Placing me down on shaky legs we kiss. After a few minutes he breaks away and we both take a minute to catch our breath. “So fucking good,” he says and kisses my nose while he reaches for my body wash. He pours it into his hands and starts to rub his hands on my body, washing me. He washes my neck, my arms, my chest and when he gets to my breasts he takes his time. He continues to rub them, causing my nipples to harden under his touch. I bite my lip as he pours more soap onto his hands. He squats down as he washes my legs and lets his body drag against mine as he stands back up. “Turn around,” he demands with heat in his eyes.
I do as he says and he pulls me against him, my back resting on his chest. He reaches around and washes my pussy. “Oh God,” I moan and drop my head back. He continues to rub his wet, soapy hand on me.
“Fuck yes, rub that sweet pussy on my hand. Come on me baby,” he whispers in my ear, bringing me closer to finding my release.
He picks up his pace and uses his other hand, pushing two fingers deep inside me. “Fuck,” I hiss. He fucks me with his fingers, while I ride them and then he rubs on my clit. I tighten around him and he bites down on the tendon between my neck and shoulder. That’s all it takes, another orgasm rips through me. “Fitz, oh fuck.”
He removes his fingers and spins me around. As soon as we make eye contact, he puts his fingers into his mouth, sucking them clean. It is so hot. “So sweet.” He kisses me, allowing me to taste myself and it is such a turn on. All too quickly he breaks the kiss and smiles at me. “I can’t seem to get enough of you, but you’re going to be late.”
“Shit,” I say, quickly rinsing off. “I completely forgot I had to work, damn it.”
“Relax, I’ll talk to your boss if you need me too,” he says when we step out of the shower.
I start to laugh as I dry off and he raises his eyebrows. “Sorry, but what are you going to say? Please excuse Brooklyn for being late, we had mind blowing shower sex?”
He smacks my ass as I’m wrapping the towel around myself and I let out a yelp. “That’s exactly what I’ll tell him.”
We both go into the bedroom to get dressed and I decide to just put my hair up in a wet bun since I’ve got to leave in fifteen minutes. I put on my white blouse and gray pencil skirt with black heels. Rushing over to the mirror to toss on a bit of makeup and when I’m finished I turn around. Fitz leans against the door frame with a small grin. “What?” I ask looking to see if something is out of place.
“I’ve never seen you in your work clothes before, it’s pretty hot,” he says, pushing off and stalking toward me. He wraps his arms around me and we hold onto one another. “Oh damn, Brooklyn. I don’t want to say goodbye.”
I can hear the sadness in his voice and it mimics how I feel. “I don’t either. I’m not ready.”
We finally pull apart and I swallow down the lump in my throat when I look at him. “My car is here, so if you’re ready to leave I’d like to leave together.”
I nod my head and walk to the front door, hand and hand. I grab my purse and keys and stop short. “Hey, did you take my car this morning?” I ask, laughing.
“Yep,” he says, giving me a wink. We get outside and he opens my door for me. We grab ahold each other and share one last kiss. It’s slow and full of unspoken words. We break apart too soon and he cups my cheek. “Call me when you get home. Please be careful.” I force a smile and he shakes his head. “Fuck, I’m going to miss you.”
“Me too,” I sadly say.
“Go, because in a minute I’m not going to be able to let you,” he says and I reluctantly climb into the driver’s seat. I close the door and roll the window down. He leans in and kisses me again. “Bye, Brooklyn.”
A tear escapes my eye and I quickly wipe it. “Bye, Fitz.” That’s it, that’s our time over. He gets into his car and the driver pulls away, taking my heart with them. I clear my throat and wipe beneath my eyes. “It’s only a few days, you can do this.”
**
The next few days are the longest of my life. My boss told me if I took extended leave that I’d lose my job. I told him I was taking it regardless and he let me go. I tried packing and realized I hate everything I own and now don’t have extra money to buy new ones. I talked to Fitz a few times, but not nearly as much as I was hoping. They are always busy and I’m starting to wonder if this was a good idea. I have no job which means no money. If I have no money coming in, I need to break into my savings and I hate that.
I toss and turn thinking of it all while waiting for Fitz to call me back. They had a shoot today and he said they wouldn’t be getting done until late. I miss him, more than I probably should at this point, but I can’t help it. I miss his hands on me, I miss the way he makes me feel, I miss the person I am when I’m with him.
My phone rings and I nearly fall out of bed reaching for it. “Hey beautiful,” he says when I answer it.
The second I hear his voice, my eyes close. “Hey. How was the shoot?” I ask. I haven’t told him that I was fired. I don’t want his sympathy or his money, so when we talk I keep the focus on him.
“It went good. How’s everything there? You all packed and ready?” he asks with such excitement in his voice.
“I’m all packed. What time will the car be here tomorrow?” I won’t lie to him and say I’m ready, because I just don’t know if I am.
“I told them to be there at eight, but they are instructed to wait as long as it takes for you to be ready. So no rush, but the car will be there at eight.” I hear everyone in the background and they are all laughing and having a good time.
“Okay. Listen, I hear what you’re missing out on. I’ll let you go,” I say and roll onto my side.
He’s quiet for a minute and suddenly, it is completely quiet on his end. “Brooklyn, what’s going on? You haven’t been yourself since I left and I’m getting worried. Are you having second thoughts?”
Christ, that’s not what I want him to think. “No, it’s not that. I’m just nervous I guess, but nothing to worry about. You can go hang with your friends.”
“You really don’t get it do you? How many times should I say this before you start to believe me? It’s you I want. I want to talk to you, be with you, fuck you, sleep with you, wake up with you. I don’t give a shit about anyone else or anything else. The only thing I’m missing out on right now, is being with you,” he says and I hear the hurt in his voice.
“Shit, I’m sorry. I guess I just don’t want to be the girlfriend that keeps her guy from doing the fun things,” I say.
He chuckles and says, “The only fun things I’m missing out on include you and a bed.”
We talk for the next hour and I feel my eyes starting to drift closed. “Fitz, I need to get some sleep, but just think tomorrow at this time we’ll be in bed together.”
“In bed, but definitely not sleeping,” he says, causing me to squeeze my legs together. Hell I used to go weeks, sometimes months with no sex. Now, my body is wound up after a few days.
“I can’t wait,” I say around a yawn.
“Get some sleep baby. I can’t wait to hold you in my arms tomorrow.”
After we hang up I close my eyes and start to feel my body being pulled under. I’m nervous for everything that will happen when I leave, but I miss Fitz too much not to go. I think I might be falling in love with him and that scares me more than anything else, because I know if I lose him I’ll lose everything.
I glance at my watch again and sip my coffee. “You know it’s only been five minutes since you last looked at your watch. She’ll be here soon,” Poppy says, pulling her legs under her on the couch.
I glance over at her and grin. “I know.”
“Well, I for one can’t wait until Brooklyn gets here. You’ve been a real dick since she’s been gone,” Ethen says, biting into his bagel.
He’s right I have been, but it’s not intentional. She’s been different, kind of distant when I talk to her and it’s fucking with me. When I left her house just five days
ago, she couldn’t wait to be back with me. Now I feel like she is pulling away and we haven’t even started this tour together. I’ll feel better once she’s here in my arms and I can get her to talk to me.
“You guys need to do sound check at noon,” Poppy says, looking down at her iPad.
I check my watch again. Brooklyn has an hour to get here or I’ll miss her. I get up and rub the back of my neck. “I’m going to shower.” I just need to stay busy, because my head is all fucked up right now. After taking a long shower, getting dressed, tuning my guitar, changing my shirt and eating a bagel, Brooklyn still isn’t here.
Nate comes to sit by me and slaps my back. “She’ll be here soon. Poppy is talking to her now to see how much longer until she gets here.”
I give a half grin and look down at my phone. I texted her a few times since she called me this morning, and I haven’t heard back. Now she’s on the phone with Poppy and I’m pissed and hurt. Now I definitely feel like something is going on with her.
Poppy walks inside and puts her phone in her pocket. “Fitz, I just got off the phone with Brooklyn. She’s not going to be here for a least forty five minutes. So you are going to have to wait until after sound check.” She looks at everyone else and smiles. “Alright, let’s go.”
Fuck. “Hey Poppy,” I say and nod my head to have her follow me to the bedroom. When we walk in I spin to look at her. “What the fuck is going on? She hasn’t texted me back, yet she answers the phone for you? Is she pissed at me, because I’m getting a real uneasy feeling here?” I pace the room, squeezing the back of my neck.
She lets out a little giggle and I frown looking at her. “I’m sorry Fitz. You are worrying for nothing. Everything is fine. I’ve been calling her all day and she just answered and told me she had no reception. She’s not ignoring you, she just more than likely didn’t get your texts.”
I stop my pacing and blow out a breath. “You really think so?”
She moves closer to me and smiles. “I really think so and I really think you are falling in love.”
She walks out of the bedroom and I just stare at the open door. Falling in love? I know I have feelings for her and that I am falling for her, but I’m not sure about love. Honestly, I’ve never been in love so I’m not sure that I would know, but maybe she has a point. Maybe that’s why I’ve been so crazy without her.
“Fitz, let’s fucking go,” Nate yells. I snap out of my thoughts and grab my guitar.
**
We’ve been doing sound check for almost an hour and I’m still not thrilled with it. I shake my head and look back at the guys. They all shake their heads and I grab the microphone. “Nope, still sounds like shit. I’m not sure what the fuck is going on, but we need to have this figured out before tonight.”
“Sorry, Fitz we’re working on it,” the stage manager says and rushes off.
“Well, they better fucking get it right because I’m about to flip shit,” Ethen says, walking up behind me.
“Christ, I don’t know what the problem is. Does anyone know how it went for our opening act?” I ask, looking around.
“No, I don’t think so,” Ralph says, taking a sip of his water.
“Alright guys, let’s try this again,” the stage manager says.
We all get back in place and I begin playing a few cords and the guys join in. I sing and it doesn’t sound too bad, so I figure I’ll keep going and see how it sounds. We get to the instrumental solo and I don’t know what they did, but it sounds great. I look over to the side of the stage and it’s like my world stops. Standing there with a huge smile on her face is my Brooklyn.
I don’t even think twice, I sling my guitar behind me and quickly walk off stage. She meets me half way and I pick her up, spinning her in a circle before crashing my lips to hers. The second our tongues collide it’s like no time has passed, yet it feels like an eternity. I break the kiss and smile at her. “Fuck, I missed you.”
She runs her hand down my cheek and keeps her eyes locked on mine. “I missed you too. Probably more than I should.”
“Oh baby, believe me I missed you just as much, if not more. I’ve done nothing but think of you and now that you’re here I finally feel happy again,” I admit.
“Oh Fitz,” she whispers and kisses me.
“I hate to interrupt this reunion, but can we finish sound check before the show starts?” Ethen yells.
I put her back onto her feet and wink at her. “I need to do this and then we can get out of here.” I walk back to center stage, feeling like a completely different person than the one who was just here. “Yeah, I’m sorry about that. My girl just got here and I needed to welcome her,” I say into the microphone and I’m sure the crew is all too excited to run with this bit of information. Thing is, I don’t give a shit anymore. She’s mine and I want the fucking world to know.
We finish sound check a half hour later, finally happy with the way it sounds. I just hope to hell they manage to do that tonight. We walk off stage and I grab Brooklyn, tossing her over my shoulder. She lets out a squeal and I laugh. We all head back to the bus, Brooklyn still over my shoulder and I climb in. “Be back, I need to talk to my girl,” I say and continue down to the bedroom. Walking in I want nothing more than to toss her on the bed, strip her naked and reacquaint myself with her body. I don’t do that though, I let her slide down my body and place my hands on either side of her face. “I’ve missed you more than you could imagine, but I need to be honest, I feel like something is wrong. So, I’m here asking you to be honest with me.”
She swallows a few times before pulling away from me and sitting down on the bed. I cross my arms, heart pounding in my chest and look down at her. She starts to chew her lip before looking up at me. “So things didn’t go like I planned,” she says, looking back down at the floor.
I sit beside her and lift her chin to look at me. “What happened?”
She takes a deep breath and blows it out. “I got fired,” she says, looking beaten down.
“Oh fuck,” I say and wrap my arms around her. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
She’s quiet for a while, just resting her head on my chest. I don’t know how to feel right now. I’m pissed that she didn’t tell me, so that I could be there for her. In the same breath, I’m sad watching how hurt she is right now. She finally sits up and gives a weak smile. “I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you to feel sorry for me. I know money is no object for you, but I needed my job.”
Yep, I’m pissed. “Just because money is no object for me doesn’t mean I wouldn’t understand. I wasn’t always rich and famous you know. I grew up with nothing. My parents worked their asses off and we never got ahead. When they were killed, I was only eighteen years old. I was working two jobs and trying to get shit going with the band. Don’t be so quick to judge because of what I have now.” She looks at me in shock and I shake my head. “You are right though, I do feel bad. It’s because of you coming on tour that you lost your job. I’ll figure it out, just tell me what you owe and how much you have.” I’ll just pay everything off for her and she can be pissed about it later.
“Fitz, I had no idea your parents passed away. I’m so sorry,” she says, climbing onto my lap and holding onto me.
I rub my hands on her back and lay my head on her chest. “I didn’t mean to blurt it out like that, but yes. They were killed in a car accident. They were the only family I had,” I lift my head and look at her. “Besides the guys and now you.”
“Oh Fitz,” she says and presses her lips to mine.
I break the kiss all too quickly and grin at her. “It’s alright baby, I miss them, but they are always with me. That’s why I got this tattoo,” I say and place my hand on the tattoo of my last name on my chest. She kisses me again and I smile against her lips. “Brooklyn, I want to know what you owe and when.”
She shakes her head and sighs. “I don’t want your money Fitz, that’s why I didn’t want to tell you. I have my savings and I just need to be fr
ugal until I find another job.”
Anyone else would have taken the money without so much as a second thought. Not my girl though, she wants to do things on her own and I give her a lot of fucking respect for that. I can’t say I’m happy about it and that I won’t stop offering to help, but I fucking respect it.
“Alright, we will figure it out. Anything else you need to tell me?” I ask, raising my eyebrows. I fucking hope not, because I need to be buried in her before the show tonight. She chews her lip and shakes her head. She’s lying. I use my thumb to release her lip and tilt my head. “No lies, remember.”
She closes her eyes and blows out a breath. “It’s nothing really. I was just disappointed about not being able to get some new clothes before coming.” Her eyes get wide as soon as I smile. “No way, I don’t want you to buy me anything. You wanted to know why I seemed distant and those are the reasons. I’m not asking or expecting anything.”
For now I’ll let it go, but she has to realize at some point that I want to and will give her everything I have to give. I want to take care of her not only emotionally and sexually, but financially. Right now though, I just need her worship her.
**
After spending a good two hours getting reacquainted, we lie in bed, wrapped around each other. “Brooklyn, you know we have a show tonight.”
She turns her head and smiles at me, sexual bliss still gleaming from her. “Of course I know.”
“So there will be a little pre party and a huge after party. Remember what I told you about the girls,” I say, wanting her to be prepared for everything that will happen.
“Fitz, relax. I’m not worried about any of it. I’m actually excited to see the show from the side of the stage,” she says and kisses my lips.
I roll on top of her and smile down. “Good, because that’s where I want you.”
“Yo, Fitz, Brooklyn, finish up and get out here for food and drinks,” Ethen yells through the door and I roll my eyes.
Renegade Page 18
