And she felt like the ultimate fool.
* * *
“Where’s Julia?”
The next person who asked him that was going to get cold-cocked, friend or not.
Guy glanced at Jamie and felt his jaw harden. “I sent her home.”
“Home?” he asked, surprised. “Why?”
“She started psychoanalyzing me and I didn’t care for it,” Guy said, inserting enough warning into his voice to dissuade further conversation.
Jamie smiled knowingly. “Let me guess. She wanted to talk about Danny.”
He snorted. “She doesn’t know what the hell she’s talking about, dammit, and yet she keeps insisting that--“
“--that it’s not your fault,” he finished. “Audrey did the same thing to me. I thought I told you that.”
Guy shook his head. “No.” He knew that Jamie had come back from Audrey’s camp a changed man, but had just always assumed that he’d made his own peace.
He got the grim suspicion he was about to learn otherwise.
Jamie laughed, remembering. “She hammered away at me the entire week I was there, man. Like a dog with a bone.”
“What did you do?”
“Changed the subject. Distracted her with sex. Walked away.” He smiled. “Then she rowed me out into the lake--in late September, no less--and set in on me, thinking that she’d trapped me, that I’d have to talk to her.”
Guy felt his jaw drop. Little Audrey? Wow. Now that took balls. He’d be hard pressed to try and trap Jamie his own self. “What did you do?”
Jamie laughed. “What the hell do you think I did? I told her that I was a friggin’ Ranger, by God, and I dove out of the boat and started swimming for shore.”
Guy laughed, not the least bit surprised. He could certainly see Jamie doing just that. “What did she do?”
“That was the amazing part,” Jamie said. He searched the crowded reception room until his gaze landed on his wife and a wondering expression came over his face. “She dove in after me.”
“Really?” Guy asked, stunned.
Jamie nodded. “And I know you don’t want to hear this, partner, but hearing her out changed my life. For the better, as I’m sure you’ve noticed.” His gaze turned speculative. “Women think differently from men, see things in a way that guys oftentimes can’t grasp. Pride and grief have a way of eroding logic.” He paused. “I hope you didn’t run her off because she was trying to tell you that Danny’s death wasn’t your fault. Because it wasn’t.”
Him, too? Guy thought. Dammit to hell, why couldn’t everyone leave him alone and let him grieve the way he wanted to, the way he deserved to. “I was unit commander,” Guy said harshly. “And I lost a man.”
“And I was supposed to have his back and I missed it.”
“You didn’t miss it--you were ambushed. How the hell were you supposed to prepare for that?” Guy demanded.
Jamie smiled knowingly. “Exactly.”
“I orchestrated the mission,” Payne said, having walked up on the tail end of the conversation. “We used my strategy. Technically, it could be my fault as well.”
“It’s your wedding day,” Guy said, disgusted at the tag team effort the two of them had going on. “We shouldn’t be talking about this.”
“You’re wrong,” Payne said. “We should have talked about it a long time ago.”
“Danny was our friend, Guy, and we miss him, but he would be miserable--insulted even--if he knew that we were blaming ourselves for something that came as a risk of the job.”
Insulted? Guy thought, remembering Julia’s comment from last night. An uneasy tingling started in the small of his back and settled in his stomach.
“He’d hate it,” Payne said. “And the best way to honor his memory is to stop blaming ourselves and celebrate the life he lived, not perpetually mourn the one he lost.”
Jamie clapped him on the back. “He wouldn’t want this, man, and not minding your business, but if Julia was special enough to bring home to meet us, then she’s worth fighting for.”
“You flew off the handle and ran that mouth, didn’t you?” Payne said. He tsked under his breath. “Emma and Audrey said that it’s obvious that she’s crazy about you. You can fix it.”
He sure as hell would like to know how, Guy thought, feeling the first quickening of dread and misery unwinding in his gut.
You helped me. I want to help you.
And he’d shut her out and belittled and berated her for her trouble.
He was an ass, Guy decided. A stupid, miserable ass.
“Is there anything we can do?” Payne asked.
“Go on your honeymoon,” Guy told him. “It’s bad enough I’ve dumped this shit on you at your wedding.”
Payne smiled at his bride, so in love it made Guy’s own chest ache. “It went off without a hitch.”
Jamie snorted. “You wouldn’t allow a hitch.”
And there was that, Guy thought. “Look, guys... I just want you to know--”
“We already do,” Payne told him.
Jamie grinned. “Hell, we’re friends, aren’t we?”
The best ones, Guy thought, humbled and touched and altogether blessed with their part in his life. He’d always known it, of course, but never had it been made more clear to him in this instant.
“You don’t have to hang around here,” Payne told him. “Emma and I are leaving shortly.” He smiled at him. “Go get your girl.”
Payne certainly knew what he was talking about when it came to that. They’d all loaded up and went after Emma for him.
Guy rubbed the back of his neck. “I--“
“Go get her, Guy,” Jamie insisted. “She’s the one for you. I knew it the instant I saw her.”
He had, too, Guy thought. And he’d been terrified ever since.
“Any ideas on how you’re going to win her back?” Jamie wanted to know.
Guy wracked his brain, knew that it was going to take something more than a mere I’m-dumb-ass-please-forgive-me. Besides, Julia deserved better. She deserved a grand gesture, something that she would know he’d done just for her.
And then it hit him. “Is her file still in the office?”
Payne nodded.
“Good,” he said, suddenly energized with a purpose. “I need a pirate costume and if she doesn’t come bail me out of jail, one of you bastards will have to do it.” He looked at Jamie. “It’ll have to be you, Flanagan. Payne’s going to be busy.”
Jamie gaped and Payne’s jaw went slack. “A pirate costume?”
“Bail you out of jail?”
Guy grinned at both of them, then congratulated Payne and slapped him on the arm. “Bye, guys. I’ve got a treasure to find.”
And her name was Julia.
CHAPTER 13
Chunky Monkey or Rocky Road? Julia wondered, staring morosely into her freezer. What the hell. She’d have both. She drug both containers out and promptly filled a bowl. Chocolate therapy, she thought, shuffling back into the living room. What else would a shrink need?
Besides a lobotomy and a new heart?
Why, why, why had she kept pushing him when she knew he’d been getting angrier and angrier? Why couldn’t she have done what he asked and simply let it go?
She knew why--she knew that he was hurting and she wanted to take care of him. But you couldn’t take care of someone who didn’t want to admit anything was wrong, and if she’d merely played along, she could still be with him, laughing and nuzzling and having wild, wonderful sex.
She’d still be with him, would have had another day, and then maybe another.
More nows.
If she’d only been patient, then she might have been able to bring him around by degrees. As a therapist, she knew this, but something told her that Guy McCann’s head was too thick to respond to that kind of treatment--it would have to be cracked open, emptied out, and reassembled, she decided, the idea drawing a small sad smile.
Unfortunately, she didn’t have t
he wherewithal to do it.
He’d basically kicked her out and she’d left because she’d been hurt and mortified by his rejection.
Her only consolation was that a.) she knew that she was right and b.) she’d driven her own damned car home.
Call her a cab, my ass. As though she were a hooker he’d met on the street that he could conveniently ship off at a moment’s notice. Logic told her that he’d been concerned for her safety, but her heart had been aching too hard to accommodate clear thinking. She’d--
Julia stilled as a noise snagged her attention and she listened closely. What was that? It was coming from the living room window.
She carefully set her bowl aside, fear making her pulse leap into overdrive. Another sound, this one more insistent, reached her ears and in a nanosecond she realized what was happening.
Someone was trying to break into her window.
Shaking so hard she could barely dial, Julia snagged her cordless phone and quietly moved to the kitchen where she promptly dialed 911. “What do I do?” Julia asked, terrified.
“Stay on the line until the authorities get there,” the operator told her.
“Shouldn’t I run? Aren’t I trapped in the house? I--
Her living room window shattered and she heard someone swear from outside. Julia frowned. The voice sounded oddly familiar. “Hold on a minute,” Julia said. “I’m going to check something out.”
“Ma’am, you don’t need to do that. Wait for the authorities. They should be there any minute now. Ma’am? Ma’am?”
Julia peered around the doorframe and watched as a leg encased in blousy black pants angled in through her broken window. “Son of a bitch,” she heard the intruder mumble. He braced an arm inside the frame and it was then that she noticed the shirt--white, equally blousy...almost like a pirate’s outfit. “...from a friggin’ stallion to gelding if I’m not careful,” she heard him say. “Honestly.”
Julia blinked, astonished. “Guy?”
He banged his head against the window sill and swore. “Motherfu-- Julia?”
“Ma’am? Ma’am?” came the insistent operator. “What’s going on? Do you know your attacker?”
She opened her mouth, closed it, then opened it again. “He’s not my attacker,” she said. “It’s fine. I know this man.”
Sirens sounded in the distance and to Julia’s astonishment, Guy actually looked pleased with the prospect of getting arrested. “Oh, good. They’re almost here.” He grimaced at the window. “Sorry about that. The door would have been too easy.”
“What the hell are you doing?” she demanded. “I could have shot you.”
“But you don’t have a gun,” he pointed out, looking at her hands to make sure.
“But I could have! What the hell is wrong with you? Why didn’t you knock like a normal person?”
“Because I’m trying to get arrested,” he said, seemingly exasperated with her because she wasn’t following his cockeyed logic.
Her eyes bugged. “Get arrested? Why?”
“So that I can give you a mug shot.” He paused and lowered his voice. “Along with my heartfelt apologies.”
The pirate suit, the mug shot. Julia felt a wild laugh break up in her throat. “Have you lost--“
The police roared into her driveway cutting off what she was about to say. Julia’s gaze swung from him to the blue lights flashing outside and stifled a groan. “Hold on,” she said. “Let me go take care of this.”
“No!” Guy insisted. “You have to press charges.”
He’d clearly lost his mind. “What?”
“You’ve got to press charges. For the mug shot.” That endearingly crooked smile curled his lips. “And then I was hoping that you would come bail me out.”
She knew she kept repeating him, but she couldn’t seem to help herself. It was too much. Unbelievable. “Bail you out?”
He nodded. “I’d appreciate it. And I want you to forgive me, too, if it’s not too much trouble.”
Her heart melted like a pat of butter over a warm bun. “Guy.”
A knock sounded at her door. “Police!”
“You don’t have to do this,” she said quickly. “I forgive you.”
“I know I don’t have to, Julia...but I want to. For you. Because you’re special.”
Uniformed officers burst into the room. “Freeze!” They tackled Guy to the floor and in short order had him cuffed. Rather than looking put out or frightened, he looked downright pleased with himself.
“You want to follow us to the station, ma’am?”
“Sure. How long before I can bail him out?”
The officer blinked. “What?”
“How long before I can bail him out?” she repeated. What? Had she stuttered?
Thoroughly confused, the cop looked from Guy to Julia and back again. “If you’re just going to bail him out, what’s the point in pressing charges?”
“It’s complicated,” Julia said, her gaze tangling with Guy’s.
An hour later, Julia watched Guy stroll across the parking lot toward her car. The pirate outfit ballooned around him and for a second he looked like the genuine article. She leaned her head out the window of her car. “Need a lift?”
Smiling, mug shot in hand, Guy climbed in beside her and hand the picture over. “Not bad, considering they took my eye patch,” he said.
Her heart pounding wildly, Julia nodded. Her mouth parched at the unbelievable gesture. “It’s nice. Thank you.”
“I owe you an apology,” he said without preamble. “I was an ass.”
“You are, but I knew that already. I should have left you alone.”
“Don’t you get it? That’s why I’m here.” He reached over and ran the pad of his thumb over her bottom lip. “I never want you to leave me alone. Call me an ass, tell me to go to hell, but don’t ever leave me again, even if I’m trying to run you off. “ He paused, swallowed tightly. “I need you.”
Her eyes misted, recognizing the gesture for what it was. In his own round about way her bad ass former Ranger, modern day pirate was trying to tell her that he loved her.
He was botching it up, of course, but...
“I love you, too,” Julia told him, chuckling softly.
He smiled and breathed a significant sigh of relief.
“And do you know what I’d really like you to do?” she asked him.
“Name it.”
“I want you to love me...now.”
That slow wicked smile she’d come to love spread across those sinfully crafted lips and he laughed softly, the sound eddying through her, vibrating ever nerve in her body. “Baby, just say the word,” Guy told her, then his mouth founds hers and sealed the promise with a kiss.
EPILOGUE
Three months later...
“Are we too late,” Julia asked, hurrying into the maternity waiting area. Guy trailed along behind her, content to watch her move.
Emma shook her head. “Nope. No baby yet. Jamie’s in there with her.”
“And you can bet he’s a nervous wreck,” Payne drawled, doodling his fingers on his wife’s upper arm. “Just like I will be six months from now when Emma delivers our first baby.”
Julia’s gaze swung to Emma’s and she gasped, then squealed with delight as Emma, misty-eyed, confirmed her husband’s announcement. Guy smiled and looked to Payne for confirmation. The Specialist nodded once.
“Didn’t waste any time, did you?” Guy asked. “Congratulations. You’ll make a fine father.”
Julia tugged at his arm, pressed her lips up against his ear. “You will, too,” she whispered.
Guy drew back and blinked. “Do you mean--“
A gorgeous grin spread across her lips and her eyes twinkled with delight. “I do.”
Emma looked from Julia to Guy and back again. Her eyes widened. “Oh, my God. Are you?”
“February eleventh,” Julia told her.
Impossibly, Emma’s eyes widened further. “Mine, too,” she breathed.
>
Payne chuckled and looked at Guy. “Sounds like someone else didn’t waste any time on my honeymoon,” he teased. “Congratulations.”
“Meet Daniel Garrett Flanagan,” Jamie announced proudly from the doorway, Colonel Garrett at his side.
“My great-grandson,” the Colonel said unnecessarily, beaming from ear to ear.
Emma and Julia instantly moved into place so that they could get a better look at the baby, but Guy and Payne hung back and the three of them shared a smile. An understanding passed between them, the unspoken communication that they’d used for years. Guy didn’t have to hear Jamie’s thoughts to know that he was more proud of his son than he’d ever been of anything in his life. Nor did he have to hear Payne say that Emma completed him, when one look at the two of them together told any fool that.
And as for himself, Guy thought. Well, he had Julia...and he wanted her now as much as he wanted her forever.
THE LONER - Sneak Peek!
Read on for a sneak peek of THE LONER, the 4th book in the Men Out of Uniform series...
PROLOGUE
“Oh, shit,” Lucas “Huck” Finn muttered, using every trick he’d learned as a U.S. Army Ranger--particularly those in Jump school--to guide his parachute toward the drop zone he instinctively knew he was going to miss. Call it a sixth sense, a premonition, a damned psychic moment, hell he didn’t give a damn.
He just knew he was screwed.
And on a friggin’ training mission at that, one he was running point. Because he’d been thinking about his father again, a man he’d never even met. Why? Who knew? Curiosity? Closure? He didn’t have any idea, but he couldn’t deny the faceless parent had been on his mind a lot in recent months. He’d even begun making inquiries, trying to find out the identity of the man. No luck yet, but the PI he’d hired assured him that it was only a matter of time.
The Maverick: Men Out of Unifrom Book 3 (Men Out of Uniform) Page 12
