look that made her cheeks flush.
“And you have dessert of your own waiting in your chambers.” Victoria gave me a knowing look.
And I felt my own cheeks turn pink.
“Good night, you two,” I said as I escaped out the door. Their giggles made me want to break into a chorus of “Young Love.” But, well, I seriously can’t sing, so I just hummed internally while I walked down the hall.
The adorable guards snapped to as I approached.
“My Lady, Lord ClanFintan awaits within,” one of them informed me.
“Good.” I wanted to tweak his sword, but I realized it wouldn’t be appropriate. “Thanks for telling me.” He saluted and opened the door for me.
ClanFintan was reclining on a chaise that sat before a laden and delicious-smelling table. At my entrance his face broke into a welcoming smile.
I couldn’t help myself—like a goofy teenager I rushed into his arms, loving his eager kiss.
“So, you want to leer at your guards as they bathe?” His deep voice was playful, but I heard the serious undertone he tried to hide.
“Only if you want to look at naked Huntresses.” I nibbled at his bottom lip.
“There is only one naked female I wish to look at.” He kissed me slowly.
When I came up for air, I asked. “How many legs does she have?”
His laughter shook his chest as he hugged me against him. “Only two.”
“I’m glad.” We smiled at each other until my stomach growled. Well, actually it roared.
He chuckled. “Eat.”
I swiveled and took up my perch on the chaise next to him. Everything looked so delicious that I decided I would have to try a little bit of every single thing. As I grazed my way across the table, ClanFintan asked me questions about the smallpox patients. He was sorry to hear of the number of dead and newly ill, but we agreed that neither of us was really surprised. After a while my appetite started to slow down, and I could ask my own questions.
“Are the warriors still arriving?”
“Yes.” He sounded pleased. “I believe we may be able to begin moving on Laragon earlier than I had originally anticipated. Do you think Nuada can be convinced to attack the Muses in less time?”
I thought of the expression on the creature’s face as I had taunted him.
“Yes,” I said quietly.
He squeezed my shoulders and said nothing.
Suddenly, the weight of my exhaustion was back. My head felt heavy and all I wanted to do was comb out my hair and sleep. I kissed his cheek and got up, unwinding the towel from my almost dried hair. Situating myself cross-legged on our mattress (I noticed our bed had been made, but it was still on the floor), I started to comb my way through my stubborn hair.
“Let me.” ClanFintan knelt behind me and took the comb from my tired fingers. “Lean back and close your eyes.”
“Mmm.” I felt my body become leaden under his touch. “You have the most wonderful hands.”
I leaned back until I was curled up on my side against a bunch of propped-up pillows. The sensuous feeling of his hands working the comb through my hair made me want to stay awake and enjoy it, and maybe even try and coax him into shape-shifting again tonight, but the stress of the day won, and I felt myself falling into a deep, exhausted sleep.
* * *
Tom Selleck and I were at a wonderful Mexican seafood restaurant somewhere in northern Italy. The margaritas were made with real lime juice and gold tequila, and the white cheese dip was totally calorie free. Tom was just in the middle of explaining to me why he was only attracted to voluptuous women over thirty, when the scene dissolved and I was lifted up through the ceiling and shot out into the clear Partholonian night.
Tonight I didn’t feel like spending any time sightseeing or trying to avoid what I knew I had to face.
“Okay, I’m ready. Let’s get this over with,” I said aloud to the air. I felt my spirit body heave forward, as if I had been thrown out of a slingshot. Familiar landscape blurred beneath me as I rocketed toward the increasingly less distant mountains…
And came to an abrupt halt over the inside courtyard. The scene wasn’t much changed from the previous night. Women were huddled in unnatural silence around smoky campfires, blankets shrouding most of their features. I felt anger begin to build inside me.
“Take me to him,” I whispered through clenched teeth.
My body moved forward toward the part of the castle that I had visited the night before. Through the windows of the uppermost rooms I could see lights blazing and I knew who I would find on the other side of the roof beneath me.
Prepare yourself, Beloved. The words whispered through my mind.
“I’m ready,” I said resolutely, and the bottom dropped from beneath me. I sank through the roof and into Nuada’s chamber.
It took a moment for me to refocus in the bright, overly lit room. The bed was empty, but before I could feel relieved, a movement from across the room caught my attention. My body turned and I felt a shudder of revulsion as I realized what I was witnessing. Nuada was holding a naked young girl in his arms in a sick parody of a lover’s embrace. She was tilted backward, as if they had just danced and he was finishing a romantic dip, but her head was thrown back to the side unnaturally. Nuada’s mouth was pressed firmly against her neck, and as I drifted closer I could see his jaws working in a grinding m
otion as he bit through her skin. Blood welled out of his mouth and began running in a dark stream down her body and to the floor. As he lapped and sucked at the wound, his wings began to rustle, growing taut and erect, spreading up and over him like a giant predatory bird. The girl began to twitch and moan in pain, and the movements of her body allowed me to get a better look at Nuada. He, too, was naked, and it was obvious that his wings weren’t the only things growing and becoming erect.
“Eeww, that is seriously disgusting.” I spat the words.
At the sound of my voice, Nuada’s head shot up and he hissed, “Are you here, female?”
My body drifted forward and, once again, I experienced the shivery feeling that told me I was becoming semivisible.
“I’m right here.” The ghostly sound of my spirit voice echoed off the walls.
Nuada flung the girl to the ground.
“Get out!”
The pale girl scrambled weakly on her hands and knees, and fled out the door. Nuada wiped his bloody mouth with the back of his hand and crouched on his haunches, studying me.
“So, you come to me again.” He sounded self-satisfied.
He made my stomach feel tight and sick.
Draw him to you, Beloved. The words drifted through my mind.
“I came to you because you are not strong enough to come to me.” I cupped one of my breasts suggestively.
His wings twitched and his eyes narrowed.
“It is such a shame that all you can handle are weak, pitiful little girls.” I cupped my other breast and pouted at him.
He licked his lips; his eyes never left my breasts. I let my hands move from caressing my breasts down my body, my fingertips drawing shapes and patterns over my naked ribs, waist and stomach. His eyes stayed locked with the seductive play of my hands, and I could hear his breathing deepen.
“But maybe anything except a helpless little girl would be…” I paused. My hands traveled down to caress my inner thigh, while the other cupped my pubis, much as I had seen him do to the violated girl the night before “…too much for you.”
His breath turned into a hiss as he shot to his feet and lunged forward, reaching clawed and bloody fingers into the air below me.
