“Why’d you break into the psychologist’s office?” Las Vegas asked again.
“I can’t tell you, ma’am!” Frustration crept into his raspy voice.
“Arms out,” she ordered.
Leo lifted his arms to the side, parallel to the floor. It was easy at first, just like the twenty-four-hour march, but after a few minutes his shoulders burned and his mind screamed.
If he’d only come clean with Nevington or Dr. Ina, they’d probably fight to save him. But he couldn’t think about self preservation, only about saving others. Audrey was one of several people on the line now, and her happiness was much more important than his.
His deltoids were on fire, and he willed his leaden arms to remain airborne. Nevington’s face was mired in disappointment. The varia-tions of PT torture were endless, and Leo knew she would not give up anytime soon. Stay strong for Audrey, he told himself, choking down a sob. Save Audrey.
According to the sunlight filtering into the room, it was almost noon by the time he saw Dr. Ina. She came to his dorm room as he was enduring the wall-sit exercise, his knees at a ninety-degree angle and his back against the wall, forming a human chair. Flames of pain blazed through his quadriceps, and sweat soaked his uniform.
Nevington hovered over him, her now-hoarse voice not quite as intimidating as it had been at the beginning.
“On your feet!” she ordered, and both midshipmen stood at attention, saluting Ina.
Though he guessed Dr. Ina would likely ask him even more questions, he was happy to see her. Her interrogation couldn’t be any worse than what he’d just withstood.
“At ease,” Ina commanded. “Midshipman Nevington, I’d like to speak to you outside. MP, give some water to Midshipman Scott.” After gulping to his heart’s content, Leo set down the water bottle and shifted back to attention when Ina returned.
“I let Viva head to Noon Meal Formation,” she said. “Please bring some food for Midshipman Scott, then stand guard outside,” she told the MP.
The MP nodded and left.
Ina pulled out Leo’s desk chair and ordered “Have a seat,” before crossing the room to sit at Benito’s desk.
“You’re not on crutches anymore, ma’am,” Leo observed as he sat down.
Ina nodded. “Today’s the first day my surgeon said I could go without them.”
“How is your knee, ma’am?”
“My knee’s healing well, Leo. How are you doing?”
“Fine, ma’am.”
“Your company commander was tough on you?”
“No more than I expected, ma’am.”
She leaned back in her chair. “So, I talked to the Maryland Psychology Licensing Board today. They’re not pleased with your actions. They agreed I need to find out whose charts you read so I can inform my clients of the confidentiality breach. And you will tell me that information this afternoon.” A defiant glare was his only reply.
“I have clients out there living their lives, oblivious to the fact that some eighteen-year-old boy stole their private information. You’re a psychotherapy client, Leo. How would you like that? How’d you like some stranger knowing your deepest secrets?” Looking away, Leo realized the afternoon session would be a different kind of challenge. Emotional torture. Dr. Ina’s guilt trip had arrived at its destination, landing squarely with a resonant thump.
Her voice rose. “Would you feel violated if some stranger stole your secrets without your permission? Would you be angry? Would you hesitate to trust again?”
He looked down. “Yes, ma’am.”
“I would too, Leo. I’d be very disturbed. I’d feel even more violated if the person who stole my privacy refused to share why he did so.” She waited a beat. “Of course, if you were just looking at your own chart, well, that’d be different.”
Leo gulped. He felt awful. “I wasn’t looking for my chart.”
“Thank you for telling me that.” Ina rewarded him with a warm smile. “I was just talking to Ms. Nevington. She told me the bruise you had a couple of weeks ago was from Lt. Keaton, not a wayward rifle.”
He felt his cheeks burn. “I’m sorry, ma’am, but as I told you, my company commander ordered me to lie about that.”
“Apology accepted. It’s quite inappropriate for a superior to strike a subordinate. I wonder what happened to the lieutenant. Do you think she was reprimanded?”
Leo stared at his psychologist. He realized the game she was playing, trying to squeeze information from him. He took a deep breath to calm himself, then realized the irony of using the very skills she’d taught him to work against her. “I don’t know, ma’am. What typically happens to an officer in that situation?”
“I would think the commandant would order her to attend anger-management counseling — just like your punishment for acting out in violence.”
“I wouldn’t know, ma’am,” Leo said, mustering his best sweet smile.
With a knock, the MP returned carrying a sandwich and a soda.
Leo devoured his food.
When he wiped his mouth at the end, Ina asked, “Have they allowed you to make any phone calls?”
“No, ma’am.”
“Okay, then, it’s time to call your parents and tell them what’s happened.”
Leo jumped. “After the awful stuff I told you about my dad, you’d force me to call him?” Two could play the guilt-trip game.
Ina cocked her head to one side. “You told me he was in the Gulf. I want you to call your mother.”
“She, um, ma’am, she doesn’t need to know about this, ma’am.”
“Yes, she does, Leo. You might get separated. A mother deserves to know that about her son.”
“I’m gonna wait until the hearing’s over before I tell her anything.”
“Leo Scott, you wil cal your mother right now,” Dr. Ina ordered, sounding very much like his mother.
Leo sighed. “Yes, ma’am. I don’t have a phone, though.”
“I’m sure you can figure out where to get one, Leo.” He frowned. “Mr. Jones let me use his before. His quarters are down the p-way.”
“Fine. Go call your mother.”
He headed down the passageway to the plebe’s room with the MP on his six.
Realizing it was just the MP following him — Dr. Ina wasn’t going to monitor his cal — Leo decided to get another painful conversation over with and opted to call Audrey instead.
He heard Audrey squeal when she answered. “How in the world are you calling me in the middle of the day?”
“Just got the chance to call, I guess. Wasn’t sure if you’d be free?”
“I’m in between classes, sitting outside in the sun.” Worry crept into her voice. “Um, Leo? Are you okay? You sound weird.” She knew him so well. He sighed. “I’m in a lot of trouble.”
“Oh, no. What happened?”
“I can’t talk about it, Audrey. I called because I have to tell you something.”
Leo squeezed his eyes shut, his stomach swirling with dread. He hated what he had to do. If this worked, she’d want nothing to do with him ever again. If his plan didn’t work, he’d want nothing to do with her — for her own sake. He’d never allow her to be tethered to a man in prison. He couldn’t watch it happen again.
His reasons for what he was about to say were logical and sound.
So why did his heart ache?
“What is it?” she prompted. “You know you can tell me anything, right?”
Swallowing tears, he choked, “I’m calling to break up with you. I-I, um, I don’t love you anymore.”
There was stunned silence on the other end of the phone, followed by a strangled cry. “Why, Leo? Why? How can you do this? You told me you loved me!”
He exhaled miserably and gripped the phone. You can do this.
You have to save her. His jaw hardened with resolve. “I did love you, but not anymore. I can’t do this long-distance thing. I don’t want you to call or speak to me ever again.” Quickly he hung up, fighting the
urge to vomit. He felt chills of self hatred bloom up his spine, his ragged breathing smothered by his hands cradling his face. He could only imagine the despair and confusion Audrey felt right now. He did that to her. But it was the only way.
Leo trudged back to his room with the MP. Slinking back into his chair, he faced Dr. Ina once again.
“How’d she take it?” Ina asked.
“Not well, ma’am. She…she cried.”
“Did you tell your mother you weren’t cooperating with us in the investigation?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“And did she encourage you to be more forthcoming?” Leo shrugged. “She doesn’t really care what I do.” Ina looked confused. “Really? Your mother doesn’t care? I find that hard to believe.” She stroked her chin. “What’s her phone number? I’m going to call her.”
“No, ma’am, you can’t. I — ”
“I want to call your mother.”
“No!” he yelled.
“What do you have against me speaking to your mother? What are you hiding from me? Damn it, Leo! I’m trying to fight for you, and all you give me is one lie after another!” He slumped in his chair. “I didn’t call my mom,” he finally said.
“I called my girlfriend, ma’am.”
“What’d you say to her?” She looked even more perplexed.
“I broke up with her,” he confessed at a whisper.
“But you love her!” Ina protested. “You told me you wanted to marry her someday!”
“Where I’m going, she can’t follow.”
There was a loud knock, and Mr. Sour appeared. Leo leaped to his feet.
Sour glanced at Ina, who remained in her chair, her forehead wrinkled. “The Honor Committee’s assembled, ma’am. Mr. Scott, you’re to come with me.”
All too eager to go, Leo snatched his cover off his desk and marched. He was one step closer to giving Audrey her father back.
68. Frayed Edges
Despite the warm sun on her back, Audrey shivered. Her tears had dried, leaving desperate tracks down her face, and she felt suspended in time, foggy and brutalized. The darkness enveloping her mind stood in sharp contrast to her bright surroundings on the campus quad.
She looked down at her phone. The screen flashed Call Time 1 : 26. One minute, twenty-six seconds was all the time it had taken to ruin her life. Eighty-six seconds and her raison d’être had ceased to exist. Leo had wrenched himself away without a moment’s notice, without a hint of warning.
She’d been listening to a sad song by The Fray before Leo called, and the lyrics now played in an endless loop in her mind — a pathetic soundtrack to her devastation. What on earth had just happened?
Was he taking Oxycontin again? He hadn’t sounded high on the phone, though it had taken quite a while for her to catch on before.
Could he get pills at the Academy?
Was there another girl? Audrey felt sick. No, he wouldn’t do that to her. Would he? Maybe he’d found a girl who shared his enthusiasm for the Navy. Maybe he wanted a girlfriend whose father wasn’t in prison for murder.
Why? Why? Leo had sounded upset on the phone — almost like he was crying too. Had he truly wanted to break up? Had CS forced him into it?
With each thought, Audrey became increasingly panicked, increasingly riled. Her initial shock began to shift into hot rage.
How dare Leo do this to her? She was devoted to him, and he’d just slapped her in the face. How dare he shred their love without one shred of explanation?
She sat up tall. She’d show him. Oh, what he’d be missing.
Her defiance crumbled in a second. “I don’t want to show him,” she cried to no one in particular. “I don’t want to prove how much he’ll miss me. I miss him! I just want him back. Leo, Leo…” Glancing at her phone again, Audrey began punching numbers.
After two calls failed to connect, Audrey praised God when Cameron answered.
“Audrey! How are you?”
Close to hyperventilating, Audrey couldn’t even speak.
“What is it?” Cameron asked. “Are you okay?” Audrey sniffled. “I’m s-s-sorry to bother you, C-C-Cam. It’s just…Elaine and my mom didn’t answer, and I d-d-didn’t know who else to call.”
“It’s fine. I’m only grading homework. What’s going on?”
“L-L-Leo broke up with me,” Audrey wailed, her tears starting again.
“No! He couldn’t have.”
“He did. He just called me. He said…he said he didn’t love me anymore!”
“Oh, Audrey. Sweetheart, I’m so sorry. I don’t understand. Did he tell you why?”
“No, that’s the worst part. He hung up right away.” Audrey sobbed.
“Eighty-six. Eighty-six.”
“Audrey, honey, I can’t understand you. What are you saying?” Cam asked, sounding frustrated.
Audrey took a deep breath. “Cam. Has Leo said anything to Jason? Is he seeing somebody else? Is anything wrong at the Academy?”
“Not that I heard. You know Leo hardly ever gets the chance to call. I’ll call Jase and ask, okay? Just hold on tight. Leo loves you, and he’ll come to his senses. I know it.”
Audrey sniffed. God, she needed a drink. “Thanks, Cam. Call me as soon as you find anything out, okay?”
“Okay. Hang in there.”
Audrey took a ragged breath and searched her backpack for some tissues. Maybe Leo’s brother could make some sense out of this. She surely could not. She would never recover, not even in eighty-six years.
“It’s simple, Midshipman Scott,” Mr. Sour said.
Five upper-class midshipmen sat in a row of chairs behind the table: the Honor Committee.
“Unless you tell us of any mitigating circumstances related to the break-in at Counseling Services, we’ll be forced to separate you from the Navy.”
Leo stood at attention, barely holding on after the grueling interrogations and horrific phone call to Audrey. His precious Navy career was toast, but he was just numb. He refocused on the task ahead — the task that couldn’t be completed from inside Academy walls.
Whiskey scrubbed his hand over his face. “Midshipman Scott, what’s the Honor Concept?”
“Sir, midshipmen are persons of integrity; they stand for that which is right, sir.”
“And how were you standing for that which is right, Mr. Scott?” he immediately countered. “How were you demonstrating integrity by stealing confidential information?” Resignation slumped Leo’s shoulders. He always failed. He’d tried to do right by Audrey, only to make her lose their baby then pretend not to love her anymore. He’d promised to never let her go, but he hadn’t kept his word. His life had been full of attempts to make his father proud, yet he was once again screwing up.
Admittedly, his integrity was questionable. He had no business becoming a naval officer. “No excuse, sir.”
“Do you believe you have honor, Mr. Scott?” Sour challenged.
Leo knew he was forever tainted. “No, sir.”
The five midshipmen conferred for a few minutes while Leo maintained his stance of attention. He felt adrift, lost at sea.
The sound of Sour’s voice broke through his trance. “Midshipman Scott, you’re hereby separated from the Navy.” He pointed to some documents. “Approach the table and sign these papers.” Leo signed several times, feeling increasingly repulsed each time he scribbled his poisoned last name. He was ruined.
“Midshipman Sour, take this PFC to his quarters to collect his belongings, then escort him off the Yard,” said one of the commit-tee members.
Sour nodded. “Let’s go.”
Leo marched to his room with Whiskey. He could barely feel his legs as they made their way through the labyrinth of Mother B.
Benito was absent, probably at swim practice. Sour looked on as Leo kneeled to pull a duffel bag from under his rack.
“Why’d the firstie call me a PFC, sir?” Leo asked as he stuffed in shoes and clothes.
Whiskey’s voice was cold. “
Private Effing Civilian.” Leo nodded with a half-smile. All the stupid acronyms and jokes of the Navy were now a thing of the past.
“Why are you doing this, Leo?” Sour asked.
He paused his packing, unable to look his squad leader in the eye. “I’m sorry for letting you down, sir. I didn’t mean to. I, uh, I just don’t belong here, I guess.”
Leo stood and pulled Audrey’s framed picture from his desk drawer, then gingerly set it inside his bag. He tossed in his father’s diploma as well. His skin tingled. “Sir, may this PFC have privacy while he changes into civilian clothes?”
“Of course.” Sour backed out of the room.
Leo stole a glance at Benito’s rack, hesitating. Then he took a deep breath and reached under. His hand trembled as it grasped cold metal. Closing his eyes, Leo whispered, “I’m sorry, hombre,” before placing the gleaming weapon and bullet cartridge in his bag.
Leo ripped off his uniform, still damp with sweat, and quickly changed into jeans and a T-shirt. The civilian clothing felt bizarrely loose. He looked around the room and felt sick as he surveyed the vestiges of his once-promising naval career.
He opened the door to find Whiskey waiting for him in the passageway. “Will you say goodbye to Midshipman Dulce for me, sir?”
“Will do. Where to, Leo?”
He’d considered calling Jason, but he couldn’t risk his brother knowing his plan. According to Dr. Ina, he wasn’t a good liar. “Sir, would you drive me to the airport?”
“Absolutely.”
They marched down the passageway, side by side, while Leo memorized the sights and smells of the dorm he’d never see again.
He steeled himself for the confrontation looming ahead. This time he would stand for that which is right.
69. Storm Warning
Leo held his breath as he handed over his duffel bag at the ticket counter.
He would never have attempted to get a weapon through security if not for an article he’d read and memorized at the Academy. The Baltimore Sun had reported on an assortment of recent undercover attempts to get weapons and explosive devices through airport x-ray machines, and they’d had an alarmingly high success rate.
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