“First thing this morning. Something about accounting discrepancies, I dunno.”
“Did he say when he’d be back?” My mind galloped at lightning speed.
“I don’t think he knew,” he said before resuming his work on the boat deck.
“Thanks,” I mumbled and walked to my car, bag slumped over my shoulder and disappointment trailing me the entire way.
I sat in bed, flipping the pages of Pride and Prejudice mindlessly countless hours later.
That night I’d stomped away from Slade at the park, fear getting the better of me again, I’d exploded. I was a hot-head, another of the many lovely traits from my dad, and I’d walked away.
I was always leaving like that. I knew now that I was pushing Slade away. I was pushing everyone away out of fear. It’s funny how we’re so able to pick up on the flaws in others, but we see ourselves with blinders on.
My mind chewed over the sad state of my life. My past had made every decision for me from the time I was eighteen until now, ten years of running from emotional connections.
I was so sick of running.
Tears welled in my eyes as I fingered his name on my phone. Back and forth, to call or not to call. I should. It was my fault. I didn’t know much, this was all so new to me, but I knew I should be the one to call him. Slade had always been nothing but sweet, and he got me. He knew me better than I knew myself most days, but that didn’t make it any easier.
If I knew one thing though, it’s that I was so tired of running, and somehow the past ten years had felt wasted. I’d been stalled. Sitting on the edge, but always afraid to jump.
I sighed and tossed my phone on the bed and made an attempt at going back to my book.
The same paragraph. Over and over and over. Finally, I grunted and tossed the book to the end of the bed just as a pounding came from the door.
My heart leapt as I looked at the clock.
10:00pm.
I prayed it was Slade. With everything in my heart I fucking prayed. And the wishing left me scared. So scared to be hurt.
Slade travelled for work, spent days and week at a time in Portland, and as much as I may have wanted to, I couldn’t be with him there. I had a job, a life. And I didn’t want that. I didn’t want to follow him to Portland on business trips out of fear. That wasn’t the relationship I wanted.
I sucked in a deep breath and padded to the kitchen to get the door just as his big body burst through it.
“We need to talk.” His deep voice echoed through my small kitchen.
“Agreed.”
“In the bedroom.”
“What?” My face fell in confusion.
“I’m gonna talk and you’re gonna listen. But first I’m going to show you.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” I said just as he grabbed my elbow and hauled me off to my own bedroom.
“You’re more receptive after a few orgasms.”
I huffed and locked my knees, stood still in my place at the doorway, arms crossed.
“Get on your fucking knees and suck my cock.” He unzipped, his eyes pegging me to the spot I stood in.
“You’re insane.” I held my ground.
“Ah, still angry. Good. You fuck better when you’re angry.”
“Slade.”
“Look, sweetheart, I had a shitty day. Get on your knees, put my cock between your lips. That’s what’s happening right now; after that I haven’t figured out yet.”
I worked my jaw back and forth, my eyes holding his hard blue ones the entire time before I hit my knees and crawled to him. “This what you want? On my knees and crawling to you like a good, little girl?”
“Oh, fuck yeah, baby.”
“Like my lips around your dick, sucking the cum out of your balls?” I reached his feet and sat on my knees before pulling his heavy, pulsing cock from his jeans.
He groaned and his eyes fell closed. I held his searing heat in my hand, worked it up and down, and watched his body relax as he succumbed to desire.
“Put me in your mouth, baby.”
I hummed and licked up the vein on the underside of his smooth cock. I licked and flicked at the head and trailed my tongue back down again before bending and teasing his sac with my tongue. A loud groan fell from his lips before I cupped his balls and sucked him fully into my mouth.
“Open your throat and take my dick. Show me how much you can’t live without it,” he growled and fisted my hair, pulling me onto his cock. I held my breath and felt him touch the back of my throat. Eyes closed, I willed myself to breathe steady and even through my nose as he held me there, my throat constricting around the tip. His hips moved in a gentle rhythm before I finally pulled away and sucked in heavy breaths.
“That’s a girl.”
“Fuck off,” I growled and nipped at his sac with my teeth.
“Fucking tease.” He pulled my head to his cock and sank himself between my lips. One hand wrapped around my neck as he pushed deeper, harder, slower, but with force as his cock lodged at the back of my throat.
“Love feeling my dick buried between those sweet lips.” His hand massaged my neck where his dick met my esophagus. I groaned and then pulled off him again, gagging and panting for fresh air.
“Turn around.”
I caught his eyes for a moment and an intensity unlike any I’d ever felt before hit me square in the chest.
“Turn around, Dillon. Trust me.” He brushed the hair off my forehead, as his eyes turned comforting.
I swallowed the ache in my throat, my eyes holding his, really seeing him. For the first time I was seeing the trust. Feeling it. Warmth hummed through my veins as a sense of calm fell upon me. I turned and did as I was told.
I heard heavy footsteps hitting the wooden planks of my bedroom floor.
I heard a heap of fabric hit the wood as I faced away.
I finally heard the tell-tale clang of metal scraping metal.
Leather against denim.
The sound of zipper teeth unlocking centimeter by centimeter.
My senses kicked into high gear as I kneeled, eyes closed and waiting.
Slow breaths, focused and ready.
Then I felt him.
Without touching, I felt him lean close, the energy emanating off of him and into me.
“Stay calm, beautiful.”
Deep lung-filled breaths of oxygen expanded my diaphragm. Slow and steady, I focused as he wrapped the leather of his belt around my throat. I felt him slip the opposite end through the buckle before the leather slowly tightened against delicate skin.
This is what I’d thought about. What I’d worked myself to orgasm to dozens of times.
But this time it was real.
The smell of the worn leather, the bite of it as it slowly tightened against my neck.
My wind pipe.
“You’re so fucking sexy,” he murmured as he ran a palm up the knobs of my spine.
Breathing. Slow, sucked in breaths that made me feel safe, content…with Slade.
I trusted him.
I didn’t know it until that moment, until my airway was restricted and he held his own belt around my neck.
Was this fantasy or horror?
One slip and this could all go wrong.
A deep peace settled as the comfort that I trusted him washed over me.
He and I. Us. Here.
I felt alive. Real. Whole.
“Put your hand in the air if it’s too much. Okay, Dillon?” He leaned and whispered the last sentence in my ear.
“Yes,” I said clearly with strength I didn’t know I had.
My confidence soared as I realized I trusted him. A man. For the first time in my life, I had no fear. Just confidence and pleasure loosening the muscles I normally held with rigid tension.
“Good girl.” He added more pressure to the leather in his hand.
The belt tightened and I felt it begin to restrict my airway. My brain raged at me to stop, throw my hand in the air, choke a
nd scream and claw at the offending device. But I didn’t want to.
I wiggled my hips and connected with his thighs behind me.
Nerve-endings alighted and a slow burn raced across my skin at the contact.
I jerked when he landed a swift crack on my ass cheek and then eased two fingers between my ready lips. He spun and swirled and ran the length of my pussy repeatedly.
“Oh god,” I moaned.
“You like that, baby?” he groaned from behind me.
I nodded, before the bite of the leather at my neck reminded me I was tied to him.
“I love it,” I whispered and wiggled my ass again.
“You’re soaked,” he said with an almost reverence.
“I want you inside me.” I reared, hoping the bend of my back would entice him to take me.
“Mmm…my beautiful, nasty girl with my belt around her neck.” He added more pressure gently, cautiously.
I smiled and gritted my teeth together, thrust my head back and groaned like an animal in heat.
“Yeah, baby, tell me how much you love it, let me hear you.”
I panted and slumped to my elbows when he finally pushed his long, steel hard shaft deep inside me. The belt tightened in his fist as he hovered. Without moving his hips, just sitting there, allowing me to get used to him, he waited.
“So fucking sweet.” He ran one palm down my thigh causing shivers to pulse through my nerves. “Look at me, Dillon.”
I swallowed. Pushed on my elbows and twisted my neck to catch his gaze. Brilliant blue eyes caught mine and I knew he saw it. Could see what this meant for me, for us. “Make it tighter.”
“Jesus,” he growled and then tightened marginally, allowed me to adjust, then snugging it again before I sat just on the edge of too much, the entire time his gaze pinning me in my place.
The belt tightened again, one millimeter more and I feared I would tap out, throw my hand in the air and beg for release. And yet this, his dick easing in and out of me in a torturous rhythm, my airway restricted, oxygen just slightly depleted, had me turned on beyond anything I’d ever imagined. I whimpered with pleasure before slamming my ass against his pelvis.
I wanted this. Wanted more.
He followed my newly found beat and fucked me hard. Harder than he’d ever. With every deeper thrust he loosened his hold on the leather. Eased it off slowly as my pussy began to throb, my clit aching, juices soaking my thighs.
I didn’t know if he was easing off the pressure at my neck because he knew the forceful thrusts would constrict me uncomfortably, or if he was just too distracted to care about the leather around my neck and wrapped around his fist.
He was owning me completely.
I didn’t know it was possible.
“Jesus, I love watching my dick fucking you with my belt around your neck. So fucking hot.” He thrust and slammed. My nipples swept across the shiny wood of the floor, cooled and chilled, pebbling and aching.
I reached a hand up and twisted at a nipple, tightened it to a small bud before my palm trailed between my legs and worked at my clit. I rubbed it back and forth with a fierce determination.
So close. So hot. So primal. It was all too much.
“That’s it, baby, rub your clit. Cum all over my cock while I fuck you on the floor,” he muttered.
My wrist turned in tighter circles, more pressure applied to the hypersensitive bundle between my thighs before my body began to shake.
My breaths grew shallow and fierce, my legs tensed, the muscles bunched and aching, my entire body strung and ready to detonate. I whimpered incoherently before the belt fell loose around my neck and I felt both of Slade’s hands grip fiercely into my ass cheeks.
He mumbled dirty words, disjointed grunts fell on near-deaf ears as I worked my clit to an earth shattering orgasm. My toes curled, my fingernails grappled against cold wood, my head dropped and hair fell across my face, sweeping the floor.
Slade’s fingers crushed bruises into my skin before he rutted more quickly and then slowed, driving full and deep as he shot long spurts of his cum deep inside my body. His heavy breaths fell across my back and washed across every dip and bend, cool air mixing with his warm breath, another sensation added to the mixture already running through me.
“Jesus, baby.” He came to a standstill before pulling out of me. His heavy body dropped to the floor and pulled me into his arms. Fists in my hair, arms wrapped around my small form, he held me. We panted together, shared oxygen and trust as if it was the first breath of each we’d been graced with.
“That was incredible,” he mused as he held me tightly to his chest, limbs wrapped up in limbs, our naked bodies heaving together as we recovered.
“Yeah…” I finally breathed in agreement. “We should do that again.”
“I’m gonna need a few minutes.”
I broke into a fit of laughter until my oxygen was restricted once again, not from his belt around my neck bringing me to my knees, but from the mutual release.
But something was nagging at me. Something I’d been thinking on the last few days. “You know how you were saying sexuality is a scale? That different things turn us on for random reasons?” I stroked the light dusting of blonde on his chest as I spoke.
“Yeah.” He pulled me a little closer, perhaps sensing the seriousness of what I was about to tell him.
“You mentioned that I like being called a slut and there’s no reason for it…”
“Mm-hmm,” he hummed.
“I think there is a reason.”
“What’s that?”
“When I was young, I sort of…got that reputation. Whether I was worthy of it or not,” I huffed. “And I had all of these connotations in my mind. Memories of my dad and the hookers…”
His fingertips danced across the skin of my chest as I spoke.
“When people started saying that about me, it was awful. The worst thing they could have called me, just because I like sex.” I choked on a sob that was fighting for release. “But if I owned that term, lived up to it in some messed up way, I had control of it. I can hardly even say the words, it doesn’t make sense.”
“It does,” he reassured. “Look at me, Dillon.” His fingers tipped my chin to meet his eyes. “You don’t have to hide from me.” Long moments passed between us. Our gazes locked, breaths the only thing filling the air between us.
“I know.” I finally nodded as I mustered the courage to say what had been weighing on me. “When you call me a slut when you’re inside me…I love it. And I can’t explain it, it’s like being free of it. I would never, ever want to be called that word, but when you do it when we’re …playing, it’s liberating.”
“Good girl.” He ran a comforting hand across my back.
“Is that weird?”
“Not at all. Another trigger, I guess.” He shrugged his broad shoulders and pressed me tighter to his side.
“I guess…” I trailed off in thought.
“You okay?” He pushed his nose into my hair and inhaled.
“Yeah,” I said on a sigh and pressed my cheek to his chest.
“Proud of you,” he said.
I sucked in a long breath and felt a weight ease from my chest. My eyes fell closed as I focused on his heartbeat pumping beneath my ear.
Slow and steady.
Tears pricked my eyes when it occurred to me that that’s what he’d always been. If there were a race for my heart, Slade would win because he’d been nothing if not persistent and determined.
A deadly combination.
I sat stroking her bare knee under the table at Pier 49. We looked out over a dusky bay where steely blue bled to peach before finally settling on a vibrant shade of coral at the horizon.
“I have a confession.”
Those four simple words had my heart shuddering to a stop. “Oh¸ yeah?” I tried to act casual as my gaze met hers.
She smiled as she traced circles along my knuckles. “I’ve never done relationships, I didn’t think
I could be good at them what with the poor example I had growing up, but I realize now, I just never wanted to before.” She looked up, her eyes landing on me.
“Before?”
“Yeah. Before.” A slow grin lifted her cheeks.
“Are you trying to tell me something?” My hand stilled on her thigh. I was going to make her work for this one after all the hoops she’d had me jumping through.
She huffed and rolled her pretty eyes. “Slade,” she leaned over the table giving me a delicious view of her cleavage, “Will you be my boyfriend?” she murmured and nipped at my ear lobe.
A deep laugh emptied from my diaphragm. “Does that mean I get to fuck you every night of the week and in the mornings on weekends?”
“You already do.” She shook her head, her brilliant smile lighting up our small corner.
“Then I guess that’s a ‘yes’ then.” I locked our fingers and placed a chaste kiss on her wrist.
“Where to now, Casanova?” she purred and looked up at me with dreamy eyes.
“Come on, let me revel in the victory for a while.”
“Never.” Her eyes glinted with unabashed happiness.
I ran my hand up her thigh before answering her earlier question. “I was thinking we could stay in tonight.” I nudged at her under the table.
She giggled just as my phone buzzed in my pocket.
I frowned but refused to answer it. I didn’t give a shit what it was, Dillon and I were so fucking good. We were in Portland for the weekend. I’d been right, Wild was more than happy to take her Saturday night shift off her hands now that the kids were around.
Bastard could not wait to escape.
“Maybe you should get that.” She glanced towards my pants with a smile.
“Nope. I’m all yours.” I threw her a cocky grin just as the server returned with my card and receipt. I scrawled illegibly on the line and then stood and pulled out her chair. “A night in, some wine, a movie, maybe a few toys.” I smoothed a hand over the contour of her bottom. That tight dress was driving me to fucking distraction.
She did it on purpose, I had no doubt.
I was discreetly adjusting the erection tenting my pants so I could make it to the door without alerting the other diners that I was itching to be deep inside her when my phone buzzed again.
Slade Page 13
