Unable to resist his simple charm, she put her hand over his on the steering wheel and leaned into his side. “I hope so.”
After dropping Ragan off at her parent’s house, Mark drove out to the quarry. While growing up in the area, the quarry had been the place to hang out in the summer. No matter what the air temperature, the water always felt cool and refreshing, drawing kids from around the county. He sat, leaning against a rock and tossing pebbles into the water, thinking about the events of the evening. He understood that Ragan thought she still loved Adam, but he knew he could change her mind if she gave him a chance.
As he listened to the pebbles sprinkle onto the surface, he tried to think of ways he could get the woman of his dreams to fall in love with him. Eventually, she would realize what was right in front of her. I can do this. I can be there for her. I’ll start slow, and eventually she’ll see me as more than just a friend…
Chapter 15
Early the next morning, Ragan snuggled under the covers after she awoke and enjoyed the silence. According to the note she found on the counter when she finally ventured out for coffee, her mom and dad had taken Skylar down to the diner for breakfast; they had wanted to let Robbie and Ragan sleep in after their late night.
She smiled as she recalled Mark’s kiss. He had treated her with respect, like a princess. Then the scene between Robbie and Adam replayed in her mind, and she remembered the look of betrayal on Adam’s face. I guess I did betray him. I kept his son a secret from him for over two years.
Robbie stumbled into the kitchen and ambled over to the coffeepot. “Let me get some caffeine before you start in on me,” he offered. “God, my head feels like it’s going to roll right off my shoulders. Actually, right now I wish it would.” He poured himself a mug of the steaming liquid and sat down at the table, rubbing his eyes and grimacing with an obvious hangover.
Ragan noticed the slight puffiness of his face, a telling sign that last night was not the only night that he had gotten drunk. From the look of his features, it had been going on for quite some time.
“It serves you right. What the hell were you thinking?” She stood over him, yelling despite his discomfort, “Why would you do that to me?” The waterworks started as she turned too fast on her weakened ankle in order to escape upstairs before she said something she’d regret. Double pain.
“Please don’t cry, Ragan,” Robbie said softly, “You know I can’t stand it when you do.” That made her spin on her good foot and look him in the eye where she saw the shadow again.
“What did you expect, shouting out my secret in front of the whole pub? I’m sure Mom and Dad are getting an earful at the diner this morning.” Ragan sat next to him at the table and put her head in her hands. “I wish I could’ve warned them before they left, but I was still asleep after lying awake all night worrying about what they’re going to say.”
“Everything was weighing on me, so I got drunk to try and forget about all of it,” he offered the excuse. “We both know how well that worked.”
“What do you mean by everything? Is it your job? Is that why you came home?” She glared at him, not liking that he looked away instead of at her.
“You’re going to make me tell you, aren’t you?” he asked, knowing that was exactly what she’d do. Ragan never let him get off that easy. “How about some more coffee? God, what was I thinking?”
They both jumped in their seats at the sound of the front door slamming. “Robert Allen Newlin, I want to talk to you right now!” Peggy’s voice echoed through the structure.
Robbie’s expression shifted to one of horror; the announcement left little doubt their mother had heard about the scene at the club. Ragan tried to sneak out through the utility room, but their mom was too smart for that. “And where do you think you’re going, Ragan Louise? Someone better fill me in about what happened last night. I’ve already heard three different versions, so I’ll know if you leave something out. Details and the whole truth, kids. Robbie, you start…”
Three hours later, Ragan limped back downstairs to the kitchen for a soda; worn out from the long conversation with her mom, she really needed the caffeine. She spotted Robbie trying to leave via the back door. “Hold it, buster; we’re not done yet.”
“Shit,” he muttered under his breath. “I knew I should have left while you were in the shower,” he said aloud with a groan.
“We’re alone here. It’s time you and I had a serious talk, Robbie. Come clean. What’s up with you? I can tell it’s something big; you know you can talk to me about anything.”
“I don’t want to talk about it. Can’t you just leave it alone, Ragan?”
“Nope, not after what happened at the bar last night. I’ve never seen you that drunk before, not even in college. You’re not leaving until you tell me what’s bothering you.”
“I can’t,” he whispered as he turned again to leave the room.
She seized his arm and tried to spin him around to face her, recognizing the pain on his face. “Come on, Robbie Robot; tell me what’s up.”
“Don’t call me that. You know I hate it when you use that name.”
“Well, then tell me what the problem is; maybe I can help.” Now that the siblings were both upset, she was glad their parents had taken Sky to the mall.
Robbie looked at her with sorrow in his eyes, “No one can help. I’ve got to work through this on my own.”
“Dammit, Robbie; you’re not leaving this kitchen until you tell me. I can’t stand seeing you like this. I know it’s gotta be something big. Just tell me,” she implored.
“I can’t tell you now. Maybe later.” Yanking himself free from her grasp, he slammed the door on his way out, ignoring or maybe not seeing the look of confusion on Ragan’s face.
Chapter 16
Ragan pulled into a parking spot on the square, nervous about introducing Skylar to James. She worried that if Logan were there, he would see the truth in her eyes. She had to make sure no one learned the whole truth; not her family, not Logan or Cassie, and especially not Adam. Squaring her shoulders, she picked up her son and marched into the sheriff’s office.
Maureen glanced up from her desk at the sound of the door opening, “About time you came by, Ragan Newlin. Come here and let me see that handsome young man.”
Ragan smiled, “Skylar, this is Aunt Mo.” She put her mouth up to his ear and whispered, “She keeps the best cookies in her desk. If you ask nicely, she might give you one.”
Skylar grinned. “Have cookies?”
“Yes, I do,” Maureen replied as she reached into her bottom drawer and pulled out a bag of homemade chocolate chip cookies.
“Pweese?”
“Of course,” she replied as she handed one to him with a huge satiated grin.
“Did I hear somebody say cookies?” James asked as he strode over to Maureen’s desk while eyeing the toddler. “No wonder Robbie figured it out. Hard to mistake those blue eyes.” James reached over and held his hands out to Skylar, grinning when he practically jumped out of Maureen’s arms into his. “I miss Olivia being this age. Everything is so simple to them.”
Ragan smiled as she opened a package of wet wipes to clean the chocolate off Skylar’s face. While she applied the damp cloth, he reached for something behind her, almost throwing himself out of James’ arms. She turned and found Logan standing there, his frown exposing deep wrinkles across his forehead.
James put Skylar down and he ran to Logan, stopping and staring up at him. When he giggled, Logan smiled, unable to resist.
“Skylar, this is your…” she looked over at Logan, waiting for his reaction.
“Uncle Logan,” the deputy finished for her as he swung the child up into his arms and situated him up on his shoulders. “Have you talked to Adam yet?”
“No. That’s my next stop,” she admitted as she shoved her hands in her pockets to hide their shaking.
“He’s working in the studio at the pub this morning. He’ll be there all day.” Logan galloped around
the room, holding Skylar’s hands tight and making the boy giggle in delight.
“More, Unca Logan, more.”
After allowing a couple of trips around the office, Ragan reached for Skylar, knowing she couldn’t put off talking to Adam any longer. “I guess I’d better get over there. Come on, big boy; we need to go.”
As she turned to leave, she looked back and saw the frown again on Logan’s face. She hated having to lie to everyone, but it was her only option. Taking Skylar’s hand, she trudged to the door, knowing she had to face Adam and tell another lie about her reasons for leaving.
They meandered down the sidewalk toward the club, looking in all the windows along the way. She tried to put off the inevitable, until she stood in front of the door to the pub. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly to settle her nerves, hoping she could hold it together until this part was over.
The interior appeared larger with all the lights on. Only a couple of customers dotted the seats, there for an early lunch. The jukebox played Unchained Melody in the background, and Mike worked behind the bar, taking inventory. “Hey, Ragan. You here for lunch?” She could hear the forced tone in his voice, and his eyes avoided her, as if he were trying not to stare. Obviously, he knew why she was there.
“No, I need to talk to Adam. Is he here?”
“He’s back in the office. Down the hall, first door on the right.”
“Thanks, Mike.”
The hallway seemed to go on for miles as she made her way to the office door. Her heels clicking on the tile floor echoed in the long corridor. Skylar’s warm fingers in hers kept her from turning around and running out of the pub. She put her hand on the doorknob and took a deep breath, calming herself before she faced Adam. Looking down at Skylar, she smiled. No matter what happened with his father or others in town, she would never regret him.
Before she could turn the knob, the door swung open, pulling her into the office. She stumbled and put her hand out to catch herself, grabbing hold of a muscular arm. “Thanks. My ankle still isn’t too steady.”
“No problem,” Adam replied as he stared at Skylar.
Her cheeks burned at the sound of Adam’s voice, “I, uh, I think we need to talk.” She stared at the floor, hoping a hole would open up and she could jump in; she hated the effect Adam’s mere presence still had on her. Anxiously, she lifted her son onto her hip and faced him.
He stood there, silent, arms crossed; “Go ahead. Talk.”
“Skylar, baby, you remember Adam?”
“Snow,” Skylar screeched with a smile.
“Yes, that’s right. Adam rescued us during the snowstorm.” She inhaled a deep breath to organize her thoughts. “Skylar, Adam is your daddy.”
“My daddy?”
“Yes, baby.”
Skylar seemed to accept the explanation and wiggled in his mother’s arms. As soon as she had placed his feet on the floor, he walked toward the guitar sitting on a stand next to the chair. He stopped in front of it and turned slightly, looking over his shoulder as if to ask permission to touch it.
“No, Sky, leave it alone.”
Adam walked over and sat in the chair, “Do you want to see the guitar?” he asked as he held his hand out.
Skylar nodded, never taking his eyes off the instrument.
Adam picked up the boy and put him on his lap before laying the guitar flat across their laps and plucking at one of the strings. Skylar giggled and reached over to touch the metal bands, turning to Adam for approval again when he pulled at one of the strings and let it go to hear it twang.
Ragan couldn’t read the expression on Adam’s face. It seemed to be a cross between anger and love. “We need to talk about visitation,” she said with a hitch in her voice on the word visitation.
“Why don’t you leave him with me for a few hours and we can get acquainted. When you come back, we can talk about the schedule.” He smiled back down at Skylar, affection in his eyes.
“Okay, I guess,” she replied as she pulled her phone out of a pocket to check the time. “I’ll be back by three. Here’s my cell number.” She fumbled for one of her freshly printed business cards and laid it on the table. She leaned down and kissed Skylar on the head. “Have fun with Adam and the music, Sky. Momma will be back soon.”
The click of the door closing behind her sounded so final that tears formed in the corners of her eyes. Hobbling down the hall and out the door, she tried to outrun the memories. Stupid, Ragan. Keep it up and the ankle won’t ever heal. Not caring what direction she headed and only needing to get away, she looked up and saw a sign: The Book Ends Here. Cassie’s bookstore. Slumping down on the bench in front of the store, she put her head in her hands. Her thoughts turned to Liam; he would’ve been so happy to see Adam and Skylar together. She missed him; he always knew what to say to make her feel better.
“Ragan? You okay?” Cassie asked when she noticed the blonde sitting outside her shop.
“No. Oh my God, what have I done?”
“Come on, Ragan; let’s go in and sit in my office where it’s private. I’m sure you don’t want to share what’s wrong out here in public.” She took Ragan’s hand, pulling her to her feet and into the store. “Mel, can you watch things for a while?”
“Sure, Cassie. Take your time. I’ll holler if I need anything.”
Ragan stood there and listened to their exchange while the tears trickled down her face in rivulets. A huge hole had replaced her heart; there would be no use in denying it.
Cassie ushered her into the office, shutting the door behind them before leading her to the couch in front of the window. “Now, tell me what’s wrong. Is it Skylar? Your parents?”
“Everyone is fine, except for me. I just left Skylar with Adam.”
“Don’t you trust him? I’m sure Skylar will be fine.”
“It’s not that I don’t trust him. I’d trust him with Skylar’s life. I know how he feels about family and now he knows that Skylar is his family.”
“Then what?” Cassie asked as she lifted the box of Kleenex from her desk. “Why are you so upset?”
“It was how he looked at me. The hate in his eyes.” She blew her nose and dabbed at her tears. “How could I have kept Skylar from him all this time? What kind of person does that make me?”
“You were heartbroken. I don’t know that I would have reacted any differently.”
“I didn’t want to, but…” she stopped when she realized what she almost said.
“Didn’t want to what?” Cassie asked with a look of concern.
“Never mind. I don’t even remember what I was going to say.” She looked at her phone and discovered she still had almost two hours until she could pick up Sky. “How about some lunch? My treat.”
“You’ll eventually tell me what’s going on. I know there’s something you’re holding back; I know you too well,” Cassie pocketed her phone and held out both hands to pull Ragan up off the couch. “Let’s go to the diner. Their chocolate crème pie will put a smile on your face.”
Ragan followed Cassie out of the bookstore and down the street, vowing to herself that she would never reveal her biggest secret—the real reason for leaving so long ago.
Chapter 17
Two days later Ragan moved into the rented house that Logan owned while still wondering at how she had ended up there. There, as in Fairfield Corners and there, as in Logan’s house, where she’d spent so much time three years ago with Adam.
Mark pulled her suitcase out of the back of her car as she unlocked the door and let it swing open. When they entered the living room, it was shrouded in shadows as if it were waiting for the sun to shine again. Some of the furniture had changed, but the memories were still there, most notably the one of the love she had shared with Adam. She successfully fought the tears, not wanting to explain to Mark about the memories in this place.
Pulling open the curtains, she smiled as light filtered into the living room. She spotted an empty corner of the room that would be pe
rfect for Skylar’s toys. He was going to be unmanageably spoiled if her mom and dad didn’t quit buying him a new toy every time they took him anywhere. However, she felt grateful that Skylar would be staying with her mom and dad on this particular night; she needed time to organize a few things, and some private time to reflect might help, too.
Several hours later, everything had been unpacked and put away, since the bulk of their belongings still resided in London. She had given away most of the possessions she had from her marriage to Liam, since she had never been one to collect a lot of material things, and what little remained would eventually have to be dealt with; but not today.
Mark had offered to stay and help for a while, but he received a call from the hospital and had to leave. Ragan had mixed feelings when she sent him off with a kiss; sorry to see him leave, but ready to spend time alone. She believed that Mark would gladly help her make new memories and keep the old ones in the past, where they belonged. After the way Adam had looked at her when she took Skylar to meet him, she finally admitted to herself that she had to move on. Mark still wanted to date her, even knowing how she still felt about Adam. A good and caring man, dating Mark seemed right.
She sat on the couch and turned on the TV, flipping through the channels. Nothing captured her interest, so she shut it off and wandered around the house, letting the memories guide her. She remembered the first time Adam had brought her there.
It was about a week after Cassie and Logan’s wedding. They were so tired and becoming slap-happy, tripping over each other to get in the door and stopping every few steps for a kiss. Adam picked her up and threw her on the bed, telling her to wait right there as he walked towards the bathroom. She really tried to stay awake, but she was so tired that she fell asleep almost instantly.
When she woke up, she was still lying on top of the covers with Adam’s arm and a leg draped over her. She turned her head to the side and watched him sleep. That’s the moment when she fell completely in love with him. Closing her eyes, she visualized the two of them dancing slowly in a room full of people. She was in a long white dress and Adam was in a tux. Logan was on a stage, singing a song she had never heard before.
Ragan's Song (Fairfield Corners #2) Page 6
