He stood there for a moment, watching her shoulders as they moved ever so slightly. He knew she was crying, and he hated that he had inadvertently caused that. He was torn between pretending he didn’t notice and trying, ineptly, to comfort her.
But he was afraid that if he took her into his arms, strictly to comfort her, something of an entirely different nature might result.
However, he couldn’t bring himself to just callously walk out, either. So he plucked a napkin from the napkin holder on the table and handed it to her.
“Thought you might need this,” he murmured as he and Justice left the room.
* * *
Carson and his canine partner made the rounds on the ranch, covering the perimeter outside the mansion first. Urging Justice over to where the would-be kidnapper had jumped from Serena’s balcony, he had the canine carefully survey the entire area, looking for a scent that would lead the dog to find whoever had made the inept attempt.
Justice suddenly became alert, finding a scent and eagerly following it for approximately a quarter of a mile where the scent, from the K-9’s reaction, began to fade. Right next to a set of tire tracks.
Carson cursed under his breath, frustrated. Whoever the kidnapper was, he’d apparently made his escape via some sort of vehicle. Most likely a Jeep from the looks of them, he guessed.
The Jeep had driven onto a gravel road several yards away and that was where both the tire tracks and the scent abruptly ended.
Justice moved around in circles, looking as frustrated as he felt, Carson thought.
“You did your best, Justice,” he told the dog. “But if the guy’s stupid enough to come back, we’ll be ready for him and he can kiss his sorry butt goodbye.”
It occurred to Carson as he continued covering the grounds, looking for another lead or clue, that he was no longer referring to the person who had invaded Serena’s home as “she.”
“How about that?” he muttered to himself.
He supposed that Serena had finally won him over. Despite the necklace and the name written beside his brother’s body, he was beginning to consider that Demi Colton was not behind any of this. Maybe Serena was right.
Maybe someone was trying to frame her.
With Demi out of the running—for now, he qualified—that brought him back to square one and a world full of possible suspects.
Carson dug in.
* * *
He spent the rest of the day questioning ranch hands to see if any of them had heard or seen anything last night that could help him identify who the potential kidnapper was.
As he’d expected, none of the hands had anything in the way of positive information to offer. The one thing he came away with was that they all sounded as if they were eager to help. They all seemed to like Serena.
“Hell, she doesn’t treat us like we’re dirt under her fingernails, like her mama does,” one of the hands, Jake Rowan, confided when he was out of Anders’s earshot.
“She’s fine with working right alongside of us,” Ramon Del Campo, another hand, told Carson. “You need anything to help find whoever took that shot at her, you let us know.”
Carson nodded. For the most part, he’d found that when civilian volunteers got involved, things became more dangerous, not less. But wanting to foster this display of goodwill, he made a point of thanking each of the ranch hands before moving on.
* * *
During the course of the day, while conducting the interviews, Carson also checked in a number of times on Serena. She was working with the horses in the stable and the corral under the watchful eyes of several ranch hands at any one time. It put his mind somewhat at ease about her welfare.
Carson also stopped at the house to make sure that Lora was safe. Alma seemed capable enough, but the housekeeper, although quite sturdy, wouldn’t be a match for anyone who chose to overpower her. Carson directed a couple of the ranch hands to keep watch outside the house, both front and back. They had instructions to fire off a round to get his attention in case someone they didn’t know tried to get into the house.
* * *
Dusk was just setting in and he was bone tired as he walked into the mansion. Serena was in the living room, sitting on the sofa with Lora on her lap.
“So how are you?” Carson asked, crossing over to her.
“Tired. Why?” Serena asked warily. It was obvious that she thought he was about to spring something on her.
Carson shrugged, thinking that maybe he shouldn’t have said anything. But he had had enough of isolating himself the way he’d been doing these last few years. A man shouldn’t have to live like that, he silently argued.
He forced himself to continue. “It’s just that when I left this morning, you seemed kind of upset. I just want you to know that I wasn’t trying to pry.”
He definitely wasn’t the kind to pry, Serena thought. If anything, he was the kind to encourage building up barricades. Barricades kept him safe from making any personal contact.
“I know that,” she said.
Carson forced himself to go on. “I just wanted to rule out the possibility of Lora’s father kidnapping her, either for the ransom or because he just wanted custody of the baby.”
“I know that, too,” she replied quietly. She didn’t want to talk about what amounted to a one-night stand. “Could we change the subject?”
He wasn’t finished yet. “In a minute.”
Annoyed, she asked, “What else do you want to ask me?”
“Right now, nothing,” he answered. “I just felt that since I burrowed into your life, making you uncomfortable, I should tell you something about mine so we’re on equal footing.”
She didn’t quite understand where this was going, but she felt she had to tell him that, “I have no desire to make you feel uncomfortable.”
“Yeah, well, then, maybe I feel that I owe this to you,” he said. This was hard for him, but he felt he needed to share this with someone and if anyone would understand what he’d gone through, it would be Serena. “Just listen, okay?”
“Okay,” she agreed, hoping he wasn’t about to tell her something that she was going to regret hearing. “Talk.”
Chapter 16
Carson thought of sitting down before he spoke, then decided that he would rather be on his feet when he told Serena what he had been keeping to himself for such a long time.
For some inexplicable reason, standing made him feel less vulnerable and more in control of a situation.
The silence began to deepen.
It is now or never, he told himself.
“I was in a relationship—” he began slowly.
“‘Was’ or ‘are’?” Serena wanted to know.
Despite the fact that she was having feelings for him, it occurred to her that she had no idea about Carson’s actual personal life, knew nothing about him at all outside of the fact that he worked for her brother. If Carson had someone in his life, she needed to know now, before anything went any further.
Before her feelings went any deeper.
She’d been blindsided by a good-looking man before and she didn’t intend for that to ever happen to her again. Carson might be here at the mansion for the sole purpose of keeping her and Lora safe, which was quite admirable of him, but that still didn’t mean that the man wasn’t out to further his own personal agenda.
“Was,” Carson told her, stressing the word. “Her name was Lisa,” he added, knowing that Serena, like most women, would want to know that. “We were starting to get really serious when she told me that she was pregnant.”
Haunted by her own memories, Serena’s back automatically went up. “Let me guess, you dropped her like a hot potato.”
“No,” Carson replied, then further surprised her by saying, “I asked her to marry me, but she wouldn’t. Said she needed time so that she cou
ld work some things out.”
“And?” Serena asked, fully expecting Carson to tell her that he then had his own second thoughts and used the time to make his getaway.
“She took a really long time thinking,” he continued stoically, “and while she was doing all this thinking, the baby decided to come early. Lisa went into premature labor.” There was a great deal of emotion brimming in his voice as he told her, even though he was doing his best to keep that emotion at bay. “I didn’t find out until after the fact.”
Serena grew very quiet, waiting for him to finish his story. At this point, she no longer knew what to think or where this was going. All she knew was that he sounded extremely sad.
Carson avoided looking at her. “I got to the hospital just before Lisa died,” he said quietly.
“I’m so sorry.” Moved, Serena reached over and covered his hand with hers in an effort to offer comfort. “And the baby?”
“It was a girl.” His eyes met hers. “She died the next day.”
Serena felt her heart twisting in her chest. For a moment, she couldn’t even breathe. “Carson—”
He shrugged away her pity and whatever condolences she was trying to convey.
“These things happen,” he told her gruffly. “I didn’t tell you this to get your pity. Since you felt I was digging into your life, I wanted to tell you something about mine so that you didn’t feel like you were the only one who was exposed.” He nodded toward the baby. “I think you’d better get her up to her room,” he told her. “She’s asleep.”
“In a moment,” Serena answered.
She rose to her feet and placed Lora in the cradle by the sofa, then walked over to Carson. She had sworn to herself that she had absolutely no time for any meaningless dalliances with men. As far as she was concerned, her life was full just the way it was, with her daughter and her work. Good-looking men were nothing but trouble.
But there was something in Carson Gage’s eyes that not only moved her, it spoke to her.
As he was telling her about his unsuccessful relationship and the newborn who had died, even though he’d tried to turn away, she’d seen indescribable pain in his eyes. That was something that couldn’t be faked.
She found herself pushing aside her own situation, her own barriers, and wanting to comfort him. At least that was what she told herself.
Before she could think it through, she’d moved closer to Carson and in the next heartbeat, she found herself raising her face up to his and kissing him.
Everything became blurry.
She wasn’t even sure if Carson met her halfway or if he had just stood very, very still and allowed her to make the final move.
All she knew was one moment her heart was reaching out to him, the next her mouth was sealed to his.
But while she might have started the kiss, Carson certainly completed it.
His arms went around her, drawing her even closer to him as the kiss deepened to the point that she felt as if she was falling headlong down into a wide, bottomless abyss.
She caught herself clinging to him, trying to keep the room from spinning so fast that she lost her balance. So fast that she lost all perspective.
Carson was the one who ended the kiss, drawing back from her.
She looked at him in dazed surprise.
His pulse was racing faster than the car he’d once taken for a joyride years ago. Part of him, the part that belonged to the reckless teen he’d once been, wanted to take her right here and make love to her. Wanted her so badly, he physically ached.
But he wasn’t that reckless teenager anymore, he was a police detective with responsibilities. That meant that he couldn’t allow his desires, no matter how strong they were, to dictate his behavior.
Taking hold of Serena’s shoulders, he looked into her eyes. “You don’t want to do this,” he told her.
Serena’s heart was hammering so hard, she found that she could hardly breathe. With slow, measured words, she told Carson, “I’m only going to say this once. I’m going to go upstairs to put the baby to bed. After that, I’m going to my room. If you want me, you know where to find me.”
She wasn’t sure exactly how she managed to walk over to the cradle. It almost felt like she was having an out-of-body experience. She could see herself doing it. Her legs felt so wobbly, she was certain she’d collapse on the floor before she got to the baby.
But she didn’t collapse. She made it to the baby’s cradle.
Digging deep for strength, Serena picked Lora up in her arms.
With the sleeping baby cradled in her arms and operating on what amounted to automatic pilot, she went to the staircase and slowly made her way up the stairs. All the while, Serena kept praying for two things: that the baby would go on sleeping and that Carson would come upstairs.
Reaching the nursery, she went in and very gently placed her daughter down in the crib. She stood there for a moment, watching Lora sleep. Then, leaving the door between the two rooms opened just a crack, she tiptoed out again and went into her own bedroom.
Her hands were actually shaking as she shed her clothes and then slipped on a nightgown. It was her favorite nightgown, a soft, light blue garment that looked and felt as if it had been spun out of gossamer angel wings.
She looked down at the nightgown. That’s it, Serena. Play hard to get. You’re going to wind up with gooseflesh, waiting for a man who isn’t going to show up.
Her heart stopped the very moment she heard the light rap on her door. The roof of her mouth felt so dry, she could barely get the two words out.
“Come in.”
The next moment, the door slowly opened and then Carson slipped into the room. He closed the door behind him but made no move to come closer.
Instead, he remained where he was, as if second thoughts had immobilized him.
But he wasn’t having second thoughts. He was looking at Serena. His gaze washed slowly over her. She looked like a vision.
Serena was standing next to her bed. The light she’d left on shone right through her nightgown, leaving very little to the imagination.
His imagination took flight anyway.
Carson had no idea how he didn’t wind up swallowing his own tongue.
“It’s cold tonight. You’re going to wind up freezing to death,” he told her in a voice that was so low, it was hardly audible.
“Not if I find a way to keep warm,” Serena answered him.
Was he going to turn away? Had she made a terrible mistake? She refused to allow her mind to go there.
Her eyes never left Carson’s face, waiting for him to make a move. Praying it was the right one.
And then, because he could resist her for only so long, because he needed what Serena was offering him, needed it not just physically but emotionally as well, he cut the distance between them and swept her up in his arms.
This was wrong and he knew it, but he just couldn’t help himself. “I should have my head examined,” he whispered.
“Later,” she said just before she brought her mouth up to his.
His last ounce of resistance disappeared, evaporating in the heat that had just flared up between them as her body pressed up against his.
Any last efforts he might have put forth to talk her out of what they were about to do vanished, burned away to a crisp as one kiss mushroomed into another.
And another.
It was hard for him to say which of them was more eager for this to happen. Up until now, he’d thought of himself as a tower of restraint. But faced with her eager mouth trailing along his face, his neck, his throat, restraint shattered into more pieces than he could ever possibly count.
When Lisa had died, followed by the death of their daughter, Carson had felt like a man who had been literally gutted. He became merely a shell of a man who was just going through the motions of pret
ending to still be alive. He walked, he talked, he got things done, but he simply didn’t feel.
Not a single thing.
But now, tonight, with Serena in his arms like this, he felt as if he had suddenly been brought back from the dead.
And it felt incredibly wonderful to realize that he was alive.
Carson couldn’t remember stripping off his clothes. There was a vague awareness that Serena had helped, but he couldn’t say that for sure. All he knew was that the clothes had been in his way and he’d got free of them as quickly as possible.
The diaphanous web that Serena’d had on was discarded as well, becoming a shimmering, barely blue heap on the floor next to his clothes.
Then there was nothing left between them except for unresolved passion.
Pulling her against him, Carson exulted in the intoxicating feel of Serena’s bare skin heating against his.
His hands traveled along the length of her body, caressing, stroking, glorying in the softness that had him all but drunk with desire.
He made love to her a hundred different ways, his lips trailing along the curves and swells of her supple form, lingering over her breasts, her hips, working his way slowly down to the very core of her.
When she suddenly gasped and reared, grabbing hold of the comforter beneath her and all but shredding it, Carson lingered longer. He used his tongue, his lips and his very breath to bring her up and over into a climax that had her biting her lip to keep from crying out his name and waking up the baby.
When he moved up along her body again, Serena was all but numb for a moment.
And then, as if suddenly infused by a bolt of sheer energy crafted out of her ecstasy, Serena reversed their positions, straddling him. Working magic she hadn’t known that, until this very moment, she was capable of.
With carefully calculated movements, she teased his body until she managed to bring him close to the brink of fulfillment.
Carson caught her hand, stilling it. Then, with his eyes on hers, he switched their positions again until he was over her.
Colton Baby Rescue Page 14
