After I finished, I remained on my knees and attempted to trace a sigil. I formed the lines well enough, but when I tried to draw power to make it more than mere scratches in the dirt I might as well have wished for fairies to appear.
Footsteps approached. I straightened to see Idris jogging up the trail, face contorted with anger. He’d recovered quickly from being caught in the edge of the ritual. Eilahn wasn’t far behind him, pale but no less determined.
“We need to keep moving,” Idris said, tone harsh as he passed us without a second glance. Pellini helped me up, but Eilahn scooped me out of his grasp.
“Not much farther,” she said. She hurried me up the trail after Idris, leaving Pellini behind.
I clung to her arm as I staggered along. “Where’s Pellini? He helped. He stopped it.”
“He follows.”
I craned my head around, relieved to see him with his gun out and ready as he surveyed the woods in all directions, covering our retreat.
“My arcane senses will return?” I asked Eilahn, desperation making my voice crack. “What McDunn did to me will wear off, right?”
“You are a summoner,” she replied, implacable.
I gulped. “Not if I can’t touch or see the arcane.”
“Precisely.”
A brief flare of exasperation pushed aside my fear. “Yeah, and I can’t touch or see the arcane.”
“I know this,” she said, speaking slowly and clearly. “You are a summoner. Summoners see and touch the arcane.” She nodded as if certain it would all be clear to me now.
Dismayed, I gave up debating the point. Did she understand what I was experiencing? Not that I was sure I understood. But for the first time I wondered if there was a logical gap in her thinking. To her it was clear: summoners could see and touch the arcane. I was a summoner. Therefore, I could see and touch the arcane. Except that she couldn’t seem to grasp that the reverse was also true: without the arcane a person wasn’t a summoner. Maybe she couldn’t comprehend such a radical change? Perhaps to her it was like a terrier saying it wasn’t a dog anymore. I couldn’t blame her. I didn’t want to comprehend it either.
Idris stood a few feet back from the end of the trail, listening and sensing. He traced his fingers over the bark of a tree beside him, shaping an alarm sigil to notify him if people passed near—though I only knew what it was because I recognized the wrist-straining twist of his hand at the end. Eilahn stopped a short distance behind him and made a careful scan of the road and truck that waited beyond the edge of the woods. Her nostrils flared delicately as she scented the air and assessed for active or potential threats. After another tense moment she said, “I sense nothing amiss.”
Pellini clicked open the locks with his remote. “Y’all get in,” he said, still on guard. Eilahn helped me into the back and got me buckled, while Idris threw himself into the front passenger seat and slammed the door. Pellini climbed in and started the truck, then performed a quick three-point turn and got us on our way.
“Feeling any better?” he asked, looking at me in the rear view mirror.
No, everything’s wrong! I wanted to yell, but I held it back and offered a shrug instead. “I don’t feel like puking quite as much.”
“They knew we were coming,” Idris said, hands clenched into fists on his thighs. “The fracture of the valve threw them off, but they were waiting for us.”
The truck jolted over a rough bump, and I gritted my teeth against the answering queasiness. “We were cocky and got caught,” I said once I could speak. A shiver passed through me, and I rubbed the gooseflesh on my arms. No matter how hard I tried to see the arcane, the world remained dull and ordinary.
“We walked right into it!” Idris raged, face red. “Katashi was right there! We could’ve had him if we’d blasted him in the first place like I said!” He shot me an accusing glare.
My battered self-control disintegrated into pain and loss and fear in the face of his oh-so-righteous anger. “I’m sorry,” I screamed at him. “I’m so fucking sorry I fucked your day up by getting caught in their trap!”
He swiveled to stare at me, annoyance drawing his mouth into a deep frown. “What the hell is wrong with you?”
My hands trembled. “While I was so inconveniently caught in that trap, McDunn . . . did something to me.”
“What are you talking about?” His eyes narrowed. “He enhances talents and intimidates people. That’s pretty much it.”
Did he think I faked the puking and feeling like shit? “Who knows, maybe this was his first time,” I said stiffly. “But what he did to me was the opposite of enhancement.”
It took him only a second to grasp my meaning. “Damn. I didn’t know that was possible.” His mouth twisted in thought. “They wanted you neutralized, not dead.” He exhaled. “Then again, with Rhyzkahl’s and Szerain’s influence on you along with Kadir’s, it’s safer for everyone now. Even you.”
For a moment I couldn’t breathe, shocked to my core as much by the casual delivery of the comment as the words themselves. Would he be this casual if they’d killed me? Gee, that’s too bad, but at least we’re all safer.
Pellini’s hands spasmed tight on the steering wheel. “You’d best turn your ass around and keep your mouth shut for a little while, son,” he ordered. Idris opened his mouth to respond, but I found my voice first.
“Did you just say . . .” My voice shook so much I had trouble getting the words out. I shoved to sit more upright and tried again. “Did you just say it’s fine and cool that I’ve lost my arcane ability because it’s safer?”
He scowled. “Sure. For now. You’re not a player anymore.” His tone was patronizing, as if I was an emotional idiot to be so worked up instead of seeing the bigger picture. “You won’t be a target, and they can’t use you. It buys us a little breathing room.” He finished with a there-you-go shrug that sent my fury spiraling higher.
“You arrogant, unfeeling asshole!” I sputtered. “Would you say the same thing if I’d been blinded? Because that’s what it feels like. That’s what it is!”
“Blinded?” he said, incredulous. “Give me a break, Kara. It’s not the same thing at all. I get that it sucks, but at least some good comes of it.”
Gravel crunched under the tires as Pellini pulled the truck onto the shoulder and threw it into park, but I barely heard it over the hammering of my pulse. “And it’s cool that you still have all your skills,” I said through ragged, uneven breaths, “because you’re so perfect and untouched and uninfluenced?”
“I never said I was perfect,” Idris retorted, face flushed, “but I’ve been cleared by Mzatal and Elofir.”
Agonizing rage tore at my essence. “Cleared?” I let out a harsh sound—more sob than laugh. Loss and betrayal goaded me on. “You’re hauling around more influence than everyone in this truck put together considering Rhyzkahl’s your dad!”
Idris gave me a withering look. “That’s the best insult you can come back with?”
“Enough of this bullshit!” Pellini snapped. “I’m taking Kara home.” He leveled a black glare at Idris. “You either shut up or get out and walk.”
But my reply spewed out. “We’re cousins,” I snarled at Idris. “I have the DNA results to prove it. My aunt was manipulated to think her baby was stillborn. But he wasn’t. He arrived after she spent time in the demon realm. With Rhyzkahl.”
Silence descended. Idris glared at me, a heartbreaking range of emotions galloping through his eyes. After several tense seconds he flung open the door, climbed out and slammed it, then strode off down the highway shoulder.
Pellini muttered a stream of obscenities under his breath and killed the engine. “My goddamn truck better be here when I get back,” he said then pulled himself out and started after Idris.
Two seconds later I opened my door and vomited onto the gravel, dry heaving when nothing more came up. After a moment the nausea faded, and my rage drained away with it, leaving me empty and cold. My cheeks were wet, but I d
idn’t know when I’d started crying. Nice going, Kara.
Shaking, I pushed myself upright and closed the door. I made a tentative mental reach for Mzatal but pulled back when I felt nothing. I didn’t have it in me to extend and try again. Not now. Couldn’t face that possible loss yet.
I abruptly realized Eilahn had gone silent and unmoving, and a fresh wave of misery settled over me. Had she known about Rhyzkahl and Idris? I found it difficult to believe she had, not that it mattered at this point. I wouldn’t blame her one bit for being furious at me for blurting that out. Even if she wasn’t, I was angry and upset enough at myself for both of us. “Eilahn?” I said tentatively. “Are you okay?”
“I am well, Kara Gillian,” she replied, voice steady and without the faintest hint of anger. She was disturbed, though. I’d known her long enough to recognize how unease manifested in her human form. A faint crease between her eyebrows. Her lower lip jutting out ever so slightly. No. She hadn’t known.
I lowered the window, suddenly desperate for air or a breeze or maybe a tornado that could suck me up and away from all of this. A few seconds later Eilahn lowered the window on her side, though her forehead remained creased.
A breeze drifted through, bringing an earthy aroma of grass and moss and pine that clashed with the stench of hot asphalt. The buzz of cicadas mingled with the rat-tat-tat of a woodpecker, and in the distance a hawk screamed. I dropped my head back against the seat and tried to chill, but I couldn’t stop reaching mentally for something that wasn’t there. I also couldn’t stop trying to figure out where we went wrong. How had Katashi been so certain we’d show up? Yes, we’d followed clues, but none of them were glaringly obvious. In fact, if we hadn’t listened to that phone call, we never would’ve . . .
Shit. We’d gobbled up their lures like hens on corn. Angus McDunn had worked with Bryce for fifteen years. He knew how thorough Bryce was, and he’d been confident Bryce would find the “dropped” piece of paper that led us to the horse farm and Catherine McDunn.
My mouth tightened as I replayed the conversation in my head. It had all been an act. If she hadn’t dropped the info about the calls from Angus, we wouldn’t have heard “number six” and known where and when to walk into the trap. Yeah, she was good. I couldn’t wait to have another nice chat with her—as soon as I stopped feeling like pounded shit.
“That was fucked up how Kara dropped that on you.” Pellini’s voice, barely audible and only because the breeze was right. I peered ahead and saw Idris sitting on the grass ten or so yards in front of the truck, head in his hands and elbows on his knees. Pellini sat crosslegged a half dozen feet from him. I slumped down a little so I could still see, but not be quite so obvious I was watching them. I was already an asshole for using personal information about Idris as a weapon. No need to add to it by flagrantly invading the privacy he needed right now.
“It can’t be true,” Idris said after a moment, voice unsteady.
“Well, so what if it is?” Pellini replied with a shrug. I knew I should close the window and stop being an intrusive jerk, but I didn’t.
A motorcycle zoomed past, covering Idris’s reply. “Look,” Pellini said, “one thing you do know is that you have a fuckload more potential than you ever imagined.”
“I guess so. If it’s true.” A pause, followed by an incredulous, “The demonic lords have children?”
I snuck a quick glance at Eilahn. I suspected she’d been surprised by that detail as well. Note to self: don’t ever let anyone entrust you with a really sensitive secret ever again. Dumbass.
Pellini blew out a breath. “I’ve known Kara a long time. She can be a stone cold bitch when pushed too far, but I’ve never seen her lie or throw out something that big without knowing for sure.”
Wonderful. I was a bitch who knew her shit. This was a prime example of why eavesdropping was a Bad Idea. Yet I still didn’t raise the window. Hell, I deserved to hear any and all criticism. Plus, I was nosy.
“She’s my cousin.” A rustle of grass and gravel as Idris stood. “Tessa is my birth mother . . . and Katashi has her.” Even from this far away I heard the dread and horror in his voice. Katashi had brutalized his sister. Idris had no reason to believe Tessa couldn’t be subject to the same fate even though Katashi treated her well now. “I’m going to kill him,” he said, rage in his voice once again. Gravel crunched as he strode toward the truck.
“Idris. Stop.”
To my surprise, he did.
Pellini clambered to his feet and caught up to Idris.
“You and I need to get something straight,” Pellini said. The words carried clearly with them nearer. “I didn’t ask for any of this shit, but since I’m in it neck deep the only thing I can do is make the best of it. Because of that, because I’m on this team or posse or whatever the hell you want to call it, I consider you a teammate. I’ll go the distance for you and pound anyone who tries to fuck you over.”
Silence as they faced each other.
“But?” Idris finally replied.
“It’s not a ‘but.’ It’s an ‘and,’” Pellini said, voice hard and uncompromising. “And the same goes for Kara. She’s my teammate, too. As wrong as she was to dump that crap about your parents on you, you were just as wrong to tell her it’s no big deal that she lost a fundamental aspect of who she IS.”
Damn it, my face was getting all wet again.
Pellini wasn’t finished. “This arcane and demon-summoning shit is everything to her. She doesn’t know it, but I’ve done a shitload of checking up on her. I’m pretty sure that becoming a summoner saved her life when she was younger.”
Wait, what? He knew my history of acting out with drugs? Jeeeez.
“So if I hear one more fucking word from you about how it’s better for everyone that she had the craft she loves ripped away from her,” Pellini continued, tone harsh enough to melt stone, “I’ll pound you flat, and I don’t care who the fuck your daddy is. Y’got me?”
“Yeah,” Idris replied, all belligerence gone. “Yeah, I do.”
“Good,” Pellini said, friendly again. “Let’s get back to the house so we can regroup and figure out what to do next.”
I stabbed the window button as they approached, relieved when Eilahn did the same. A few seconds later the guys climbed into the truck and closed the doors. Pellini pulled back onto the highway, and we rode in taut silence.
After several minutes Idris cleared his throat and gave me a sad and uncertain look. “Sorry I was a dick.”
I nodded. “Sorry I dropped a bombshell like that on you.”
He returned my nod, and I knew we were cool again.
“Katashi has my mother.” His shoulders tensed.
“He’s been her mentor for thirty years,” I said, unable to keep the stress from my words. “For what it’s worth, I don’t think she’s in danger.” I hated that. And I hated that I hated that. I didn’t want her to be in danger. But I also didn’t want her to be so close to Katashi.
“He’s not soft.”
“No,” I said. “But he rewards loyalty.”
He stared out the window. “Especially if it fits his plan.”
Chapter 24
Idris made a quick call to Bryce to tell him things didn’t go as planned but everyone survived—in about as many words. Aside from that, the ride back to the house remained devoid of conversation.
The quiet gave me way too much time to obsessively review the entire incident. I ached for a nugget of information that would miraculously reverse what happened to me or give me a shred of hope that the effect was temporary. When that line of thinking grew too frustrating, I gave myself a headache by trying to sense the arcane, mentally “squinting” into a spectrum I could no longer see.
But at least I didn’t feel the need to puke anymore. Woo.
Pellini pulled up to the gate and hit the button on the remote. I straightened. “Y’know, we should go to the store while we’re out. We need laundry detergent.”
Eilahn put
a hand on my arm. “Enough detergent remains for forty-three normal loads. Your request is irrational.” She opened her door as I scowled at her response. I really really wanted to go to the store. Why was that irrational? “Remain in the vehicle,” she commanded, stepping down from the truck. “Vincent Pellini will drive behind me.” With that, she closed the door and walked toward the gate.
My annoyance gave way to bafflement. “What the hell?”
Idris grimaced. “Aversion wards. They’re attuned to you.”
“Of course they are,” I began, then my heart sank. I cast a despairing look at Idris. “No. They were. They were attuned to the me who had an arcane signature. They don’t recognize me as me.” Because I wasn’t “me” anymore.
Pellini winced and muttered a curse but kept watching Eilahn as she worked. Idris let out a heavy breath then climbed out to help her. I dropped my head back against the seat, gut aching as if I’d been sucker-punched. The urge to do random shopping eased as Eilahn and Idris reworked the wards, but left sick emptiness in its wake.
Pellini followed the pair to the house, parked and killed the engine. He looked at me with worry, but Eilahn bundled me out of the truck before he could speak. Idris set out toward the backyard without a word to anyone.
“You will take a long bath,” Eilahn told me. “That always lifts your mood and helps you relax.”
Pellini headed into the house. I paused at the bottom of the steps and struggled without success to see the warding, to feel the nexus.
Eilahn nudged me forward, and this time I didn’t resist.
Pellini was already in the kitchen when I entered, and Jill and Bryce sat at the table.
“There’s meatloaf on the stove,” Jill said to Pellini. Her eyes rested on me, gaze filled with deep concern. She knew me too damn well to miss that I was a wreck.
I couldn’t stomach the idea of rehashing the nightmare with the others. “You should go to the nexus,” I murmured to Eilahn. “I’ll take a bath.” She offered no protest, a clear indicator of her exhaustion. After escorting me to the bathroom, she trudged down the hall and out the back door.
Vengeance of the Demon: Demon Novels, Book Seven (Kara Gillian 7) Page 22
