Christ, how was he going to say this without completely ruining it again?
Ben squeezed his hand. ‘You didn’t kill her. You didn’t kill either of them. And you didn’t cause the accident. All you did was tell her the truth about how you felt.’
His heart stuttered. ‘About how I still feel.’ He sighed. ‘But the way you looked when I told you. I thought you’d never want to see me again.’
Ben stroked the back of Toby’s hand. ‘It was a lot to take in, but I didn’t blame you. I kept thinking how awful you must have felt and how long it must have weighed on you to keep it secret. I should have tried harder. I let you down.’ The stroking stopped and Ben hung his head.
How could he think he ever let me down?
Toby reached up and placed his hand on Ben’s cheek, lifting his head so he could see his eyes shimmering. ‘You saved my life. How about we call it even?’
Relief broke across Ben’s face and his smile returned. Toby grabbed the front of his shirt and pulled him down to his lips. Ben readied for a kiss but Toby paused, revelling in the faux indignation in Ben’s eyes. He laughed. ‘I love you, Ben Fields.’
Toby kissed him, softer and slower than before, and his heart bloomed, a green shoot emerging out of the desolation to heal a dry land that had lain barren for far too long.
Epilogue
Four months later…
‘Are you sure it’s this way?’ Toby skittered down another bank of rocks. When Ben suggested they come to the springs, he’d expected it would be to where they’d first kissed. He hadn’t expected it to look so unfamiliar. The rains had encouraged some life back to the land but a lot had changed in ten years.
Ben halted a few metres ahead, his long stride having carried him further down a path only he knew. His shoulders slumped. When he turned, his lips had bowed into a pout. ‘You mean you don’t remember?’
Goof.
Toby rolled his eyes, causing him to miss his footing and slip. His arms flailed as he skidded over sand and stones and slammed into Ben’s chest. He was saved from hitting the dirt but the air punched out of his lungs. Looking up into Ben’s smiling face, it took even more effort for his breath to return.
‘If you wanted a hug, you only had to ask.’ Ben wrapped his arms around him and squeezed, hard and rough.
Toby laughed. ‘Get off, Strawberry.’
Ben bent close to his ear. ‘Anything you say, Grim,’ he growled. His breath tickled his ear and roused more than the hairs on his skin. Ben pecked him on the cheek and released his bear hug, substituting it for a firm grip on Toby’s left hand, and returned to his mission through tree stumps and charcoal shrubs. Splashes of green, white and red caught his eye as nature returned. But as they descended deeper into the gully and towards the water, the forest thickened. His footsteps crunched over a carpet of grasses and scrub and leaf litter. He’d known the whole forest hadn’t been lost but to see this much…
‘You didn’t tell him the exact location, did you?’
Ben gave him a sly smile and continued towards the river, rounding a boulder taller than Ben.
There it was.
Their place.
The trees had grown bigger, the reeds thickened, but there was no denying the C-shape of the pool, smaller than the more popular locations farther upstream, and its position beneath the shadow of three giant triangular rocks. He could even hear the laughter.
He strolled alongside Ben towards a flat rock jutting over the edge of the pool. They’d lain there with their friends and he’d stolen glances at Ben’s long body, wishing he could touch his tanned skin. Furtive looks lengthened until Ben noticed and winked. His heart had flapped in his throat like a caught trout gasping for air.
‘I’m surprised you could find it again.’ He’d never returned after his mother had died.
‘I came here a lot,’ Ben said, ‘hoping I could find some answers about what was going on with you.’
Toby squeezed his hand.
‘After the fires, I wanted to find it again. It took time. We’d have come sooner but our schedules haven’t been the greatest.’
It was one drawback of both partners doing shift work. Much of their time had been spent rebuilding Toby’s house and helping Narelle care for his dad. And Ben was trying for a promotion too, so he was putting in extra hours. Thankfully they had all those times when they woke up together or he fell asleep with his head in the crook of Ben’s arms.
Ben slipped the backpack off his shoulder and pulled out a picnic blanket, laying it down on the rock. He removed his tank top, exposing the built chest and abs and the light brown hair that extended past the waistband of his shorts. Desire rumbled deep in Toby’s belly, so long denied it reared easily now, knowing it could be sated. To think that this man was his: beautiful, strong and caring. He bit his lip.
Ben saw him gawping and made his pecs dance, a dumb move that brought out his smile and the heat to his cheeks. He reached forward and pawed at Toby’s shirt.
And I’m his.
He allowed Ben to pull his shirt over his head, then once freed, rushed forward and kissed him hard. He’d never get tired of Ben’s lips. He had ten years’ worth of kisses to collect.
‘What was that for?’ Ben asked when he was finally allowed to take a breath.
‘Like you need a reason.’ He sat on the rug and pulled off his shoes and socks while Ben settled next to him and busied himself in his bag.
Toby leaned back and looked across the water, memories flowing around him of not only the first time they kissed—behind that gum tree—but the time they’d made love behind the middle rock. He blushed. Quick, frantic, but fun and gentle and…
He leaned forward to cover his hardness. Perhaps they needed a repeat. That is if Officer Ben could overlook the indiscretion. He grinned and opened his mouth to suggest the idea, but his lover’s smile was cautious as he looked at the letter in his hand.
Cold water trickled down Toby’s spine and dripped into a cavern where light and life struggled to emerge. He’d wondered if Ben had kept it, but he thought it too dangerous to ask. If he didn’t know for sure, he could pretend it had never been written.
Stupid but still…
‘I was wondering what you did with.’
‘You’re not pissed I’ve got it?’ A shadow stole across Ben’s eyes.
‘Why? You wrote it.’
‘To you.’ He paused. ‘This was dumb. Forget I mentioned it.’ He started to put it back in his bag, his body closing away from him like a torch fading into the gloom.
Panic prickled in Toby’s chest. He’d faced deadly fires but the darkness hid his terrors. He needed Ben’s light but he had to be the one to reach for it. Toby grabbed the letter and opened it.
Ben’s blue scrawl bled out of the past. The words had started to fade—both on the page and from his memory—but combined they brightened.
‘Dear Toby.’ Pain clamped a fist around his throat. He’d never read it aloud before, frightened to be overheard and certain he couldn’t have got through it without doubling over in anguish. But that was then. He cleared his throat and his voice broke free. ‘All I want is to know that you’re okay. There’s not much else I can hope for now. We used to tell each other everything.’
Ben scooted over to sit behind him. His arm slipped around his waist and his chin rested on Toby’s shoulder. The warmth from Ben’s skin spread through Toby’s back.
‘I know you must be hurting because of the accident. I know because I’m hurting too. But it’s worse because I don’t have you. Why can’t we get through this together?’
Pressure mounted behind his eyes, holding back tears he’d shed in private when his sorrow had become too great. God, how he’d wanted to tell Ben. He closed his eyes and breathed, leaning into Ben’s warmth so it could ease the chills rising through his body. Ben knew now and Ben still loved him. The warmth grew and the tension in his eyes eased. He blinked and his vision cleared.
‘It hurts so much to se
e you and not be with you. You won’t answer my texts, my emails, my calls. All I see is you but you look through me. Please, Toby, I love you. Ben.’
The water burbled over the rocks as it flowed into the pool. The leaves rustled in the trees as a light breeze buffeted the gully. Sunshine cascaded down to dance across their skin. Magpies sang.
And Ben’s heart beat against Toby’s back.
‘What do you want to do with it?’ Ben asked, his hold still tight.
The letter had been a part of him for so long. Knowing that Ben had loved him—even without him knowing the truth—had been a glimmer of hope. Not strong enough to guide his way out, but bright enough to know there was one.
But now it showed a lack of faith—the faith of a boy and a man who’d failed to accept the love offered in his darkest hour. He had no such lack of faith now. The past unlocked its shackles from his heart and emerged into a bright future.
A future with Ben.
‘I love you, Ben.’ His whisper shook with the weight of his affection. He folded the letter and tore it in half then again and again. He opened his hands and the fragile pieces caught and scattered on the wind. He relaxed into Ben’s arms, sinking into the comfort that he gave so freely.
Consoler, protector, lover.
He reached behind to rub the back of Ben’s scalp, enjoying the soft sandpaper feel on his palm and the way that Ben leaned into it and moaned.
‘I love you too, Toby.’
Thank you for reading Embers and Echoes. I hope you enjoyed it.
If you’d like to know more about me, my books, or to connect with me online, you can visit my webpage or like my Facebook page.
Website: danieldelorne.com
Facebook: danieldelorne
You can also follow me through my publisher’s page here www.escapepublishing.com.au
Reviews can help readers find books, and I am grateful for all honest reviews. Thank you for taking the time to let others know what you’ve read, and what you thought.
You’ve just read a book in the Echo Springs series. The books in this series are:
Dangerous Echoes — Leisl Leighton
Embers and Echoes — Daniel de Lorne
Echoes of the Past — TJ Hamilton
Hope Echoes —Shannon Curtis
If you liked Embers and Echoes, here are my other books:
Beckoning Blood
Burning Blood
Binding Blood (available December 2018 from Escape Publishing)
This book was published by Escape Publishing. If you’d like to sample some more great books from my fellow Escape Artists, please turn the page.
Bestselling Titles by Escape Publishing...
Dangerous Echoes
Leisl Leighton
Blue lights in the red dust...
Echo Springs on the edge of the outback – a town where everyone knows your name, and your business. But the wholesome country living and welcoming community aren’t what they used to be. Echo Springs has a dark underbelly, and it is seeping ever outward.
Brilliant forensic pathologist, Erika Hanson, fled from Echo Springs as a teenager, leaving behind a past of tragedy and pain. But when local police announce they’ve found her beloved brother’s body in a meth lab explosion, she knows she must return to clear Peter’s name and find out what really happened. Because Peter would never get involved with the drug tag sweeping across the small town of Australia and destroying lives.
Hartley Cooper has a past with Erika Hanson, but that’s not going to keep him from doing his job. He’s seen what grief can do, and denial is only the first step. But Erika is convinced that Peter can’t be involved, and her meticulous, professional skills start to convince Hartley as well. When Erika’s digging and questions get too personal, the town turns against them, Hartley knows Erika might run again. But this time he’s ready. And he’s not going to let her go.
Echo Springs, book 1
Echoes of the Past
TJ Hamilton
Blue lights in the red dust...
Echo Springs on the edge of the outback – a town where everyone knows your name, and your business. But the wholesome country living and welcoming community aren’t what they used to be. Echo Springs has a dark underbelly, and it is seeping ever outward.
Born on the wrong side of the tracks to a family well–known for all the wrong reasons, Leila Mayne’s childhood was marked with suspicion and derision from the people of Echo Springs. But her heart has always belonged to this town, so after graduating from the academy, she returns sporting a shiny new badge and the desire to be an agent of change. But change isn’t easy, and Echo Springs isn’t ready to accept a Mayne on the right side of the law. Everyone except her childhood sweetheart, the man she ran away from and has spent her time trying to forget.
Hayden is as big and beautiful and supportive as ever. But he has secrets, dark secrets. Secrets that could destroy the integrity and fresh start Leila has worked so hard for. When it comes to a battle between her heart and her badge, Leila knows that there can be no winners, and she will lose everything.
Echo Springs, book 3
Hope Echoes
Shannon Curtis
Blue lights in the red dust...
Echo Springs on the edge of the outback – a town where everyone knows your name, and your business. But the wholesome country living and welcoming community aren’t what they used to be. Echo Springs has a dark underbelly, and it is seeping ever outward.
Jacinta Buchanan understands stress. Between trying to keep the family farm going and convince her father that she’s the best (and only) option to take over permanently, she has a lot on her plate. So when one of the old mines on the property blows up, killing a local teenager, she can barely hold it together. But finding out that she’s a suspect and the cop sent to investigate her is her brother’s best friend is the absolute last straw.
Country cop Mac Hudson is used to disappointment. He’s watched friends, classmates, townspeople he likes and respects cross the line time and time again, and it’s his job to dole out the consequences. But discovering that Jac Buchanan has a meth lab on her property is an unexpected blow, so when she hatches a plan to prove her innocence and draw out the real culprits, he agrees to go along. But there’s a darkness on Bull’s Run that runs deeper than they expect and a darkness in Echo Springs that stretches further than they can imagine. In their quest for the truth, Jacinta and Mac will have to risk the town they both love and the future they’re only beginning to imagine.
Echo Springs, book 4
The Echo Springs anthology is available in print September 2019.
Echo Springs
Leisl Leighton, Daniel DeLorne,
TJ Hamilton and Shannon Curtis
Wholesome country living isn’t what it used to be… This town has a dark side, but what will these cops sacrifice to save it? A compelling suspense, set in the outback.
Blue lights in the red dust...
Echo Springs on the edge of the outback – a town where everyone knows your name, and your business. But the wholesome country living and welcoming community aren’t what they used to be. Echo Springs has a dark underbelly, and it is seeping ever outward.
Four cops...
The small police station is overrun, and officers are working overtime to stem the tide of illegal activity from graffiti through to murder. From prickly Leila to heartsore Ben, Cooper with something to prove to Mac who’s driven to succeed, the Echo Springs force is determined to keep the town safe.
Putting everything at risk...
But the stakes are higher than they’ve ever been, and it’s not just the town these officers have to keep safe. It’s their hearts as well. With bullets flying and bodies piling up, they will have to decide how much they’re willing to risk and what they’re willing to lose.
Look out for the Mindalby Outback Romance series, available now from Escape Publishing!
Cotton Field Dreams
SE Gilchrist
Mindalby, a small town, a community, a home. But when the mill that supports the local cotton farmers and employs many of the town’s residents closes unexpectedly, old tensions are exposed and new rifts develop. Everyone is affected and some react better than others, but one thing is certain: living on the edge of the outback means they have to survive together, or let their town die.
Sasha comes to Mindalby to recover from a traumatic event, plan her next move, and seek out information to avenge her beloved uncle — the last thing she wants is a relationship. But when she meets local single dad, Cole, she can’t help but be drawn to his warmth and his humour, and his two engaging children. Cole says and does all the right things, and Sasha finds herself falling, but will all of her secrets destroy the relationship before it has a chance to begin?
Starting Over
Susanne Bellamy
Mindalby, a small town, a community, a home. But when the mill that supports the local cotton farmers and employs many of the town’s residents closes unexpectedly, old tensions are exposed and new rifts develop. Everyone is affected and some react better than others, but one thing is certain: living on the edge of the outback means they have to survive together, or let their town die.
When fashion designer Serena Quinlan arrives in Mindalby for the annual cotton festival, she is hoping to do two things: meet local leather worker Paul Carey and check out all the 50-year-old men to see if they might be her father. She doesn’t expect the explosive attraction she feels towards Paul, nor the untimely and unwanted arrival of her ex-fiance. When her search for her father leads to unexpected results, Serena will be torn between the past she came searching for and the possibility of a future she never expected.
Embers and Echoes Page 13
