The only time he felt a modicum of peace were moments like these. Pursuit of perfection filled the rest of his days, and he was often enraged with himself and others for falling short.
Captain Payson’s letter ended with a recommendation for promotion. James knew the report was making its way up the chain of command, so it was just a matter of time until the captain called to make it official. Good things were happening all around, and only two days remained until Leo’s state swim meet.
With a start James realized it had been more than two months since he’d visited Denny Rose. How could he have let so much time pass? Failing to visit Denny meant failing as a leader. The glowing words he’d just read about himself suddenly disgusted him.
James jettisoned the letter and glanced at his watch. Visiting hours would end soon, so he rose quickly, snatching his cover from his desk. His long legs carried him across the base with purpose, and he returned a series of subordinates’ salutes. James entered the prison and signed the visitor log, waiting only a few moments before a petty officer led him to the visiting booths.
MPs led a handcuffed Denny Rose to the other side of the glass, and James immediately noticed something different about his former second-in-command. Denny didn’t bother to salute before sitting down in a huff.
James eyed him curiously, and both picked up the phones.
When Denny remained silent, James began the conversation.
“You must be upset I haven’t visited in a while. You know how things get in V-Four, Denny.”
“That’s not why I’m upset.”
James realized he’d also dropped the sir. “Why are you upset, then?”
Denny paused. “It’s not important. I — just don’t visit me any more. It’s not right.”
“How can you say that?” James paled. “We’re still friends, right?”
“No. Not anymore.”
“What happened? What changed?” James stared at Denny’s bald spot as he looked down, avoiding James’s eyes. Then the likely reason for Denny’s cold shoulder dawned on him, and his whole demeanor changed. “I see your daughter’s been telling some tall tales.” Denny’s head snapped up, eyes round.
“So I got a little physical with Leo.” James shrugged. “What was I supposed to do? He was abusing prescription medication, and I was terrified for his health. The punishment was effective — he’s been clean since then.”
“That’s not punishment! That’s abuse.” James lowered his voice. “It is none of your business how I discipline my sons.”
“So Jason got the same treatment?”
James didn’t answer.
“It is my business when my daughter’s involved. You stay away from her, James. And if I hear that anything else happens to Leo, I’ll report this to Captain Payson.”
“Don’t mess with me, Denny, or you’ll regret it. I can easily forbid Leo from seeing Audrey. I can make things much worse for you in here.”
“Audrey and Leo are in love. You couldn’t stand between them if you tried. I know they’re young, but they’re in love. As their fathers, we have to accept it and deal with it.”
“I don’t have to accept anything.” James gripped the phone. “I make my own destiny.”
Denny grimaced. “To think I used to admire you. What happened to your pride in your sons? Your great sense of humor?” James felt his chest tighten.
“Get out of here,” Denny hissed. “I never want to see you again.” Panic bloomed in James’s heart, and his façade slipped.
“Don’t — don’t say that, Denny. This’ll blow over and everything will be fine again.”
Denny gaped at him. “I have enough criminal friends right now.” He gestured to the prison walls. “I don’t need a child abuser in the mix. I don’t care if you are the only officer who visits me in here — our friendship’s over.”
He returned the phone to its cradle and stood up. A guard approached instantly to lead him away.
James sat motionless after he left. How could Denny do that?
He’d just lost his only friend. Blinking quickly, he shook it off. His loss.
27. Taper
Leo felt his muscles twitch as he visualized the last length of the one-hundred freestyle race.
Prone bodies littered the pool deck as Matt led the team through a visualization exercise in the warm March sunshine. Their last practice before departing for Ft. Lauderdale had included very little time in the water. Physically they’d trained all they could for the state meet, but mentally they still had work to be done. This was the time when mental toughness separated winners from losers.
Leo visualized sprinting to the wall. He imagined his lungs feeling ready to burst and his legs burning as adrenaline coursed through him.
Lunging for the finish, Leo jammed into the touch pad at the end of his lane. As instructed, he shot up his hand when he felt himself finish.
His eyelids fluttered open, and he squinted in the brightness. A few teammates were still visualizing their races. He rubbed his eyes and stretched, his body all angles and elbows as he raised his arms to lengthen his triceps and laterals muscles.
Once most of the sleepy swimmers showed signs of life, Matt called, “Okay, let’s get in. Two-hundred choice warm-up.” The coach winked as he passed. “Forty-four, Leo. Nice.” Leo grinned. Matt had clicked the stopwatch when Leo raised his hand. He’d just visualized swimming his goal time for the one-hundred free. He’d be stoked if he broke the forty-five-second barrier two days from now.
To his left, Leo noticed Audrey’s eyes still closed. She must really be getting into this visualization thing. Leo leaned down and nudged her side.
Audrey woke with a start and looked momentarily confused.
He chuckled. “Did you fall asleep?”
“Yeah, I guess so.” She yawned. “The last thing I remember was Matt telling me to feel warmth flow like liquid down my spine. Then I was out.”
“Well, we’re supposed to get in the water now, so you better wake up quick. Aren’t you sleeping well?”
Audrey pursed her lips. “I’ve been really tired the past two weeks.
You know how when you taper, sometimes you feel worse before you feel better? I think that’s what’s going on — my body finally catching up on rest or something.”
Leo frowned. The team had been tapering for weeks. By now Audrey should’ve been feeling a burst of energy. Leo had been throwing open doors with vigor all week long. He helped Audrey to her feet and headed for his lane.
He chewed his goggle strap and laughed at Eric’s scruffy face as he prepared to enter the water. They’d all soon be shaving their bodies to slice through the water with less resistance, and until then, Eric was sporting a thick Fu Manchu mustache.
The crisp water refreshed Leo as he jumped in to begin his eight lengths of warm-up. He felt high and light in the water — each stroke effortless yet powerful. Matt didn’t have to yell because everyone knew this would be a brief, easy practice. And the pool was much less crowded as only about twenty swimmers had qualified for the state meet: an elite group who hoped to represent Pensacola High School proudly.
As he surfaced, Leo found Audrey hanging on the wal . She didn’t look refreshed or powerful.
Matt put them through a series of stroke drills, then a pull set.
Some completed the brief workout by swimming four easy lengths to cool down while the relay swimmers rehearsed their exchanges.
Leo joined Alex, Eric, and Jake behind the blocks to practice takeoffs for the four-hundred freestyle relay. As the fastest sprinter, Leo would swim the anchor leg. After the first three had practiced, Leo mounted the block, his myopic focus on Jake’s approach. His hands dangled in front, almost guiding his teammate to him, then Leo swung his arms around and launched off the blocks in a tight pike. He entered the water with nary a splash.
“Team meeting in three minutes!” Matt announced.
“Matt?” Eric leaned on the block. “This practice’s too short. I
need more yardage.”
Matt shook his head. “No you don’t. I don’t want you overworked like last year. We’ll do some pace hundreds tomorrow when we get down to Ft. Lauderdale.”
Eric scowled.
“Okay, here’s your itinerary for the weekend.” Matt distributed flyers to the gathered team. “Our flight leaves at ten thirty tomorrow morning. Make sure you’re at the school by eight sharp so you can catch the bus to the airport. Once we arrive down south we’ll grab a bite to eat, check in, and head over to the Hall of Fame Pool for practice. Room assignments are listed here.” Leo glanced down at the paper, relieved to discover he was room-ing with Alex. Although Leo and Eric had been getting along better since January, his intensity sometimes distracted Leo and made him too nervous. Alex’s goofy humor would keep Leo upbeat and loose.
Leo knew his parents were also staying in the hotel. They’d made reservations long ago.
“Hey, roomie,” Elaine giggled, grinning at Audrey, who had tucked herself under Leo’s arm.
“Hola, chica,” Audrey replied. “Get ready for some supersonic swimming.”
Matt finished his instructions. “Drink plenty of water today and tomorrow, and scale back on portion sizes — we’re doing less work, so you need fewer calories. Also, get some good sleep in the next two days. I want you resting as much as possible.” The team huddled. On the count of three came a collective shout: “Panthers!”
Leo grabbed his equipment and started toward the locker room with a happy glow, but he changed course when he saw Jason on the other side of the fence. He’d made it a habit to stop by practice when he could.
“Jase! Looks like both of us need showers again.” Jason smiled. “Yeah, it was a hot one in the warehouse today.
Sure didn’t miss this swampy weather when I lived in Washington, I tell ya. Gotta go soon and shower before I pick up Cameron.” Leo’s eyebrows arched. “Wow, you guys are spending a lot of time together. It must be getting hot and heavy.”
“Not as heavy as you and Audrey. Looked like you might go for it right there on the pool deck.”
Leo felt his cheeks grow warm. “Well, she’s sitting next to me in a swimsuit. This sport’s like torture.”
“Plus you’re all energized from taper and everything.” Jason winked.
“How is Cameron anyway?” Leo asked.
“Well, she’s finally agreed to date me again, and I think she’s pretty good. As good as you can be with a murdered dad.” Leo glanced behind him as Audrey disappeared into the locker room. “Must be tough with the murderer in prison just down the road.”
Jason studied him for a moment. “Except Cam doesn’t think Mr. Rose murdered her dad.”
“Really?” Leo said, surprised. “Why not?” Jason drew his hand down his mouth. “I shouldn’t go into it.
It’s…it’s not my story to tell. Anyway, I came by to wish you good luck on your meet. I know you’ll do awesome.” Leo smiled, warmed by his brother’s support. “I wish you could go.”
“Yeah, well, I don’t have money for a plane ticket, and there’s no way I’m driving with Cold Spice and Mom.” Jason met his eyes.
“I’ve got an AA meeting tonight at ten. Why don’t you sneak out and go with me?”
Leo immediately looked down. “I can’t go…Matt just told us we need to rest, so I can’t be out late.”
“That’s a new one.” Jason shook his head. “At least you didn’t use the old ‘I have too much homework’ or ‘CS will kill me if he finds out’ excuse again.”
“C’mon, Jase. I don’t want to think about this stuff now. I’m focusing only on swimming the next few days.” Jason shook his head. “You gotta stay vigilant. It can sneak up on you whenever you let your guard down.”
“I’ve already got CS on my case every day about this. I don’t need to hear it from you too.”
“Okay, okay.” Jason offered his palms in apology. “I’m sorry. I just worry about you. I want you out of that house, away from him.”
“That makes two of us.” Leo glanced at the digital readout on his brother’s watch. “I better get home, and you shouldn’t keep Cam waiting too long.” He smirked. “Make sure you practice safe sex.”
“TMI, bro.” Then Jason seemed to think for a moment. “But where were you four years ago? You be safe too.” Leo watched Jason leave, wondering what the heck that comment meant.
28. Good Night and Good Luck
Her father leaned in closer, his eagerness apparent even through the prison phone’s tinny distortion of his voice. “What was Marcie’s time at districts?”
Audrey smiled. “Marcie went two-oh-five and I went two-oh-six in the two-hundred IM at districts. But she swims faster in season. I’m a better taper swimmer, so I should be able to beat her.”
“Good. Remember to get after the backstroke, Audrey. No Sunday strolls.”
She rolled her eyes. “I will, Dad.”
He nodded solemnly, his eyes shining.
Sensing her father’s impending melancholy, Audrey switched the topic. “¿Caminas mucho?”
It took a second for him to adjust to her shift to Spanish. “Uh, sí. I walk a lot.”
“Eso es bueno. Es bueno para la salud del bebé.” Her father gave her a quizzical look. “I didn’t catch that.”
“Oh, I was making a stupid joke about walking being good for the baby — remember? You need to work harder on your Spanish, Dad! That was pretty easy vocabulary.”
“Yes, ma’am.” He seemed to force a smile.
“Aren’t you studying Spanish anymore?”
He averted his eyes. “They…they took the books away.”
“Why?”
He sighed and seemed to struggle for words. “It’s okay, Audrey girl. Please don’t worry about it. How’s your mother doing?” Audrey pulled her cell phone from her purse. “I checked with the MP, and he said I could call Mom while I was here, so maybe we can all talk together this way.”
“That’s so thoughtful. Thank you.”
“No big deal, Dad.” She sat with a phone in each hand and grinned when her mother answered. “Hey, Mom. I’m here with Dad.
We thought we’d call and say hi.”
“Wonderful!” her mother said. “How’s he doing? Oh, hey — make sure you get a good breakfast on Friday.” Audrey rolled her eyes a second time. “Mom, Dad just went over race strategy, and now you’re giving me nutrition tips. I have a coach, you know.”
“But you still need your parents,” her mother insisted. “Listen, I feel awful about this, honey, but they’re not giving me time off for your meet. I won’t be able to make it.” Audrey swallowed. “That’s okay, Mom. I know you’d be there if you could.”
“Sorry,” her father mouthed, catching her eye.
Her blinks came rapid-fire as she tried not to look at him. “So, um, Mom, how do you like the new hospital?” Getting herself back under control, Audrey acted as a relay between her parents until her mother had to say goodbye.
“I’ll be thinking about you every minute this weekend, Audrey girl,” her dad said. “Just do your best and have fun, okay?”
“Okay, Dad. I’ll be thinking about you too.” Her father craned his neck toward the MP on his left. “Permission to stand, sir?” The MP nodded, and her father turned back to her.
“Honey, I can’t be at your meet, but I wanted to tell you good luck to you in my own way. They’ll probably haul me out of here when I try this, so I’ll tell you goodbye now too. I love you, Audrey girl.” She tilted her head, watching him rise.
He cleared his throat and burst into Audrey’s favorite cheer. He punched his arms in the air, then straight ahead, then scooped down and gyrated his hips as he chanted:
Say can you dig it!
Our team’s got soul, soul
Our team’s got might, might
Our team’s gonna win, win,
This meet tonight!
Giggles spilled out of her as she watched. Had he been rehearsing in his cell? B
efore he got through the first verse, the MP approached with a disgusted look and yanked him toward the exit.
“Audrey!” her father yelled, laughing despite being manhandled.
She could barely hear him through the glass.
“I love you, Audrey girl. Good luck!” She watched him being carted away, a goofy grin on her face.
Leo swung open the front door and jumped when he almost stepped right into his father. “Dad!” Chilly Sourpuss’s face hardened. “You’re five minutes late.” Leo bit his lip as he closed the door “I’m sorry, sir. Matt had a team meeting after practice to give us our itinerary for the state meet.”
“Let me see it.”
Leo handed him the paper and waited.
“Your mother and I arrive at nineteen-hundred tomorrow,” he said after a moment.
“Yes, sir.” Leo’s chest loosened. He’d have almost an entire day free of CS.
“How was your practice tonight?”
“Fine, sir. I think our four-hundred free relay’s going to be good this year.”
“That Jake kid’s inexperienced. He’d better not screw it up for all of you.” His father stood up a bit taller. “I’m headed to the office to get some work done before I miss two days for your meet. I’ll drug test you before I go.”
“Yes, sir.” Leo reached for the specimen cup that had appeared in his father’s hand.
His father hovered outside the bathroom door as Leo provided the sample.
“Here you go, sir.”
CS took the cup, and Leo braced for the usual list of questions.
“Any chance there’ll be opiates in here?”
“No, sir.”
“Because if you’re going to pop positive, you’ll be in a lot less trouble if you tell me now.”
“Understood, sir. I haven’t taken any pills.” His father gave a satisfied nod. “I’ll probably see you tomorrow night before the meet, but I wanted to wish you good luck, Leo.”
“Thank you, Dad.” Leo searched his father’s multihued eyes for any hint of feeling. He could draw no firm conclusion before CS turned to go.
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