by Hart, Lane
“No!” I exclaim before she finishes that sentence. “No fucking way. The only people going with us to prom are you and Aric and me and Sophie since Blake refuses to find a substitution for Caroline.”
“Told you,” Aric whispers to his girl.
“Fine,” Maddie sighs. “But you’re being a dick, Royal.”
“What else is new, Big Red?” I ask her.
“Why are you going with Sophie?” Aric asks. “I didn’t know you two were, like, a thing or whatever.”
“We’re not. We’re just friends who decided to go together since we can’t go with the person we want to…”
Fuck.
“Who did you want to go with, Royal?” Maddie asks with a grin and tilt of her head.
“Correction, Sophie couldn’t go with the guy she wanted to go with. That’s what I meant,” I lie.
“Who did she want to go with?” Aric asks.
“How the fuck am I supposed to know?” I ask. “Taking a guess with Sophie and all of her kinks, he’s probably a minister or a rabbi or a married man.”
“I love her perky ass,” Aric says. “But the girl does have some serious daddy issues. Her parents are, like, never home.”
“Hey! My parents weren’t either, and I don’t have a thing for older men,” Maddie says.
“You’re an anemone.”
“I think you mean anomaly,” Maddie corrects him with a grin.
“Yeah, that’s what I said, anemone,” Aric contends.
“That’s right, Big Red,” I agree. “You are a complete anemone, the plant or sea life. Your choice.”
“Better than being a cunt,” Maddie says with a glare in my direction. “Besides, we all know you’re just deflecting so you don’t have to talk about who you wanted to go to prom with.”
“I wanted to go with Sophie. End of discussion. Now, shut the fuck up.”
“Oh yeah,” Aric says, taking a sip of his water. “He definitely wanted to go with his nemesis. Royal is totally jelly.”
“I’m not…jelly,” I argue. “And please don’t ever use that word again. It makes you sound like a twelve-year-old girl.”
“He is so jelly,” Maddie interjects with a laugh. “It’s sort of cute coming from the angry ginger.”
“I’m not jealous, it’s not cute, and I am not a ginger, Big Red.”
“That orange tint in your hair begs to differ, Leprechaun,” she throws back at me.
“My hair is not orange. It’s…copper.”
“Copper is on the orange spectrum.”
“And you’re on the far end of the bitch spectrum,” I respond.
“I’ll forgive you for that insult since you’re obviously distraught about your girl going to prom with someone else.”
Rather than continue to argue with her that I don’t care about Hannah and Garrett, because I do, I simply flip her both of my middle fingers.
Neither Maddie nor Aric thankfully bring up Hannah again while we eat.
And on the drive home, I realize that this news about her moving on with someone, even if he is a prick, is a good thing. It means I can finally stop obsessing about her. She’s moving on, dating someone else like she should’ve done a long time ago. But she never did because of me. At least I think I’m part of the reason.
The two of us were never meant to be together. Hannah’s the innocent good girl, and I’m the broken bad boy who can never be fixed no matter how hard she tries.
Soon, I’ll be leaving her and everyone else behind to start over, so the last thing I need are the memories of her holding me back.
* * *
Hannah
“What you’re doing to Royal is wrong,” Sophie says, accosting me as soon as I climb out of my car in the school parking lot one morning just a week or so after Garrett asked me to prom, and we started being sort of a couple. I now sit with him and some of his jock friends at lunch instead of Maddie and the Royals.
“I’m sorry. What?” I ask, turning my back to the scowling cheerleader to grab my backpack and slam the car door.
“Seeing you with Garrett is hell on him and you know it.”
“I seriously doubt that,” I say when I face her again since Royal’s been avoiding me since the day he came over to my house six or so months ago.
“It’s true.”
“Well, he’s the one who ruined everything, so if it does bother him, which I don’t think it really does, then it’s his own fault.”
I start to march past her up the sidewalk when she calls out, “Did he tell you that his dad is the one who sent the guy to cheat on the SAT?”
“Yes, but how do I know if that’s true or not?” I ask her over my shoulder.
“Because it is!” Sophie shouts. I stop for her to catch up to me. “His dad is a monster who abuses him, mentally and-and physically.”
My jaw drops at hearing that. “H-how do you know that?”
“Royal told me months ago,” she says, making me dislike her even more since they must be close if he would tell her something so personal and awful. “Do you think he’s lying about that? I don’t. Why would he? I’ve seen the bruises. He’s ashamed and embarrassed about that and other things, which is why his default personality is to be a total dick.”
“I-I didn’t know all of that,” I say, wondering about what she means by the “other things.”
“That’s right, you don’t. But you would if you gave him a chance.”
“I’m sorry if he’s going through that at home, but I just can’t give him another chance.”
“You have no clue how much he’s about to lose. Don’t you think he’s been punished enough for whatever happened between the two of you?”
“What is he about to lose?” I ask in concern.
“How about you get off your high horse and just talk to him? Otherwise, I think you’ll always regret it.”
“I’m not sure what Royal’s told you, but you don’t know the whole story, the things that happened between us almost two years ago.”
“Oh yeah? Well, it can’t be that bad.”
“It is,” I argue, standing my ground. “In fact, I’ll let you listen to something, and then you can tell me if you still think Royal deserves a second chance.”
“Fine. Tell me when and where.”
“My house, tonight. I’ll be home since I don’t have much of a social life anymore thanks to Royal.”
“You didn’t have much of one before he labeled you persona non grata at Mercy either, in case you forgot.”
“Until you’ve been in my shoes, I don’t think your opinion is worth a shit,” I tell her, tired of her arrogance.
Rolling her brown eyes, she says, “Oh, calm your tits. I’ll see you at seven.”
“See you then,” I agree.
* * *
Later that night, I hear a knock on the door around six-thirty and know it’s Sophie showing up early. From the top of the stairs, I can hear her oozing fake sweetness when my dad answers the door.
“Oh, hi, Mr. Morgan. I’m Hannah’s friend, Sophie. She invited me over to hang out.”
“Oh,” my dad says in surprise since lately only Maddie comes to visit. “She’s upstairs. Go right on up.”
“Thank you, sir,” Sophie responds before she comes around the corner and sees me halfway down the stairs. It’s not fair that even in a plain blue t-shirt and jeans with her blonde hair pulled up in a ponytail she still looks pretty and dainty. Except for the fact I notice that her eyes look a little red and puffy, like she’s been crying.
“I’m here. Let’s listen to whatever it is that you think is so bad,” she says with a huff.
“You sure you don’t want to braid each other’s hair and talk about boys first?” I ask in her same honey sweet voice she used on my dad.
A glare is her response before I turn around and lead the way back up the steps and to my room. Shutting the door behind her, I go and pick up the recorder from my desk, the one I never returned to Garrett and he’s never mentioned.
> “Here,” I say when I hand the device to Sophie. “It’s ready, so just hit play.”
She does and then Garrett’s voice is filling the silence, taking me back to that horrible night in my dorm room where I had my heart shattered into so many pieces it was impossible to find them all.
“So what if it sucks for her? At least you’re getting some pussy, right?”
“Right,” Royal replies. “Besides, I don’t give a shit about Hannah. Everything I’ve done the last four weeks was solely for the purpose of getting in her panties. And it obviously worked.”
“You two aren’t going to be a couple or whatever when we go back to school?” Garrett asks.
“Hell no,” Royal answers, his voice so adamant about that fact that once again tears well up in my eyes like the first time I heard it. “There are going to be so many hot new pieces of freshman ass at Mercy. Not to mention the senior girls who are pros at deep throating. As soon as I make the varsity football team, they’re going to be all over my dick, so why would I want to be tied down to some goddamn prude?”
“Hmm,” Sophie says when the conversation cuts off and she tosses the recorder on my bed.
“Hmm? That’s all you have to say about the way he talked about me? I fell for him and thought he cared about me for weeks!”
“I need a second to think about this,” she says as she chews on her bottom lip.
“How would you feel if the man you loved said those things about you?” I ask her.
“You loved him?” she asks, eyebrows lifting in surprise.
“I-I don’t know anymore. Whatever I felt for him pretty much got zapped away after I heard that recording since he was pretending the whole time.”
“And Garrett gave that to you?”
“Yeah.”
Sophie goes over to my bed where the device fell and picks it up again. “Can I borrow this?”
“Why?”
“Has Royal ever listened to it?” she asks.
“No.”
“Does he not know that Garrett recorded him?”
“No. I didn’t want him to go after Garrett.”
“Don’t you think Royal deserves to hear it, though, and have a chance to explain himself?”
“There’s no explanation needed. He used me and never had any intention of us being together after camp,” I point out.
“So this all happened at camp?
“Yes, church camp, the summer before our junior year.”
“Huh,” she mutters. “Do a lot of people have sex at church camp?”
My face reddens in shame before I answer. “More than you would expect. Please don’t tell anyone. My reputation is bad enough as it is.”
“I won’t,” she agrees. “But I am going to let Royal listen to this,” she adds, holding up the recorder.
“No! You can’t, Sophie! Royal will kill Garrett when he finds out.”
“Maybe Garrett deserves it,” she says with a shrug, slipping the recorder into her back jean pocket.
“Garrett didn’t do anything wrong!”
“You don’t think so?”
“No.”
Narrowing her brown eyes at me, she asks, “You don’t find it the least bit suspicious that he had the recorder going at the exact moment to catch Royal talking shit about you?”
“They were roommates. Royal could’ve been talking shit about me all the time, for all I know.”
“Yet this is the only recording you have of him saying something negative about you?”
“Well, yeah.”
“That’s suspicious as hell to me,” she says as she walks over to my door and pulls it open. “See ya later, Hannah.”
“Sophie, don’t do this!” I beg her.
“Sorry, hon, but I’m doing what you should have years ago, and there’s nothing you can do to stop me.”
Once she’s gone, I stand there frozen, unsure what to do next. I can’t exactly tackle her on the stairs to get the recorder back. It’s too late. She’s leaving with it, and soon enough Royal will hear himself and know what Garrett did.
Chapter Twenty-One
Royal
“What’s up, Soph? Your text sounded urgent,” I say when I meet up with her at the bleachers on the football field and she’s already sitting on the lowest ones.
“So, don’t get mad, but I talked to Hannah.”
“Fuck, Sophie,” I say as I run my fingers through my hair. I thought the Hannah chapter of my life was finally closed. She’s moving on. I don’t even want to hurt her anymore; I just want to pretend like she doesn’t exist. “Were you a bitch to her? I told you I’m done with her.”
“No, I wasn’t a bitch,” she says with her chin raised defiantly, making me call bullshit. “And we both know you’ve never been done with her. As soon as you listen to this, I do believe you’ll thank me.”
“Listen to what?” I ask as she stands up to remove something small and rectangular from her back jean pocket.
“This,” she says, hitting the play button and holding it between us so we can both hear it when someone’s voice comes on.
It takes me a minute to realize it’s my voice and…Garrett’s. When the fuck have I ever talked to that chump?
As soon as it gets to the part where I mention senior girls at Mercy, I finally realize it’s the conversation we had at camp, the night before we all left.
The last night Hannah let me touch her.
The night Garrett told me she regretted being with me and that the sex sucked.
“How did you…” I start to ask when it finally hits me. “That son of a bitch set me up!” I explode as I jerk the device from her hand, wanting to crush it in my bare palm or set it on fire. “He gave that shit to Hannah, didn’t he? Either the last night of camp or the last day. That’s why she wouldn’t talk to me!”
“Yep,” Sophie says, popping her p. “You need to kick his ass.”
“Hell yes, I do,” I agree before I finally take a seat on the bleachers to think everything through. “This is why Hannah ended things without ever talking to me again.”
“Can you honestly blame her, Royal?” Sophie asks when she sits down beside me. “What you said was fucking brutal.”
“I didn’t mean it,” I tell her honestly. “None of it.”
“Then why did you say it?”
“Do you remember me telling you about how Hannah said she regretted things about me, about us?”
“Yeah?”
“Garrett had just told me that right before the tape starts.”
“What did he say specifically?”
“He said Hannah told some of the other girls that she regretted being with me, that she wished she would’ve waited like she had planned, and that…that it wasn’t good for her when we were together.”
“Sex with you?”
“Yeah, the sex.”
“So you were angry and hurt,” she says.
“Of course I was angry and hurt! I asked her over and over again if she was sure she was ready, and she said she was!”
“I think Garrett lied to you, Royal. In fact, the tape starts with him mentioning that it wasn’t “good for her”, right?”
“Yeah, I think so,” I say before I rewind and play his shady ass voice again. “That’s right after he told me that shit.”
“He planned it all out,” Sophie says. “He knew that once he told you the lies she allegedly said about you that you would have a knee-jerk reaction and want to hurt her back. So he was ready and recorded it. Then, he gave it to Hannah, making her think you used her and convincing you that she regretted being with you when, in fact…you two loved each other, didn’t you?” she finishes on a sigh.
“I don’t know,” I say. “I thought so, but everything ended so fast and then school was starting back. I should’ve talked to Hannah…”
“Yeah, you should’ve talked to her, and she should’ve played you the recording. But both of you were too hurt and upset, so you didn’t.”
“I’
m gonna kill that asshole,” I threaten through clenched teeth while squeezing the recorder in my palm.
“You can’t kill him,” Sophie says. “But he definitely deserves some serious payback.”
“That fucker is taking Hannah to prom! He’s been trying to get with her for years; and he thought that, by pushing me out of the way, he could have her. Then, for prom, when no other guy would ask Hannah because of my threats, he tried to play the part of the hero.”
“I think you should let him take her to prom,” Sophie says.
“What? Are you out of your mind? He doesn’t deserve to walk, much less walk into prom with her!”
“Just hear me out, okay?” she asks. “You and I could still go to prom together…”
“You never told me who you want to go with but can’t,” I point out.
“Doesn’t matter. This is about you.” She blows me off with a wave of her hand. “The two of us go together, Hannah goes with that weasel, Garrett; and then when the asshole least expects it, you make him pay by taking him out of the picture.”
“Kill him?” I say in surprise since that’s a little extreme even for me.
“No, Royal, just prevent him from enjoying the rest of prom so that you can swoop in and be with Hannah. It’ll be perfect! You can dance with her and explain everything and then live happily ever after!”
“Sounds like a long shot,” I mutter. “Besides, I’m done with her. I have to be whether I want to or not. I’ve already made plans, remember? Now that I’ve signed the contracts, I can’t back out of that shit.”
“I’m not suggesting that you back out of your commitment. All I’m asking is if you still want to be with her or not? You’ve already wasted almost two years when you two could’ve been high school sweethearts, the couple that makes everyone want to puke because you’re so perfect together.”
“We probably would’ve broken up before Christmas break our junior year.”
“You don’t know that!” Sophie exclaims. “And you never got to find out because of one dickwad interfering.”
“Yeah, that’s true. No matter what, he’s gonna regret fucking with me.”
