“But it didn’t change who I was. Or what I’d done. The pain always came back. And I was hurting the women I was with. I couldn’t keep doing it.” He lifted the rope of my hair and breathed in, at the nape of my neck. “They wanted more. And there wasn’t any more I had to give them. And then one day I stopped. Not wanting. I never stopped wanting.” His breath was quickening. “But I stopped hurting them, using them. Taking from them.”
“You gave them pleasure,” I breathed, my mouth open, lips soft as I remembered. “You only gave. And watched their pleasure. Experiencing it through them.” His hand moved up my belly, cupping the weight of my breast in his hand. He squeezed gently and I felt a pool of moisture form between my thighs.
“You let the desire drive you,” I panted. “For the control. For the power it gives you…”
“Yes, Grace… I need all those things. I need the strength. I need the focus. I need to control all the things that I feel… All the things that I want…” He cupped both my breasts, lifting them and pushing them tight together. Then he slowly spread them apart, lifting and pulling gently. His cock was pounding beneath me. “I need the strength that you give me, my beautiful girl,” he whispered against the hollow of my spine. “And I need the power to hold back.”
He kissed my skin, dipping his tongue into the curves. “You’re perfect, Grace. Innocent and unmarked. You’re the loveliest woman I’ve ever seen. The loveliest woman I’ve ever touched in my life. You’re strong and perfect. And you know how to love…” He pulled away and took a long breath. “I won’t take all that from you. I can’t.”
I turned in his lap in one swift movement, wrapping my legs around his waist, my hips open, my hot center against him. My belly was to his belly, my chest to his chest. “You wouldn’t be taking, Kaine. I’m here for you. Right here. And I want this. I want you, Kaine.” I held his face in my hands. “You’re not taking from me, Kaine. I’m giving.”
He put his hands over mine, pressing them against his jaw. I could feel his heartbeat there. Fast and strong.
“I can’t love you, Grace. I can’t love anyone… and it wouldn’t be fair.” He was so close… but still so far from me. “You don’t know who I am. What I’ve done.” He drew in a shaky breath and let it out unsteadily.
“I was responsible for the death of my brother.” The words were little more than a whisper. “He was so little, so young. And he loved me.” His head fell forward in my hands, his forehead resting on mine. “He trusted me to keep him safe. I loved him and I failed him, Grace. I let him die, right in front of me… and I couldn’t save him.”
I held him in my arms, rocking him silently. There was nothing more to say. Kaine held me too, and we sat in the quiet dark. Rocking each other. Holding each other.
I couldn’t tell him now. He wouldn’t hear me. But I knew he was wrong in what he’d said… that he couldn’t love. He didn’t know it yet, but he was loving me right now.
He’d finally let me in.
27
Kaine
I woke as Grace turned in my arms. She was still asleep. My robe was tangled around my legs. Her towel had fallen to the floor hours ago. We’d fallen asleep, wrapped in each other’s arms. I moved gently, easing a hand under my head so I could look down at her.
The light came through the window, playing along the length of her body. She was pale and golden, her lashes dark against her cheeks. Even in her sleep her bottom lip was caught between her teeth. It was round and pink. My cock was hard, the head wet with my own anticipation. Her hand brushed against my thigh and her eyes fluttered open. She was pure and innocent, and trusting. She looked at me with love and acceptance. Her hands slipped around to my back, pulling me in. Her breasts were lush and warm, her breath warm and sweet. Her hand wrapped around my cock and I felt her shift downwards.
“No, Grace. Please…” The words came out as a ragged plea, not the order I intended. My hands, no longer in my control, wrapped in her hair. “Please, sweetheart…”
Her hands worked the length of me slowly, surprisingly strong. She nuzzled her face into my belly, only inches away… My hips jerked, working my cock against her palms. She rolled her thumb over the head and I gasped.
“Will you give me this, Kaine?” I jerked again as her breath hit bare skin. “I’m not asking for anything back. You don’t need to give. But I want you to let me do this for you.” Her tongue reached out, and I felt it hot and wet against my belly. “Can you let me…?”
She looked up at me, her eyes wide, lips apart, waiting for me. “Only if it’s what you want,” she said. “If you’ll let me give you this…”
I took her face gently between my hands, guiding her. I leaned back, sucking the breath through my teeth as her lips touched me. Ten long fucking years, and every second was worth the wait.
She took me inside her mouth and I was lost. She was hot and wet inside, licking and stroking. I felt her hands and her tongue like liquid fire. Her hands wrapped my hips, taking my buttocks in her hands, trapping me inside her. I held her shoulders in my hands, gripping them as she moved. Her breasts were crushed against the hard muscle of my thighs and she rode the movements of my body as I strained, thrusting and pulling back… working myself against her tight, swollen lips.
“Oh god, Grace…” my teeth were clenched, every muscle in my body tight and struggling for release. It had been so fucking long and she felt so fucking good. “Yes, sweetheart… just like that. Oh… just like that.” I was panting, my cock long and thick, getting harder with every stroke of her tongue. My balls were huge and pulled up tight. She let go of my cock and reached one little hand down to cup them tightly. “Fuck, Grace. Oh… fuck!”
I reached down, trying to pull her back. I didn’t want to shock her by coming in her mouth. But I felt her head shake no, and her grip on me tightened. She rocked her tongue back and forth over my head, then she pushed me in even deeper. I felt her throat muscles working against me then, her hands stroking, her throat swallowing… I was losing myself… losing myself… inside her…
The climax hit me, rolling over me and taking me under like a wave. My body shook as my cock pumped. I could feel the cum running from her mouth, soaking the bed under us. Jolt after jolt hit me and there was no stopping it. No controlling it. I let it flow through me, hot like fire, burning out everything except for her. We moved together, arching and turning. She matched me, thrust for thrust, pulling, pushing, forcing my body to give her everything it had. I felt her swallow, and swallow again. Taking my essence in, drinking me, sucking me, squeezing every drop I had.
I fell back, gasping, shocked at the power I felt flowing through me like a tidal wave. I pulled her up, wrapping her in my arms, crushing her to me as the feelings built up inside me. I didn’t begin to understand them and shook, overwhelmed. But I wanted it, I wanted every single second. “Grace,” I gasped out. “Sweetheart…”
A knock at the door shook us both. “Grace?” Bec called out loudly. “Are you up yet? I’ve got breakfast waiting…”
“I’m awake, Becca. Thank you,” she answered back unsteadily. “I’ll be down in a few minutes. I promise.”
We heard a snort on the other side of the door and we smiled conspiratorially at each other. I looked at her swollen lips and felt my cock throb in response.
“Mr. Kaine’s not answering his door. So help me, if that boy lets my good pancakes get cold…” Bec’s voice trailed off as she walked away, muttering.
I ran my thumb over Grace’s lips, the touch of them even hotter than ever now. I was already getting hard again.
She was so beautiful. More and more, I couldn’t remember how it felt, before I’d ever seen her face. She smiled, stroking my back underneath my robe. I kissed her, tasting the sweetness of her mouth and the salt of my body on her tongue. Then I pulled her up beside me, the length of her naked body pressed fully up against me.
“Did she say pancakes?” she asked, looking up into my eyes, hers sparkling. Teasing.
/> God, she was beautiful.
28
Grace
Kaine gave me a swat on my bare behind. “I’ll meet you downstairs,” he said, smiling. He looked brighter, younger somehow. I smiled back. “Five minutes… and not a second longer.”
He closed the door behind him, and I headed for a quick shower. My whole body was alive, racing with excitement. The water hit my skin and I gasped in delicious pleasure. And in the thrill of anticipation. I knew deep inside Kaine would take me. All of me. And soon.
It was inevitable.
No more than four and a half minutes later, I was taking my first mouthful of Becca’s pancakes. If I hadn’t been sitting, I’d have fallen. They melted in my mouth, the heady flavor of maple syrup making me bold. I reached out and forked three more pancakes onto the stack on my plate. Becca chuckled and put down a plateful of crisp bacon.
“I think you can read minds.” Kaine startled us both as he came into the dining room and planted a kiss on her cheek. She looked shocked and pleased all at once.
“Well, Mr. Kaine… You must have slept just fine,” she said, her eyes moving discreetly from him to me. “You look like a new man.” She put a pitcher of orange juice next to the bacon. “Must have been just what the doctor ordered…” I blushed hard and jammed another forkful of pancake into my mouth. Kaine smiled at me, watching my lips…
Becca headed back in the direction of the kitchen, calling back over her shoulder. “One of your guests called, Mr. Kaine. Said to expect them around noon. Oh… she said they’re bringing someone else along with them. A man named Carlson.” She stopped in the hall and looked back at us. “She said he’s not really well enough to come, but that she was sure you’d want to see him.”
Becca disappeared and Kaine and I were left staring at each other. I swallowed too soon and coughed.
“He’s coming here?” I coughed again. “He’s hurt so badly, and yet he wants to talk to you? He has to know the risk he’s taking…”
“Yet he’s willing to talk, even at the risk of his own life,” Kaine said, putting his hand over mine. “I was right. I fucking knew it. And Marks has finally had enough.”
He lifted my hand, pressing it to the side of his face. He turned it over and kissed my palm. His lips were warm and I felt my pussy clench hungrily. I remembered his mouth on me and was suddenly heated again and wet inside. “There may be no need to involve Rose or Dalia after all, if Marks is willing… and able to tell the whole story.”
“But what if he can’t, Kaine? If he was hurt too badly…”
“But he’s coming here… I have to believe he’s strong enough. He must want this very badly.”
“No more than any of us…,” I said, stroking Kaine’s jaw with a finger. It was rough with stubble and my body was responding like crazy. His jaw tensed and I could feel the heat, the current running between us just under the skin. Something inside him was pulling me closer, pulling me in. We were closer than we’d ever been, and I wanted so much more…
“When this is over, Grace... after Marks and the others have gone… We’re finally going to be alone…,” Kaine began, using his big, warm hands to shift me onto his lap. His cock was huge and ready underneath me and it was all I could do to keep on breathing. I’d had him in my mouth, feeling him, tasting him. He’d climaxed inside me and I wanted more. I needed to feel him buried deep in my pussy, thrusting and swelling, filling me until we both climaxed together. We were made for this. Surely he had to feel it too…
He teased my mouth with his lips, smiling. He was remembering this morning too. I knew it. “I want you. Tonight… in my bed.” He tugged at my lip with his teeth and I felt my panties dampen. “I trust you, I have trusted you, like I’ve never trusted anyone, Grace.”
“And I want you, more than I ever thought I could want a woman. You’re all I think about.” He touched his tongue to mine and it shot a straight line to my core. I was panting now.
“I’m going to have you tonight, Grace. Every fucking inch of you… in every possible way…” His breath was ragged too and our hearts were beating a frantic race. “I want you coming on my cock, sweetheart. I’m going to fill you until the only word you remember is my name. And I want to hear you say it when I’m buried deep inside you.” His hand cupped my sex and squeezed. My hips thrust into him and I felt his erection, hot and needy under me. “Neither of us are going to sleep tonight.” His thumb worked my clit in circles through my jeans. “I’ve waited a decade for this, for you…”
“I’ve waited a lifetime,” I gasped. I took his face between my hands, his lip between my teeth… biting down until he groaned.
“I love you, Kaine.”
I watched his face as he pulled back, knowing I’d crossed another line. But I couldn’t take it back. And I didn’t want to. It was true and he had to know.
His eyes were grey. Warm and deep, deep grey. He was silent, looking at me. All the way inside. And I was wide open. To everything he was… to whatever his response. I had given him my truth.
He smiled, wrapping his arms around me. He took a breath to speak, and paused. Then he kissed me softly, quietly. “Tonight, Grace,” he said.
“Tonight.”
Kaine left me in the library with my pulse beating hard and fast in my chest, and headed for the shower. How the hell was I going to get through this day? I felt every minute pass like an hour. And knowing Kaine was naked and wet right now wasn’t helping…
I paced the room, eager for the day ahead to be long behind us. For the chance to clear Evelyn’s name so maybe she could start all over again. For Cole to finally face justice for all the pain he’d caused. For Marks to tell the truth. And for Kaine and me too… to begin to heal all the old scars from the past.
I sat down at the enormous desk and ran my fingers over the phone. Then I shoved my hesitation aside and dialed before I could talk myself out of it. The phone rang twice before he answered.
“Mr. Moore? It’s Grace. Grace Clarey. Evelyn Tolman’s daughter.”
“Of course, of course, Grace. It’s been a couple of weeks since I’ve heard from you.” He cleared his throat. “Nothing’s changed, I’m afraid. Trial begins on the thirtieth.”
“I was wondering… if there’s anything you could do, Mr. Moore. I haven’t talked to her in a while… and I was just wondering… if maybe you could pull a few strings…?”
“I… of course, Grace. She’s doing surprisingly well, all things considered, but I know she’d want to hear from you.” I heard papers shuffling. “I’ll just make a few calls… Can I reach you at this number?”
“Yes, sir,” I answered, feeling a wave of anxiety in my belly. “I’m here for the next day or two, I expect…”
“I’m on it, Grace. I’ll do everything I can.”
The phone went silent and I sat back in the big chair, remembering the last time I’d seen Evelyn. It was at her preliminary hearing. She’d had dark circles under her eyes and her roots were growing out. The grey made her look older. And tired. She’d looked so tired.
“I’m so sorry, Gracie,” she’d said, her head in her hands. “I never wanted this life for us, baby. Not for me. Never for you.” She’d looked up, her eyes rimmed with red. “I don’t remember doing this, honey. I was at Bender’s that night, just for a drink before I headed home.” She’d shaken her head, closing her eyes. “I’d met a guy. He was real nice. You know. All dressed in a nice suit. Not the type that place usually draws at all.” She’d taken my hands in hers. At the time, I’d pulled away. I remembered it now, and felt ashamed.
“He had such good manners, you know? I wanted to stay a little longer, just to see where it could go. We had a couple of drinks… I swear it wasn’t more than that… And I just don’t remember anything after that…”
At the time, I’d been so angry. I’d shot out something bitter and ugly. After that I’d seen her in court from a distance, but we hadn’t really spoken again.
I felt something like desperation
rising to the surface now. There was no way I could tell her about Cole, or Carlson Marks. There were still so many things that could go wrong, and I didn’t dare get her hopes up. But I needed to talk to her. I had to hear her voice. I wanted to tell her…
The phone rang harshly and I started in my chair. I looked at it, wondering if I should answer. I grabbed it anyway, thinking fast. “Hello? Arkaine residence…”
“I… I’m sorry… Maybe I dialed the wrong number…”
“Mom? It’s Grace, Mom. Is that you?” I glanced at the clock. Twenty minutes. Moore was worth his fees.
“Gracie? The guard said I had a phone call. He said it was my lawyer…”
“I called him, Mom. I just wanted to talk to you… To see if you’re alright.” It took effort to keep the emotion out of my voice. I couldn’t remember the last time it had felt so good to hear her voice. “Are you sleeping? Do you need anything?”
“Oh, honey… I’m okay. It’s hard, but I’m doing okay. The counselor comes twice a week, and she’s good people.” I heard her swallow and pause. “What about you, honey? Are you still… at that… place? Are you alright, Grace?”
“I’m fine, Mom,” My throat felt tight, constricted. “I’m not at La Laisse anymore. I’m staying with a friend… It’s gonna be alright, Mom. We have everything we need now, and it’s going to be alright.”
It was quiet on the other end of the line. When she finally spoke, I could tell how much effort it took. “I’m going to make it right between us, honey. Somehow… someday, I’m going to make it right. I’m so fucking sorry. For dragging you through this. For everything you gave up for me…”
I was quiet too then.
“Gracie,” I heard her say. “I wasn’t ever the mother you needed, the kind of mother you always deserved. But I do love you, Tink. And I want you to know I always will.”
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