by Lauren Smith
Audrey had even spoken to Emily about her plan, hoping she would know how to help. She was quite knowledgeable when it came to outwitting her brother and his dashing League of Rogues. But Emily had warned her it carried too much uncertainty and risk, and asked her to wait. She planned to bring up the subject with their mutual friend Ashton, believing him to have the best chance of reasoning with Cedric.
However, Audrey was not a patient person. Horatia had inherited that trait, and Audrey envied her for it. No man ever coddled her or treated her like a babe still clinging to her mother’s skirts. Men treated Horatia with respect. If Audrey could get married, then perhaps people would have to take her seriously as well.
“Did you find what you were looking for?” Charles’s rich voice broke through her determined thoughts as he sat down next to her on the couch.
“Yes. I dropped my glove near the couch.” They were settled in Charles’s drawing room, completely alone. He hadn’t even been suspicious when she’d asked to stay a while longer after finding her “missing” glove. The time had come for her to reveal her hand and see what level of mischief she could achieve.
Charles lounged on the red velvet cushions, his golden hair tousled as though he’d just woken from a pleasant nap. Audrey felt her pulse leap, though more with excitement and guilt than attraction. But she was a Sheridan. She took pleasure in the thrill of the game. This was no exception.
Audrey rose from her chair, and smoothed her rose-colored muslin gown, trying to keep her hands from shaking. She knew she looked fetching tonight. She prayed it was enough to seduce Charles. Her russet brown hair hung loose in a Grecian fashion, wound with periwinkle blue ribbons. Despite her efforts, her hands continued to shake as she approached the loveseat. He looked at her curiously.
“What’s wrong, love? You’ve been awfully quiet this evening. You haven’t even tried to tell me about the latest fashions from Paris.”
Audrey held in a sigh. She was about to make him very angry, and she was already regretting it.
“Surely you don’t care what styles of gown are most in fashion?” She wrinkled her nose as she slid into the seat next to him and gave him a coy smile.
Charles chuckled, but it was a hesitant sound, as though he’d sensed something had changed. “Right, er, well, it was good to see Avery again, wasn’t it?”
Charles swallowed hard when Audrey moved several inches closer. He put his right hand down, as though hoping it would act as a barrier between their bodies. Audrey glanced down at it, then brushed a fingertip along the back of his hand in a sensual pattern. He jumped and yanked his hand back.
“Audrey,” he warned when she scooted over the last few inches, now pressed right against him. She could feel the heat of his body radiating from his dark blue waistcoat and tan breeches.
“Shh, my love. Not another word.” She leaned into his body, lips puckered.
Charles went rigid, then thrust out his hands, as though trying to ward off an evil spirit. His eyes were alight with panic and Audrey giggled, guiltily, enjoying the look of terror on the rake’s face. This was the infamous scoundrel Charles Humphrey, the Earl of Lonsdale, and he was frightened of her? She ducked under his arms and hopped onto his lap, twining her arms about his neck.
He squawked like a startled goose and fell off the love seat. Audrey, with a death grip on his neck, fell flat on top of him. He grunted beneath her and tried to shake her off.
“Kiss me, Charles.” Audrey captured his surprised mouth.
His struggling slowed. Audrey didn’t know the first thing about kissing, but it didn’t seem to be as romantic as she’d expected. Charles lay closed lipped beneath her, gray eyes glaring up at her. She blinked, released his lips and moved back a few inches.
“Are you quite done accosting me?” he asked.
Audrey frowned and forced her lips over his again, but still he refused to cooperate. She sighed, sat up and scowled. “You’re supposed to at least kiss me back. I have no idea if I’ve done enough to be properly compromised.” Audrey crossed her arms over her chest.
Charles leapt up so fast that Audrey toppled off his lap. He scrambled to his feet and moved behind the loveseat, as though the furniture would barricade him from her. She suspected this was the first time in his life he was the one trying to avoid unwanted advances.
“Properly compromised?” he snapped. “Audrey, what in God’s name are you playing at?”
“I want to be married. I want to be happy. That’s what I’m thinking.” She smoothed her skirts and climbed back onto the love seat. He stumbled as he beat a hasty retreat from her outstretched arms. He bolted for the door, but Audrey was fleet of foot and threw herself at the door just as it opened, slamming herself against him and the door at the same time.
Charles stared down at her, blinking rapidly. “Have you taken leave of your senses, woman?”
“Certainly not! I know exactly what I’m doing.” She tip-toed her fingers up his chest and he frantically, almost girlishly, swatted her hand away as though it were a fly he was trying to swat off.
“Audrey…you do not want to do this.” He suddenly picked her up by the waist and bodily set her aside so he could beat a hasty retreat away from her.
“Get back here!” she said and dove for him.
He spun, trying to avoid her, and tripped over the arm of a couch. With a little oomph! he landed on his back on the couch and she climbed onto him. “Now touch me. That’s what you’re supposed to do next.”
“Good God, Audrey! You are a genteel lady! You should not be doing this!”
“If it will get me married, I will do whatever I must!” She tried to lean down and kiss him.
“I’m certainly not going to marry you. It’s out of the question. Your brother—”
She giggled. “Oh I have no interest in marrying you. That would be ridiculous.”
Charles ignored the barb to his honor. “Then why try to seduce me?”
“Because when I tell Cedric you compromised me, he’ll see sense and let me marry.”
“After he shoots me!”
“Oh it wouldn’t come to that. At that point he’ll just be relieved I’ve settled down with someone other than you.”
“First you try to seduce me, then you tell me I’m not a marriageable option, then you suggest that anyone is a better option? You are not exactly winning my support, Audrey.”
“Honestly! Charles, we both know your reputation and… What are you doing?” He caught her by the upper arms and in a quick move, flipped her beneath him on the couch.
“I ought to teach you a lesson,” he growled. “If I’m not an option, then what is all of this nonsense about?” He pinned her against the cushions and he leaned over her, glaring.
“You’re the last person Cedric would let me marry. He knows your reputation better than anyone. I will be able to suggest someone preferable, and he’ll agree so I won’t have to marry you.”
“You’re forgetting one detail. Your brother is one of my closest friends. He might believe me when I say you were the one seducing me.” His hands on her arms were tight, but he didn’t hurt her.
“He would never believe that I tried to kiss you,” Audrey replied haughtily. “I’m the darling innocent child. You’re the seasoned rake.”
“You are too clever for your own damn good,” Charles said darkly. “But I remind you—your brother would shoot me dead. Is that what you want?”
“A bluff. He would never shoot his friend,” she insisted. “He just says that to scare away the weak and unworthy, like a test set up by a Greek god. The problem is, like those gods he makes them all but impossible to pass.”
“If that is what you truly believe, then you really are a child. Your brother wouldn’t hesitate to kill me if he thought I’d touched you inappropriately.”
Surely Charles wasn’t serious. Cedric would
never do that…at least not to his friends. Audrey’s eyes welled up. No one understood her frustration, especially her brother. Not one of her desired would-be suitors cared to seek her out after Cedric scared them off. It wasn’t fair that she was relegated to the back of the room when it came to the attentions of men. How was she supposed to get married if no man would dare look at her?
She wanted not the marriage so much as the man. She hated hearing the other girls speak of their beaux. While other girls her age were ignorant of the ways of men and women, Audrey had paid close attention to Emily and Godric, and she wanted what they had. She wanted to be desired and loved. Cedric had given her all the love a brother could but it was not enough. Audrey had yearnings, both physical and emotional, which she no longer had the desire to resist. Marriage was the best solution, and Jonathan was the one man she wanted desperately. She would do anything to claim him.
Audrey had even sought advice from a source she trusted to be frank with her on such matters. Evangeline Mirabeau, the Duke of Essex’s former mistress, was reputed to be one of the most desired ladies in London. She had agreed to meet Audrey for tea once a week over the last few months. She was an invaluable font of information and surprisingly, the two had become good friends. There was a fearlessness to her that Audrey admired and tried to emulate. Recently, Evangeline had tried to teach her the art of seduction so she might win over Jonathan. But first she needed to start with Charles.
Audrey needed to move this evening along to achieve her goal. Picturing in detail the tearing of her favorite gown, she managed to make herself cry. A lovely theatrical stream of tears ran down her cheeks.
“Don’t you dare!” Charles barked. “Don’t even think—”
Audrey blinked, causing more tears to flow.
“Bloody hell,” Charles groaned. “Audrey love, you know I didn’t mean to… That is to say…” Charles’s words died on his lips.
“I just want to get married!” Audrey wailed and tugged free of his hands. She threw herself against the back of the loveseat and buried her face in the crook of her elbow, a scheme that had worked countless times on her brother.
Charles sat down next to her, patting her back awkwardly. “There, there, love. It will all work out. You’ll see.”
“You don’t understand! Cedric frightens away all my suitors. No man wants to offer for me now. Even my dowry has ceased to draw the braver gentlemen to our door.”
“And your solution was to compromise yourself? Audrey, that’s not the most intelligent thing for you to do nor is it the healthiest for me. Why didn’t you speak to Cedric about this?”
“And have him yell at me? Declare outright that no man is good enough? I’m desperate Charles. I have needs and urges…”
“Er…I don’t believe you need enlighten me any further on those, and perhaps you ought to never tell your brother such a thing. Ever.”
“Oh it is so much easier for men. You can run out and find a mistress and—”
Charles cut her off. “Yes, it is easier for us. I don’t envy you your position in life.”
He seemed to understand. He was a rake for a reason. He understood women better than most, and he had to know they desired pleasure just as much as men. It was undeniably unfair that they had less freedom, at least the unmarried ladies.
Audrey had never believed that women were lesser creatures or deserved to be restricted. Something deep in her soul cried out at the injustice enforced by the church, by the courts, even by the newspapers. Not that she could explain that to most men. They had countless reasons for why women weren’t their equals and each made Audrey want to scream in outrage. Her single outlet into that world was one she had to keep a secret, even from Cedric. Even from Horatia. But it gave her a voice where before she had none.
Yet if she were married, she could do so much more. She could change herself, and no longer simply be a protected sibling. Perhaps she could work for changes for other women. Deep down, it was what mattered most to her. Having the right to do as she wished, and seeing such a right given to others.
“So what was your plan? Have me compromise you and then convince Cedric to marry you off quickly?”
“I know how he thinks. Besides, I had Emily speak to Ashton, and she said he promised to speak to Cedric about seeing to my marriage. He was supposed to recommend Jonathan as a suitable match. This night was simply meant to speed matters along.”
Charles smiled. “I suspected you liked him.”
“Oh I do, very much! But he doesn’t notice me.”
“He does, love, he does. I assure you.”
“Really?”
“Actually,” Charles snickered, “you frighten him quite out of his mind.”
Audrey jabbed him in the ribs. “That’s not making me feel any better.”
“If you want Jonathan, we will have to go about this carefully. Where your brother is concerned that’s always sound advice. As far as Jonathan goes, you ought to do to him what you did to me tonight. Men like aggressive women. Corner him, kiss him, make him know that you want him.” There was perhaps a glint of mischief in Charles’s eyes, but it did match with Evangeline’s advice
“Does that mean you’re going to help me?” She widened her eyes, giving him her best doe-eyed look, one that melted any man into a puddle at her feet.
“Of course. However, if this starts to turn bad, you must promise not to let that overprotective brother of yours shoot me. I rather enjoy being alive.”
“What are you going to do?” Audrey asked.
“I’m going to take you home tonight and it’s going to look like you’ve been compromised. So much so that he’ll no doubt want to kill me.”
Audrey blushed when she caught his meaning.
“And how will we achieve that?”
Charles took her by the hand and pulled her to her feet.
“You’ll see.”
Charles had a carriage summoned and within a few minutes he, Audrey and her lady’s maid, Gillian, were trundling along in the dark cobblestone roads towards Curzon Street.
“Come over here by me. We’ve got to fix your clothes and hair.” Charles patted the empty space on his side of the carriage.
“Miss!” Gillian gasped and grabbed Audrey’s arm to stop her. “You mustn’t!” Gillian had been left in the coach during Audrey’s adventure indoors, and a good thing too.
“Do stop being such a peahen, Gillian. Don’t you want me to get married? I’d much rather be a lady of my own house. Think of it! You could be a lady’s maid to the lady of a house. Wouldn’t that be better?” Audrey prayed Gillian would have some sense of ambition.
Gillian bit her lower lip. “I will keep quiet, Miss Audrey. But only because I know marriage would make you happy.” She turned to face Charles. “You will not kiss her, nor anything else I do not approve of.”
“Where were you a quarter of an hour ago?” Charles muttered.
A smile crept across Audrey’s lips. Her maid, normally shy, was showing a rare bit of courage and she thoroughly approved.
When Audrey took the seat next to him, he immediately cupped her face, then spread his fingers outward into her hair, mussing it up. He artistically pulled a few tendrils and wisps free here and there before nodding to himself in satisfaction.
Audrey glanced down at her gown. “What about my clothes?”
Charles frowned. “My dear, I’m going to have to go one step further. It will require your consent of course.”
“Oh?”
“Yes. Your hair is mused, but the clothes…well, and your lips of course.”
“What about my lips?” Audrey touched her mouth, not understanding his meaning.
“You need to bite them hard to ensure the authentic appearance.”
She did as instructed and bit her lower lip and pinched her cheeks for extra color. Charles began to crush he
r gown around her knees, wrinkling it. He tugged one of her sleeves down over her shoulder. Charles caught her chin and examined her carefully just as the carriage rolled to a stop.
“That should do it,” he said with an approving smile.
Audrey raised a trembling hand to her lips. They felt swollen, plump and then she understood what Charles had meant. She looked properly compromised, and she certainly felt compromised.
“What do you think, Gillian?” asked Charles.
“I think I’d have slapped you had I seen her come home looking like that.”
“Perfect!” said Audrey.
“Ready to play your part?” Charles’s amused countenance turned to one of annoyance as he assumed the false air of an angry rake as the carriage came to a stop.
“Just one more detail, I think.” She ripped her gown near the shoulder, letting one strap fall off her shoulder.
Audrey donned her own mask of rage and let him drag her out of the carriage and up to her brother’s door. She fought off a giggle as Charles beat on the door with a closed fist. Charles would be lucky if Cedric didn’t shoot him after all.
Chapter Eight
Alone in his study, Cedric slumped in a chair, legs stretched out in front of the fire. The embers crackled and spat, reflecting his mood. He had much on his mind, the safety of his sisters at the forefront. In one hand he loosely twirled his silver lion’s head cane. It was an old habit, one that used to irritate his mother, God rest her soul.
The clock on the mantelpiece ticked in the heavy silence. The sound grated on his ears. He hated an empty house, truly hated it. Since his parents had died, it had just been him and his sisters. Often that was enough. But tonight he was alone and the dark thoughts that engulfed him were almost overwhelming. He shuddered, wracked with an uneasy sensation that something was wrong.
The cane fell from his fingers, thumping on the carpet below. He propped his elbows on his knees and buried his face in his hands. Was it possible that his life was slowly unraveling? Audrey had her first come out this year during the Little Season in London, and far too many suitors had tramped through his door throughout October and November. Thankfully he had managed to frighten all of them off.
