by Soraya Lane
Her eyes were swimming when she looked up at him. “You,” she said simply. “But it looks like you’re having plenty of fun without me. It’s better this way, Nate; we both know that.”
Nate stared at Faith. He’d never had a woman speak to him like that, her honesty as brutal as a knife to his skin. She was telling him to go, and goddamn it, but he wasn’t about to beg. His jaw hardened, body like stone as he gave her a cool stare.
“Have a great night, Faith. I’ll see you around.”
He slipped his arms around the women again, not feeling like doing anything with them any longer but childish enough to want to hurt Faith, to piss her off and show her that he was fine without her. Which he sure as hell hadn’t been.
“Where’re we going?”
Nate kept his hands planted on the women’s asses as they left, nodding to the doorman as they passed and exited the bar. Once they were outside, he turned to first his left, then his right, giving each of the women a kiss on the lips before pulling out his wallet. He’d made his point, but he’d lost all interest in screwing them.
“Here’s enough money for a taxi fare,” he said, putting some bills into each of their hands. “Sorry, ladies, but tonight’s not the night. Maybe next time.”
He should have just taken them to bed, had the night of his life with two women at the same time, but all he wanted now was more damn whiskey. Then his head smashed into a feather-filled pillow for the better part of a day. And if he even thought about Faith again, he was going to smash his fist into something, anything to get the visual of her beautiful dark-brown eyes staring at him like he was the one who’d gone and broken her goddamn heart, not the other way around.
He walked to his vehicle, checked it was locked, then waved to a taxi driver. He was a fool, but dammit, he was in love with her. For the first time in his life, he’d let down the shield he’d so stringently maintained. When his mom had died, he’d loved his grandma dearly, but not the same kind of fierce love he’d had for his mom, and he’d vowed as a boy never to let himself hurt like that ever again. It was why he’d never had serious relationships, why he was so determined to never have children of his own, because he didn’t want to hurt like that again. He’d been the oldest brother, the one who’d had to be strong and keep it all together. And now he’d gone and let Faith get too close, and for the first time he wanted a woman he couldn’t have.
He settled into the backseat of the cab, gave the driver instructions, and shut his eyes as he pushed his head back into the leather headrest. Faith fucking Mendes had screwed with his head, but he was in love with her, goddamn it, and as far as he could tell she had no damn idea.
* * *
“How are you feeling?”
Faith shrugged and planted her straw between her teeth, sucking hard. They were drinking vodka, lemon, and lime, and the cold drink was at least giving her a brain freeze. Although nothing could numb her enough into not thinking about Nate.
“I just can’t stop thinking about him being with…” She let her voice trail off, not sure what she was actually going to say. The idea of him having sex with either one of those women made her feel physically sick, but two of them at once? It shouldn’t have surprised her, but it did. “Anyway, I was the one who left, right? That means he can be with whoever he likes, because it’s none of my business.”
Her friends smiled and nodded, but she knew they weren’t sure what to say. One minute she was telling them she was happy being single, and the next she could hardly breathe, having come face-to-face with the man who’d scared the hell out of her by making her feel things she’d always sworn she wouldn’t. She wanted him, but she couldn’t let herself, couldn’t give that part of herself away. And with Nate there was no other way; she’d seen that firsthand. The way she felt around him meant it was all or nothing.
Cara and Saskia both kept sipping, and she did the same. Then the music started to thump and she knocked back the rest of her drink and pushed it across the bar. The one thing she could do was drink until she was just numb enough to forget and dance the hell out of the night.
“Let’s dance,” she announced, running her fingers through her hair.
Her friends laughed and shrugged, finishing theirs and joining her, hips swaying as they started dancing with her. A clean-cut blond came up to her, grabbed her around the waist, but she smiled politely and pushed him away, nodding toward Cara. She was the one who’d like to be picked up—Faith, on the one hand, had no intentions of even flirting with another guy tonight. What she wanted was to be on her own with friends, have fun without needing a man. Cara, on the other hand, launched straight into some raunchy dancing, which had Faith in hysterics.
The music kept thumping and she danced liked she’d never danced before. And still the image of Nate with his arms around the blondes blasted her eyeballs.
Chapter 16
“WHAT the hell’s wrong with you?” Ryder asked as he caught up with Nate, his little girl riding on his shoulders and hanging on to him by his hair.
Nate wasn’t in the mood for talking, but he checked his attitude when Rose smiled down at him. When he glanced at Ryder he made a face.
“Shit. Your eyes look like all the blood from your head spilled into them.”
“Language around the little lady,” Nate growled, reaching out and linking fingers with Rose. She squeezed back before going back to holding on to her dad.
“So what happened last night?” Ryder asked.
“I just went to Joe’s for a few drinks.”
“And came home instead of going to the apartment with any…”—Ryder grinned and his eyebrows shot up—“company?”
Nate glowered at him. He wasn’t in the mood to talk shit. “I saw Faith.”
“Ah,” Ryder said, as if that was all the answer he needed. “Hence the bear with the thorn attitude.”
“You’re lucky you’ve got Rose with you,” Nate grumbled.
“Why? What the hell did I do?” Ryder asked, chuckling. “Faith’s the one who broke your heart.”
“She did not break my hurt, douche bag.”
“Hey, Nate, no swear-wing,” Rose said, one hand on her hip.
She at least made him laugh with her cute little lisp. “It’s not swearing to call your dad a douche bag, because he is one.”
Ryder punched him in the arm and he was only saved by the little person on his shoulders; otherwise Nate would have loved to smack him straight back and blow off some steam.
“The reason I can tease you is because I felt the same way with Chloe,” Ryder continued, hands on his daughter’s legs to hold her in place on his shoulders as he walked beside Nate. “When I thought I’d lost her, it was a pretty dark place.”
“How much do you remember about Mom?” Nate asked, voice gruff. “I mean, do you still remember how bad it hurt losing her, or were you too young?”
The smile fell from Ryder’s face like Nate had flicked a switch. “You think you’re the only one who doesn’t want to hurt like that again?”
Nate stopped walking, leaned on the fence they were passing, and stared out into the distance. “You honestly felt like that? I mean, before Chloe?”
“Man, I still feel like it,” Ryder admitted, taking Rose down and setting her on the wooden fence so she could be in between them. “I was damn scared of opening up to Chloe, and then when she told me she was pregnant? Hell, that was rough. I might have been younger than you, but I remember Mom and every emotion that came with losing her.”
“I can’t believe I’m getting love advice from my little brother.”
Ryder chuckled. “Yeah, but it’s the only advice you’ll ever need from me. You’ve always been the one there for us, from the day Mom died until now. You probably don’t have a clue how much we appreciate you, Nate, but you’re one hell of a big brother.”
He smiled, slinging his arm around little Rose and giving her a hug. “So what do you reckon I should do?” He hated being so honest about how he felt, but Ry
der was his brother. If he couldn’t talk to him, who the hell could he talk to, and keeping it to himself was driving him crazy.
“Do you love her?” Ryder asked.
Nate hung his head, shut his eyes, and immediately saw Faith in his mind. He’d be lying if he didn’t say yes; every part of him screamed yes, except that little part of him that didn’t want to admit to any sign of weakness.
“Maybe,” he muttered.
“Don’t give me that crap; it’s a simple yes or no question.”
“Yes, goddamn it!” Nate cursed, turning to stare at his brother. “I love her. Is that what you wanted to hear?”
Ryder smiled, but his grin was genuine. He wasn’t kidding around. “Then we need to figure out what you’re going to do about that.”
“We?” Nate asked, eyebrows shooting up.
“Hey, I’m not leaving you alone to f–”—he paused, checked himself and grinned—“stuff this up.”
“When do I ever stuff up?” Nate demanded, already sick of being the one getting advice.
“Never,” Ryder told him, pushing his boot on top of the wooden rail and leaning farther forward. “Which is why I’m looking forward to actually being able to help you for once.”
Nate mimicked his brother’s stance, staring into the distance again. “I think I need to let her go. She’s young, she wants to travel and make a career for herself, and…”—he swallowed, hard—“she’s Sam’s sister, which means I shouldn’t have gone there in the first place. Besides, she walked out on me. I can’t exactly chase her when she’s made it clear that she’s done with me.”
Ryder made a grunting sound. “All excuses. You can travel with her, you can give her all the freedom she needs because you like having your own space anyway, and screw Sam. If you love her, you’re gonna treat her right, and what the hell more could someone want for his sister?” He sighed. “And let’s not forget that my gorgeous yet infuriating wife walked out on me, too. When she left I thought I’d never see her again, let alone get her back in my bed.”
Nate nodded. “You really think Sam would forgive me? Hell, I’ve avoided him like the plague since the day she left.”
“He just wants her to be happy, to know she’s gonna be looked after and protected even if he’s not around. That’s all.”
“Says the guy who has no idea what it’s like to have a sister.”
“Hey, I’ve got a daughter,” Ryder countered, moving closer to Rose. She slung her arm around his shoulders, cute as a button. “And anyway, you could always propose. Look at how well it worked out for me.”
“I’m not asking Faith to marry me.” Nate thought about it, about how he could do it, what she’d say. It wasn’t that he definitely didn’t want to marry her, she was the only woman he’d ever been with he could say that about, but he doubted it was what she wanted. If it was, though … He cleared his throat. “Nope, no way am I going to ask the woman who walked out on me to marry me. If I ever decide to be crazy enough to propose, I’d have to be damn sure that she was going to say yes.”
Rose clapped her hands together, giggling. “I wanna pretty dress for the wedding!”
Nate and Ryder both laughed, Rose managing to soothe Nate when for the first time in his life he didn’t know what the hell he was doing, what his plan was.
“I need to do something big, though, don’t I? I mean, if I can’t suck it up and forget she ever existed, I have to do something to get her attention. Show her that she was crazy to walk away from what we had, right?”
“Yeah, you do,” Ryder replied, lifting Rose down from the top rail of the wooden fence and placing her back on his shoulders. “If I were you, I’d take her somewhere in the plane.”
“I don’t want to impress her with money,” Nate disagreed, rolling his shoulders in a futile attempt to ease the tension in his neck. “It’s not the kind of thing she’d be won over with. You know how it is. I bet Chloe was the same.”
“Then impress her with where you take her. Make it special. Take her where only you would think to take her.”
Nate went to answer, then clamped his mouth shut.
“You know where, don’t you?” Ryder asked.
Nate slapped his brother on the back. “You’re a genius,” he told him, “a goddamn genius.”
“Here to help,” Ryder said with a laugh.
Nate grinned and blew Rose a kiss before calling out good-bye and leaving them. He was going to do it. There was no way he was going to let Faith be the one to walk away from him without at least showing her that he gave a damn about her and telling her how he felt. Ryder was right, he did love her, and it was the first time he’d ever felt like that about a woman. For him, it was usually all about the chase, but with Faith it was different. Once he’d had her in his bed, his house, his life, he wanted her to himself all the time. Hell, he didn’t even have any desire to be with other women, and that was saying a hell of a lot.
But he knew what to do, to show her that he’d listened when she’d been talking about her dreams, to prove to her that he was the right man for her, that he wasn’t going to hurt her or lose interest in her. And if he stood any chance of winning her back, he needed to do it now.
Nate had walked fast and now that he was closer to the house he checked the reception on his phone, seeing two bars now instead of one or none. He dialed his assistant, pleased when she picked up on the first ring.
“It’s me; I need you to—”
“Nathaniel, where have you been? I’ve been trying to call you for the last hour.”
His back bristled at his being asked where he’d been when it was no damn business of hers; then he realized that he needed to ease the hell up a bit. If he was going to ask Faith to be part of his life, he had to get used to being accountable to someone other than himself.
“Where the hell I’ve been is—” he started before he was interrupted.
“It’s your grandfather,” she said in a low voice. “The doctor wants you all there now, which is why I’ve been trying to get hold of you.”
Nate swallowed, his heart pounding, blood running so fast through his body that he felt like he was about to keel straight over if he tried to walk. But he needed to run, to get Ryder and then make the fastest trip of their lives into the hospital.
“Did they say…” He couldn’t even get the words out.
“He had a massive stroke: they don’t expect him to hold on much longer.”
The blood that had been running through him so damn hot turned cold as ice. Nate took a deep breath, then started to walk fast back in the direction he’d come. “Call the doctor back; tell them I’ll be there. Tell them to do anything they can to keep him alive until then. And call Chase.”
As soon as he hung up, Nate’s fast walk turned into an all-out sprint, his legs pumping, covering the ground as fast as he did when he ran in the mornings, trying to jog away his demons.
“Ryder!” he called. “Ryder!”
It didn’t take long for him to find them, Ryder wandering along without a care in the world and Rose still riding on his shoulders.
“Hey, don’t tell me you need more brotherly advice already?” Ryder joked.
The smile died on his brother’s face faster than it had appeared and Nate took a few deep breaths, blowing hard, before breaking the news to him.
“It’s Granddad. I think it’s the end.” Nate reached for Rose, taking her down from Ryder’s shoulders and folding her in his arms instead. He needed to hold her and there was no way Ryder could run with her up there, and every part of him was screaming out that they needed to hurry; hell, they might already be too late. “We need to go now.”
They both jogged back toward the house, pacing themselves, not saying a word. Fuck. Nate wasn’t ready to say good-bye to the man who’d raised them and taught them almost everything they knew, and he doubted either of his brothers was, either. His granddad meant the world to him, and once he was gone Nate would be running the King empire without guidance.
It shouldn’t have and he’d never admit it to another soul, but the idea scared the shit out of him.
When they finally stopped, both heaving, Nate set a wide-eyed Rose to her feet and let Ryder take her hand. Nate stared at Ryder.
“This is the end, isn’t it?” Ryder said in a quiet voice. “It’s time to say good-bye.”
Nate nodded. “Take her back to Chloe and I’ll bring the car around.”
They went separate ways. Nate broke into a run again, but it was like he wasn’t in control of his body. When he stopped, his hands were shaking as he hunted for his keys, the back of his throat burning. For a guy used to shielding himself from emotion, the pain was so bad it took all his willpower not to double over and vomit from the waves of terror draining every inch of strength from his body.
His phone rang again and he picked up before getting into the vehicle.
“Yes!” he demanded, thinking it was going to be more news, worse news.
“Nate, it’s Chuck!” the man yelled down the line. “We’ve hit oil! The bloody stuff is spurting up like crazy!”
Nate’s eyes stung, an unfamiliar burn prickling hard. He cleared his throat. “Great. Thanks for the call.”
He hung up, stopped for a moment, needing to catch his breath. Nausea rocked him, the bile in his throat choking him as he bent over beside the car.
“Damn you!” he yelled.
The one thing he’d wanted was his granddad to see the oil, to be there and watch it, to see it happen. And Nate knew in his heart that his grandfather was already gone.
* * *
“Nate?”
Nate looked up. He was exhausted, every bone in his body weary as he finally walked away from his granddad’s room. Nate was grateful to have had the last few hours alone with his brothers, so they could say their good-byes, but it had taken everything from him.
“Hey, Sam,” he managed, locking eyes on his friend as he stood from a seat in the small waiting area. The brothers had requested not to be disturbed, just the three of them wanting to spend time alone, but Nate noticed that Chloe and Hope had both been waiting, too, their arms around Ryder and Chase now that they’d walked out behind him.
