I considered every words of his little speech. I knew what he was asking, and even if I wasn’t sure how to respond, I knew I wanted what he wanted. I nodded, giving him my approval.
“Not good enough, Nicole. Tell me,” he demanded.
I took a deep breath. “I want you. I want you to dominate me, Dallas,” I said, giving him the words he needed to hear.
He turned me toward the bed, his bare chest against my back. He leaned down to kiss my ear before whispering in it. “Any time you’re uncomfortable, just tell me to stop.”
I knew the experience was going to be intense, but I never imagined it would be so amazing. Dallas bent me forward, my chest touching the bedspread. He trailed his fingers at the cleft of my ass cheeks, the gentle touch tickling me. I squirmed a little and he stilled me with a firm hand on the small of my back.
“Trust me,” he begged, his voice hoarse.
I nodded as he started to explore me. I was already wet as his fingers delved between my legs. His dick was firmly pressed against my leg and his hips thrust at mine even though we weren’t having sex yet. I wanted nothing more than for him to be inside me, but I knew he wanted to take his time. I closed my eyes and enjoyed his ministrations as he rubbed my clit.
He thrust two fingers deep and I arched up off the bed. His left hand stayed on my back, keeping me pressed down as he knelt. His warm breath tickled my inner thighs and then he was kissing me, his tongue tracing a path from my clit to my inner lips.
My entire body shook as he had his way with me. I wanted more than what he gave, but I didn’t want to ask him; I was far too embarrassed. As if sensing my need, Dallas lightly smacked my ass, eliciting a deep moan from me. In an instant, he was standing, he body looming over mine as his chest touch my back.
“You like that, Nicole?” he asked.
I didn’t answer; I couldn’t. He let his hand meet the flesh of my ass again and I let out another moan. I never imagined I’d be into it, but desire flooded me. If only he’d sink himself into me completely.
“Take what you want, Nicole,” he suggested, his hands on my ass. He rubbed his dick against me and I thrust my hips back against him, moaning when he slipped inside. My breath caught and then he pulled out. “Fuck.” He walked away and I felt like I’d been used. He returned a few seconds later with a condom on and I realized why he was worried. He pushed the broad head of his cock against me and I took him inside again, more than ready to feel all of him.
His dick twitched, rubbing my G-spot and moaned again. “Right there,” I directed him. He moved again and I was so close to coming, I could hardly breathe. “Don’t stop,” I gasped.
He didn’t need any more encouragement as he took me.
Twenty-Five
Dallas
We were both exhausted, but after I cleaned myself up, I brought a bottle of water over to where she lay, curled up on her side.
“Nicole, you need to stay hydrated,” I explained, pushing the bottle toward her lips. She smiled and sipped the water and then handed it back to me before her head hit the pillow again.
Just as I thought, she was far too tired for sex. I felt like the scum of the earth for engaging her. I never should have let it happen, but she was enticing; she seduced me thoroughly. I set the bottle of water on the bedside table and got up, walking over to the window. I stared up at the moonless sky and wondered what the hell I was going to do about Nicole. I was already half in love with her and it wouldn’t be long until I was head over heels.
She wasn’t falling in love, though, despite my best efforts. She kept holding back, keeping herself secluded from me. I didn’t appreciate it, but I also didn’t understand it; she was full of life and deserved to fall in love. Hell, even if it wasn’t with me, she still deserved it. But she ran away. The fact that she’d managed to make it to her age without truly falling in love surprised me and I knew I needed to get to the bottom of it.
For the time being, though, I wanted to get to know her better. I went back to the bed, climbed in and wrapped my arms around her.
* * * * *
I slept better that night than I had in years. I owed all the credit to Nicole, too. She calmed me. When I woke, though, she wasn’t in the bed with me. The bathroom door was wide open and the light off, so I knew she wasn’t in there. I sat up, thinking that she left me for the second morning in a row. Then I noticed her on the floor in front of the window.
“What are you doing?” I asked, dropping me feet to the floor.
Her eyes were closed. “I’m meditating.”
I rolled me eyes. “Oh. I’m going to shower. Don’t leave, okay?”
“I’m stuck here for another day. If I thought I could get away with it, trust me, I would go, but I know you’ll just sick the doctors on me. So I’m here all day.” She never even looked my direction.
“Okay, do you want me to order some breakfast?” I asked.
“I already did. It should be here in a few minutes, so make your shower fast,” she instructed.
I grinned at her back and then went into the bathroom. I started the water and stretched. I felt alive. Sleeping with Nicole was good for me, and come hell or high water, I’d make her realize it was good for her, too.
I took an extra-long shower, letting the hot water relax my muscles. Ten minutes into it, the bathroom door opened and Nicole poked her head inside.
“Hey, breakfast is here, just so you know,” she said and then closed the door.
I wanted to invite her into the shower with me, but even I knew we needed to talk. Personally, I dreaded it.
“It smells amazing,” I said when I exited the bathroom a few minutes later. I had on a pair of boxers, but my chest was bare as I sat down to the table. I picked up a plate and put two pancakes on it and then spooned some sugared strawberries on top. It looked delicious. I used my fork to cut off a bite and then shoved it my mouth. After a night of love-making, I was starved.
After a few bites, I noticed Nicole was staring at me. “What?” I asked with a mouthful of pancake.
“Is this what it was like watching me eat last night?” she asked, a smirk on her lips.
I swallowed what was in my mouth. “Ha-ha. You need to eat, too.” I nodded toward the plates of food on the table and she reluctantly helped herself.
In minutes, I was stuffed. I couldn’t eat another bite. Nicole seemed to feel the same way as she pushed her plate away from her. “I might throw up.”
“Don’t do that. You’ll make me throw up, too,” I warned.
“Weak stomach?”
I glared at her. “Maybe. Either way, it won’t be good for either of us to be throwing up. First thing tomorrow morning, I’d like to go visit Tyler.”
“Well, you could go today, if you wanted to. I don’t mind being left alone.”
I shrugged. “I’m not leaving you.” It wasn’t chivalry driving me to stay; I simply wanted to be with her. There were questions I needed answered.
I wasn’t sure how to broach the subject, though. I couldn’t exactly ask her about her life. Perhaps discussing Rainey with her would encourage her to talk about her life. We settled on the couch together, not touching and I put a movie on the television.
During the opening credits, I tried for a casual conversation. “I miss my sister.” Real casual, Dallas.
She turned to me. “I bet. I’m sure it was hard to watch her die. My parents were pretty much already gone when I arrived at the hospital, so seeing them was hard, but it didn’t get worse because I had to watch them deteriorate even further. I mean, I didn’t get to say goodbye, but I don’t know – I guess either way it sucks.”
“Yeah. I was glad we got to say our goodbyes, but every day, she looked worse and the simplest thing would exhaust her, so we couldn’t do much,” I agreed.
“Sometimes I wish my parents had been awake when I got to the hospital, but I know it happened that way for a reason. Who knows if I would have been able to handle seeing them and talking to them only
to have them die anyway? I was just a kid,” she said, wiping tears from her eyes.
“Don’t cry, Nic. Your parents wouldn’t want you to cry. They’d want you to be happy, to live life to the fullest.”
She gave me a sad smile. “I know they would. Doesn’t really make it any easier, though. I’ve had no choice but to be strong since they passed.”
She was getting emotional and I knew the conversation bothered her, so I changed the subject. “When did you get your camera?”
Photography was our shared passion, but it was also an easier topic of conversation than death.
“My dad gave me an old Polaroid when I was twelve. Before that, I was constantly stealing his and snapping pictures. He got tired of that, though and took me yard saling one Saturday, which is where we found the Polaroid. He showed me how to use it and ordered film online. I’ve been hooked ever since. My junior year in high school, I saved all my money from my part-time job and purchased my first DSLR. It took me a long time to be able to use it properly, but I watched every how-to video on the internet I could find about using the camera. I memorized the settings and started to see the small changes when I adjusted them.”
“I was completely self-taught by the time I was eighteen, but then the accident happened and I never thought I’d be able to get back to photography. It was Tyler who pushed me to go to school, to get a degree in photography. Without him, I doubt I would have done anything with my life. He gave me the strength to go on.”
I gulped, realizing just how important Tyler was to her, but also how much he’d helped me. Tyler was the most giving person I’d ever met and there was a very good chance he might die from Ebola. I wished there was more I could do for him, but I knew it wasn’t very likely. The only thing we could do was pray that his immune system fought hard and he got better.
“Tyler’s a great guy,” I agreed. “He helped me get through Rainey’s death, too.”
Nicole looked surprised. “He did? He never even mentioned that you’d been through something like that right away. I guess that was his way of helping you. If I knew about your sister when I decided to apply for the internship, I probably wouldn’t have applied. I don’t do well around other people who have lost someone.
We spent all morning talking about our lives and how the deaths of the people we loved most changed us. We laughed as we talked about the stupid things we’d done as children; she did the most ridiculous things with Tyler and I took every dare Rainey ever offered me. We were both still hurting, both still raw and emotional, but that kind of release, through laughter and cherishing the good memories was soul cleansing.
I didn’t think about sex all day; I was enamored of her as a person, not as a sex goddess. Her personality came to light and she shone brightly, despite the odds. When we decided to go to sleep for the night, she asked me to sleep with her, but only because she didn’t want to sleep alone. She didn’t want sex. I didn’t mind being used as a cuddle buddy, either; I wanted to sleep all night next to her, too.
* * * * *
I woke up refreshed and feeling better than I had in a long time. Nicole was already in the shower when I got out of bed. I knocked on the door.
“Hey, come on in. Did you want to shower? There’s still some hot water,” she said, poking her head out from behind the shower curtain.
“Yeah, that would be great.” I was only wearing my boxers, but I was suddenly extremely self-conscious as she stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around her body. I shucked my boxers, forcing myself to ignore her pointed glance at my crotch. I slipped into the shower and let the water cascade over me.
“I was thinking we’d go to the hospital today and check up on Ty. We haven’t heard anything from the nurses, so maybe he’s doing better,” she hoped aloud.
I wasn’t as positive. No news was good news, but given that the nurses knew how upset Nicole was, they might not have called for her sake. “Sounds good. Want to grab breakfast to go downstairs in the lobby?” My stomach growled in anticipation.
“Sure. I should be ready by the time you are.”
I heard the door close and I rushed through my shower. I shut off the water after I washed myself and grabbed the last towel off the towel rack and quickly dried myself. I tucked the towel into itself around my hips and went out into the room, where Nicole was putting on a pair of sneakers.
“Almost ready. I just need to do something with my hair,” she said to me without looking up. She tied her laces and then went into the bathroom, closing the door behind her.
I took the opportunity to get dressed. I dropped the towel and pulled on a pair of boxers. I searched through my small duffel bag to find something suitable and settled on a pair of jeans and a plain black t-shirt. As I pulled the shirt over my head, Nicole came out of the bathroom.
She looked amazing. She wore minimal makeup, just a little mascara to make her green eyes pop, and her hair was styled nicely. She seemed to have given up on straightening her hair, as it always ended up swirled around her face.
“I’m ready to go. Are you?” She looked me over, taking her time. She seemed to be taking me in completely.
“Yeah, let me put on my shoes.”
The ride to the hospital was quiet, almost too quiet. I wondered if she had second thoughts about being with me, even though we weren’t actually together. I didn’t voice my opinion, though. She needed to figure out what she wanted without any interference from me or anyone else.
Tyler’s floor was a flurry of excitement when we got off the elevator. Nicole shot me an excited gaze, but I was more apprehensive.
His room had at least six nurses inside, all of them standing around his bed and smiling. Nicole and I squeezed in and there he was, sitting up and talking quietly to the doctor at his side. My heart soared for him, but more so for Nicole. She wasn’t going to be alone, no matter what happened between her and me.
Nicole rushed forward and hugged him, tears escaping her eyes. “I missed you!”
Tyler laughed lightly and asked the doctor to come back later so he could have a few minutes with his cousin. When the doc and all the nurses were gone, he hugged Nicole properly, taking her into his arms. Tears formed in his own eyes as he held her.
“I missed you, too, Nic,” he whispered to her.
“I was so worried,” Nicole murmured against his chest. The scene was heartbreaking, but I couldn’t look away. I remembered all too well how broken I was after Rainey’s passing. They got to hold on to each other a little longer. Jealousy burned through me, even though I knew it was wrong.
“I promise you, I’m fine. I heard you were in here the other day, though,” he said, giving her a classic big brother look.
“Oh, yeah. It was no big deal, just a little dehydrated. I’m fine now.” She didn’t meet his eyes.
“It is a big deal, but we can talk about it later. Actually, will you go get me a glass of water?” he asked her.
She didn’t look like she wanted to leave, but she nodded reluctantly. She got off his bed and left the room.
Tyler glared at me. “You slept with her, didn’t you?”
I looked at the floor. “Listen…”
“No, you listen. I told you not to touch her, Dallas. I should kick your ass.”
He was right. “I’m sorry.” His words made me think of Stone and how protective I was of Ember. It was almost the same situation, but I was the one taking advantage. I felt like shit.
“Not good enough. What are your intentions?” he asked me, his gaze bordering frightening.
“Uhh…” I started, not sure how to answer.
“It’s whatever. But if she asks you to go, I want you to leave her alone. She’s been heartbroken enough in the last few years.”
I tipped my head back. “What? Not a chance. I’m not walking away.”
“She won’t give you a choice,” he said sadly, as if he knew exactly what she would do.
Nicole walked back in, cutting off the conversation compl
etely.
Twenty-Six
Nicole
Something happened while I was out of the room. It was ridiculously obvious. The tension between the two men was nearly tangible. I tried to ignore the tense atmosphere. I walked to Ty and handed him the cup of water. I pulled a chair up to the bed and held his hand while he took a sip.
Tyler knew about Dallas and me; there was no way he didn’t. I was avoiding Dallas’s gaze like the plague, which only made it more obvious. I wished I could take back sleeping with him. Lie. I thoroughly enjoyed having sex with Dallas. He was passionate and demanding, giving me no quarter, but I liked it.
My last relationship was more fifty shades of mental illness than shades of grey, so being able to be a partner with him during sex was a change. It was also exciting; he cared about my pleasure and not only his own. I liked to tease him, but he gave it right back and we balanced one another out. He gave when I took and vice versa.
When Dallas finally left me alone with my cousin, Tyler perked up and wanted to talk about the relationship I’d entered into.
“So what’s going on?” he asked me, his eyebrows wiggling suggestively.
From the chair beside his bed, I dropped my head in my hands. “I don’t even know.”
He let out a chuckle. “You’re old enough to do what you want.”
“Oh, I know. It’s awkward… I mean, I like Dallas – he’s attractive and funny, but he’s also suffered a lot, not unlike me. His sister’s death was harder on him than he lets on. Until he comes to terms with her death, I don’t think he’s going to be able to have a healthy relationship.” I knew exactly how hard it would be on him; I’d been there.
“When did you get so smart?” Tyler asked, smirking at me. “That’s exactly what I was going to tell you. I also think you should stay away from him.”
Wild Dreams Page 14
