His eyes. Those rainforest-green eyes penetrated her like never before, and then suddenly his thoughts came swirling through her mind like a baseball bat.
Her mouth fell open as she heard his fear for her safety, the drowning incident being played over and over again in his head. The thought of losing her, his one anchor in his life, this woman who made him laugh after years of having no one. How she made him feel whole again, that she believed in him. His betrayal weighed heavily on his mind, but she didn’t hate him for it, instead she understood. His hurt that she had thrown them away, didn’t trust what they shared. And then . . . then she was encompassed by the love that he felt. How he loved her and it was killing him to let her go like she had asked.
Then just as suddenly as his thoughts flooded her mind, they were gone and he released her shoulders, put the car in drive and skidded it forward, all without saying a single word.
She was too thunderstruck to speak. What could she say to a man’s most inner thoughts? To hear that he loved you, that it was destroying him that she had given up on them. What she felt was scared as hell. Terrified that she was going to have to throw away her safety net and jump into the open space of the unknown. If she wanted to keep him, then she had to let go of her commitment issues and take the chance. And it was one hell of a chance when he still could be killed or sent to Rest after all this was said and done. Could she let her heart be broken? But wasn’t it already breaking? What if they had only mere weeks left together? Would she regret not spending their last days together sharing the love that was between them?
“Pull over,” Danielle ordered. He ignored her and she put her hand on the gearshift. “Pull over or I’ll jam this BMW into park and let the transmission dump out onto the highway.”
Balen took his time bringing the car to a stop this time. He let it idle while his hands gripped the steering wheel like it was his lifeline.
Here goes nothing. Jump with both feet or you will trip and fall. “I like you a lot,” she said. Okay, that was so wrong. “No, well, yes that’s true but what I meant was that I . . . well, I care a lot about you.” He still didn’t look at her, obviously waiting for the but thing. “I want to spend eternity with you whether that is a few days or a few hundred years.” Wow, did she just say that? “I’m jumping here, Balen. and I so need you to catch me.” She waited. And waited. Shit, was it too late? Was he so angry with her that he was refusing to give her a second chance? “I just get scared, okay? My father . . . he and my mother loved one another so much. They were inseparable and then when my mom died of lung cancer, well, it destroyed him. He was never the same, lost in his own world until finally he couldn’t take it anymore and put a gun to his head.
“I found him in his office.” She rubbed her arms at the thought as a cold shiver crawled over her body. “I never want that kind of love.” She reached over and put her hand on his arm. She guessed it was a good sign when he didn’t move away. “I don’t ever want that to happen to me. To love so much that I can’t go on without that person.” She sighed. “I’m terrified that when they finally take you away, I won’t be able to go on. I’ll fall so hard that I won’t be able to get back up again.”
“You’re not your father, Danielle,” Balen said. “You’ll go on because that is what is in your soul. A fighter. A survivor. The most courageous woman I know. And you will never lose me. No matter what happens, I will always be there, whether as I am now or as a scent in the wind. I won’t ever leave you and you will go on if that is what fate has decided for us.”
Tears slid down her cheeks and dropped off her chin. Balen put his arm over her shoulder and pulled her head down onto his chest. She felt his lips kiss her temple and then his finger wiped away the wetness that clung to her skin.
“I won’t let you fall, little one.”
****
Balen paced the length of Ryker’s demolished living room where Keir, Jedrik, Galen and Delara had gathered. They had been able to grab a commercial flight to Newfoundland and meet them.
He stepped over torn cushions, glass shards and destroyed antiques strewn in every direction. “She’s not a warrior,” he shouted. “Her training is zilch and she’s clueless about fighting. No skills whatsoever. She gets the amulet, gives it to us and stays here.”
“Okay, standing right here,” Danielle said, but none of them looked at her besides Delara, who gave her a men-are-such-bullies look.
Jedrik cleared his throat and stretched his neck. “You’re being pessimistic, Balen. Her telepathy far surpasses . . .” He shut his mouth when he saw Balen’s face.
Danielle grabbed Balen’s hand as he took a step towards Jedrik. She hooked his arm through her own and smiled up at him. “It’s sweet that you want to protect me, but—” her smile faded, “—you insinuate I’m a wuss again, and I’ll belt you one.”
He gave a frustrated grunt.
“Jedrik is right. Your telepathy is strong,” Keir said. “We all feel it. For Kilter to reach you from that far away was . . . well, I’m not aware of any that have that capability.”
“Ulrich did,” Jedrik said.
Danielle noticed the tension in the room rise tenfold. She was afraid to ask, but it never stopped her before so, “Who’s Ulrich?”
Jedrik answered, “Kilter’s brother. He’s dead. Kilter killed him.”
Gee, thanks for the good news. Kilter killed his own brother and she had to speak to this guy.
“Jedrik is right. Her telepathy surpasses all of us,” Keir said. “The Stream of Hell releases one power stronger than all others. She has become a rare Reflection.” He turned his direct gaze onto Balen. “Kilter is right. We need her to speak to Ryker on the inside.”
“No,” Balen shouted.
“Do I get a say in all this?” Danielle asked.
“Her telepathy is too strong not to utilize, Balen. Ryker’s life is at stake.” Keir said, “And that of our kind.”
“I’ll do it,” Danielle said.
Keir directed his gaze at Danielle. “Good,” he said. “Kilter is complicated, but he can be trusted. I spoke with him an hour ago, and whoever these guys are have Ryker contained in a room made of steel. They must somehow know about our telepathy limits and have taken precautions.”
“I don’t like this,” Balen said more to himself than anyone.
“Can you really do that? Speak to us through steel?” Jedrik asked.
Danielle shrugged. “I’ve no idea.”
Delara strolled forward and sat beside Jedrik on the couch. He ruffled her hair and she punched him in the shoulder. “If Kilter reached you in Zugarramurdi in a cave . . . well, then you can reach anyone,” Delara said.
Jedrik rubbed his hands together. “So what’s the plan? Because I’ve been itching for some action for a good few weeks.”
“If you cut your girlie hair, maybe you’d get some action,” Galen said.
Jedrik shook his loose blond curls and they danced over his ears. “Yeah well, at least I have plenty of it. It looks like you need a few seedlings planted.”
Galen flew across the room with a leap. He was close to landing on top of Jedrik and Delara when Keir raised his hands from across the room. The coffee table stood on its edge, hovering, and Galen went head-first into it. He landed in a heap on the floor.
“Galen, grow up,” Keir said. He glared at Jedrik when he heard his chuckle. He held up his hand when Jedrik went to speak. “Not a word.”
Delara bit her lip to keep from smiling and ruffled Jedrik’s curls. She whispered something in his ear, and Jedrik cursed under his breath.
Keir addressed them all, “According to our last communication with Kilter, he is a couple hours’ north of here. His text message said that they took Ryker into some sort of compound. Jedrik and Delara, you will travel to Kilter’s location with me. Danielle and Balen, retrieve the amulet and then meet us there. No one goes after Ryker until I give the okay.”
Galen cleared his throat. “And me?”
J
edrik laughed. “This job is for the big boys, numbskull.”
“Eat—”
Keir interrupted, “You will remain here.” He held up his hand, silencing his brother’s outburst. “Go through Ryker’s computer. Find everything you can on this facility. I want the building plans, who owns it, what goes on there, how long it’s been there. I want to know how many toilets this goddamn place has.”
Galen nodded.
“What’s with the amulet thing?” Jedrik asked.
“Whatever it is, it better be damn worth it,” Balen said.
“He said to keep it covered,” Danielle offered.
“Holy crap, a witch thingamajig.” Jedrik raised his brows and grinned. “Kilter, that son-of-a-bitch, he’s—”
“Dangerous. Lethal. Calculating. And he prefers to work alone,” Keir said.
“Yeah, peeing my pants to meet him,” Jedrik mumbled.
“Don’t be rude.” Delara smacked his leg.
He shrugged. “Can’t be charming all the time.”
“Try,” she said.
“Love you too,” Jedrik said.
Keir turned to Balen and gave a curt nod.
“Jedrik, pack explosives,” Balen said. “After Ryker’s out, we destroy the place. Assume the worst-case scenario.”
Balen talked about who should bring what and gave simple what-to-expect scenarios. She noticed that they all listened and held a high regard for him, asking questions and respecting his answers. It was obvious that despite the past, they still trusted him and were willing to follow his lead. She wondered if he realized this.
Delara and Jedrik were like brother and sister, playful, teasing and argumentative all at the same time. They shared a love for one another that was close and protective.
Balen finished talking and came up behind her and put his hands on her hips. Danielle was still thinking of Delara. Something was strange about her, like she was putting up a front. She was casual and straightforward and likable, yet every muscle was tense. Her eyes were . . . she couldn’t put her finger on it.
Everyone got up and began leaving the room.
“What’s her story?” she whispered to Balen.
“Delara? She’s had some . . . difficulties.”
“So she lives at Keir’s?”
“She did. After that situation with Ryszard, she left. She returned to Toronto recently, and only joins us when she is needed. She no longer lives with the Talde.”
“She looks . . . I don’t know, haunted, kind of?” Danielle whispered.
Balen shrugged. “She doesn’t talk about her past. I do know that centuries ago she and Waleron were in love. But that ended after . . . well, it just ended.” He couldn’t help himself and nuzzled her neck. He whispered into her ear, “I’ll never get over how delicious you smell, my sweet.”
“Like bananas?” Danielle asked, smiling, her thoughts of Delara dissipating.
He threw back his head and laughed. “Hmm, and I want to lick both of them.”
Kilter’s voice sent her bliss to an abrupt halt. “You have the amulet yet?”
He sounded tired, voice deeper and . . . well more pissed off. She focused her mind on the words she wanted to communicate. “No, we’re just—”
“Useless. Fuck. Do you understand that every second it takes you, Ryker is being tested on like some goddamn lab rat? I want it here yesterday. Got me?”
As offensive and vulgar as ever and keeping with his reputation. If she were shy and timid, he’d have her crying every time he opened his vile mouth.
“We’re close. Keep your pants on. I’ll contact you when I have it,” she replied.
“See that you do.”
“Why does he have to speak to me? You’re an ancient. Can’t he talk to you instead?” Danielle asked.
Balen chuckled. “Kilter being the ever-pleasant gentleman again?” He rubbed his hand up and down her back. “Your telepathy is strongest, making it easier for him. With the distance between us, it would be like a bad connection if he spoke with any of us. It also builds strength between the two of you. Even though I can’t say I’m pleased about it, the rapport will help when you begin to communicate with Ryker. Kilter and him have been together for a hundred years and are close. Well, close as Kilter will get to any. He knows Ryker better than any of us.”
“I’d like it known—I don’t like Kilter.”
“Not many do. Probably the only one left alive who does is Ryker.”
She found that easy to believe.
Galen had already gone into Ryker’s study, hacking away on the computer. Jedrik and Delara were packed and ready to go.
Keir grabbed a satchel from the lounge chair in the corner of the room and slung it over his shoulder. “I’ll contact you once we meet up with Kilter,” he said to Balen.
Danielle heard Keir in her head. “Anstice and I expect to see you for Christmas dinner, so be damn careful.”
“Ready?” Balen asked.
No, but if she didn’t do this, she’d have to deal with Kilter and that could make anyone face their fears. Besides, after drowning, entering another cave was a walk in the park.
****
The others vacated the house and headed to Kilter’s location while she led Balen along the path, over the wooden fence and to the mouth of the cave. Balen pushed the foot of snow out of the way and opened the door.
“God, I hate this,” she said. “Why do you guys always pick caves?”
“I will go in your stead, if you like,” Balen offered.
She was desperate to say yes, let him go into the dark depths of the cave, but she surprised herself and shook her head. Tor’s words kept pulsating and she wondered what he meant by that. Was this her salvation? If she did this would her fear go away?
“No, I have to face this. I feel stronger now, less vulnerable and closed in. I think it has something to do with the change. Maybe now that I’m a Senses, I won’t be as sca . . . okay, I’m still scared shitless.”
“I will assist in your panic, little one.” He held out his hand and she took it, instantly feeling the warmth cascade over her body. A man’s life was at stake, she reminded herself. Keep it together.
“I want you to concentrate and read my thoughts,” Balen said. “I will be reading yours.”
“I figured that. Remember I’m under duress. No making fun of what flies through my mind.”
Balen kissed the top of her head. God, she loved it when he did that. Ever since she had put her heart on the grill, Balen had taken it and run full speed. His hands rarely left her skin and his subtle caresses were like a fire of warmth. She loved him. She admitted it. Nothing was going to change that fact. Telling him, though, was another matter. She needed time to adjust to the feelings, the thoughts, those small words that meant so much. She hadn’t told anyone she loved them since her father.
She entered the cave and the dampness clung to her skin, cold still air hovering like a blanket, smothering her breath. Her hands started, pins and needles at the tips and working their way down. She inhaled slow and easy. Balen’s hand squeezed her own and she felt his strength and steadiness sift into her body. Go to my happy place. She always thought that therapist was shittin’ her with that stuff, but she had to admit, it helped. Blue sky, soft breeze, grass beneath her feet. Trees swaying.
“And making love in the grass.”
Danielle felt a bubble of laughter at Balen reading her silly thoughts of her happy place.
“Not silly, my love.”
“I’m changing my happy place when we get out of here.”
“To include me?”
She rolled her eyes. “No, it’s supposed to be a place where no one can find you. Where you’re safe from everything.”
“You are safe from everything in my arms. I wish to make your happy place in bed with me.”
Danielle laughed and found that her panic was much less even though they were now within the depths of the cave. Balen knelt and cleared away the dirt from around the s
quare door in the ground. He gave a yank and it revealed an old wooden ladder. Even with her eyesight—that had heightened since the change—she was still unable to see the bottom of the hole. And it was a hole, just big enough for her slender body to make it down. That was why Kilter insisted she be the one to go, neither he nor Balen were capable of fitting into that deathtrap. The amulet must have belonged to Hannah, hence the bracelet. She wondered if somehow Hannah had known what was going to happen. Was that why she gave her the key to the box? Had Hannah had some sort of premonition?
“I can do this,” she said out loud, trying to convince herself.
Balen cupped her chin and turned her to face him. “Yes, you can. I won’t let anything happen. Okay?”
She took several deep breaths and then nodded.
Balen passed her a flashlight and then helped her into the opening. She heard his calm patient words sifting through her mind as she sank further downward. She kept her eyes closed and moved methodically, one step after the other on the rickety wooden rails. Her shoulders grazed the earth on either side and her back rubbed the back of the hole. She swallowed as a sudden panic clutched at her chest. Thoughts of getting buried alive, unable to breathe, trapped.
“Breathe. Breathe, Danielle.”
The sound of his voice made her keep going. She just hoped this damn amulet was worth it and not some keepsake that Kilter wanted to put on his mantel. She’d kill the selfish bastard if it was.
Her feet hit solid ground and she saw the crawlspace to the right of the ladder. Holy crap, no. No way. She couldn’t do it. Her heart pumped like a bass drum, her palms sweating despite the coldness that seeped through her skin to lodge into her bones. She grabbed for the ladder. Escape. Get out, her mind screamed. It was like the water, drowning in earth. Dying again, except this time she’d not survive.
“My angel. My little one. Listen to my heartbeat. Hear my breath. Concentrate. Match it to your own. Feel your hands, your legs, they are free. I am here, my love. You are not alone.”
“Balen, I can’t . . . I . . .”
JUMP (The Senses) Page 24
