Abbadon lunged at Abigor, grabbing him by the collar and yanking him forward until they were nose to nose. “You’re a fool. An idiotic fool. She was safe with the Protectorate.”
“Really? Because when I found her she had a broken arm and had just escaped from The Breed.”
“Escaped. She had escaped. Don’t you see? The daggers are protecting her, and when they cannot, then Bane will certainly do so. But here she is in terrible danger. Not to mention the fact she was almost killed. If I hadn’t been returning at this very moment …” He released Abigor, his lip curling in disgust. “She isn’t safe here.”
Abigor frowned. “What are you talking about? She is in the midst of Fallen. She could not be any safer. We can give her a room without windows.”
Abbadon stepped back, hands on hips. “You think the White Wings do not watch us? That they do not have spies in Midnight who report back our every action?”
Abigor snapped his mouth closed, his eyes shifting from side to side as he made some connection that I was clueless about.
“Oh, Lord,” Malphas whispered.
“Yes, take the lord’s name now, Malphas. I am disappointed you did not insist she be returned immediately. You are, after all, my second in command. But it seems you have grown soft.”
Malphas shook his head. “If the White Wings discover we have kidnapped a nephilim, and that she is staying here with us, then they will question why. They will test and probe and there is a chance they will discover the existence of the daggers.”
“It is why I left her to Bane in the first place, although I made it seem as if it were his choice to keep her.”
“I am certain that we were not seen,” Abigor said.
“Except by the kelpie I summoned,” I pointed out. My heart was racing. Did this mean what I thought it meant?
Abigor waved a hand. “Kelpies are nephilim, and they belong to us.”
“I must take her back.” Abbadon reached for my hand just as a whirlwind of muscle and rage landed on the balcony.
Bane.
He was here. On the fucking balcony, and man, he looked pissed. My body acted on autopilot, rushing toward him on instinct, knowing exactly where it wanted to be. He gathered me up into his arms, holding me to his side protectively. His huge bat wings flexed at his back, but he didn’t fold them. He was ready to take off, ready to escape with me.
Abbadon held up both hands. “I was about to return her, Bane. I swear it.”
I inhaled his scent. It smelled like home.
“Harker?” Bane asked.
I opened my eyes. “Yes. Abbadon was planning on bringing me back.”
“Where’s Drayton?” Bane asked.
I tensed. “The Breed had us. Drayton didn’t make it.” I’d tell him everything, just not here, just not while the Black Wings watched. My chest burned with the shame and guilt of it.
Bane’s body shuddered, and his arm tightened around me. “I thought I made my position clear the last time your henchman tried to take her.”
Abbadon’s jaw clenched. “It was an error in judgment.”
Abigor stepped forward. “We all want the same thing. We all want to protect her. And if you were doing a better job of it, I wouldn’t have needed to step in.”
Bane’s muscles flexed around me. “Did he hurt you?”
There was silence. Oh, he was speaking to me again. “No. He didn’t. My arm was broken and Malphas healed me. Aside from holding me against my will, they’ve been kind.”
Bane’s throat bobbed. “You touch her again, and I will tear your wings from your body. Am I clear?”
Abigor’s eyes narrowed. “Do not presume to speak to me that way. You are a nephilim, nothing more than an errand boy, you—”
“Enough, Abigor!” Abbadon ordered. “You were wrong. We had a deal and you broke it. Apologize to Bane. Do it now.”
Abigor’s nostrils flared, his gaze seared a path across my face, and then he slammed out of the room.
Bane pulled me close. “The wind is high. Wrap yourself around me and hold tight.” He hoisted me up, and I clung to him, not caring how intimate the position was. Instead, I reveled in the beat of his heart against my chest and the thud of his pulse against my face. And then we were airborne, and I could finally breathe.
We were going home.
***
The lounge fire crackled as the flames danced, casting eerie shadows on the wall. There was silence in the room following my story—absolute, utter silence. And then Cassie began to sob softly. Orin cursed under his breath and Ryker slipped his hand into mine and squeezed. Bane had found me by chance. He’d found me with no help from the kelpies. I’d been lucky he’d done a sweep of the coast, lucky he’d flown as far as the Black Wing manor and heard my voice on the wind. And now they knew the truth. They knew that Drayton was dead. They knew I’d killed him, and they knew that even though I’d saved the two kelpies’ lives, Killion had broken my arm and left me for dead.
Bane cleared his throat. “You did what you had to, Harker. No one here blames you for what happened.”
“He’s right,” Orin said. “I blame Max. We can’t let this go unanswered. We can’t let Max get away with this. He murdered Drayton. He put Harker in a position to have to…” His words choked off. “Drayton was one of us. He was family.”
I blinked my stinging eyelids but kept my gaze fixed on the coffee table. “We need to go back. We need to find Drayton and bring him home.”
Rivers stood up. “I’ll grab a team and head to Desert Rock. See if we can find the entrance, see if I can find him.”
I made to stand. “I’m coming with you.”
“No.” Bane pressed a large hand to my shoulder, holding me down. “Rivers can handle this. You’ve been through enough.”
He didn’t want me to see Drayton again, to see what I’d done to him. I squeezed my eyes shut and quelled my arguments, because the cowardly part of me, the part where my nightmares were born, didn’t want to go back either.
“They’d have sealed it by now,” Ryker said. “They know Serenity and the kelpies escaped. They’re probably expecting them to come back with reinforcements. But Drayton … They may have left him behind.” Ryker’s throat bobbed. “I’m coming with you.”
Rivers nodded curtly.
Ryker released my hand. “I’ll be back soon.” He pressed a kiss to the side of my head and then followed Rivers out of the room.
Cassie stood up.
“Where are you going?” Orin asked.
“To see Killion.”
Orin made a sound of exasperation. “What the fuck is wrong with you? He tried to kill Harker.”
She focused her teary gaze on me and caught her bottom lip between her teeth. “I’m sorry, Serenity. I really am. I just … I have to make sure he’s all right.” She blinked back tears. “Maybe I can find out what happened to them? Why The Breed took them?”
“You walk out that door and we’re through,” Orin said levelly.
Her eyes widened a fraction, and then she exhaled slowly and her expression smoothed out. “I guess we’re through then.”
She strode out of the room.
Orin dropped his head into his hands.
Bane sighed heavily. “Harker, these came for you while you were missing.” He pulled two envelopes from his pocket. “We opened them, hoping for clues as to your whereabouts.” He handed me the letters.
One was a thick, creamy envelope with my name in fancy font on the front, and the other was Jesse’s handwriting. I shucked the letter out and scanned it.
Dear Serenity,
This is the last time you’ll hear from me. Not because I’m mad at you, because I’m not, not anymore. I get why you said what you did, why you acted so horribly toward me. You were trying to protect me. I want you to know you don’t have to worry anymore. I’m silvered. You’ve found your place and now I’ve found mine. I’m happy here. I finally feel safe and at peace. Please be happy for me.
Your
sister,
Jesse
It took the words a moment to sink in, then a yawning chasm opened up inside me. She was gone. Truly gone. She’d joined the ranks of the silvered, tipping the scales toward humanity’s loss. I’d seen the fervent light in her eyes on more than one occasion when the White Wings had been mentioned. I’d noticed her excitement every time the silvered had walked amongst us. Maybe if I’d been permitted to stay with her, she’d have resisted the call, and maybe she would have caved regardless. It didn’t matter.
“I need to get her back.”
Bane blinked down at me.
“I need to get into Dawn. I need to get her out.”
“You read her letter,” Bane said. “She made a choice.”
I jerked my arm from his grasp. “A choice to give up all choices. Ever. She doesn’t know what she’s doing. She doesn’t understand. I need to get her out. There has to be a way to get her out.”
Bane’s eyes narrowed as if he was contemplating something, and then he shook his head. “I’m sorry, Harker. There is no way. Dawn is airtight and in lockdown. To attempt to breach their district would result in serious backlash for Midnight.”
My heart sank.
“You must respect your sister’s decision.”
I screwed up the letter and flung it at the flames. “Fuck this. Just fuck it all.”
Orin sighed. “I’m sorry, Harker.”
“Open the other envelope,” Ryker said.
I snorted. “What more bad news could I possibly get?”
But I did as he suggested and slid the card from the cream envelope. It was an invite to the house games—a reminder of my deal with Dorian. There was a letter inside.
Dear Miss Harker,
The House of Mort has agreed to allow you to take part in the games. The rules are simple. Collect more flags than the House of Vitae and survive the seventy-two hours.
I look forward to your demise.
Dorian
The anger pulsed and then receded a fraction. Yes. I had to win the games and save humans. I had to keep my word to the blonde girl in Dorian’s clutches.
Bane plucked the card from my fingers. “I’ll speak to him and set this straight.”
“No.” The word fell softly from my numb lips.
“You need to get some rest,” Orin said.
“No.” Louder this time. “I need to train for the games.”
“Harker…” Orin sighed. “Let Bane deal with this.”
I stood up, my body stiff. “Drayton is dead. My sister is gone, and there is nothing I can do about those things. Nothing. I can’t help them. I can’t raise Drayton from the dead, and I can’t get my sister back because there is no way into Dawn. But the humans contracted to the House of Vitae do want my help. They want to be free, and isn’t free will what it’s all about?” I locked gazes with Bane.
His eyes narrowed. “Free will?”
“Yes. Free will.” I needed him to know that I knew about the test too. I needed him to understand what I was saying. “Isn’t it enough that the White Wings are taking humanity’s free will? Are we going to allow House of Vitae to do the same?” I took a step toward him, turning my face up to look into his ferocious one. “I can do this, Bane. With your help, I know I can. I will win, but I need you to help me.” I raised my hands palm-up to expose the undersides of my wrists. “I need you to help me connect with my demon.”
He gently grasped my wrists and ran his thumbs over the tattoos. “You’ve spent years fighting your hunger. Why cave now?”
“Because now I know that accepting my darkness is the only way I can be whole. It’s the only way to have control of the daggers. If I’d had control when The Breed took us …” My voice cracked. “If I’d had control then, I could have cut my way out of the cage sooner, and Drayton would still be alive.” The back of my nose and throat stung with the need to break down. “Help me. Please.”
Bane’s grip on my arms tightened a fraction, and he nodded. “Go get some rest. We’ll begin training tomorrow.”
***
Alone in my room, I crawled onto my bed, curled up, and closed my eyes. If I was going to succeed, the dam would have to break. I’d have to remember, and then I needed to move forward.
Drayton’s face filled my mind. His horrified gaze sliced through my heart as I plunged the daggers into his ribs. His warm brown eyes filled my mind as he told me to run. I let go, allowing the grief to wash over me. Guilt and sorrow and anger wracked my body.
My fault. Mine.
I’d been stubborn and refused to listen to Ambrosius, and I’d lost Drayton. My body shook with uncontrollable sobs that tore at my throat. I was broken, shattering into a thousand pieces, and then the bed behind me dipped and a warm body enveloped me.
Bane’s scent filled my nostrils. He pulled me toward him, my back to his chest. “It will be all right. I promise it will be all right.”
“It hurts …”
“I know. But the pain will recede. It will get better.”
He said the words with such conviction that a part of me almost believed him, but how could it be true? How could this tumult of guilt and agony ever go away? “It won’t. It will never get better. Drayton is dead because of me, and my sister is silvered because I pushed her away.”
He sat up. “Get up.”
I rolled to face him. “What?”
“Get up and put your boots on. We’re going to Dawn.”
Chapter 12
We flew high above the city, over Midnight and into Sunset, where the warmth of the sun kissed my cheeks like a blessing. My eyes watered, assaulted by the brightness. And then we were sailing close to Dawn. It was dark ahead—real night—because in Dawn, the winged enjoyed both the sun and the moon. The orange rays receded, and I blinked away the moisture, able to see properly again. Bane hung back amongst the mist, where we had a splendid view of the pearly gates. They rose up so high, a short dip would allow us to brush against them even from this height.
“What are they made of?”
“Pearl,” Bane said. “It’s a material used excessively on the divine plane but one that I find is rare on the mortal one.”
Lights scanned the night on a regular circuit. Looking for intruders and keeping watch on the residents.
Bane hovered with me in his arms. “We can’t go in this way. The gates are always guarded, but there is a blind spot.”
His wings beat at our backs as he rode the wind, keeping a good distance between us and Dawn. We left Sunset behind and were engulfed in the natural night of the White Wings’ district.
“Hold tight and stay tucked in,” he whispered into my hair.
We were doing this, really doing this.
“One, two, three.” He dove.
I bit back a scream as we streaked beneath the beams, up and over, and down again. He flew like a master, taking my breath with every twist and turn of his body and every shift in the air as he changed gears. And then, we were landing softly on the ground.
He didn’t release me, but loosened his grip enough to allow me to take in my surroundings. We were tucked into an alley, squashed up against a brick wall. Beyond the mouth of the alley sat a stone well and a cobbled square. An iron post with a lamp on top lit the square with warm light.
It looked like something out of a historical novel. The Victorian era … Yeah, it reminded me of those paintings and books that I’d pored over in the library. This was Dawn? This was how they lived? It made no sense. They had such power at their disposal. They provided Sunset with electrical goods all the time, and yet they used none here?
I leaned in to Bane. “Why is it so old-fashioned?”
He sighed against my ear. “The White Wings believe that technology corrupts. Ironic, because they use it in the towers overlooking the silvered dwellings. They just feel that humans should live a basic life. Grind their own wheat and sew their own clothes, that kind of thing. Idle hands lead to anarchy, after all.” His tone was laced with bitternes
s.
Jesse had chosen this over Sunset. I had to get her out. She obviously had no idea what she was doing. I’d left her, pushed her away, and she was confused, looking for direction in a place that promised security and safety.
“Okay, stick close and remain in the shadow,” Bane said. “The fledgling house is across the square.”
“How do you know this?”
He exhaled through his nose. “Who do you think helped build this district?”
“Nephilim?”
He nodded. “When we first came here. When Arcadia was first born.”
It was the first time he’d openly admitted to knowing of a world outside of this city, of being from the mysterious wide world beyond. There were so many questions …
“Don’t. It will only make it harder to live if you know what it is you are missing. Trust me on that.”
“Fine. But why did you help the White Wings build this place if you hate it so much?”
“I don’t hate it. It’s a way of life, and if some choose it, then so be it. I just don’t believe that humanity should be forced into it. That was the whole point of this experiment. It was to show the White Wings that, on the whole, humanity would prefer to be free to forge their own path and to make their own decisions.” He held out his hand. “Are you ready?”
I nodded and slipped my hand into his. We set off across the square, running from one pocket of darkness to the next. The small, compact buildings surrounding the well were lit from within with flickering light—candles, no doubt. The fledgling house came into view—a proud three-story affair with grand double doors and three neat steps leading up to them.
A gust of air brushed against my face in warning, and then the flap of wings followed.
“Shit.” Bane tugged me all the way across the square and into the alley beside the fledgling building just as two huge White Wings landed in the square.
They flexed their wings and laughed.
“Will she be willing, do you think?” one asked the other.
“It matters not. She must submit to my will.”
The other one chuckled. “Mine is enraptured with me. She opens for me with stars in her pretty eyes, and she tastes sweet and fresh.”
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