by Jane Plume
CONTENTS
Cover
About the Book
About the Author
Title Page
Dedication
Author’s Note
Prologue
PART ONE
CHAPTER 1
The start of a beautiful friendship
CHAPTER 2
Reunited
CHAPTER 3
Bouncing babies
CHAPTER 4
A love renewed
CHAPTER 5
Broken hearts
PART TWO
CHAPTER 6
Farewell, my friend
CHAPTER 7
Soldiering on
CHAPTER 8
Planning for the future
CHAPTER 9
The drugs don’t work
CHAPTER 10
Slipping away
CHAPTER 11
Too many goodbyes
CHAPTER 12
A new beginning
Acknowledgements
Copyright
About the Book
A promise that would change their lives forever.
When Gina’s husband Shaun was diagnosed with terminal cancer in 2009, Jane vowed to do everything she could to help her best mate and Gina’s two small sons through the awful time to come. But things took a tragic turn for the worse when Gina was killed in a shock car crash. Though devastated by her own grief, Jane knew that Gina needed her now more than ever – to help with the boys she had left behind.
This is the moving true story behind an incredible act of love.
About the Author
Jane Plume won the Leicester Mercury’s Mum of the Year Award for her selfless devotion to her family. She lives with her own three children and Gina’s boys in Leicestershire.
To Marco, Millie, Lewis, Ashton & Anni-Mae
~ Quite simply, my world ~
AUTHOR’S NOTE
I have to confess I was somewhat overwhelmed when the opportunity came up to write this book. But the more I thought about it, the more I wanted to do it. I wanted the facts to be put down on paper for Lewis and Ashton and any future family they might have, and I wanted them, and the whole world, to know what wonderful people their parents were.
I couldn’t think of a better way to pay tribute to the wonderful friend that Gina was. Naturally, I discussed the book with all five of the children before agreeing to go ahead. Anni-Mae and Ashton don’t really understand, but were very excited about a book being written with their names in. Lewis, Marco and Millie all had the same reaction: ‘Go for it!’ Getting the backing from them was all I needed. I spoke to other family members and friends who all thought it was a lovely idea and said they would support me. It has been heart-wrenching at times I admit, but in some ways therapeutic, helping to bring to the fore of my mind all the happy memories that grief somehow locks away.
Lisa, Hayley and Gina’s sister Keri have all said to me that Gina would have loved the thought of a book being written about her. She would have laughed her socks off and danced around, crowing, ‘Oh yes, get me. That book is all about me!’ They are absolutely right.
I hope she would have liked it. I hope I’ve done her proud.
Gina – this is for you.
PROLOGUE
Tuesdays had always been my least favourite day. Tuesday was evening surgery at the medical centre where I worked, and that meant it would be past eight o’clock before I got home to the kids.
On 12 October 2010 at 12.30 p.m., I arrived at the clinic as usual.
‘Hopefully it will be quiet later,’ I remember thinking, ‘so I can give Gina a call.’
She was my best friend and we were planning one of our regular ‘girly nights’ that Friday, which meant face masks, pedicures and too much wine. It would end up messy, with us giggling like a couple of school kids. I couldn’t wait.
Shortly after two, my mobile phone rang and the caller display told me that it was Gina’s mum. My first thought was, ‘Why on earth would Gina’s mum be ringing me at work?’
I picked up the phone. ‘Hello, you,’ I said, in a light-hearted, breezy voice.
Nothing could have prepared me for what I was about to hear.
PART ONE
CHAPTER 1
THE START OF A BEAUTIFUL FRIENDSHIP
‘You’d love Gina, one of the girls I work with,’ my old friend Hayley said to me over a cup of coffee one lunchtime. ‘She’s mad as a hatter, just like you. I reckon you’d get on like a house on fire.’
It was 2000 and I was working as a clinical studies coordinator for the pharmaceutical company AstraZeneca in Loughborough, and I loved my job. Don’t get me wrong, the work was intense, at times difficult, and the hours, combined with the fact that I had recently become a single mum to Marco and Millie – then aged six and four – following a split from my husband, meant that my life was hectic. But I was happy and had the support of my family and some really good friends.
Hayley was one of these friends. I had known her since she was 16 and she had been my bridesmaid at my wedding. She also worked for AstraZeneca, though at a different site. It wasn’t the first time she had mentioned Gina, and she wasn’t the only one. I had heard the name Gina Hibberd mentioned by various other colleagues and I remembered seeing a site-wide email when she got married a few years before, so I knew she was a PA in another department but I had never spoken to her and didn’t really give the conversation much thought after that.
A few days later, Gina came up to the clinical studies department and as soon as she walked in the door I knew who she was from the way our colleagues had described her. I heard her before I saw her and, to be honest, my initial thought was ‘The gob on that! God, she’s loud’. When Hayley had described Gina to me, she had told me a couple of times, ‘You can’t miss her smile.’ She was so right; Gina had the biggest, widest, most genuine smile I had ever seen. It really did light up the room. Apart from her loud voice, it was the first thing that struck you. She was quite tall, compared to my five foot two inches at least, and in her heels she seemed to dwarf me. She had lovely shoulder-length shiny chocolate-brown hair and big brown eyes. On that occasion, Gina was smartly dressed, looking very professional, and I remember thinking that her clothes didn’t really match her personality, which was so bright and outgoing. That was easy to see within a few moments of meeting her.
‘You must be Gina,’ I said, and before I could say any more she simply said, ‘Jane! Hayley has told me so much about you.’
We spent a little time talking and Hayley was right, we hit it off straight away. She asked after my children and I learned that she had been back at work for just under a year after having her first son Lewis, who was almost two years old. We chatted for a while and agreed we should meet up sometime for a night out with Hayley.
The next day I was pleasantly surprised to find an email from Gina in my inbox. ‘Do you fancy getting together with Hayley and me for lunch one day?’ she asked.
I didn’t hesitate in replying. ‘Definitely!’
A few days later I emailed Hayley and Gina and arranged a date to meet at the work canteen. The self-service restaurant was noisy and heaving with people when I walked in so I scanned around the faces looking for the girls. Gina was easy to spot – or rather her smile was. She really stood out from the crowd. I walked over to the table and she explained that something had come up and Hayley couldn’t make it. But it didn’t matter a jot. We chose our food and sat back down and the conversation flowed easily for the next hour. We had a blast and during lunch we discovered that we had a lot in common. Crucially, we shared a similar sense of humour and I thoroughly enjoyed her company.
After that I would often meet Gina for lunch, sometimes with other people, bu
t sometimes just the two of us. I felt totally comfortable in her company. She was funny, honest, warm, compassionate, considerate and so kind. I was thrilled to have found such a lovely new friend.
Sometime later I was speaking to Hayley and she explained discreetly that Gina and her husband Shaun had decided to separate for a while. She told me that Gina was feeling a bit overwhelmed and wondered if I would be able to speak to her, so we could talk through the practical aspects of being a single mum. ‘Of course I will,’ I replied, slightly surprised. ‘Why didn’t she just ask me herself?’
‘She didn’t want to impose or put you under any pressure,’ explained Hayley.
Rather than ring Gina I sent an email, saying that Hayley had told me about the separation and that if she needed anything she simply had to ask. I received a reply almost immediately, thanking me and asking if we could get together, so we agreed to meet the following day. Over lunch we talked about how I managed on my own, juggling kids and work, the practical problems, the financial help available and so on. As I left her I gave her a warm hug, saying, ‘You know where I am if you need anything.’
A few days later, I happened to be throwing an Ann Summers party with a few of my girlfriends. It wasn’t anything too rowdy, just an excuse for a bit of a giggle with some nibbles and a few bottles of wine. Hayley had already said she was coming. I decided to invite Gina along too. I wasn’t sure if she would accept, as she would only know me and Hayley. While I thought she might appreciate the chance to let her hair down, I knew from experience it was a fragile time and she might not be ready to face a room full of strangers. When I mentioned it, though, she jumped at the chance – anything for a laugh.
The only problem was that Gina lived half an hour’s drive from my house, which meant that she wouldn’t be able to help us out with the wine. So I told her she was welcome to stay the night.
‘There are a few others staying,’ I joked. ‘So the first to get the beds are the lucky ones and the rest will have to crash on the floor.’
I was a bit concerned that Gina would feel out of place, but I certainly didn’t need to worry. She fitted in straight away, giggling and joking with all the guests as if she’d met them all before. A couple of friends remarked on what a great laugh she was and how much they enjoyed her company. Luckily, Gina seemed to be enjoying herself immensely and I was pleased.
At the end of the night, it transpired that Gina was the only one who needed a bed for the night, but that wasn’t a problem. As we waved off the last of my friends, Gina helped to tidy up, chatting away about nothing in particular, then we both flopped into an armchair each, our glasses topped up with wine, tucking into leftover nibbles just for the sake of it, and sat talking until the early hours of the morning. Gina asked about my family, about Marco and Millie, past relationships and so on. She was so easy to talk to and I felt so at ease around her that I was happy to talk about everything, even the more miserable parts of my life, and I told her all about my family.
• • •
My parents had me later on in life, so there was a big gap between my brothers and sister, and me. When I came along my sister Ann was already 21, married and pregnant. In fact my niece, Sam, was born just twenty-two days after me! My brothers, Mick and Rich, were 15 and 14 when I was born and throughout my life have been the archetypal big brothers: always overprotective, but always close.
We were a tight-knit bunch and I was brought up being told that family is everything. That meant the extended family too. I have such fond memories of my childhood. Holidays always included aunts, uncles, cousins and family friends staying together at a caravan park for the ‘July Fortnight’, playing on the beach together, running through the sand dunes and paddling in the sea.
Because Ann was so much older than me, and living away from home, I often forgot she was my sister. But we saw a lot of her and Sam was like a sister to me, so much so that I used to tell people she was. We shared everything and, until we were about 14, she came on every holiday with us.
As I got older, and understood the family dynamic a bit better, I was so proud to have a big sister as well as two wonderful big brothers. We were all very close and there was nothing that I couldn’t share with them about my life, both positive and negative.
At the age of 16, I was already working as a dental nurse. One day in November I met Sam for lunch in town near to the practice that I worked at. She was staying with my mum, dad and me for the weekend so we made our plans for that night and I went back to work having arranged to meet her on the bus.
An hour or two later, my life changed forever, as I told Gina with a catch in my voice. Mick’s wife arrived at my work and, when I went to greet her, puzzled at her arrival in the middle of the afternoon, she told me, as gently as possible, that my beloved dad had collapsed and died. She took me home and I remember standing outside our house, wanting to run through the front door to get to my mum but too afraid, because I could hear her crying from outside. Eventually I opened the door and went in, kneeled on the floor in front of my mum, buried my head in her lap and sobbed.
My dad had collapsed and died from a ruptured aneurysm at the age of just 64. All that evening, people were coming and going but I didn’t really hear what they were saying – all I knew was that my dad had gone.
While the family made arrangements for the funeral, Mum and I stayed with Mick, who lived over the road from my sister, for a couple of days and I remember feeling utterly useless. I wasn’t old enough to help in any practical sense so I just sat holding Mum’s hand whenever I could.
My family had always been close but this terrible event made us even closer. My mum was absolutely heartbroken and I worried about her constantly.
Six weeks after his death, we spent Christmas together and did what we could to make it fun, particularly for my younger nieces and nephews. My mum was determined to make the best of it for their sake. ‘It’s what your dad would have wanted,’ she would repeat over and over again.
On 30 January, the day before my 17th, I was at home, having booked a couple of days off for my birthday. In the middle of the morning, Mum asked me to go and collect my grandma’s pension from the post office for her as we were having lunch with her shortly. I grumbled a bit, as any 16-year-old girl does, but left shouting back to my mum that I wouldn’t be long. I was almost at the end of my street when Mum shouted from the window. I tutted loudly and headed back to our house. ‘Sorry,’ she said. ‘I forgot to ask you to pick up some potatoes.’ I turned to leave again, as she said, ‘I love you, Jane.’ There was nothing unusual in that; my family were open and honest and we regularly told each other ‘I love you’.
‘Love you too, Mum,’ I replied, heading off once again down the street. By the time I returned, I could only have been gone forty minutes.
‘I’m back,’ I shouted. No response. I smiled to myself. Mum having her lunchtime nap then. I quietly opened the door to the lounge where my mum sat on the sofa and I walked over to gently wake her to tell her it was time to go to my grandma’s. As soon as I reached her I knew something was very wrong. I ran round to our neighbours, bursting through the door without knocking.
‘It’s Mum,’ I shouted. The neighbours came running back with me and the rest is just a blur. Somehow, someone had spoken to my brother who worked in the same village and he was soon there, as were an ambulance crew. They tried to save Mum but they were too late. She had suffered a fatal heart attack at the age of 59, just eleven weeks after Dad had died. I was now an orphan.
I really don’t know how I would have got through those times without my extended family. My brothers and sister became everything to me – my guides, my confidants, my world.
In turn, Gina opened up to me about her past and present. She spoke a lot about Lewis and her former partner Shaun, and we shared some general banter about being better off without men, laughing at their shortcomings and how it was easier for us to be on our own. Somehow, though, when Gina said this sort of thing about Sha
un, her defiant message didn’t reach her eyes, so I guessed that it never reached her heart either.
World set to rights, we called it a night – but it was just the beginning for our friendship.
• • •
On another occasion soon afterwards, as we said our farewells after meeting up with a group of other people, Gina said quietly to me, ‘Fancy coming round with the kids tomorrow?’
I was free and it beat hanging around my own house with the kids, so I readily agreed and the next day we introduced the three children to each other.
Marco, aged six, was quite a shy little boy, having not long started school, where he often got teased for his bright ginger hair. Millie, at four, was also quite timid, except when she was around her big brother. I think some of her shyness was my fault though, as she had been born prematurely and I’ll admit I was rather overprotective at times. With my two quiet children safely buckled into their car seats behind me, I watched them closely in the rear-view mirror as I drove over to Gina’s house. I wasn’t sure how they’d take to Gina’s outgoing nature or to making a new friend in Lewis.
We pulled up on the drive at the front of the house that Gina was sharing with Lewis. I had explained to Marco and Millie that they were going to meet Mummy’s new friend and that she had a little boy they could play with. They slowly hopped out of the car and stood behind me on the driveway, Millie burying her face behind my legs as we walked up to Gina’s porch.
I knocked on the door and Gina opened it, greeting us all with her trademark smile. ‘Hey, you two,’ she said in a bubbly voice as she guided them through the front door. ‘I’ve heard so much about you and Lewis can’t wait to meet you.’ It soon became clear that I needn’t have worried about them getting on. While my two were quite shy and reserved, Lewis was like his mum and rushed into the room like a tornado.
‘I’ve got a racing car track in my room, want to come and play?’ he babbled. At just two years old, Lewis was falling over his words. I heard ‘race’, ‘car’, ‘bedroom’, but even I was unsure of the rest. Gina translated for us. ‘He has his racing car track in his room,’ she smiled warmly. ‘He wants you to go and play.’ Marco and Millie looked at me, unsure.
