Violet watched us both, her wise eyes shifting between us. She could feel, I was sure, the emotion… and in her own way she was struggling to understand… She pointed a finger out toward the ocean, the question showing in her eyes.
“Yes, sweetheart,” Angelina said, “blue is for water, too.”
I smiled, love and pride bursting from my chest. “Blue is for water… and for my son,” I said to her. “He’ll be your little brother, Violet, and you’ll be his big sister. We’ll take care of him, you and I, because it’s our job. The way you take care of Miri, and Mommy takes care of you…”
She stared at the water for a long time and pointed her finger again. I started to give her the word she wanted… but she pursed her lips and took in a breath… I held mine…
“Boo,” she said softly.
I looked from her to her mother’s streaming face. Violet shifted her eyes to her mother’s face and pointed again…
She smiled in the gentlest way, as if she was still very far away and inhaled softly, almost like the sound of a sigh, or a wave breaking the surface… Her finger turned away from the ocean,
and reached out for her mother’s wet cheek and luminous blue eyes…
“... Mah… mma…”
45
Epilogue
Violet
My wedding day
“And that’s the way we fell in love,” Mama finished, adjusting her pearl tiara on my dark curls.
She stood back and smiled, her face so full of emotions. She reached out for my hand, but looked beyond me, over my shoulder to watch the blue, rolling sea. She took a deep breath and exhaled, quiet now… but I could tell there were still words behind her eyes. Mama has the deepest eyes I’ve ever seen.
I knew she hadn’t told me everything…
“So you knew right away?” I asked. “The same way Henry and I did?”
And it was okay… because I understand now that every love has its secrets…
“Just the same, sweetheart,” she answered, putting her palm against my cheek. “He took me in his arms and danced with me… and nothing in my life was ever the same.” She kissed my forehead. “I knew when he kissed me… that we were made for each other. He gave me you… and your brother… Your father has always put the beat in my heart,” she said softly, her eyes shining as she stood up and put her shoulders back bravely.
“Now,” she said, composing herself, “I’ve gone on too long already.” She reached out and smoothed one of my curls. “I should probably get downstairs and send Daddy up. He’s waiting to walk you down that aisle… and I’ve never seen him so nervous. The last time I checked, he was pacing a bare spot into the carpet… And I expect Aunt Mattie needs some help rounding up the twins…” She paused, as the strength of her emotion suddenly pulled her back to me.
“You are the most beautiful bride, the most amazing daughter,” she burst out, overflowing suddenly, tears spotting the front of her dress. “You know how much we love you, sweetheart. And we love your Henry just as much.” She smiled at me, her face wet and shining. “He’s family too now, you know. And we’ll always be here for you, for both of you… no matter what…”
“I know, Mama,” I answered, wiping her tears away. “Just like you’ve always been.” I glanced away, feeling shy for a moment and she headed for the door.
“Mama?”
“Yes, baby?” she turned…
“I love you, too,” I said simply, “for everything you’ve done for me, for my whole life, Mama… For your strength of will… for believing in me…”
And we shared a long silent moment, the way we did when I was little. We had never really needed words to understand each other’s hearts, for the deepest things are often the ones that need no words at all.
She nodded, bright-eyed, smiling at me with all the courage and power of a mother’s love and slipped out, closing the door behind her.
Mama had always told me, from the time I was just a little girl, that I was part of their love story.
But it was only when Henry gave me my first kiss on prom night under the stars… that I finally began to truly understand about the hidden depths that exist between a man and a woman… and how it feels to have something secret that belongs to the two of you alone. I saw it in Henry’s eyes that night. And I saw it in my own, when I looked into the mirror after he’d brought me home. It was the same sweet mystery I’d always seen in my parents’ eyes when they looked at each other, and my first real awareness of the beautiful, exciting world beneath the surface of love.
Henry is my best friend, my whole world, the music in my heart. He’s the only man I’ve ever kissed, and the only one I ever will. He’s a gentle man who understands me, who understands all the things that words aren’t powerful enough to say. He listens to me… but he understands my silences, too. He should, for we practically grew up together as students at Aunt Donna’s school. Then we transitioned together into the mainstream by middle school, and have been completely inseparable ever since. I can’t remember a time in my life before him, and I can’t imagine a life without him. We’ll be living in the cottage for a little while after the wedding, but only until he’s worked out the final details of the concert tour. I’m still a little nervous, but he’s confident that I’m ready… and just looking into his eyes makes me feel courageous…
I smoothed the creamy silk of Mama’s wedding gown over my knees and looked into the mirror at my reflection. Daddy’s dark hair and Mama’s blue eyes. The same sprinkling of freckles as my brother, David. My family, the loves of my life… but then so is the man I’m about to marry. On my finger, his diamond caught the light, and sparkled with flame and passion… promise and love.
And if there was anything in the whole world I understood, it was love. I’d had my whole life to learn from my parents what it looks like, how it feels. I saw the way they looked at each other, felt the way the air crackled between them when he took her in his arms and she laughed with sweet pleasure. Love is the way they looked at my little brother the day he was born. And it was the way Daddy sat beside me at the piano, and wrote down my notes as I played them. Love is the way they nurtured me until I was able to grow beyond my own limitations, and it’s what taught me how to share my music with the whole world. Love is what they gave to me my entire life, without reservation, even when I wasn’t able to express it in return.
And after twenty-five years, my parents still share the same passion, the same pure devotion, the same bond between them that I remember growing up. It’s like something secret ties them, one heart to the other. And it knows no bounds. It’s the same for Henry and me. And tonight, we’ll learn together, for the very first time, what that love really means. I’ll take care of him… and he’ll take care of me. He’s the one man in the world I know I can trust with my whole heart. And I know I’ll always be safe in his arms.
“Baby…?” Daddy said from the doorway. “My perfect, beautiful baby girl…” He stood, holding out his big, strong hands to me and I took them. “No daughter ever made her father prouder… and no father ever loved a daughter more than I love you…,” he said, hugging me tight… like he never wanted to let me go… “But it’s time… and your Henry is waiting for you…”
Mama always said that everyone needs something to believe in.
I think I believe in love.
Because, in the end, it’s what puts the harmony in our hearts, and the music in our souls. Even though we all communicate in different ways, it’s the single purest, most powerful way we touch one another. My mother, my father… and Henry, have all taught me this…
That short or tall… young or old…
bold… or silent…
every single one of us will have a love story to tell someday.
Even me.
Bonus Book: The Competition
The riskier the setting, the higher the score.
The more innocent the girl, the bigger the payoff.
The harder the conquest, the harde
r you f*ck.
Rule Number One?
Just never get caught.
I know what I am. A man without a conscience. I had my heart broken once, but there won’t be a second time. Now, sex is just a game and love doesn’t exist.
I live for The Competition. For the challenge… the chase… the conquest.
Did you ever wonder if you could do it? Have sex in public… without getting caught?
Just the thought makes my blood run hot and my c*ck rock hard.
Maybe it’s the billionaire lifestyle. A man gets jaded, so he creates a game… Others play for money, but I play to win.
Business and fortune are on the line, and scandal could strip it away forever.
And that’s what makes my heart pound… and my c*ck pound harder. There’s no bigger thrill, nothing more exciting, than getting away with it.
But I knew it was game over when I met Emily. Secrets never stay secret. Sooner or later, one of us would get caught.
I just never expected…
...that it would be me.
1
Chase
Sutton had selected the sweet-hot daughter of one of the evening’s more important guests and slipped a flute of champagne into her hand. He whispered in her ear and she laughed, turning her face up to his in answer, fluttering her lashes and teetering nervously on her pink Prada heels. I wasn’t close enough to hear what he said… but then I didn’t fucking need to be. One look at Sutton’s face and I knew. The game was on.
Her gown was short, but elegant… and expensive enough to forgive the expanse of creamy cleavage it displayed. Sutton smiled darkly and shifted behind her, drawing her a step back, against him and closer to the carefully manicured hedges on the outskirts of the party. He spoke to her… she blushed deeply… They both kept their eyes on the other guests. At first, his hands rested at her slender waist… but then one of them slipped behind… and disappeared.
I watched long enough to see the girl’s hand tighten on her glass. Then she shifted those expensive shoes apart… just barely, very discreetly… Not enough that anyone else would understand. But I did.
He hadn’t heard a goddamned word I’d said. He didn’t give a shit that this wasn’t the time or the place. Or that we’d spent better than two million on this event. I tossed back what was left of the scotch in my glass. The evening had only just begun… and I was already on fucking damage control.
A dozen feet away, couples danced sedately… men elegant in black tie and ladies who glittered tastefully with diamonds. Small groups clustered around the bar and everyone held a sparkling glass. Lights that glowed pale yellow, like the color of candlelight were strung from expansive tree limbs that sheltered the outdoor pavilion. The music was classic, soft… and waiters moved silently with their silver trays.
I grabbed another drink, determined to play interference. Not to save his ass… and not to get him laid either. We both knew the rules of the game. Hell, I’d been mostly responsible for inventing them. But tonight my focus wasn’t on the competition. It was about making sure this event brought in enough cash to keep Envisager Inc. on top, right where it had always been, and right where it belonged. That, and making sure my right hand man didn’t bring the whole night crashing down in scandal on top of us.
“Looks like Boothe couldn’t wait,” Ben said, coming up to touch his glass to mine. His blue eyes were shining with the same dangerous excitement I was feeling, but his smile was uncertain. “He takes more goddamned chances than all the rest of us combined. But Christ, you gotta admit,” he lifted his glass toward the couple, “he fuckin’ aims high…”
I shot a look at that lone hand still resting so casually against the girl’s waist. They continued to watch the dancers, and I could see their lips moving as they spoke to one another. Anyone else watching would have simply seen an attractive young entrepreneur being charmingly, but respectably attentive to an attractive young brunette at a social gathering. But her eyes were enormous and I knew that smile on Sutton’s face. The girl’s hemline was ever so slightly shorter than it had been before and tight against her thighs… There was nothing respectable about it.
“Just make sure her father doesn’t come looking for her,” I shot out under my breath. “I don’t know what the fuck that asshole is thinking… This isn’t a game night. And there’s no goddamned win worth the risk he’s taking. There are too many fucking politicians here for this kind of shit…”
Ben nodded and took off toward the senator, catching a waiter with a platterful of iced shrimp as he went. I stood my ground, doing my best to look casual, smiling and nodding… making small talk with guests who strayed too close… redirecting them after a minute or two, to chat with someone else. All the while, grinding my teeth and furious inside, waiting for Sutton to finish what he’d started. Furious at myself for having created the game in the first place… and hating the part of me that still ached to best him at it.
I dropped my empty glass on a passing tray and picked up a fresh one. Not to drink, but to have something cold in my hands… something to distract me. I knew exactly what was happening and so help me, even though I’d sworn I was finished with all of it, I could still feel the pull of the game. I’d never found anything that could compete with the thrill, the challenge, and the excitement of putting everything at stake. My cock stiffened, responding to memory…
“But there are people everywhere…,” she’d objected over the pounding beat of the concert, even as she’d rubbed her ass against the hard bulge in my jeans. “I don’t think we can… not here…”
I caught the sound of the girl behind me with Sutton. She had gasped and I knew from the sound that he was inside her. Fucking her in plain view, and yet no one even knew… If we were lucky…
“No one will even know, baby,” I’d told my date as I’d slipped my fingers under the hem of her little skirt to stroke the wet spot on her panties. Her pussy lips had been firm, eager… she had been just as excited by the idea as I was… “Too many people and too much noise… You can come right here… Just stay close, and dance with me… I’ll be the only one who knows, the only one who can feel you coming on me…”
The whole crowd had been on their feet and moving with the music. I’d unzipped and slipped my cock inside the elastic edge of her panties, letting the big head of my cock seal the rest of the deal. And she had moved just like everyone around us, bouncing up and down to the music…
Except she’d tilted her hips and come down hard, impaling herself on my rod and crying out, adding her voice to the deafening music and the roar of the crowd. I’d held her waist lightly, giving her the freedom to dance us both to a pounding climax. That had been five years ago, and the first time I’d had sex in public. But it hadn’t been the last. Almost a year had passed since that very last time… and since I’d sworn off for good.
But I still ached, wanting the danger, wanting the risk… hungry for the rush that came with the conquest. And while I could control my choices, I couldn’t seem to control that need. God knew, I had tried. And Sutton knew too. That’s why he had chosen tonight, and had made sure that I’d seen him. He was issuing a challenge…
To rejoin the game.
It had always been a competition between us. In the boardroom, developing deals, even fundraisers like this evening. Together we had created a tech empire with the potential to shape the global future. We had pushed ourselves and each other, driving toward that single goal. And up until we’d reached it, that single challenge had been enough.
But we were risk-takers by nature, lost without the constant thrill of pursuit. When we’d achieved our goals in the business world, nights like this one had become commonplace, with the rich and the famous… the moguls and the politicians… all vying to hand over cash to Envisager. We had the best minds in the world working for us, with us. Everyone who had written a check tonight knew it was an investment that couldn’t fail. But in becoming two of the wealthiest men on the west coast, we had also beco
me jaded with everything that had come too quickly… almost too easily. In only a few short years, the only challenge left had become the danger of losing it all just as fast. For money becomes dangerous when there’s enough to buy privilege… and forgiveness.
That’s when we started the game and put everything on the line. We risked our companies and our reputations, everything… all for a fast fuck or a secret blow job. It was all for the thrill, all for the challenge. Risky enough, but riskier still, once the wagering began… That was when I finally knew, that for me at least, it had to be over. The name of the game? Public seduction.
The rules of competition?
The riskier the setting, the higher the score.
The more innocent the girl, the bigger the payoff.
The harder the conquest, the harder you strive
and the harder you fuck.
Oh, and no matter what… Don’t ever get caught.
They say money is the root of all evil. But they’re wrong.
I am.
2
Emily
“Darn it, Gran… What choice do we have?” I ran my fingers through my hair in exasperation. This was the fourth fucking time we’d had this conversation…
“I’ve already taken the check. And the party is this weekend. Reese and Tam have been putting in almost as many hours as I have, and without that money I have no way to pay them.” I turned to face her. “I’ve given my word. I’m sorry if you don’t like this. I’m not sure I do either. But the catering business is dying on its feet. I did what I had to do… just to stay competitive…”
“Don’t you swear when you speak to me, Emily,” she replied stiffly, struggling to put her feet on the floor. She gripped the handle of her cane with a gnarled hand. “I’m still your grandmother and you will mind your manners with me, young lady…” She stood from the bed long enough to finish her speech and then sat back down. “How can the business be in trouble? You just did the Peterman wedding a few weeks ago…”
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